Dating Mr. White
Has our attitude about dating outside our races changed? Some writer in Detroit decided to try something different… something new: dating a White man. The attraction was there – good-looking guy with a sense of humor. One thing that was a plus for him was that he was liberal and smart. Being 39, the dude seemed like a viable option. "The older you get, the more open you become to the possibility of love… I would like love to come in a certain form or color. But at the same time I realize that the population of eligible Black men is getting smarter. So I'm open᾿ says the writer.
According to some polls, 45% of black women have been involved in interracial relationships. And as for those who haven’t, it’s not because they lack the opportunities… 70% have been asked out by a white guy. A lady who had watched the movie “Something New᾿ (in which the character falls for a White guy) says that movie was her signal to start chasing and accepting their offers. And she puts it this way: She is now looking for an Ideal White Man instead of an Ideal Black Man.
Find your soulmate on InterracialDatingCentral
Most people aren't fazed at all when they see a Black woman with a White man… Now go ahead and flip the script… Fifty-three percent disapproved of seeing a Black man with a White woman.
Successful black men who choose to "cross over" may draw additional ire because of the perceived notion among black women that Black men who have made it tend to prefer non-Black companions. I think Celebrity couples also play a role in influencing black women’s feelings. Yeah, we're cool with Halle switching from marrying Black men to dating Gabriel Aubry, a White model. But Kobe, Tiger, Terrence and Taye? Hmmm.
So do black women have double standards when it comes to dating outside the race? Leah who is 36 says while she was strolling with her date who is white, she got some chilling reactions. She got chants from black men: "Sellout! You think you White?"
I don’t know if it was the neighborhood that sees a Black Women and White Men dating as a NO-NO or is it that black men too have their double standards? Or even when it comes to white men dating Latino women, is that weird too? You tell me.
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70 responses to "Dating Mr. White"
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SEWilde says:Posted: 11 Sep 09
drs41 of 7-11-09 This reply could be futile, as I doubt you're still out there months later, but if you are, I think I might have some information for you regarding your film. SE
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ChannieBear says:Posted: 16 Aug 09So much is lost when we solely equate happiness with the color of skin. I cannot speak for others, but when I started dating outside of my race, a whole other world that I didn't really know about opened up to me. Does this mean I had to let go of the world that I had known for so long. No,I find black men as attractive as I find White men or Asian or Latin for that matter. What is important to me is as a man, are you able to communicate effectively with me, are you at least at my level so that we are moving in tandem, and my goals, successes don't overwhelm or intimidate you. I have to be attracted to you. This is what guides me. I grew up in a family with strong African American roots and foundation, but one thing my grandmother told me was never to limit my options for relationships solely because our skin color is not the same, and she pointed to the other ethnicities that have integrated into our family throughout the generations, each bringing with them a piece of culture that enrich our own, and I love it.
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renee24 says:Posted: 04 Aug 09
yes drs41 open dialog is the key to a greater and free society but also is racists detox tea (some people who have been blogging through out this site need to drink that) if people can't get past color and gender then how are we to get any where?
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julius26 says:Posted: 16 Jul 09Would sunshine and caribprinces watched the movier and like it if it was a black man chasing a white woman
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Azrazyel says:Posted: 12 Jul 09drs41: I would love to give you insight, but unfortunately I haven't experienced it yet....lol I'm sure you will find people though who will be more than happy to help you out. Good luck.
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drs41 says:Posted: 12 Jul 09This entire thread has been very fascinating. I am a writer and an independent filmmaker currently researching for a script on an interracial relationship. And many of the points in this discussion have already provided some valuable insight. So thank you to everyone who has provided an opinion. I have several questions I have been asking black women about dating white men throughout my research. If anyone involved in this blog discussion would be interested in helping me further by giving their honest answers and opinions to these questions, it would be very much appreciated. And, again, thank you to everyone who has been involved in this intelligent discourse. Open dialogue is the key to a greater and free society. All the best.
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thekid47 says:Posted: 14 Jun 09@Girasol and Eddix, both are spot on.. The problems with these subjects is that it is a search for an ideal __man, instead of a person that is ideal for you, irrespective of what their ethnicity is.. Phenotype is an interesting approach, however I just say look for someone who meets what you are looking for in a partner, and you match what they are looking for in a partner-that is the real issue-not what the person's epidermis looks like.
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Girasol says:Posted: 13 Jun 09
I am a white woman, my boyfriend is black. I didn't set out to look for a black man. To be honest, I was never particularly attracted to black men - it wasn't a racist thing, just a personal preference. I was never attracted to ginger-haired men either, for example (no offence to either of the aforementioned groups). But when I first met my man, we just got on so well, and he was really cute. I fell in love with him. I don't really think of him as "a black man", just a man with dark brown skin. Likewise, to him I am just "me" - who happens to be white. I guess it’s the case with many "interracial couples" - just two ordinary people who fall in love. When you're with the person, you don't even think of race – it’s only when others make it an issue that it becomes one. Also, where does one draw the "color" line. I mean, you can find a wider variation in skin tone between a White with translucent skin and blonde hair (Scandinavian type, for example) and a White with olive skin and black hair (Mediterranean type for example) than between, say, an olive-skinned White and a light-skinned Black or Mixed Race person. Yet the latter couple would be considered an interracial pairing, the former would not. Lastly, I'm not too fond of terms like “mixed race” and “interracial”, although I grant that they are necessary to discuss these issues, there being no alternatives. But these terms make me feel that couples like us are somehow crossing a forbidden boundary, or mixing up something that should be kept separate, which is nonsense of course. People are just people, wherever they fall in the “skin tone/hair texture/nose width” spectrum. Perhaps the term phenotype would be more appropriate – then we could talk about a “dual-phenotype” or “pheno-diverse” couple.
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Girasol says:Posted: 13 Jun 09
I am a white woman, my boyfriend is black. I didn't set out to look for a black man. To be honest, I was never particularly attracted to black men - it wasn't a racist thing, just a personal preference. I was never attracted to ginger-haired men either, for example (no offence to either of the aforementioned groups). But when I first met my man, we just got on so well, and he was really cute. I fell in love with him. I don't really think of him as "a black man", just a man with dark brown skin. Likewise, to him I am just "me" - who happens to be white. I guess it’s the case with many "interracial couples" - just two ordinary people who fall in love. When you're with the person, you don't even think of race – it’s only when others make it an issue that it becomes one. Also, where does one draw the "color" line. I mean, you can find a wider variation in skin tone between a White with translucent skin and blonde hair (Scandinavian type, for example) and a White with olive skin and black hair (Mediterranean type for example) than between, say, an olive-skinned White and a light-skinned Black or Mixed Race person. Yet the latter couple would be considered an interracial pairing, the former would not. Lastly, I'm not too fond of terms like “mixed race” and “interracial”, although I grant that they are necessary to discuss these issues, there being no alternatives. But these terms make me feel that couples like us are somehow crossing a forbidden boundary, or mixing up something that should be kept separate, which is nonsense of course. People are just people, wherever they fall in the “skin tone/hair texture/nose width” spectrum. Perhaps the term phenotype would be more appropriate – then we could talk about a “dual-phenotype” or “phenol-diverse” couple.
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Member says:Posted: 06 Jun 09
Dear VIP I can respect that. You shouldn't bow down to anybody. You should want to be with a man that is a protector and provider. The problem with your statement is people will believe that you have no backbone by saying "bow down". That is all I was pointing out. Good day
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vipgodess says:Posted: 05 Jun 09
Mr laurelton queens and prettybrowneyes, I didn't mean bowing down and serving any man! Duh! I prefer a dominant male but a loving equal relationship. A man I can look to as the head of the household and the protector. By bowing down I meant me not wanting to play the role of the man like a lot of woman do. I'm more into the old fashioned way of relationships. We bow down to each other!!!!!! Damn people were quick to get offended when I said bow down to a white man! mr laurelton queens I am far from desperate. I just know how to treat a REAL man!!!!!
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eddix says:Posted: 29 May 09
I'm black, I grew up in Alaska, I went to Catholic school and have dated women who are Black, Asian Hispanic and white. Now the majority of my Friends are asian. I remember how surprised everyone was when I stared dating a Nigerian like it was some shock but frankly I date what I like. Color has never been a factor. Looks yes and definitely personality because I get bored and it doesn't matter how hot a woman is. I dated the Nigerian for 3 years and then broke up . I played the field for a year. Now I am engaged to a white European and I think this whole race thing is stupid frankly. Date who you like. Make sure they love you but other than that screw everyone else and their opinions. In the end its who you go home to at night that matters in my opinion.
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butterscotchcandy says:Posted: 25 May 09
I love all men, but I just absolutely adore "white men", since I was a young girl. They turn me on so much. I think that one comment was wrong that a black woman would be chosen last. I have traveled all over the world, to fifteen countries to be exact and although I favor Vanessa Williams in my appearance I have had men of all races fall at my feet and get bug eyed!. Even the Chinese men in Hong Kong couldn't keep their eyes off of me. Black women are exotic and curvy and men love it all!. I don't care if black men run off with other races, cause I know that there isn't any race of man I couldn't have. At the end of the day all men are the same. They just want a good woman, who does not ride their ass all day. To all of my chocolate sister's don't believe the hype that white men think your ugly. That's just crap. Be nice, feminine and sincere and you will attract a good non black man if that is what you seek. I do advise many sister's to lose some weight and hit the gym. Some of us are too thick!. Not only that, but lots of white boys go to the gym too! Good Luck.
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pecantanqtee says:Posted: 12 May 09
I am blessed to be in a relationship with a wonderful, considerate, loving, affectionate, compassionate man...who happens to be Caucasian. After years of supressing my desire to date a man REGARDLESS of his race...I finally decided that enough was enough. Why should I rule someone out just because we don't share the same cultural background? Life is toooo short to sit at home alone waiting for my Black prince to show up. This man never fails to tell me he loves me, will call me during his lunchbreak just to hear my voice, picks up thoughtful little gifts, makes up songs and sings in his horrible offkey tone and has never made me feel unattractive or undesired. And I'm supposed to not like it or encourage it because he is white...shhhhh...I've been loving it for 2 years and will continue to enjoy it!!!!!
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clethodim says:Posted: 25 Apr 09
i'm a white man and CaribPrinces is so RIGHT!! we been in the hunt for CENTURIES now! PRAISE GOD THAT I'M ABOUT TO MARRY my very own IDEAL. BLACK. QUEEN. AMEN!
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prettybrowneyes says:Posted: 15 Apr 09
fedupwoman what do you mean by bowing down to a whiteman? I would love to hear your response.
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alexis.raye says:Posted: 15 Apr 09LADIES, LOVE U YOU WANT TO LOVE AND BE HAPPY! LIFE IS TOO SHORT TO BE CONSUMED WITH PEOPLE NOT ACCEPTING THE DECISIONS THAT YOU MAKE FOR YOUR HAPPINESS! YOU JUST BE HAPPY AND LET THE MAD,,, EXAUST THEMSELVES WITH BEING MAD... THEY OBVIOUSLY HAVE ISSUES WITHIN THEMSELVES. HOPEFULLY, THEY TOO WILL FIND TRUE HAPPINESS AND STOP BOUNCING FROM BLOG TO BLOG TRYING TO BRING OTHER PEOPLE DOWN. MAY GOD BLESS AND KEEP EVERYONE.
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Member says:Posted: 13 Apr 09
Well You can keep bowing your head. White men will choose you last. You pathetic excuse for a black woman. How a man will respect you if you bow to him. Black men and other races of men want a woman they can respect. Instead you look desperate and dumb. Nobody loves a desperate woman. Have a nice day.
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fedupwoman says:Posted: 12 Apr 09
I am a 26 year old black female and I have to say that I am more attracted to white men because they seem to be more responsible financially and family wise. I admire their dominance. Oftentimes blk men want to be treated like a king and made to feel like the dominant force in the relationship but these same blk men aren't taking care of their business. They are quick to blame blk women for the attitudes they have and their lack of knowing how to treat a man but blk men have to realize that these women don't know how to act with a man because many blk males have not been there to raise their families and teach their blk boys how to be men and their blk girls how to be women and interact with a man. White men have their women in check for the most part. Their women are being taken care of by them overall compared to blk men taking care of their women and families. I will gladly bow to a white man as long as we respect and love each other. Black women let's do ourselves a great service and let these men of other races love us!
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LuvWh!teBoyz says:Posted: 21 Jan 09
I don't like when i see Black men with White women,but I like seeing Black women with a White man.I'm a black woman and just lost my attraction to black men,Inow like white men cause they are really fun to me.I love their hair,how they talk,and just the way they are.But I still love my black people cause that's who I am.The U.S we see the world in black & white,we really need to stop that,because everyone is equal.And if I ever hear someone say "You'er with a white boy"in a bad way,I am so going to jail murder.I LOVE WHITE MEN!!!so get it right.
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Member says:Posted: 04 Jan 09
Naturalcd... You hit the nail on the head with your commentary for me. I was definitely one of those sistas that looked with disappointment to seeing a black man with a woman of another race (especially white). I couldn't understand it. I felt they abandoned black women. "What happened to the strong black family and keeping it alive?".. were my thoughts. "It's whack you would pick her when you get successful." I admit, the latter thought was the stereotypical norm. Well... I made a vision board at the end of 06'. A vision board is when you choose visual stimulation from magazines, books and anything pictured that would help manifest those things you desire in your life; and put them in a collage of some sort. In the love section of my board, I didn't discriminate when it came to the images I chose for what I wanted love to look like. So there were plenty pictures with white couples. As long as it dipicted the bliss I wanted, I used it. Wouldn't you know that now I'm dating a white guy that looks exactly like one of the pictures I chose! At first it was fun, different and intriguing. Now, I'm scared shitless cuz he is wonderful. We get along great, he treats me like a queen and he's handsome. I thought my husband would for sure be black. Maybe he could still turn out to be but, my whole view point has changed; and my mindset has completely shifted towards interracial relationships. I can totally relate to your revelation and change of heart. This has been a spiritual growth for me and, enabled a more expansive view towards other humans and their choices. God bless you and everyone else who has commented. I can relate to plenty points of view now. I cherish the black family,love to see it thrive and present a more positive outlook on our culture (ie; The Obamas and others) but, I also say God speed to the release of racial tension surrounding love and harmony which has no color. All the best...
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Daelyn says:Posted: 19 Dec 08
I'm a white male who is married to a Black woman, but up here in Vancouver Canada people are so liberal about dating other races it's become the norm to see interacial couples everywhere you go. I admit though that me and my other half do rarely see the White Male/Black Female thing going on but it does happen from time to time. Of course when the two of us walk by the two of them I actually find myself thinking ok, should I smile at them and acknowledge it or just act as if I don't see them. For some reason I find that more weird than anything else, and I have no idea why, maybe I just like to think that we are unique and special. There's been a few times when I see people notice us and look at us oddly, or point us out to someone else, or make a comment to eachother, but these are rare. The only time I felt uncomfortable was when we took a trip to Florida over two years ago and some older black couple passed us by at the Downtown Disney area and the husband said loudly at us "Oh boy". I ignored him, but considering that I was a foreign tourist I was really watching my behavior, luckily my wife wasn't paying attention or she would have said something which would have started a confrontation and I would have had to step in.
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e-dub says:Posted: 05 Dec 08
Let's all remember there is no shortage of jerks, idiots and @#$%^&*'s in this world and I include myself in that count. However, let's try to judge someone by their shortcomings. I know someone who said to his black mother: that he would never date a woman who had to straighten her hair. SLAP! "And that is for this black woman and all black women before me." Personally, I thought he was stupid and disrepectful -- file this one under he had it coming. You can't help people like that and I advise don't try, run the other way. Hopefully, as we grow under we grow wiser out grow our petty ways. We tend to see life through the lens of our personal experience just remember other people may have had completely different experiences and view the world with a completely different lens. So lets try not to assume the worse and make fools of ourselves by assuming the worse of other people. Although, I admit ocassionaly, I engage in a rousing round of thinking the worst of people and unfortunately I don't limit my cyncisim to lawyers and politicans
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Member says:Posted: 28 Nov 08
I commented in another post about a simlar topic...I think to some people it's a double standard. Like I mentioned before, the white guy I was with got called a "ni***r lover" by a black guy (beacuse we wre together.) I have no problem that black men want to be with white women...That means more white men for me! Wink,wink. I have no problem with interracial dating period. I just want to know why some people just can't get over the name calling. Blackbabe4- next time that happens...smile and say hello. That guy was stupid! Anyone who is in a Int RTLSHIP be it bw/wm or wm/bm and they look at you in dissapproval has a problem. They should know it does not matter. So why does a black woman with a white man differ from a white woman with a black man? If that guy that look at you that way then he must have had a serious problem.I don't understand why peple do silly things of that nature.
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blackbabe4 says:Posted: 14 Nov 08Get this! I have had a black man who was sitting with a blonde white women, look at me ugly because I was with a white guy! Go figure!
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cocobaker813 says:Posted: 17 Oct 08You know what it is? It's the double standard. I have to agree with the ladies who had to stand the lectures, the nasty looks and the "sellout" comments by Black men who saw me walking with(and sometimes I wasn't even dating)a White man, yet had no problem chasing and dating Asian and Latina women. I agree, the same Black men who had something to say to me, would be chasing the Latina woman, drooling over the Snoop/Pharell video that was shot in Rio with all the Brazillian women(not a dark skinned one among them), or the Filipino women. As a much younger woman, I admit wholeheartedly about having anger seeing Black men with nonBlack women, but having grown up, realized that I am a beautiful woman inside and out and that men come in "31 Flavors", as the old ice cream slogan used to proclaim, and I can date whomever I want to. Some Black men see the woman as the "caretakers of the race", but come on, don't expect us to sit and wait around while the wild oats are sown by the man, so we can finally settle down! To the Black men who don't want to date your mama...DON'T! Who is to say that a Asian or Latina or a Russian or Italian woman can't have the same attitude as your mom? Sure she doesn't say your name like your mom does, or have the same skintone, but last I checked, attitude has no color.
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tatted2death says:Posted: 03 Oct 08I see ChocPrincess is on point (once again). Go tell it on the mountain, sis....LOL the lectures and nasty comments need to stop on all fronts..... NO ONE belongs to anyone else (in that way); so why all the bytchin and moanin??? stop wasting your time in here hating and go out there and find your own "bit o sunshine" in whatever form, shape or color that may come. Maybe you don't even have to go out....look within....try it...you might be surprised. Peace and Blessings tatted2death
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1rockgodess says:Posted: 02 Oct 08He's white and I'm black...so? why are they taking pain killers over my head ache.. sux big time
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Vanilla_Passion says:Posted: 01 Oct 08
I've been attracted to various cultures since I was about eight years old. I am eighteen years old now, and the melting pot has fascinated me. I have an interracial book that consist of an Italian man's love for a black woman. In the area I reside in, one's choice is limited, especially if they wish to date interracially. When I was eight years old, I immediately fell for the Mexican guys. In fact I'm attracted to all men except black men. He can be Asian, Native American, Caucasian, or Hispanic. They are the apple of my eye.
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ChocPrncess says:Posted: 08 Sep 08I have always dated white men...in fact they have been my preference from day one...I've never dated a black man and most likely will not. It is simply an attraction thing. But I have never downed blak men. However...I have had more than a few black men give me a hard time for dating white men. Lectures, nasty comments, telling me I was a sellout or had a 'thing' for rapists (the old white men raped your ancestors thing). Spare me. No white man alive today has owned slaves! Oten these same black men who give me the blues...will turn around and date a white woman in a hot minute! Some even have had their white girlfriends with them while they were lecturing me about dating white men! What puzzles me even more are the black women who have had negative commentary! The way I see it is this...if there is such a shortage of black men as many claim (I frankly do not know if there is or not)...then be happy a black woman is dating white men...that frees up one more black man for the rest! LOL Seriously however...date whom you please...and don ot worry about who someone else is dating...unless they are trying to steal yours...
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phatkitty says:Posted: 01 Sep 08
TO ANSWER YOU POETLOVE: I ONLY WRITE IN CAPS BECAUSE IT IS FASTER AND MORE COMFORTABLE, IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU PERSONALLY. IF YOU THINK THIS IS SOME KIND OF PATTERN AMONG AS YOU SAY "OPEN MINDED PEOPLE" THEN OH WELL, CANT TELL YOU HOW TO THINK, EXCEPT YOU ARE SO OFF BASE.
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poetlove says:Posted: 06 Aug 08
To newyork girl I don't see anthing racist about dating the race you come from. There in lies the doube standard of this site if you find people of your own race attractive your some kind of racist. That's insane. To phatkitty (sic) I don't know where your view point is coming from. If something is uncomfortable a little for me and perfectly fine for you that's means we have a difference in opinions. That's what that is called. I don't really see it as the white man has everything and me nothing and the only sacred thing we can hold on to is black women. As that goes white men may have an advantage in a lot of ways as far economic lineage and all of that. But on numerous occasions I and many other black men either ascend higher in business, entertainment, Poetry etc. So they have nothing I covet. I find it appalling that so called open minded people leave all caps messages when I speak how I feel especially in a respectfu way Peace
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phatkitty says:Posted: 06 Aug 08
TO POETLOVE, CORRECT ME IF AM WRONG HERE, WHAT REALLY DISTURBS U THE MOST ABOUT SEEING WM DATING BLK WOMEN IS,THAT BLACK WOMEN SHOULD BE HANDS-OFF RIGHT? AND THAT THEY (WM) HAVE EVERYTHING, WHY SHOULD THEY HAVE ACCESS TO THE BLK WOMEN AS WELL. IF AM WRONG, ANSWERE ME AND EXPLAIN, BECAUSE I COULD NOT COME UP WITH A BETTER REASON.
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tellmelater says:Posted: 05 Aug 08
There is nothing wrong with saying that you want to date someone who reminds you of your mother. Someone who reminds you of her principles, morals, and values. I think that's what many men do anyway. But those kind of women are hard to find unless you go down south or the DR.(Dominican Republic)
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naturalcd says:Posted: 03 Aug 08
I have to confess that in the past I viewed brothers who dated/married white women were sell-outs. On the flip side, I admired black women who dated/married white men. I had that disturbing viewpoint because of the common cliches; I bought into the hype that black men wanted white women because they are more docile, weren't "ghetto" like black women (whatever that is), had the ideal thin body type, hair, etc. I would literally look at the couple in disgust. I never thought I would end up being with a white man. Hell, I have been with black and white dogs but held on the fact that I needed to date then eventually marry a black man to uphold that "strong black family" mentality. I never knew that I would fall in love with a white man. I admit it, I had double standards when it came to dating and I kick myself everytime I think about it. Oh, I know that there are a few interracial relationships that exist because of the stereotypes/hype people buy into. But on the other hand, I am realizing that true love can come out of this. I, had to come to terms with my own insecurities being with a white man. Does he want me only because of my curves? Am I some sort of fantasy that he's playing out? I could not hold onto these doubts any longer because of the way he treats me like a queen...I had to let it go...seriously before I missed out on something special. I'm so sorry that this is a long post but I am soooo glad I was finally able to get this out. :)
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Jada68 says:Posted: 31 Jul 08During the course of my dating years, I've dated outside of my race...well honestly, because I was not raised to judge someone on the color of skin more so of what kind of character they are. I eventually married a white man. He was very open minded,cultured, funny. It was unreal the disapproving stares from both of our races. You would like to think society has changed.In the end though he was NOT Mr.RIGHT despite him being Mr.White. I think that some black men do date women outside of their race as some trophy wife (Tiger,Kobe...)when you see a couple, especially an interracial one you can tell (at least I can) as to why they are together love,common interest etc.or if he is doing it cause he wants society's approval that he is a successful man. If the couple is of the latter option, I have no respect of them. I have seen fine black men with some of the trashest and nasty white/asian women just so they can say they are with that race of woman. So now they have "arrived" and can portray a "successful"black man. I.E. Tiger and Kobe etc. Now that pisses me off to no end. The gentlemen that has the japanese girlfriend...you know what your intentions and reason are for being with her. Never mind others thoughts. There will always be haters on one issue or another. In the end, I am not seeking a certain race but I am for sure seeking a certain quality of man. These days the white men are stepping forward, quickly. I look at like this may the best man win.
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seancarter03 says:Posted: 28 Jul 08
Airman I agree with you brother and to be honest I never thought about that mother comment as a reason as to why some of us don't usually date women of our own culture. Yeah the idea of dating someone who reminds me of my mom is not hot at all, I never understood the whole dating people who reminded you of your parents, maybe characteristics such as strength, intelligence, and tenacity but looking at another shorty Jamaican woman who says my name the way my mom says my name is a little disturbing. I also agree with you when you say a lot of black women act like there aren't good black men out there but I think a lot of women and men are way too easy to give up or unwilling to try things outside of their comfort zone. Again I wanted to commend you on your comment.
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TheAirman says:Posted: 26 Jul 08
There is a double-standard and I think that Black Women as a whole need to admit that. I left Japan a few months ago. I did a two-year tour there for the Air Force. My girlfriend, with whom I still share a relationship, is Japanese. Why? Because there are more Japanese women in Japan than Black women, or American women for that matter. However, to one particular single mother, I was dating her because I did not like to date someone who looks like my mother, or some nonsense to that effect. I was unwilling to date someone with my skin tone. And there's the discrepancy. Whenever a Black man dates someone who isn't black, he is a sell out. He is taking her as a trophy. He is "self-hating". But whenever a Black woman dates outside of her race, it is ALWAYS because there are no good Black men left; as if we've all just vanished into thin f'ing air. That is the biggest insult to Black Men. That, along with perpetuating hte myth that there are more of us in jail and on the streets than in the workforce or in college. Well, if some of you are really "not attracted" to us at large, then don't slander us with completely false statistics. Don't get mad at us when we walk away from you all. But what do I know? It's not like anyone is going to listen to what a Black Man has to say; not one that tells it like it is, anyway.
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newyorkgirl says:Posted: 08 Jul 08
What is "Christian" about racism poetlove? I have the read the Bible cover to cover. Please quote the verse that states that racism is correct.
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poetlove says:Posted: 06 Jul 08
I'm torn on this one, as I try to be as modern and uphold my Christian religion. It's at times disturbing seeing a black women with a white guy. I don't know if it's psychological or what but it'll get to you. I personally have only hung out with white women no real dating, except back in high school. So I don't think I fall into the hypocrite category until I date somebody but anyway it's still disturbing
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Posted: 04 Jun 08
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HereIambaby says:Posted: 29 Feb 08there is no guarantee on marriage. it's something of a risk and something we have to prepare ourselves for. Maybe the problem of marriages not succeeding is because the people involved do not know themselves and the other person's background enough. I mean, isn't it important to have someone who suits you and your ways ? And that person might be from your culture or another one. At the same time, cultures do have dominant characteristics, like some cultures are quiet and gentle and others are a bit tough (in their ways) so if for example you're a sensitive person you'd have to go for the person and the 'culture' that coincides with you.There are some good interracial dating sites, such as Blackcentury.com. Maybe you can have a try on it.
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CaribPrinces says:Posted: 27 Feb 08
To phatkitty, To answer your question...yes...I would pass up a good man based on his social background or lack of white color job because for me he needs to have BOTH a white color job AND a good social background in order to be a GOOD MAN. So therefore, he needs to be the right color AND wear the right collar. By the way love your play on words it works well in this situation. Cheers!
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Member says:Posted: 26 Feb 08
The folk here in the uk are not quite as leberal here yet, for one thing we have a large Asian communities spaced around the UK, and asian culture may not always mix with western culture, I dont think the younger generation have any big issues with interracial dating but more so the older generation other subsets of society
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Member says:Posted: 26 Feb 08
The folk here in the UK are not quite as liberal yet, for one thing we have large Asian communities spaced around the UK, and Asian culture may not always mix with western culture, I don’t think the younger generation have any big issues with interracial dating but more so the older generation and other subsets of society
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Sunshine says:Posted: 21 Jan 08
I love this movie. I saw it with a girlfriend of mine(who is white). She said I was just like the main character. My friend tells me I never look outside the box. I have my specific list of what I want in a man but when I meet someone he never has any qualities that is on my list. So after I saw this movie I threw away the list. I am letting go and letting love flow! Where are all the single white men in Washington?
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phatkitty says:Posted: 02 Jan 08
Personally, i saw the movie at the theatre and i bought it on DVD as well; because i really enjoyed it a lot. And i supported it because it was written, directed and produced by an all women team. Need i say more? It was light and comical in some aspects and in other areas, makes you rethink your beliefs and pre-conceived ideas about interracial topics. Will some of us past up a good man based on his lack of a white collar job or social background. He might not wear the right "COLLAR" but he could be the right COLOR. I know, i know, it's a bit corny, but true. Think on that ladies.
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CaribPrinces says:Posted: 23 Nov 07
IT'S ABOUT TIME HOLLYWOOD DID A MOVIE LIKE THIS. HOLLYWOOD NEEDS TO WAKE UP AND SMELL THE COFFEE. THEY CAN ONLY HIDE THE REAL;ITY THAT WHITE MEN HAVE BEEN CHASING BLACK WOMEN FOR CENTURIES FOR ONLY SO LONG. LETS JUST GET IT ALL OUT IN THE OPEN. WHO EVER DON'T WANT TO SEE IT DON'T HAVE TO GO! THERE SHOULD BE MORE MOVIES LIKE THIS.
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I dont know about most people but I am from the south.My ancestors was more thna likely on the next row over from a black slave.I have never seen the difference.I trusted a black male in combat as I did a white.A lot of times more.