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How to Set Goals to find your Mate

Posted by Leticia, 08 Feb

You know it's hard to turn on a TV or pick up a book these days and not hear or read about the importance of setting goals to get what you want in life. What about love goals? And if you are looking to have a great "interracial" relationship is there a different set of goals that you need to set to be successful? Truth be told, one of the biggest challenges that multicultural couples face is dealing with people outside of the relationship that don't get it. But, let's get focused on setting our "relationship" goals first...we'll fix the world later.

Whatever the goal...write it down! Claim it! Own it! It is yours, so act as if you've already got it.

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So, let me ask you this question. No matter how old you are right now, 21, 41 or 71, what kind of person do you want to be? Is that different than the type of person that you really are? Write it down. Then besides it, write down the kind of person you want to attract. Be honest. You can't achieve what you don't believe and you'll never attract if you only "re-act". Take control of finding the love you not only desire, but the love that you deserve. Writing down these love goals help you get clear to what you are looking for. You're less likely to waste time with someone that doesn't have the qualities that you want in a mate or, someone that is looking for a "different" on-line experience than you are.

Now as I write this I must tell you to have an open mind. Sometimes we get so "set" on what we think we want; what we can't do without, that we miss an opportunity to meet someone that might not be perfect for us, but they have a friend that is. Opposites don't just attract in intimate relationships. They exist in friendships and families too. It's important to keep in mind that we select our mates like we order food. Think about it, some people like mustard, some miracle whip. There are men that prefer blondes over red heads and some women that prefer John Lithgow over Colin Farrell. (Maybe that's just me). So, if you chat with someone and they tell you that you are not what they are looking for...don't take it personally, it's just their preference and not a reflection of you.

Finally, another advantage to writing down your love-goals it that it's a great start to putting together your on-line profile, the first step at attracting the type of person that you are looking for.

RECAP...

1. Write it down

2. Be honest

3. Be clear

4. Don't settle or waste time

5. Act not re-act (take control)

6. Create a profile that speaks to who you are...now!

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  1.   maishagal says:
    Posted: 07 Feb 07

    nice article clear, concise, and stright to the point!

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  2.   Kelly01 says:
    Posted: 18 Jan 07

    The article helps one focuss. The only idfficulty I am having with the article comes form my past experiences on line and I fine that Many men out right lie. It take a while for the lies to become clear then I step off

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  3.   sweetnes20 says:
    Posted: 07 Jan 07

    we all should help out are partners.

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  4.   UNME23 says:
    Posted: 05 Jan 07

    great article to read, thanks.

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  5.   ebonybeautyj says:
    Posted: 28 Dec 06

    Humm never thought of it this way!

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  6.   mossimo36 says:
    Posted: 01 Dec 06

    Interesting idea. I agree with thinking clearly about what it is that you are looking for....whether its relationship wise or detail about the type of person one is interested in finding.

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  7.   nicefella115 says:
    Posted: 26 Nov 06

    you cant make somebody do something, you can just support them!!!

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  8.   ebonybeautyj says:
    Posted: 24 Nov 06

    My gosh is finding love this detailed??

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  9.   embraceme says:
    Posted: 12 Nov 06

    I THINK THAT GOALS TO BE SET BY ANOTHER IS ASKING FOR A BAD REALTIONSHIP.. BECAUSE YOU ARE SETTING YOURSELF UP FOPR A HARD FALL IF THE OTHER DOESNT MEET THE GOAL.. I THINK THAT A REALTIONSHIP IS SUPPOSE TO BE NATURAL NO DEMANDS.. LIVE LIFE AND LOVE

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  10.   Fala says:
    Posted: 06 Nov 06

    It sounds like a good idea but it only works if you're not a habitual procrastinator like me. :-(

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  11.   Carla says:
    Posted: 02 Nov 06

    The first step is writing down what you want . I think I have to practice it more and to make it a success

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  12.   arebw4you says:
    Posted: 27 Oct 06

    writting down what you want is always a good thing. I think I have to practice it more.

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  13.   SEBENELE says:
    Posted: 12 Oct 06

    THIS IS PART OF PERSONAL BRANDING, KNOWING YOURSELF AND HOW YOU COMMUNICATE ABOUT YOURSELF. TO KNOW WHO YOU ARE AND WHAT YOU STAND FOR.

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  14.   Fala says:
    Posted: 01 Oct 06

    Helpful advice. I think writing down your goals is a good first step to making them happen.

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  15.   sweetest1 says:
    Posted: 29 Sep 06

    This is an interesting view ppoint... I agree to a point-- but not completely.

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  16.   Coco says:
    Posted: 21 Sep 06

    Good idea...maybe I will work on this concept.

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