Swirling by Christelyn Karazin

The art of attraction isn't just about colour or creed, it's about chemistry and a whole bunch of other things. Swirling author Christelyn Karazon discusses.

QOTW: "I Feel Threatened By Asian Women."

Posted by Christelyn, 01 Aug 17

The Question:

Dear Christelyn,

I first off would love to thank you for the channel! I wish there was a woman like you when I was a young girl. you embody everything I want to be as a woman. I am young 21-year-old black woman. Going to university I started to embrace my own beauty and finally came to the conclusion that black is the epitome of beauty. However, as you mentioned previously a lot of black women feel threatened by the white woman and mixed/biracial black women. I on the hand have always felt slightly threatened by East Asian women. For the following reasons:

Your perfect partner could be online right now...

What are you looking for?

  • They are hyper-feminized, ( black women are not)
  • They are the most sought after women, and dating websites proves this ( black women are the least)
  • They tend to be on the petite side and thus can be cutesy, ( whereas I’m tall and slender at 5 ft 10 inches)
  • I am most interested in white men, but they seem to prefer East Asian women much more, I just feel that every time I engage a white man, I have to worry about them liking them over me
  • I know too many men that have that ” Asian Fetish” and to tell you the truth, I am jealous, I am jealous of their desirability.
  • Christelyn, I was with a man that admitted to me ( after we were intimate with each other) that he too had the fetish for Asian women, it broke my heart, my self-esteem took a deep fall, he was a white male.
  • People obsess over Japanese culture
  • If you notice, people especially whites or racist whites, tend to praise East Asians for their intelligence, culture, and beauty at the expense of Blacks
  • They have it so much easier and I am jealous

Christelyn how do I deal with this? it is not Latina, biracial or white women that I feel threatened by, its East Asian. I just feel like I cannot compete with them at all, no matter how feminine I am, and I am crushed by my previous guy’s comments on his Asian Fetish ( he was my first and it brought tears to my eyes)

Sincerely, Anonymous 21 year old black woman

Here’s my take…

Christelyn Karazin is the co-author of Swirling: How to Date, Mate and Relate, Mixing Race, Culture and Creed. She also operates the popular blog, Beyond Black & White, and operate the first forum dedicated to black women interested and/or involved in interracial relationships.

7 responses to "QOTW: "I Feel Threatened By Asian Women.""

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  1.   Sofomor says:
    Posted: 22 Nov 17

    Dear Ms. African Girl threatened by Asian ladies, the Golob is round so don't worry! I had a Girlfriend from Japan. she was a student in Germany! it was indeed quite a different experience with her than other ladies I knew before, even my First Ex. love and the Mother of my children who were and is still the most beautiful woman ever I had... But My Asian Girl friend had a unique character of art to attract and understand even prognosis what may worry me or make me angry in the coming days' let alone at her presence, it was really amazing, how she treated men, especial a man like me who wanted to climb up on every tree after Divorce! I was learned then after her on how to organize my self, the essence of true love, tolerance, and Respect only because of her! Now she lives in Kyoto with her Mother. Me, alone in Germany, looking in hope for her type.... but my history couldn't generalized all Asian Girls but most of them I can say, especially Japan women are unique.

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  2.   Sapphirem38 says:
    Posted: 06 Aug 17

    In reading the letter, I questioned if this young black woman was born and raised here in the US. There's something about the way she wrote the letter in terms of the words she chose and how the letter was presented that suggest she may be of another heritage Which is fine but may also play a major role in why this young lady is intimidated by Asian women. I've never met an African American woman young or older who's ever been intimidated by Asian women. The whole concept confuses me. I think other "black" cultures outside of the U.S. perpetuate certain stereotypes within their young women and they internalize these stereotypes as true and correct which is completely damaging. Although I am NOT a fan of Christelyn as a person I do appreciate her creating the video w/ a beautiful Asian young lady to show in the flesh how untrue and unfounded those stereotypes are. I totally agree with the content of the video because it's true... it all depends on how YOU love yourself and confidence w/in. Once you love yourself it's impossible to be intimidated by ANY woman. Stop the obsession w/ being envious of Asian women and tackle your own insecurity within whatever that is. Lastly, learn to make better choices when dating white men. It's very very easy to detect the men who see us as a fetish vs genuine attraction. Your insecurities and lack of self love was blazing like the sun on a hot summer day and I'm sure your "first white man" picked up on it. White men are not prizes or trinkets... they're men just like any other man. Vet them carefully this will help to safeguard your heart and emotions from unnecessary stress.

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    • FmaleLedRshp says:
      Posted: 15 Sep 17

      LOL! I too am entirely confused, threatened by asian women.. A black woman? Mighty strange.

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  3.   Mosiah7 says:
    Posted: 04 Aug 17

    It takes some reaching for a black woman to feel threatened by Asian women. Insecurity issues galore in that article.

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    • Sheilaisy says:
      Posted: 08 Aug 17

      Am so black to be a black woman . The Lord took His time to create us. We have got it all the ass. Boobies and curves. We are well endowed. Who can beat that. You are so insecure babe. Deal with your insecurity issues before you step into any other relationship. A man should drool over you and worship the ground you step on . Am a black African woman from the continentop of Africa.

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