When she comes across your online dating ad

Posted by James, 23 Oct

online-dating-ad.jpgMost people nowadays have online dating ads or profiles. With many people turning to the internet to find love, this isn’t so surprising. So what do you do when you bump into your boyfriend's or girlfriend's online dating ad?

There was this guy that met his woman. Initially, he had an online dating ad that he was using previously… but not when he was with this lady. The other day, the woman came across his ad on his computer browser and went ballistic. This guy tried to apologize to this lady but it seems that this incident made her interest levels in this guy go down. Eventually, this lady dumped this guy.

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Was she being realistic by getting annoyed and even dumping this guy just because he had some online dating ad before they met? I think most people see having an online dating ad as cheating especially when you are in a committed relationship with someone. It’s kind of like someone is covering their bases just in case something goes wrong with your current relationship.

But most people don’t remember to delete or remove their online dating profiles and ads once they find love. They just become dormant. So, is it bad to maintain an online dating profile when you finally find love? Is this some form of cheating?

Should you remove your online dating ad when you finally meet a woman or man you love?

Tags: online dating profile, online dating ad

5 responses to "When she comes across your online dating ad"

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  1.   fkoi says:
    Posted: 24 Mar 10

    I agree. If you are dating someone exclusively, a truthful man doesn't go trawling singles' bars.

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  2.   bdsista says:
    Posted: 11 Jan 10

    I think its good to be upfront about your site and if you move to mutual exclusivity, then put your profile on hold, or say, I met someone and thanks I am going to see what's what. But don't say you are exclusive and leave your site up to hedge your bets, you can BET that your partner will be hurt and confused.

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  3. Posted: 12 Nov 08

    Obviously, keeping your ads updated is a good idea, but I know that I personally have been at this for close to a decade... (I'm picky...) So I've got accounts in places I don't even remember. Things fall through the cracks. What is a reasonable reaction to this though? Take a second to double check your info; how old is this profile, when was the last time it was updated, when was the last time this user logged on? If it's been stale longer than you've known the person, odds are pretty good that they haven't been using it. The other thing to keep in mind is to be mature about it. Instead of blowing up, question the person about it. If they're willing to go and update profiles to show their commitment, no biggie. As for removing profiles altogether (other than primarily social networking sites like Facebook and Myspace), I think most of the adults I know are mature enough to realize that it's probably a little to soon for that unless you've decided that this is the person you've been searching for.

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  4.   Mzungu1967 says:
    Posted: 07 Mar 08

    I think the solution is to update the profile and state you've found someone. This solution comprehends that a substantial part of our lifes and our presence is in fact online nowadays, and by displaying you've been taken, you keep the realm, display your success and remain honest at the same time. That is a fair solution for everyone. Then one might argue, it's still mischievious to even have the profile! I think it is a matter of maturity and ability to embrace the online culture. Today the profile is so much more than "I'm male - i want a woman" or visa versa. It's more like an online CV - an online identity card with interests, network, links and pictures. I admit, that having an add on a "sex-seeking site" is downright a bad idea. But should you also ditch Myspace? HI5? FanBox? Facebook? etc. Do you ditch your best suit in the warderobe, just because you're going steady?

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  5.   quiet_muse says:
    Posted: 28 Oct 07

    If you think you've found someone that you want to make a go of it with, take the ad down. Otherwise, you'll be perceived as still looking. If she's made you stop looking, why continue to have it up? That's like you're enjoying the relationship that you have now, but you keep it open, just in case someone better comes along.

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