Black women on interracial unions
We have seen the rise in of interracial relationships over the past twenty-five years but still there are any people who remain harsh critics of mixed unions.
Find your soulmate on InterracialDatingCentral
Before - in the middle of the Twentieth Century - parents of Caucasian women seemed to be heavily against the idea of an interracial relationship. Now, with the Twenty-First Century here, it kinda seems as though African-American are against such marital union … with stories of them being against unions between Black men and White Women.
Do African American women really despise African American men who date Caucasian women?
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65 responses to "Black women on interracial unions"
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Comeready says:Posted: 19 Jun 09
Jerk or not it is truth and many whites like you don't want to here it, what good is a black man who abandons his race, his children and his mother for the oppressor and their children, it worse than being a oppressor.
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TheGirl says:Posted: 14 Jun 09
I hate to jump into this conversation so late in the game but I had to comment. Someone on here mentioned that they would like an opinion from a white person, so here I am. I will start by saying that I am 100% white (not even a tan lol) and my boyfriend is a gorgeous dark-skinned Jamaican man. We get the stares and comments, but oddly enough, ONLY from black people. We have seen black women shake their heads at us and black men tell him that he is playing on the wrong side and this and that. Now I want to add that this happens in a rather low-class neighborhood, so I dont want this to seem like a racial thing, when to me, it is more of a class thing. I am not really sure why black people have such a problem with it, if they even do, but I think maybe it just comes across as awkward. I am not toothless, fat and ugly. In fact I am actually really pretty (not to toot my own horn) and I fell for this Jamaican guy because of who he was, not because of race. I honestly didn't realize the issues it would cause until I was already involved. I have yet to meet his mother because he thinks she might have a problem with it, even though both my white parents say they have no problem with it at all. Very interesting. But I think people stare mostly because he is so dark and I am so light that it is very eye-catching. I often wonder if we were to have children, how the racial issues would affect him/her. That scares me. and to the guy on here who said any black man who dates outside his race is worthless...is a racist jerk!
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prettybrowneyes says:Posted: 26 Mar 09
I have never depised blackmen for dating whitewomen, in fact, I never cared...I mean why should I when I prefer and date whitemen?
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ShellyPoo says:Posted: 11 Jan 09First I would like to say that I date all races. I am VERY HAPPY that I've opened up my dating scope to include men of other races because I've met a lot of very interesting men that I would have missed out on if I had kept limiting myself only to Black men. With that said,I think that bdsista hit the nail on the head. I don't think that Black women ever "despised" Black men, but it is VERY hurtful to to a sista when the brotha she has been devoted to treats her like crap and then starts dating a White woman who has less to offer him AND keeps up a lot of drama like a queen. And, to make matters worse alot of brothas who exclude Black women from their dating pool do so for some very superficial reasons. Here are some of the reasons that several brothas I know told me they don't date Black women: -They don't want dark skinned kids - they want "pretty" babies. -White women give them money whenever they want it. -They like White hair better than Black hair. -White women expect them to "do stuff" - White women don't expect anything. Now, these are the most ridiculous of the reasons that I've heard. But I agree with bdsista that it is self-hatred. I went on a date with a very handosme Black corporate attorney (who pursued me). The date was perfect by anyone's standards until the very end when he said to me "too bad you're not White." Not only was I insulted, but I was very confused - HE pursued ME, HE asked ME out on a date. He tried to explain himself, but there was really no explanation he could give to justify that statement. That is when I decided to expand my dating pool to include men from other races. I still date Black men as well, but if I get a sense that they has skin color issues, or they're only interested in me because they think I can pass for mixed, or somthing other than Black (yes, this has happened to me too), then I AM OUT. You should date someone for WHO THEY ARE NOT WHAT COLOR THEY ARE.
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BeeGabs says:Posted: 07 Jan 09I'm not bothered by race anymore. In the past, I would be slightly annoyed if I saw a decent black man with a white woman: not aggresively angry, just a nasty little worm in the back of my mind that he should be with a sista. As I've matured and been exposed to people of all types, to me it's more important to be with the person that truly makes you happy!
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BeeGabs says:Posted: 07 Jan 09
For most of my life, I've been invisible to black men. I dated, married and divorced a black man. He wasn't a thug, drug dealer, etc. He seemed to be a white man in black face (lol). After my divorce, during my 30's, I couldn't pay a brother to date me! White men were far more attracted to me. However, now that I'm in my 40's, it seems to be young brothers have "discovered" me. I'm just trying to figure out what the heck I'm going to do with a 26-year old!
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bdsista says:Posted: 07 Jan 09Pineapple has it right, it goes to Black women being raised to be loyal to Black men and the concept of raising a Black family. Since historically the survival of Black families has been the mission of Black women. I think the biggest think that triggers the anger of most Black women (not you all on this site) when they see a Black man with a white woman, is related to their experiences with Black men and how many times you will see Black men treat white women better than a black woman who has more to offer. I find it really problematic when a person refuses to date their own race, I don't consider it a preference, I consider it self hatred. On another blog, a guy posted that its a red flag to him when someone says they won't date their own race. That's like rejecting your parents and your family. If you like the opposite sex, then be open to all people of the opposite sex that you find compatible, but Black women are women and will respond to positive loving men.
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876pineapple says:Posted: 20 Dec 08I have no problem with African American men dating Caucasian women. I prefer dating Caucasian men myself, but for a long time black women “Did” despise black men for dating white women; reason being, black women have always been loyal to black men, and some still are. But I glad to see black women are finally opening up to dating other race of men.
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NYCOACO says:Posted: 26 Oct 08
I have read everyone comment some I agree with and some I don't, but I have dated Italian men and was friend with one for 10 years, his attitude towards was different to my ex-husband for 25 yrs. My ex was not nice, but these men was nice to me. I did experience looks from the brothers on the street, more than the ladies. I find more W/H men willing to talk to me than blacks. My first encounter with then is my personality that draw them to me, then there is sometimes the crap they do and can't handle me and leave. I let them know I don't play games. At present moment I am seeing an Italian guy which I met on this site and is very happy with him. We met once and have been talking on line and on the phone until late in the am. He likes me very much and wants us to continuing been friends, then see where it lead to, but I am happy to say go with your heart and things will fall in place.
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tatted2death says:Posted: 16 Oct 08Those are some very interesting observations, blubronxtail.....I tend to have some of the same issues. I am VERY warm and accepting when I encounter black male/white female couples but the tension is usually so thick you can barely breathe without it being misinterpreted as some sort of jealousy. I still try and be cordial and understanding because on one hand I can relate. Interracial relationship are still somewhat taboo and you just don't know who you might encounter and what internal issues they might have. So yes, ALL interracial couples at sometime or another are going to come off as a bit cautious/anxious about being in public. I have noticed things but I NEVER get confrontational...if anything I just flash a little cat-that-swallowed-canary smile and carry on. NO ONE can intimidate me into to not loving who I choose to love....PERIOD.
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blubronxtail says:Posted: 16 Oct 08
Hey I love this topic but I'm curious as to why it's only going in one direction "Black women having a problem with a Black Man dating a White woman"?. I have dated all races and I must admit I haven't been with a black man since I was 16. I'm originally from NY and I love all races. The funny thing is that I have seen black men with white women and it doesnt bother me at all. Actually I'm really happy to see them and usually smile because it's an expression of my own interests and tastes. However I have noticed that either the white woman they are with tries to really get in my face or even the black man tries to show me. They may bump me or try to talk loud to get my attention. The funny thing is they are usually not attractive at all. The black man is usually hideous and the white woman is usually someone that would be looked over by other white men. So ugly is with ugly.. why would that bother me. Usually they'll see me with a hot white male and that's when the attitude really shows up. I usually smile at them to show my harmlessness and acceptance of their happy union but that smile is never reciprocated or instead invokes rolling of the eyes or someone looking at me up and down. Now think about it a white man and a black woman walking past a group of black men. It's almost as if you feel like you're going to be stabbed or beaten to death. I have noticed men I've dated almost scared that they will not make it home alive just by being with me. Or usually a group of black males will yell out rude and racial comments just to make a statement. It's horrible. In worse cases they may beat you down. Atleast I have heard of this happening before. I'm shocked that this wasnt turned in the opposite direction because it's alot more dangerous when a black man sees a black woman with a white man. My mother has gone throught the same thing or worse. I even had a man who was going to fight me and my man on a train just because of our union. Ask this of any race. Usually the men of the race that see their women with another race are the one's that get upset. They may sleep with women of different races but let one of their sisters come home with a race other than their own and all hell breaks loose. Ohh and if you've watched the lastest Chris Rock Special he touches on that topic too. He jokes on how a black woman will date hot white men but black men are not picky at all. That they'll date any white woman. I'm not saying this is true but I have yet to see a really handsome black man with a gorgeous white woman in real life. Maybe in entertainment or the media but not in passing. I feel be with who you want to be with, that's kinda why we're all on this site.
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ellec says:Posted: 22 Sep 08
For me it is not that I oppose it so much as the attitude of black men who date white women. When they see a black women tehre is a look of almost guilt and the white woman looks as if they are either jealous or entitled. I believe if we have made these choices as somone stated in their post earlier, then embrace it to the fullest.
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alexx78 says:Posted: 10 Aug 08WELL, I AM DEFINATELY GLAD TO SEE THAT WE CAN FINALLY TALK ABOUT THESE ISSUE OPENLY. AS A BLACK WOMAN I HAVE DATED WHITE, LATIN, ITALIAN, CAMBODIAN AND BLACK MEN, AND IN MY EXPERIENCES MEN ARE MEN. I HAVE GOTTEN SLACK FROM MY OWN PEOPLE FROM TIME TO TIME, BUT I WAS RAISED AND EXPOSED TO MANY RACES, AND ALSO HAVE MY OWN PREFERENCE. I DO NOT DEFINE MY PRIDE IN MY PEOPLE, HERITAGE AND CULTURE BY WHO I DATE, NOR DO I TAKE IT TO HEART WHEN SOME PEOPLE WITHIN OR OUTSIDE MY RACE AGREE OR DISAGREE. I HOLD NO ISSUES TOWARDS BLACK MEN DATING WHITE WOMEN, ASIAN ECT.. THOUGH I DO RECOGNIZE AND RELATE TO THE FACT AS A BLACK WOMAN WHEN YOU SEE A BLACK MAN WITH A WHITE WOMAN, SOME OF US DO QUESTION WHY? THERE ALOT OF BLACK MEN WHO DATE WHITE WOMEN FOR MANY DIFFERENT REASONS, FOR INSTANCE IN MY OWN FAMILY MOST OF MY ADULT MALE COUSINS DATE,MARRIED OR PREFER WHITE OR HISPANIC WOMEN.THEY HAVE ALL BEEN RAISED BY STRONG EDUCATED BLACK MOTHERS, MY ISSUE IS THAT WHILE THEY CAN DO THEIR THING, THEY CAN'T SEEM TO HANDLE I MYSELF DATING A WHITE MAN, AND HAVE COME DOWN ON ME WITH STATEMENTS LIKE,THEY ONLY WANT TO USE YOU, YOUR TOKEN BLACK DREAM, A FETISH ECT.. I STAND UP FOR MYSELF, BECAUSE EVERYONE HAS THERE OWN PERSONAL ISSUES WITH RACE, SOME MIGHT COME FROM DISAPPOINTMENT AT YOUNG AGE, LACK OF A BLACK MALE ROLE MODEL ECT.. WHATEVER THE REASONS MAY BE. I REFUSE TO ALLOW ANYONE'S ISSUES OR OPINIONS TO KEEP ME FROM BEING HAPPY IN LIFE AND LOVE. I KNOW WHO I AM AS A WOMAN FIRST, WHO HAPPENS TO BE BLACK WITH A MIXED BACKGROUND OR HERITAGE. I AM PROUD OF WHO I AM AND WORK ON MYSELF EVERYDAY, PERSONALLY, SPIRITUALLY ECT.. SO I TRULY BELIEVE THAT PEOPLE HAVE THEIR OWN PATHS TO FOLLOW AND WISH THEM THE BEST IN LOVE, LIFE AND HAPPINESS.
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yryrizaaol says:Posted: 10 Aug 08The way some of the black men write their answers here, it sounds as if the white women are getting the raw deal. Try learning how to write in English, especially since it's the only language you know, if you want to even consider that knowing it.
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severs6 says:Posted: 08 Aug 08a friend hes white man and he lost his white lady and she get all and now hes with a black woman and i have never seen him this happy, and now thay have there kids , and are doing well ,as for me im a native and i dont date whites i can be freinds only , and thay are so different then the sis, if could come to my home i could show you what im sating right out my window and can go to noe and some days she well talk to me and the next not say a nothing to me even if i say hi, but when she need some thing she comes to me then and when it time to pay i dont see her know you know why my people dont like them
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allura58 says:Posted: 07 Aug 08
I have come to the conclusion that it is chemistry, character, and commitment to a person that counts the most. My question that I have not been able to get an answer to is this. One man did admit that earlier in his life it was fear that prevented him from marrying a black woman.The question is why is it that early on in a white man's life, he marries a white woman, has children, his home, etc. Then after the marriage is over, the wife gets the house, he comes to the realization that he has always been attracted to the black woman and finds them the most sensual of all. Now he has no home, children are gone, and he resorts to his passion and self realization of wanting only a black woman. Meanwhile , now he has few possessions, no home, not too much to offer a black woman that is wife material. I hope I can get an answer.
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Michele50 says:Posted: 06 Aug 08
I have read most of your comments and they all have valid points. I am a single black female and I'm new to the internet dating. I have been approached by more white men than black and it's ok. We can't be upset because of who people are attracted too. I have never really dated white men, and I do want something new. I would love the experience. I lived in California for seven wonderful years and they are more diversed there for more interacial relationships. My daughter is dating a white man now, and she said she will never date another black man ever again. So to each his own. What ever floats your boat. I have noticed that the reason why a lot of black woman are not dating is because they only want to date a man because of what he has, or his bank account. Or you have to look like a thug. Except the person for who they are and don't try and change them. Stop giving them so much drama, my God it's ridiculous and ladies learn how to love yourself first before you try and love someone else. Thank you for listening. Michele50
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MiamiQ says:Posted: 20 Jul 08I come from an African American family who have married Caucasian, Puerto rican, Iranian,Cuban, Buddhist, Muslim and whomever else our family prefers to marry or date. We have learned to love and accept ourselves and one another transcending all differences. We don't have time or energy to be haters. Its all about the love.
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Ginuwine_ty says:Posted: 19 Jul 08
I hear what you're saying Comeready but I can't feel that. I'm not sure what part of the country you're from but it's not like that all over. I lived in the East coast and yeah, it was pretty much the way you're speaking. I moved out West and it's all good out here. I wish the rest of the country was like that but like life it gets better over time. I have no issues with my balck community out here. People are people and color/race is something your born with. It shouldn't dictate you worth or the lifestlye or who you belong to. America has it's issues and I pray, most of them heal themselves before my time is up and my kids grow in a better world when color is only mentioned in a box of Crayola 64 crayons.
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comeready says:Posted: 17 Jul 08
comeready here, I was fascinated by the variety of responses to my comments. I appreciate the openmindness that some people spoke with, I realize that my thoughts are and can be considered extreme; people become afraid to express what they really feel because it not popular opinion or not considered politically correct so we swallow our truth. Black men who date outside of their race are worth so so much less outside the race than in. Absolutely they are worth more to the white women and their children that they are supporting, sure; but to the black race they are worthless or nothing at all.
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Ginuwine_ty says:Posted: 14 Jul 08
Sunsmiler....Omg!That was the best way to put all of this to rest. Comeready, I feel your pain, but like Sunsmiler said, there is no pure race but human. Just because someone shares your skin color doesn't automatically mean that you have to be with them. Love is....well love.
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Linda says:Posted: 14 Jul 08
I dont understand how people can judge anyone by the color of their skin. I am white female from sweden almost in my 50ths. Before i married I date all kind of men because of who they where not picking them because they where dark,red,light,white or what ever. If the vibes are right and the other person treat me right go for it.It is people who is ignorent and dont know better who has a problem with it. I married a man from Puerto-Rico we have 3 beutiful children and no problems at all. Loving someone do not have to do with race or color. It just make the world beutiful. And so much more interesting,but in the States there is alot of hate sometimes.
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severs6 says:Posted: 14 Jul 08
im love all not just one race if eny one would be like that shoud be the indians and you dont here them ,saying a lot of bad thing and i not like tht at all im black foot and white more black foot then white,AND I CARE FOR ALL , AND WE NEED TO GET A LONG TO LIVE AND BE HAPPY IN ARE LIFE I LIKE TO BE FRIENDS WITH ALL KEITH
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poetlove says:Posted: 14 Jul 08Sunsmiler that was very heartfelt, and comeready I feel you on some levels I just thought the worthless part was a little harsh. I mean as a performer anything in my community I do is free. I offer my considerable talents to any organization trying revitalize any form of our life freely. So I do feel you on the community part, as far as dating somebody has to be very charming for me to even honestly acknowledge them outside my race.
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Sunsmiler says:Posted: 13 Jul 08
Comeready, I read your post in June, but did not respond initially. Your comments were direct, heartfelt and eloquent, but I honestly felt that your message did not warrant a response. After reading the other respondents' messages, I reassessed my thoughts of you and your opinion/outlook, but respectfully realize that some of our viewpoints are different. You (and others) have made some interesting (and unfortunate) comments about the black family (and lack thereof in terms of percentages). I can not speak for all black women, but (as a black woman) it does hurt to see "our" communities suffering (financially/economically, emotionally, educationally and in other ways). I do my part by volunteering and strategically working within the educational field in "urban" schools. I realize that we all have a responsibility and proactively we can take part in the solution, but not to our detriment. Basically, what I mean is, I will give of my time, money and energy (hard work) to make a difference, but leave me the hell alone when it comes to my personal life and the person(s) whom I choose to date. Even if the statistics were different and there were loads of educated, cultured and confident black men I would STILL choose to date men of various shades...why? I was brought up in a Jamaican West Indian family (mixed with various backgrounds) and throughout my numerous travels there, I have always been exposed to a multicultural environment. When Jamaicans marry Jamaicans that have Chinese, Caucasian, Indian and African descent, we don't say that is marrying "outside" of the race...it is simply marrying another Jamaican. Although I was born in this country (America) I can not understand the ignorance of all skin colors to have friends and date those that only resemble you. Remember, globally this mentality does not exist to the extent you describe. When it come down to it...WE ARE ALL MIXED. NO ONE IS PURE ANYTHING, but human being. With that said, I am still cognizant of all the "isms" (racism, sexism, homophobism, ageism, etc...) globally. Please mind your words when spewing negativity (i.e. worthless men). You appear very hurt and/or personally unhappy and your pain is being directed in a way that should represent the eloquent, caring and concerned person you really are. Some people have commented that they don't see race or skin color)... I do. Being brought up in this country and the institutionalizing of labels and the "isms", it is nearly impossible not to see it. It is how we deal with it that matters. Thank you all for listening and sharing and most of all thank you Comeready for "putting yourself out there" by encouraging dialogue among us.
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severs6 says:Posted: 11 Jul 08
im mix and i have been with all of them . and i dont see the color has eny thing to do with love ,if god put us all here to love each other, to be happy in life so why is it bad, i love all colors.i was with a black lady and love her , she past a way and i could seen me with her for life keith
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seancarter03 says:Posted: 10 Jul 08
I am really loving this site, it's the first time I've seen so many people talk about this kind of thing, I wish more "white" people would give opinions on these kind of topics, haven't seen it too much in here. First thing is first for all of you who can not string together a coherent sentence together should think twice about putting up your opinion because your credibility is quickly dismissed, you know who you are. Truthfully speaking I don't have too many friends who date exclusively within in their race. I was fortunate enough to grow up in an environment where I saw many people dating other people of all ethnicities. I don't understand why what another person finds attractive is so threatening to someone else its not like if I wasn't dating the person they saw me with that I would be dating some more acceptable to a complete stranger. I as a "black" man find all types of women attractive but for me as a individual some of my interests are more enjoyed by people who are white and that's how I decide who I date. Common interests, some of you might think that your skin tone defines you and that's your choice but I choose to define myself by my actions. Thats why I put the racial terms we have grown up with in quotation marks because its not real. Its all a social construct that we keep on passing on from generation. Did anyone here even notice race as a child, I bet not, its not until an adult taught you about it that you noticed it. I know with those of us classified as "black" we are a lot more racially aware because we are reminded of it more so than other people on this planet but I do think we can choose. Its like if someone calls you beautiful or ugly, its not real for you until you own it and I for one choose not to own it any longer. We are people plain and simple, the most genetically similar creatures on the planet. We can live off each others organs, blood, even bone marrow so why can't we see past the limitations of our forefathers?
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e-dub says:Posted: 10 Jul 08
Dear Group; No person is "worthless" that implies that person is no more then a walking talking cockroach and isn't entitled to any human diginity.
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ginuwine_ty says:Posted: 10 Jul 08Comeready, I wish I could agree with you but I can't. Worthless? Really? I date who wants to date me. I don't see color. I see a woman. I like women and why should I care what color she is. What? To please you? I don't think so. If a beautiful black woman came and hollered at me I would holla back. I don't pick and choose,I have standards and if she doesn't meet those standards, just like any other woman...they gets no love over here. The world is mixed way before we started to recognize it. So what if our kids are mixed they have two or three cultures to have. they aren't stuck in a box and labled. They can experience the world with all the drama a single has had to. I have two beautiful kids(Black,white and asian).Are you tripping on Mariah Carey, Halley Berry, Derek Jeter, Lenny Kravitv?
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almondjoy11 says:Posted: 09 Jul 08I don't agree with all that comeready stated, but I will agree that there's a "watering down" of the black culture when (some)interracial children are raised as "mixed" or "biracial," not identifying with either race. These are not ethnicities. Anyone heard of the federal five? Look at any job/college application. More often, the children are raised to identify with one culture and /or are confused because their outward appearance says otherwise. There is usually a preference to relate to the race that is socially more acceptable. Look at Tiger Woods. Who ever heard of coblanasian? He's Black! This has a lot to do with racism and the fact that blacks were historically mistreated in america (MLK was assassinated 40 yrs ago-not so long ago. He made interracial dating more accepted). Many (not all)Black men who date outside their race would have to be honest with themselves to admit that they may have some issues with their own identity if they ONLY PREFER to date outside their race. I know BW who have dated BM, WM and HM. I'm an equal opportunist. Man is man. As an independent, black woman with a nice career, I'm "open" to dating other races, even though I haven't done so. And will admit that it is very difficult to date black men when you throw class/ income/gender preference into the equation, but those are significant factors that limit the number in the dating field and color isn't one of them. One of the previous response said it best, "Love is colorless."
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poetlove says:Posted: 29 Jun 08
Comeready I whole heartedly disagree with the last line, A black man that dates anything other than black is not worthless. I spent about 24 years of my life only dating black and don't get it twisted it was great. I'm a traveling Spoken Word artist and the one time I went to my home venue, and took a Claire Danes lookalike, no toothless or fat and greasy, maybe a little artsy. The sisters were in an uproar, but I noticed the only sisters with a problem was the ones who wouldn't give me the time of day before. Now it's an issue and they're saying what's wrong with me, "nothing besides they didn't pay me any mind until I brought Bethany around". That's the flip side to white girls taking all the good black men. Did you want or value them when they were trying to talk to you. I was established before dating a white, Educated, Own business + touring Poet, decent credit, so a white women doesn't make you a man if you were already one before meeting her
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comeready says:Posted: 28 Jun 08
okay first things first, several of the ladies talked about how smart, talent, beautiful ( I assume they mean physically that they are) and other positive charcateristic when pondering why they are overlooked by black men,do we really think that the problems lie with ourselves (as so many would like to believe)? What is the black man standards when choosing a women to date,look at the white women black men are dating and that should and your question, fat, greasy, toothless and just plain nasty looking so it not about black men standard of beauty, cleanliness or smarts they are apparently quite low. Second point, black women keep saying "I really don't care" well you just ought to, look at the stats, quickest rising population of prisoners black women, fastest rising population of drug users black women, aids black women and so on, a sistah can only take so much before she loses her mind, no king no kindgom things crumble. It not just about us a individual women it about the profound, devastating impact that black men abandonment is having on the race as a whole, we are a disappearing people, it not about sex, companionship, it about black men racing their own black children by the way in the US what race of children are being adopted most outside of their race more than any other BLACK CHILDREN. So we are literally losing our culture, its value, not much is being put back into the race as a whole to revitalize it. It not about anger, hatred, jealous as some many would like to reduce it to it'S about a lost people. How can you say it doesn't matter, when black men are raising and providing for white women and their children and our own are without. It amazing when black men especially those that has 900 children, get with a white women and all of a sudden they are the guy from father no best, he it a the library, the y, riding bike, throwing balls no 40 ounce in site ( ya'll not trying to hear me) so you can continue to play all open minded and politically correct if you want to, but a black man that dates anything other than black is WORTHLESS!
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poetlove says:Posted: 22 Jun 08
I have certainly undergone some new things since the last time I was on here. I recently became friends with lots of hippies and their concept of peace and love is kinda breathtaking. I'm not into the whole psychedelic drug thing, but there's commune's where the only time race is mentioned is who can make it from apple tree to apple tree fastest. With that being said it takes more than one trip or community to erase the years of pain and affliction caused due to race, but we can only take one step at a time
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e-dub says:Posted: 20 Jun 08
This question can be broken down into a couple of parts: 1) Black Women who opposed to "race" mixing. I'm not sure how realistic this is in the good ole USA but to each their own. 2) As perceived snub of black women. Then it becomes a matter of intent was it just one of those things that happened in which case a-okay. However, if it was I won't date black women or any women who has to straighten her hair that comes under the head line of just asking for it.
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ginuwine_ty says:Posted: 02 Jun 08
Helloitsme is right on the money. I couldn't agree with you more. I had to start laughing out loud because I've seen it too. Queenbee40 has a good point too. I wish peeps would just let other folks be. Like I tell my sisters out here, stop settling for almosts and wanna be's, thugs, and criminals. Break the stereo types that's placed upon you and stop waiting for that "good man" to come to you. Go get him,life's a competition and if don't get him someone else will...
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helloitsme83 says:Posted: 02 Jun 08Love has nothing to do with color. It has been stated and stated and stated over and over again and it is the truth. Truth be told, it's only a minority of Black Women that truly despise BM/WF relationships. In my experience and research, they are upset because they went after the 'roughneck' and thought they could change him. And now, usually 2 kids later, they want a 'good' man. They see such man with a white woman or a woman of any other race for that matter and all of a sudden he was stolen. 9/10 it was some kat she didn't want in the beginning. She threw him away in other words. How in the world is something stolen from you if you threw it away? This can work both ways as well. I've seen kats act this way over a BF/WM relationship. I've seen it with my own eyes. Some people have waaaay too many racial hangups.
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queenbee40 says:Posted: 28 May 08Too much already. What's wrong with this picture? I am a black woman with all the qualities. I am Smart, great career, independent, attractive and friendly among all others. Since I've been single, not even once have I had a black man approached me or even wanted to date me. I found that most white men are attracted to man and asked me out most of the time. and they seemed to treat me with lots of respect. So, I don't care what ethnic group you belong to, as long as I am being treated with respect and dignity..
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queenbee40 says:Posted: 28 May 08
Too much already. What's wrong with this picture? I am a black woman with all the qualities. I am Smart, great career, independent, attractive and friendly among all others. Since I've been single, not even once have I had a black man approached me or even want to date me. I found that most white men are attracted to man and asked me out most of the time. and they seemed to treat me with lots of respect. So, I don't care what ethnic group you belong to, as long as I am being treated with respect and dignity..
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ozibornmale says:Posted: 19 May 08
did anyone else read the posts on the article the had on bossip recently? talk about a wide mix of emotions.. http://www.bossip.com/16252/they-jacked-our-lingo/
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Radiantsmiler says:Posted: 16 May 08
Well said my brothers. I appreciate all your sincere viewpoints! Ideally and realistically we are all human; I just wish that we were able to live that way daily in our society.
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ginuwine_ty says:Posted: 16 May 08
Poetlove, I do understand where you are coming from. I've felt what you have felt when I was a younger man. I felt when I saw a white man with a black women, it made me feel like we as black men have failed or wasn't good enough to be with that woman. I see now that love really shouldn't have a color attached to it. We are all the same except for the shade of our skin. Peoples motives are their own and I have to respect whatever they chose. To me it's fine that other races mingle together because last time I checked we are all the same race anyway...Human.
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poetlove says:Posted: 15 May 08
Personally I date only black women because there's nothing mor beautiful on this planet. I come across a lot of sisters who get sick in the stomach seeing black and white couples. I have come a long way but still don't like it. With that being said i'm good friends with a white girl who only dates bros, so in her dating situations i'm nowhere around. Seeing a beautiful sister with a white guy kinda geys to me but I suppress those emotions due to being an entrepenuer and touring poet
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Bronx347 says:Posted: 20 Apr 08
GENERALLY speaking, it's true that Black women DO care about the issue and, for the most part, are generally opposed. Let's not kid ourselves, folks. Sure, we can play the "ain't me" game all day long, but let's face it, you peruse ANY blog/msg board geared towards Blacks, particularly Black women, you will EVENTUALLY find (without even having to fuss with the search engine) at least one heavily posted thread dealing with the subject; and bank on more than just a few greasy comments about BM/WW. And let's not forget that it's part of the Big 3, the factors as to why a "Good Black Man" is impossible to find. To review: In jail/DL/White Woman. Am I imagining all this?
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Ginuwine_ty says:Posted: 15 Apr 08
Sunsmiler...You are right. It is some black women, not all. Sorry that I generalized. I see that all races have an issue with someone dating "outside" their race. I was just answering the question that was posed.I really wish that people didn't see color but that would be a perfect world then huh? If people just sadi that they had a preference maybe that would be easier to accept. Oh by the way the name not misspelled, it's a nickname and nicknames have no correct spelling...really.
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Sunsmiler says:Posted: 15 Apr 08
Genuine, sorry to misspell your name I have an issue with incorrect grammar, please refer to your post to SOME BLACK women as the complainers. I, for one, don't complain...or care if black men date women of other colors. Women (people) of other races (beside black) also have issues with "their" men dating outside the race... I know, I have experienced it. I don't concentrate on it because I have more important things to do...like go to bed. Good night.
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Ginuwine_Ty says:Posted: 15 Apr 08
I never wanted admit it but I thinks it's true to a certain extent. Black woman complain about all the white women are taking their men and leaving them with the thugs and dealers and scrubs. That's not true. I have lived out here on the West coast and I gets no love.I am a very good looking man with a great career and drama free and good credit. I guess that's not attractive or they are scared of that and they go back to what's comfortable. I love black women, all women really (lol), but only white and hispanic women see me. They are not afraid and know what they want. Even if it's a black man. Like I told my sister, get with the program and stop settling for the uneducated and unmotivated fellas. Upgrade to what you want. Peace.
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Sunsmiler says:Posted: 14 Apr 08
As a black woman, I don't mind when black men date white women. Besides, who am I to talk when I typically date men of various skin colors. I moved to a less diverse area in New York and most of the men that ask me out are white men, but I have experienced indifference from white women. I am so tired of people questioning if black women "despise" black men. Firstly, that reference (despise)is too strong (over exaggerated)and perhaps that question should be posed to other races too(not on this site of course:-)
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LApete says:Posted: 09 Apr 08
I dont care,it's my choice as to who i date or dont date nothing against other woman or men,be happy with the one you love stop worring about the next person if your in a good relathionship be happy that your not a lone a night like many others are because they want let someone in because of the color of their skin,i want trade my happyness for that.
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JohnDConkera says:Posted: 08 Apr 08
Ooooh. There's such a fun mix of issues with that question. Pretty much most - if not all - of them revolve around sexual stereotypes. "Do African American women really despise African American men who date Caucasian women?" Ahem. Those ladies who are upset with African American men dating Caucasian women should date me (just for comparative purposes, of course :-)
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