Essence reader calls cover model a white supremacist

Posted by James, 11 Jan

essence on reggie bushThe February issue of Essence Magazine: Black Men, Love & Relationships, has Reggie Bush, the NFL player who is in an interracial relationship with Kim Kardashian. The main focus for this issue is celebrating Black love. Having Reggie on the cover really aroused a flood of seething comments from readers just because he is dating a non-black woman and the magazine targets Black women.

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Here one of those comments:

“Why is there a white supremacist on the cover of Essence magazine? Because any person who thinks white women are better is indeed a white supremacists. Having this man on the cover is beyond offensive to me as an African American woman. He is just another crude reminder of all the black men who perpetuate racism against black women, by rejecting them and showing the utmost disrespect by choosing to date non-black women”

So, what is so wrong with celebrating the committed and loving interracial relationship of this Black man? Assuming the issue was about Black women, love and relationships and Halle Berry was on the cover that’s celebrating Black love, would we have seen the same reaction?

192 responses to "Essence reader calls cover model a white supremacist"

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  1.   TYRANT says:
    Posted: 14 Feb 10

    At first I was going to pass this topic up, but I've decided to allow myself to get draggged in and post my thoughts on the subject. As a black man, I do NOT think Reggie Bush was the right choice for the cover of Essence Magazine, because he's involved with Kim Kardashian-a non black woman. When I picked up the magazine-yes I read Essence-I wanted to hear how the black men pictured felt about their relationships with black women, and to be honest, I just don't think I got enough of that. As to the whole issue of being a white supremacist, I don't believe Reggie Bush is a white supremacist, because he hasn't only dated non black women like say...Tiger Woods, who's referred to himself as anything but BLACK. When he announced to the world that he's CALABLASIAN, the owners of both Webster and Oxford dictionaries were calling each other and asking WTF is he talking about. LOL My definition of a white supremacist is a black woman/man who uplifts every race of man/woman but BLACK men/women, and promote them as "superior" men/women. As if that's not enough they'll give you a gazillion reasons WHY they'd never date another BLACK man/woman. A perfect candidate for the white supremacist title would be Evia-yes I've read her blog-and the woman is without a doubt, a white supremacist.

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  2.   Bamababe2k9 says:
    Posted: 13 Feb 10

    Ichibod comparing Tyler to Hitler is just plain stupid. The man wears a dress, so the F what? Like I said I bet a lot of this has to do with you being uncomfortable seeing a black man in drag though other black actors have done it. You are afraid that him wearing a dress will make men like you look like a sissy.

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  3.   Ichibod says:
    Posted: 13 Feb 10

    Adolf Hitler put a lot of Germans to work. It led to the extermination of millions of Jews, but maybe if he wore a dress it wouldn't have so bad.

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  4.   neverdun17 says:
    Posted: 13 Feb 10

    @tatted2death Thank you for your feedback. You're the first to respond to what I had to say. I thought that either no one read what I had to say or I was just so far off that everyone felt it wasn't even worth responding to

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  5.   Bamababe2k9 says:
    Posted: 13 Feb 10

    @tatted2death Thank you for the comments. Sometimes as black folks we need to just get over ourselves and stop trying to make every situation about us. What Tyler Perry is doing has put a lot of black actors and acteress to work and that's should be more important then whether or not he wears a dress. @12cuddlewith My Name is Earl is actually pretty funny at times and that's my point, we act like at times we can't even laugh at each other or with each other any more.

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  6. Posted: 13 Feb 10

    I must also say I loved neverdun17 comments......made the most sense to me....love yourself as you are....NATURALLY. But as for this topic as a whole I must say it is just plain stupid....If Reggie was dating say a "light-skinned" sista, people STILL would have had something to say. Way too many people are "color-struck" in this day and age and that is just SAD. I don't want to hear anything about BLACK nationalism or anything of the like until THAT madness can be done away with.....NOT LIKELY, IT SEEMS. Peace

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  7. Posted: 13 Feb 10

    Wow...bamababe.....I loved your comment "We hurt ourselves sometimes by being petty." That speaks volumes to why alot of things go wrong in the world.....in SOOOOO many different situations. Peace and Blessings tatted2death

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  8.   godiva61 says:
    Posted: 12 Feb 10

    @Ichibod, Ichi is Japanese for the number 1, isn't it?? I'm thinking about the comment referring to your name.. Well, Ich btween being sick and blizzared in at work for the last 4days, I never got the chance to buy the magazine, so I could read the article. I will comment on the so called controversy. First off, Reggie is a black man that's in love/relationship, so why not? Just because his relationship is not with a black woman, is no ground's to omit Reggie and there is definitely no moral, or itelligent reason to refer to him as a white supremacist, that was foul. What bother's me personally is when I hear of the negative comment's, it somehow turn's into a ENTIRE black woman issue and James seems to enjoy bringing these type of articles to this site. Contrary to popular belief, we are INDIVIDUALS and we don't ALL have the same thought, ideas, expectations or belief's!!! I think perhaps, part of the controversy is because of what Reggie has been alleged to have said about black women. I won't comment on that because as far as I'm concerned, I didn't hear him say it, so it's a rumor in my eyesight. Maybe he did, but maybe he didn't. If you add this allegation into the equation, then the fire start's. From a marketing point of view only, perhaps Reggie was not the best choice, and I stress, MARKETING!! Maybe LaDainian Tomlison, would have been the better choice if you were going for the athlete angle. Somehow I have to believe that no matter who was on the cover someone, would have complained. You can't please everyone! I personally would have like to seen someone other than an single athlete on the cover, I would have preferred someone that is married. Bill Cosby and Camille, Colin Powell and Alma, just to name a couple. I too am curious as to how this would have played out if Halle had been the choice?? I like Halle but she is not the epitomy of a black woman. What if Essence had put a Robert DeNiro or his wife, Grace on the cover, or the former Secetary of Defense, William Cohen or his wife Janet? Something to think about???????? godiva

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  9.   Sanekewe says:
    Posted: 09 Feb 10

    Hey people what is all the fuss...!! All people have a right to choose who they want to be in a relationship with...Is it realy anybodies...BUSINESS..! Stop judging and leave me alone....!I am white and date black men...so what. I dont seem to have a problem when African american women date white men. Some of my best friends are Latina and they date white men...!! It is comments like these that keep us all at each others THROATS...all the time....!! Can we all just get along....if you and I both cut ourselves the blood will always be red...!! We are all the same race...THE HUMAN RACE...!!!

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  10. Posted: 08 Feb 10

    OMG My name is Earl is funny as hell and i just started watching now...yeah a lil late but i don't see anything wrong with it, yeah there folks in the trailer parks....its all done in good humor. It's a comedy and if i am good in my own skin stuff like that won't bother me because it doesn't reflect my life. I personally don't find nothing wrong with Tyler Perry's movies, there is always a messaage of some sort. Tyler is playing a character thats it. A character only it doesn't reflect the whole black community and i think if the black community had a problem with the movies they wouldn't continue going or or buying the movies. It is what it is....if it bothers some then i guess it do, if white folks aren't going to make fun of themselves then shyt black folks do. "shrugs"

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  11.   Bamababe2k9 says:
    Posted: 08 Feb 10

    Gentleman, I think a lot of this is you being uncomfortable with the sexuality of a black man dressing in drag. Eddie Murphy did it, Martin Lawerence did it, Jamie Foxx did it and all of them are black and successful and to my knowledge hetersexual. Have either of you seen the show my name is Earl? The show is off the air now but basically the show was about this white trash guy who wins 100k who goes around trying to make up for all the bad things he did. The show consented of his dumb brother, his white trash ex wife who got pregnant by other men and was married to a brotha who was the smartest character on the show. I guess my point is that wasn't the best representation of white people I've ever seen but you didn't hear white folks complain about it. My thing why can't we be more supportive? So, it's not your cup of tea but a lot people relate to these movies and they do send a positive message. Fellows, I got news for you black folks aren't perfect. I remember when the Color Purple was put down by a lot of black men because it put them in a bad light which I think hurt the movie and prevented it from winning an Oscar which it deserve. We hurt ourselves sometimes by being petty. This man did all this stuff so he can be his own boss and whether you like it or not, he has succeeded.

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  12.   Member says:
    Posted: 08 Feb 10

    Dear Bama I think that is a straw man argument. I am debating the merits of Tyler Perry's work. It almost like you are saying "well" let black people be coons. The "brother" would be out stealing and robbing if he didn't dress up in drag and do movies. Give me a break. Who says indirect prostitution by black women and books is okay. I said she is a "survivor" considering the tough background she came from. She really has no influence on anything. Black women denounce her. Karrine is not a role modeel. Go look at the colleges she speaks too. They boo her off stage. Tyler "Cherry" is praised for what exactly? Portraying black people are struggling, senile, and etc. He has enough money to "branch out". He doesn't hire writers that "step out of the box". The Precious "movie" was a decent movie. I don't think a movie like this would have been done without the help of Tyler Perry and Oprah. HOWEVER, they ran away when the critics was like who this "fat sloppy dark black woman"? They white audience sure didn't see this movie. Tyler "Cherry" can put Precious in his next movie. I want to see that. Let me point out another movie. What was it "My three daughters". Some shit like that. Gabrielle Union looks cold and out of touch because she don't want to be with a man with 3 kids. The guy gets "upset about it". Oh yea, he left out he went to prison for rape with a white girl. He said 'he ain't do it" but you are in Georgia, I assume. You fucking a white girl in racist Georgia???? You ain't bother telling her that until your baby mother told on you. Oh yea, they fall in love at the end of the movie. Holy shit! Tyler "Cherry" made a left turn off a CLIFF. C'mon son

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  13.   Ichibod says:
    Posted: 08 Feb 10

    Spike Lee's "Inside man" made $88 million in 2006, but that's beside the point. Thanks for waiting, it only took me a fews seconds to Google. Who cares about how much money a movie makes. That's what has more movie aficionados gravitating toward independant films rather thtn major studio releases. People focus more on what pays rather than the art form itself. I just don't respect a person who reinforces stereotypes. That's why I can't stand Rap and R&B nowadays. Spike Lee presents expositions on black stereotypes in just about every film of his, begging questions as to why. Spike came at time when Black directors were virtually none existent and the ONE that did exist only did hilarious, quasi-coon comedy (gotta love 'Hollywood Shuffle'). "40 Acres and a Mule" is his studio and production company, founded long before Perry studio. Just go ahead and get your box of tissues. Dave Chappelle walked away from $50 million because people have a sense of humor, but have shown that they aren't sure what they really should be laughing at and why. Smart brotha! We need to quit showing our young black boys how to wear women's clothing immediately.

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  14.   fenway2k says:
    Posted: 08 Feb 10

    Hey, ho's need love too...lol!

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  15. Posted: 08 Feb 10

    I have a question,as black folks have we lost our sense of humor? So can't laugh at ourselves any more? I like Madear and I think the character is funny but I guess some of us lost our sense of humor. I find it interesting Queen that you have no problem with some woman a black woman at that profitting from giving black men sex and then writing a tell all about it, but have a problem with a brotha making a living wearing dresses in order to make an HONEST living. Can you say double standard? It's ok to be a ho,right?

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  16. Posted: 08 Feb 10

    @Ichibod Trust me I'm not sitting here with a bag of tissues crying in my beer I just felt the need to set you straight. Tell me the last time Spike Lee made a movie that made over $50 million in the last 10 years? I'll wait. Tyler Perry is smart. He knew exactly what to do and now he owns his own studio, producing his own movies and his own television shows. My thing is as long as the public is going to buy the tickets, he is going to keep wearing the dresses.

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  17. Posted: 07 Feb 10

    Well i am sure we have all done stuff in our personal lives that others might think are a lil slutty hahaha. We are all human and we all make mistakes.....my life goes on and i am sure with you too in regards to the women. I personally don't think Karrin made good choices, those were choices she made back then i guess as some say to survive but her survival ideas weren't gonna last forever and unfortunately she is considered a slut and one to stay away from and thats sad. i mean i guess i guess i want positive things said about me when i die,and what can she have on her tomb stone lol a penis and the words RIP superhead lol ok yeah i had to go there. as far as pamela goes, yeah she did the whole playboy thing and that show but i don't sit and look at her like omg i wanna be her, i want my real boobs and shape. lol and Paris, yeah she should be grown enough to know its not ok to sound dumber than a box of rocks. lol Now she i will call a slut hahahahaha or done slutty things.

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  18.   bigeyes31 says:
    Posted: 07 Feb 10

    yeah I don't think bad about any of them really, I just like making points...sometimes I like being "messy" that's what we call it in Alabama,lol. I don't think she is a slut, I think they (paris, pamela, kim and karrine did some slutty things but I still like to watch them as celebrities,lol. I'm addicted to the "glam" of it all just the same,lol.

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  19. Posted: 07 Feb 10

    I was making a general statement about the hating....i didn't reference it in saying specifically you were and if it came across that way it wasn't meant to be......and YES it is a blog....i think i am quite aware of it. lol You are entitled to your opinion just like i am....But don't assume that i am going to defend pamela or paris.....we already know what paris is all about....and in my opinion she is at a different level then Kim. My issue is there is somewhat of a difference of between the two because again Kim didn't sleep her way to where she is....her video was that of a private moment with her boyfriend....whereas Karrin slept with rich men, lived off of men and then exposed all the men who looked out for her and threw their dirt out there.....and you find that ok? Don't get me wrong all these men i hold just as accountable as her and they knew better and they could of said no. maybe you don't cause you called them both sluts, but what i really wanted to know is WHY you think Kim is a slut.....that was really my ? but yeah i got off the track lol

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  20.   bigeyes31 says:
    Posted: 07 Feb 10

    LOL this is certainly NOT about Kim K being "pretty" because Karrine is just as pretty to me,so "can" the implications.BTW thank you, I know this already,lol. YOU act as if YOU know all about Kim K, not Me.You keep using her personal background as if you her "personal" assistant or something. If you do something in private that you can't do in public, then DON'T do it...bottom line. I don't care one bit about Kim K's background, who her daddy is/was, it's PLENTY of good women and girls out on the streets doing questionable things with good backgrounds and well-off "daddys". Since you say it's NOT about race,name ONE black woman who has shot to A-list fame under the same conditions as Kim Kardashian. I, however CAN name some white ones....Paris Hilton, Pamela Anderson. Now I know how you are to defend them"oh they were famous before",lol remember I'm dealing with LEVELS of fame and also INFAMY too. This is not a sorority so "hating" on the "pretty women" have nothing to with it. This is a blog. On that note, you contradict yourself,one minute you say that it's about the person's character(for you) but in the next you imply that I'm "hating" on her because she is "pretty" but I couldn't POSSIBLY be going on character as well, again I emphasize this is NOT a sorority....your points are debatable.

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  21. Posted: 07 Feb 10

    let me clarify this cause i was typing to fast: lol NOT all women hate on a pretty woman......

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  22. Posted: 07 Feb 10

    @bigeyes your entitled to your opinion no doubt but for me these two women it has nothing to do with the color of their skin......it has to do with what they do and how they carry themselves. I mean i don't know where you get your facts about Kim from....i mean i'm sorry but Superhead got herself to the top by giving blow jobs, knowing video taping herself with men to put on the net, expecting men to pay for this and that and support her not caring that they had wives....she phucked her way to the top and when finally men probably opened their eyes on to her game and yes she ran a good game, they bailed on her, how could she support herself.....eventually other video women came to light that were actually alot cuter than her and she out on her butt, not wanted for videos but blow jobs...i mean come on men want a good one lol and i am sure back then it was cool to them knowing they had a taste of superhead...but hello everyone has.....she used folks and threw their business out there to get a head....i don't find that morally right...but hey thats the game i guess....and she can't blame anyone for throwing her biz in public when she told the whole world....u don't want folks to know shyt zip your damn lips (and i mean her mouth lol).....................now if i had to compare her to another black woman out there the other black woman would be on top. As far as Kim again, how you know she is a slut or is it the fact that yes she is a pretty woman.....you know women do hate others because they are very pretty...and kim is and so are you. If anyone makes a home video with the person they love we don't expect it to be thrown out there in the internet world u know and i don't think Kim expected that.....and i would be furious just as she was.....if u feel she was famous because of the tape so be it......but i am sure thats not what she wants to be remembered as....i mean you speak like u know everything inside and out about Kim...... For me if i had to break it down like this and i to choose between the two to learn some business tips on how to get to the top, i wouldn't want to get any advice from Karrine about sleeping and phuckin to the top cause thats not how i want to get to the top by using and exploiting myself or others..how to live off of men to pay my bills cause i choose not to get a real job..i'd rather learn business sense from Kim.....now thats my opinion regardless of what anyone has to say......and no its not based on race.....cause if it were Oprah or Kim...i'd pick Oprah, lol its all about the character of the person.....what has Karrine given back to this world......atleast i know Kim has given back......

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  23.   Ichibod says:
    Posted: 07 Feb 10

    "I don’t get anything Bamabelle is saying. I understand it, but it makes no sense." That does sound contradictory. What I meant was, I didn't need you to clarify what you were saying, I think your reasoning and logic is off. Tyler Perry DOES what the system dictates by continuing stereotypes and coonery. Spike lee went broke by doing films like "Malcolm X". Like white studios were really ready to back "School Days", "Jungle Fever", Mo Better Blues, or " Do The Right Thing". Selling out is what it is. A person sucking up to the boss the get ahead is usually just from the perspective of other people. Some people like to confuse kissing up with a good work ethic. Pastor John Hagee once said, "Your repsonse is based on your conviction, not your circumstance." That's integrity. I wasn't trying to put you down. Sorry your feelings are so easily hurt by differing opinions.

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  24.   Member says:
    Posted: 07 Feb 10

    Dear Bama So you would compromise your values and sell your ass simply to survive? I don't believe in "do anything" to survive. There is just some things that you must stand firmly on. I couldn't see myself living in a shelter. I would rather go to prison. That is just how I am. Tyler Perry hardly takes chances. He is a slave to his contract with a big movie conglomerate. It was contingent on him making "Madea" a franchise. He couldn't stop wearing the dress if he wanted too. He has creative "control" contingent on making a profit. Show me where he took a chance like Spike Lee did? There is no comparison here. Tyler Perry's flaw is not having the "courage" to expand the characters of black people. Spike "grew" as a film maker. Tyler Perry so stubborn he lashes out at Spike Lee. The guy is a cotton picking jerk. He either demonizes professional black women. He has old black women looking senile and stupid. The same goes for the elderly black characters. He has more sympathy for the "drug addict" black people and prostitutes. I figure because of his background he just gravitates to that. I will never forget what some professional black women told me. They saw Madea goes to jail and was amazed at the "end of the movie". Are you fucking serious? Marrying a prostitute. EVEN, if she did lock the girl up falsely. You are going to snitch on your long time fiancee. She was on her way to prison "anyway". She was abused and all that but seriously. I thought about it like "yea" the movie went "left" at the end lol. Tyler Perry is getting the money but he is not expanding. Meet the browns television show continues with the same buffoonery. Even damn "Family Matters" had more substance than this shit lol. This is how I feel. LOL Watch shows like "Roc", "Fresh Prince of Bel Air" "Cosby show" (no Bill Cosby fan but the show was good". Even a "Different World". Yea I said Fresh Prince of Bel Air. I remember hanging out an Ivy league college across my my college. The rich white kids would watch this show "endlessly". If you notice, the last show to display "rich black children" was different strokes. Will Smith was able to transcend the color issue. I forgot it was even an all black show. Tyler Perry has been successful in mainstreaming the black people that have "mental illnesses". My uncle is like "Mr Brown" with the colorful clothes. I don't think shit is funny all the time. My grandmother dress like "Madea" but she don't act like a buffoon. Where the white shows at showing "Trailer Park" white people other than on MTV, where you know it's pure bullshit. I remember when Roseanne had her own show. It was a little bit like "Tyler Perry" but from a poor white trash point of view. That "show" wasn't buffoonery ALL THE TIME. Once it went into that direction it got canceled. Tyler Perry should just say look " I do comedy". Instead he says he uses "comedy" to talk about "issues". I don't think so negro!

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  25.   fenway2k says:
    Posted: 07 Feb 10

    @ Bri.... Lol! I guess you're not happy now! May I offer you a mug of herbal tea? That coffee gets you too hyped!! Struck a nerve, huh? You must have been looking in a mirror when you alluded to that. It's a problem now to have the ability to see and respect another person's point of view without necessarily agreeing with them? Girl please! No one attacked me like you did. Don't get mad because someone can call you on your Angry-Black-Woman- Walking-With-Big-Educated-Stick mentality. I'm a patient man with an even greater knack for teaching so let's get out of the post graduate stratosphere and relate at the elementary level for a moment shall we? "...What I derived from your post is a need to have a counter-argument for a Black woman taking issue with the type of Black man who could say those types of things about Black women…" "...The fact that you find it ridiculous that as a Black woman I attribute significance to the examples Black men set only proves my point further..." It's statements like these that reveal your bitterness and jaded mentality. Allow me to apologize for whoever (some Black man?)caused you to be this way. Why is it so important for you to say Black this, or Black that? The FACT (hey, there's that word you are so fond of) is that these statements are made by men and women, the color of their skin is irrelevant. I responded to you as a person with an opinion, nothing more. YOU interpolated Black, Black, Black and male and female into my comments, I didn't. "...The fact that Black women date out of their race shouldn’t be taken at face value either. There are plenty who do so for the wrong reasons, the difference between me and you is I have no problem admitting that..." This is the FACT...whatever REASON they have for dating WHOEVER is their choice, their right, and their business. Once again, for you or anyone else in the peanut gallery to sit back, look at another person's life, and interpret their choices as being a statement for 'The Cause' is RIDICULOUS! "...But I guess if you belong to the school of thought that says a Black woman who wouldn’t date a cross-dressing drug addict (Rodman) but would date a successful man of any race is somehow a hypocrite then I guess this all Greek to you?…." I never stated that a woman is a hypocrite because they would choose a successful White Man over Dennis Rodman. Where did you get that? Who I called hypocrites were the women who criticized Black men for dating outside their race knowing full well that they would too if the "white" opportunity presented itself. You even admitted to this! If you want to criticize Black men for running to White women, just make sure that you don't go running to white men, that was my point. I mentioned Dennis Rodman only because he had a point in saying that it amazed him how some of those same Black women who refused to date him when he was broke were all over him when he got rich, then turned and criticized him for dating white women. "... I made a factual statement about college attendance among Black adults and you felt burned…personal problem that has nothing to do with me…yes there are twice as many Black women who receive college educations than there are Black men…" Did I not give you credit for this? Did I not acknowledge your statement as fact? Where is the denial you mentioned? Here is what said, "...3)In ‘typical’ fashion you and every one like you (believe me you are not alone) want to put yourself up here and put Black men down there. All your stats are fine, even true but there is one fact you conveniently overlooked: THEY DON’T TYPIFY BLACK MEN!..." I give credit where its due. You brought up the education issue, I didn't. You seem to take offense at the fact that I am possibly your contemporary. That eats you up, so to make yourself sleep at night, you attempt to dehumanize me and disparage me by inferring that I am stupid, in denial, and gay. I laugh because for all your Ivy-League (isn't that code for White man's?) education, you showed your young age by making this dialog personal by insulting me. In other words, you threw a temper tantrum...lol! Once again, my point is the same (let's keep this conversation in context)...who a person chooses to date for whatever reason is their choice, and is not a reflection of the Black Struggle, just a reflection of who they are as people. I tell you what, remember the movie Barber Shop? Maybe you could take all the angry women on this post and start one of those morning exercise groups that Eve was in...lol! BLACK MEN AINT SHIT....BLACK MEN AINT SHIT!!!

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  26. Posted: 07 Feb 10

    Didn't you just contridict yourself by saying you understand what I'm saying but it makes no sense? huh? That statement made no sense. I support and understand what Tyler Perry is trying to do because him making Madear movies allows him freedom to make the kind of movies he wants instead of waiting on a white studio like Spike Lee. I don't call that lack intergrity, I call that being smart. A lot of us at our jobs have to kiss ass of people we can't stand in order to move up. Does that make that person have a lack of intergrity too? That was my point about Hattie Mcdaniel she probably didn't want to play a maid but she did in order to make it in Hollywoood. She was ridicule by black folks as well just like Tyler Perry is now but it allowed her to do other projects like having her own show before she died. All this BS about intergity and what you wouldn't do, you don't know what you'd do sometimes to make it. I don't know what you are reading but I'm reading men taking pot shots at women and women taking pot shots at men which is typical among us my point was you don't see the white folks doing that but we feel the need to put each other down in order to make a point. Just like you did with my statement, if you don't get it all you have to do is ask me to clarify my statement. Simple as that.

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  27.   Member says:
    Posted: 07 Feb 10

    Dear Bri You do the same thing you accuse us of. Look at your statement "I’m also 20 with an advanced Engineering degree from an Ivy League College, I didn’t start a degree war with you but I’m not uneducated either, just an fyi, my name doesn’t end in -isha" Even, if your name ended in "isha", what is wrong with that??????????? Bama point taken. I skimmed over her biography. I was surprised she did so many roles. I thought she only did "Gone with the Wind". She did more roles than a MAJORITY of black actresses currently in Hollywood today. This is extremely sad. I think you addressed me and my statements about Shaemka with three kids by different daddies. I don't know how it is "bigotry". CONSIDERING, there are Shameka's with kids by different men. That happens in the black community to often. I can never understand some intellectual black women "elite". It is almost like they want to hide "the lower socioeconomic side of the black community. Now, if a white guy said "what I said". Perhaps they would crucify him. I am just saying what people think their "head". I was watching the show "The Duggards", they have 19 kids or so. The nation "loves them". A black family with multiple children. It's "oh" call the child welfare department and etc. Look at what they did the "Octomom". If she was a white woman, they wouldn't have been more sympathetic towards her. You are on a slippery slope accusing black men of bigotry. Also, there are no black kids named "Dequan, Shamika, and Temaka??? Show me the white men dating black women with kids by different men. Perhaps, I would feel different about my statements. I stick by my statements! I am not Tavis Smiley aka Travis "Liely". Bill Cosby can say "harsh" things but when I say it. All hell break loose!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Your 20 years old and exceptionally smart. However, you have get out into the "real world". Than, maybe your opinions might change. Not that I am trying to change them. I thought all your points were thought out perfectly. Oh yea, never went to an Ivy League school and studied Criminology/Sociology at a state school. I just try to learn new things everyday. Disclaimer "The rights to Laurelton Queens comments are his own. It does not reflect the other black men on the board or the larger black community". Thank you

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  28.   Ichibod says:
    Posted: 07 Feb 10

    Fenway, I didn't see anything wrong with your posts. I have no idea what Bri problem is. She has issues with black men, period. She went off on Topdeck calling him "naive" and got mad when you said "REDICULOUS". Then called someone your consigner as if you enlisted him to say anything. In typical fashion, delusional. She just thinks you're cute and doesn't understand (and obviously doesn't like) how you can merely SEE another person points, but not necessarily agree with them. Just my take on it. Glad to have you here. Many couples make sex tapes. My brother said he even made one with his wife. Kim K is not a slut. Ray J was the one who released their tape since he got dumped and he was working on a new album at the time. I don't get anything Bamabelle is saying. I understand it, but it makes no sense. It's better to support a black person who sells out their integrity? Black men have been in dresses for far too long. MadTV even did a skit about it. That was hilarious! The majority of people here are commenting on the Essence magazine article and using Reggie Bush, Halle Berry, and Kim Kardashian too make their points. No one here is taking shots at black men or black women specifically. Let's stay on topic! Just throwing this out there, Hattie McDaniel wasn't allowed in the movie theater to see Gone With The Wind when it first came out. Spike Lee has tons of freedom. Especially since he came out when no other black directors were in demand, except for Robert Townsend. I believe Spike is comfortable having Quentin Tarantino as a contemporary/rival than having to wear women's clothing for cheap, played-out laughs. More power to Tyler Perry. He had a rough childhood and is now successful and an inspiration to many. Everyone has the right to date whoever they want were they're rich and famous or not.

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  29. Posted: 07 Feb 10

    Just because people call themselves that word it doesn't make it ok and it doesn't make it any better. Just like some black people that call themselves the N word, that's silly. Mulatto sounds weird and the real meaning behind the word comes from racist latinos, when they aren't calling blacks that, the latinos are calling black people Chango(monkey.) It shows that some people have been badly brainwashed and instead of seeing themselves as human individuals, they see themselves as the labels that white people created to use against them.

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  30. Posted: 07 Feb 10

    @Mr Laurelton Queens actually it was Vivian Leigh as Scarlet O'Hara not Katherine Hepburn. In fact Clark Gable almost didn't go to the party for the movie in Atlanta because Hattie McDaniel wasn't invited. He and her were friends and he went to her parties and her to his. Secondly, black actors and actress sometimes have to to demeaning roles to get recognized but so do so white actors and acteress too. Julia Roberts played a hooker in pretty woman.Heath Ledger played a gay cowboy. Sometimes as people we miss out on shit because we let pride get in our way. Halle's best roles is when she is not playing the perfect woman. That's why it's called acting. Tyler Perry said as long as people want to see her, he will still play Madear. So, when folks stop paying the money, he'll stop playing the role.

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  31.   Robelto says:
    Posted: 07 Feb 10

    I have noticed that a lot of Black American women b**** about "their" men dating White women. My observation it seems that Black American women are the only ethnic group that whine,and find problems with such relationships. Wa-wa-wa! You don't hear White women complaining about white men, who are the largest(traditionally) group in interracial relationships dating Filipinos, Asians,Latinos, etc. You don't hear Asian women, American Indian who are a real minority complain, Mulatto women, any other non-black group complain nearly as much as Black women. If White women did that they would be branded racist, what a double standard! Black women you dont own Black men, just as White women don't own White men! Love does not know color, Jim crow and slavery is dead, people can choose now regardless of color. A few years ago there were complaints about Mulatto women,and women looking too Caucasian(East African- Iman) on the cover of some Black magazine,-,many complaints! Black men and Black women(non-African American),really don't care about such issues as some Black women in America. It would be easier to accept and love someone regardless of race and stop trying to find differences and focusing on the past, just move on. That applies to Whites also! Men in general love women who don't always bitch and are not too demanding, that's why sooo many men Black and White are going overseas (Latin America, East Africa, Asia, East Europe,Ukraine, Russia) to find traditional educated women, some want traditional and passive,; that's their choice- they have peace &satisfaction at least!. These women treat the man like a man like to be treated and do not want to own a mans b***s.

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  32.   Bri says:
    Posted: 07 Feb 10

    No one was trying to put anyone in place, I just pointed out that your blanket statement with RIDICULOUS in caps is not true, especially when you're having conversations with the individual who posted such garbage about Black women as we're named "Shameka" and have "2 or 3 children" and other posts from Black men to the effect of we're "fat" and "have bad attitudes" etc, etc. To then say that who someone dates is not indicative of a deeper dysfunction is false. This forum is full of evidence to prove it. What I derived from your post is a need to have a counter-argument for a Black woman taking issue with the type of Black man who could say those types of things about Black women...I didn't realize that we were defending the Black man's right to bigotry. The posts being made by Black women aren't lists of all the things that are off-putting about Black men put there are plenty of men here who carry pocket anthologies filled with reasons why no one would ever want to date a Black woman. Maybe you should try responding to some of those men if you don't fall into that category..but responding to me is silly because until Black men like that don't exist there will always be two sides to the issue of interracial dating and Black women have every right to express their opinion. The fact that Black women date out of their race shouldn't be taken at face value either. There are plenty who do so for the wrong reasons, the difference between me and you is I have no problem admitting that. The criticism here is not for dating out it's for dating out for the wrong reasons. No one has said not to date who you want but as some of the Black women here have their own negative experiences with Black men to refer to, the message being sent is to stop endorsing interracial dating as a whole and making excuses for the Black men who do exist that date for the wrong reasons. The fact that you find it ridiculous that as a Black woman I attribute significance to the examples Black men set only proves my point further. What you all should really just say is as a Black man I don't think the state of our race is important in the slightest so stop expecting me to do so. As a Black man I don't expect you to care that Black men and women are still portrayed in very negative stereotypes in popular media, I don't expect you to notice the message Black men choose to send with their public image and I don't expect you to know the harsh realities that exist for many Black people in America... I know better than to expect a Black man to be attentive to those types of things. I don't expect you to get that Black brands who depend on Black consumership to survive don't even feature Black images, I don't expect you to take note when Black magazines started by us don't even feature Black people anymore, I don't expect you to blink twice when Black tv networks bombard Black youth with images of drugs, sex and violence, I don't expect you to observe the number of Black men who are walking stereotypes of what White society expects them to be, I know better than to think you could possibly make any connection between the number of Black fatherless children and the fact that Black children have the highest rates of victimization when it comes to physical abuse, sexual abuse and rape, nor do I expect you to pay attention to the fact that domestic violence occurs more frequently in Black homes in comparison to others...Why would you bother to know the mortality rate of young Black men, or how many Black children die from gun violence in urban communities...We're minorities but we currently surpass all other races in every area of familial and community dysfunction...use your two degrees to figure out the probability of a group of people counting for less than 1/3 of the entire population in the United States having the most incidences of intra-community dysfunction. You think there isn't a single connection between the state of our race and Black men who not only think the most rude, crass and baseless things about Black women but ones who actually have no shame in saying their idiotic thoughts out loud?...for every one of you how many Black men do you think there are who read the asinine remarks some of the Black male posters made about Black women and nod and agree? You don't think that contributes any to the state of our Black community in this day and age? What school did you go to again?? The actions of Black men have everything to do with our community because we currently have few who are leaders, few who are role models, and few who accept the responsibility of fatherhood. If that doesn't describe you then you are a minority within our race, give yourself a pat on the back...the difference between all the stereotypes being put forth about Black women and the issues I'm citing now is that they are not just my ignorant opinion, they are FACTS. And yes for some Black men their personal choices are reflective of a disconnect with being Black which is why they contribute very little to fixing the issues on our cultural homefront. I don't care who you date, I do care however if as a Black male you don't care about your own community..which may in turn be evidenced in your relationship decisions. I also don't owe anyone an apology for caring about the way Black men choose to represent themselves when collectively as a people we have a lot left to fix about our own homes. It's 2010 and the recently crowned Miss America happened to be a Black woman who was referred to as an ape of a woman and a crack whore who should go back to the corner she came from so she can sing for crack rocks....you think we've arrived? Seriously? We haven't even started to do the work necessary to equalize ourselves. There ARE individual shortcomings to which Black people are predisposed as a result of the disparity thats exists between our economic status, educational achievements and collective self esteem in comparison to other racial groups. You would be hard-pressed to find a Black adult who doesn't fit into one or more of the above categories. There ARE plenty of issues that effect Black men and women at a disproportionate rate in comparison to other races so when coming across a partner in dating who has certain shortcomings to ignore the connection those shortcomings have to race is naive. As long as White majority America is not ever going to give a damn then those among us who are socially aware will continue to notice when Black America ceases to give a damn too and express our concern. No one said Black men are dumb but I'm not going to cosign for any who make general statements about all Black men simply because they esteem themselves to be the way, the truth and the light. You are not the end all be all representation of the Black male mentality...if none of the posts by Black women apply to you is it impossible to acknowledge that statistically there are more who do fit that description than aren't? If you were more humble it would be easy to admit that our race is full of people with color issues so it can't be said that people don't date for the wrong reasons. I also have a problem with you all going so far as to play the victim in this situation. No one is attacking your personal dating choices, I don't even know you...but you wouldn't refer to rape as sex would you? No! Terms such as rape, incest, statutory rape and then sex all exist for different reasons and you shouldn't have to personally experience any of the former to know it's not the latter...so when someone generalizes that ALL interracial dating relationships are love, yes, please expect the Black woman who knows for a fact on account of the Black man who is or was in her life to challenge that type of ignorant remark. The personal choices of Black men do effect our race struggle if they are the result of an apathetic mentality towards their own communities so therefore not everyone is quick to be a cheerleader for the choices that affect our experience negatively. But I guess if you belong to the school of thought that says a Black woman who wouldn't date a cross-dressing drug addict (Rodman) but would date a successful man of any race is somehow a hypocrite then I guess this all Greek to you?.... And your cosigner should read and reread..I referenced job promotion in addition to sports and music as ways in which Black men get ahead, but how ironic of him to point out my non-existent generalizations and then go on to say: "Why would a man want to date a Black woman with kids by different men?" When did he complete the survey on Black women with children? Could you ask him to please post the results so we can all be as enlightened as him? He knows for a fact it's typical for a Black woman with children to have several different fathers for them? There aren't women of all races who have kids with different men?? That's my point exactly..Black men like him have a preset stereotype in mind of what Black women are and then make personal life decisions based on that stereotype. Is his head chockfull of stereotypes about women of other races too...or just us? Oh, let me guess, the generalizations he makes about women of other races are probably positive...he just reserves the negative statements for us...and then he goes on to say "Na I ain't take care of Dequan, Shamika, and Lakisha. You never ask the white man to do that. Black men never get the credit we deserve. We take on women with kids by previous men. We date full figured women." This is your cosigner, this is the type of Black man the statements you make appeal to, someone who would generalize that Black women name their children Dequan and Lakisha..who feel they can tell a Black woman what she would and wouldn't do in a relationship with a man of another race because Black men know our thoughts so well and who thinks we're all fat....bravo both of you...If you feel you don't have something in common with this person then maybe you should take a second look at what the statements you're putting forth are really saying because it's apparent he sure thinks he has a lot in common with you....maybe you could let your friend here borrow one of your degrees I'm also 20 with an advanced Engineering degree from an Ivy League College, I didn't start a degree war with you but I'm not uneducated either, just an fyi, my name doesn't end in -isha and I don't have any children for the peace of mind of you and your boyfriend....you must have some sensitivity attached to how smart you are or aren't perceived by complete strangers though because I didn't make any statements about the level of education you achieved.. I made a factual statement about college attendance among Black adults and you felt burned...personal problem that has nothing to do with me...yes there are twice as many Black women who receive college educations than there are Black men...thankfully you belong to the group of Black men who is educated but what I said above was not an opinion, it's a fact...Black men love to ignore that at the end of the day the statements I make are rooted in reality versus the statements of your cosigner which are rooted in opinion...just because you don't fall into any of those categories doesn't mean denial will change the statistics that exist about our demographic, action will, but denial won't...parading around high falutin because you did something with your life won't change the fact that until more Black people like us exercise some sense of pride in connection to the race with which we identify instead of a disconnect from the people who look like us but don't live like us our community will continue to suffer and you my friend will continue to be a deviation from the norm...your personal choices have EVERYTHING to do with the place we hold as minorities in America...I can't believe you could even convince yourself otherwise...that has to be one of the stupidest things I've ever read

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  33.   Robelto says:
    Posted: 07 Feb 10

    You stated a lot of accurate facts. However, how can you call what people identify themselves as "silly"? The terminology is regional,its used internationally, some folks call themselves Creoles, in some parts of Africa its Mulatto and 'Coloured (mixed race)What about the classification "Black" to some it would sound silly. If a alot of Mulattoes or mixed race classification called themselves Black, that would be silly since 1st and 2nd generation Mulattoes are Brown skinned. I totally agree with you, Human is more appropiate as there is just a few degrees of separation regardless of mixture.

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  34. Posted: 07 Feb 10

    There are alot of self-hating mixed black people that don't want to be called black. But white people call anyone that looks black, black they don't care if you are mixed or not, the whites created the one drop rule to keep white people seperate from the black race. Since it is racist white people that first seperated themselves from darker skin people and drew the lines between people ask them to give you a new category. Whites are the ones that created categories for people based on their skin color. Mulatto sounds as silly as quadroon and octoroon. If it were up to me i would just call myself human but its up to white people because we live in a white supremacist world and white people don't see me as human because my skin color does not match theirs so they label me as black.

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  35.   Robelto says:
    Posted: 07 Feb 10

    Mulatto is only an insult to SOME, in the Caribbean, and NOT a racial slur anywhere in the world! Maybe archaic term in America for some , but not a racial slur! Some parts of Africa ( some regions use 'coloured')Latin America and also some Americans also use that terminology and identify as such. Look at mulatto.org, frenchcreoles. com we use that terminology to define ourselves . Some people, mostly Black Americans who are NOT Mulattoes have a problem with that, why does it concern them? Are they afraid it will diminish their numbers? There is an alternate terminology used- Creole- (mostly Louisiana). Some Mulattoes in America buy into the propoganda that it is negative, again their is hisatory of proud self-identification, look at Langston Hughes as an example (Google Mulatto and Hughes) among other self-proclaimed Mulattoes and look at Haitian Mulattoes(Google Haitian war) That 1/2 animal stuff is used to negate and refinforce our identity as Mulatto to force the choice of being identified as Black . In addition, its not the same as the 'N' word! You will never hear the dreaded 'M' word meaning Mulatto. We can take the negative connotations and make it positive, that has being done alot in this country with words, all semantics and periodic. Well,its all seems to be regional anyway; whats offense to some, is a pride to another depending on region. Anyway, you cant always trust wiki! Research other sites or books. In the Caribbean, Mulattoes have a history by ourselves ex. Haiti, Jamaica,Dominica Republic, Guadeloupe, Colombia,etc. Look at 'youtube' of those of us who identify as such- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bcO1AUbSsvw

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  36.   Member says:
    Posted: 06 Feb 10

    Dear Bama I agree we much treat each other as individuals. However, Tyler "Cherry needs to take that damn dress off already. He was successful at making the "buffoonery" of black people profitable for himself. He also has a penchant for "putting down" professional black women. He did that shit in Madea goes to jail I think. The man ended up with a prostitute instead of his Lawyer fiancee. Now what she did to "Rudy" was wrong but marrying a prostitute? Tyler "Cherry" gets an F on that one. Tyler "Cherry" did a "Family that preys", again another successful black woman screwing her man over. It almost like he dislikes successful black women for some reason. Spike Lee was right calling him out on it. Halle Berry won for being a two dollar hooker in Monster's ball. That wasn't even her best performance. Go watch Losing Isiah. What was the point of Monster's ball anyway??????????You tell me. I don't know. Hattie McDaniel comparison to Tyler Perry is kind of far fetched. She played a stereotypical character. LOL, not really considering the professions for black women were maids and house wives and other "things" that should remain "nameless". Hattie was a pioneer but she got criticized by black people for doing "maid roles". Black actresses and black actors were relegated to "butler and maid roles". Hattie said " I rather get paid 700 dollars acting as a maid then getting paid 7 dollars to be one". LOL Also, you left out the white audience being mad that Hattie stole scenes from Katherine Hepburn. That was how good an actress she was. Tyler "Cherry" has the power to break those stereotypes but the drag queen won't do it.

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  37.   Member says:
    Posted: 06 Feb 10

    LOL Fenway I agree with your points. Black men are not immune to wanting to change "bad girls". In my younger "years", I frequented the strip clubs. Obviously, in the hood it is a trophy to have a good looking girlfriend and if she was a stripper that didn't hurt. You want the woman with the stripper body but without the "bad reputation". I would be lying to you if I didn't think Karrine wasn't attractive. I can understand "Eddie Winslow" getting infatuated. Eddie fucked up because he is a Christian and dumped his "church girl fiancee" for Karrine. He should have known better. Maybe, if Karrine wasn't as successful and not "kept" herself up. Your opinion on her might change. I always liked the "intelligent" side of her. That is what is so compelling about her. Oh yea, and her persistence to be with a rich black men. She makes it happen and her track record proves it. She was on Jamie Foxx radio show and he always "blows her off". Karrine just kept on trying to seduce him. I started realize how she operates. Hey Big eyes The Kim K comparison to Karrine. Kim K daddy was the Lawyer for OJ during his trial. Karrine comes from a broken home. Kim K , yea the sex tape came out but she was running her own business from the age of 20 years old. She was getting money from 19 years old. Karrine whoring around with rappers for scraps in her early days. The fact that Kim K is white is a factor. But it could be a "class" thing too. Her step daddy is Bruce Jenner. I just don't see the comparison. You can call Kim K whatever. But she is sort of a 'self made woman". She had businesses going without relying on a man for a long time. Karrine did a "come up" on rich black men and profited from it. Now, can she gain money without using people to get ahead? Karrine is a survivor, she overcame obstacles that a normal black girl wouldn't be able to overcome. Right now, she is trying to distance herself from her "past" and she is getting frustrated. She doesn't even like being called "Super head". That is a prison of her own "doing". There are so many black women that dislike Karrine. She said "why you mad at me when you all doing it too". Her arrogance really got black women upset. Perhaps, there are some things you shouldn't talk about. Karrine might have messed up some hustles for black women involved with rich black men. It is a dirty game.

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  38. Posted: 06 Feb 10

    @To the Group. This is exactly my point. Black men b*tching about black women and black women b*tching at black men. To all of you maybe the problem is not the group, but hey how about this, judge the indidivual instead. WOW right. Halle Berry has a right to date who she wants and maybe because she is rich and famous, she wants to take care of her man. Lots of rich and powerful women do this. Hell Monique admitted that herself that in her first marriage, she took care of her husband. I never saw Monster's Ball because like Precious is now, it's so talked about I don't need to see it. But Halle can pretty much write her own pay check after she won the Oscar. How many other black actor's can do that in Hollywood? The woman who you speak quite frankly are slutty but I give Kim K some credit, she is a business woman and hasn't written a tell-all about all the men she screwed in her lifetime. It's women like Super Head who give black women a bad name because there are men out there who see her and think we are ALL like that. I like Tyler Perry. Tyler Perry wearing that dress has allowed him to become a multi-millionaire and become his own boss. A concept a lot of us don't get. People made fun of Hattie McDaniel for being a maid in Gone with the Wind but you know what she said? I'd rather play a maid then be one. Tyler Perry realized in order for him to make the kind of movies he wants to make, he has to have enough money to do it, therefore he puts on a dress and acts like woman. Ask Spike Lee if he wish he had the same freedom as Tyler does. We got to stop people really. That's our main problem as black folks is we don't stick together. As I said before and I'll say it again, you don't other races doing that now do you? But we just can't seem to help ourselves.

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  39.   bigeyes31 says:
    Posted: 06 Feb 10

    Kim Kardashian is slut and Karrine"Super Head" is a slut. Why is one on the A-list and the other on "sH@!t list? A black woman does the same thing,be provacative and slutty and tries to ride it to fame and fortune. Karrine haven't been invited to no talk shows, she haven't been invited to talk to Matt Lauer,lol whatever. The point is both have done some slutty things but Kim Kardashian can at least say she got more for her trouble. Karrine might be married now but I bet he's an average Joe. Most black men with money, or a high profile career would not bring home a black woman with that kind of track record, but he can bring home Kim Kardashian, because in America slut means something else when you are non-black.

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  40.   Member says:
    Posted: 06 Feb 10

    Dear Fenway Karrine Superhead is just a smart SLUT. She has not grown up or anything like that. I disagree with you on that. Yea she did hustle to survive but that does not change who you are. On top of that, she is a snitch. The reason I call her that not because I am from the streets. The cardinal rule is if you are "doing dirt" with people, which was prostitution. You know what it was getting involved with these men. It's all good when the "money is coming in". But when you are struggling you write a book about black men TO bring them down. They was married but you knew that. You got to take the "good with the bad". She should have saved her money instead of thinking these rich black men was going to "support you forever". What did it get her anyway? Their wives are still with them. Ja rule wife with him. Shaq and his wife might reconcile. It is not like their wives was leaving. For the record Ice T "put her on" YEARS AGO. He said he felt sorry for the girl when she came out to California with her son at the time IN THE 90S. He knew "Kool G Rap" and at the time, she "spin the story like" he abused her. Ice T said she was "passed around" to other rappers. But he could see "that she was soaking up the game". Ice T said "man don't fuck with her" she sneaky. He said this, way before, she screwed people over. Again, these celebrity black men still FUCK WITH HER to this day. She must be a super freak for real. She ain't change her ways lol. She was in the 50 cents video with Robin Thicke. That happened by accident? I don't think so. I agree rappers talks about the same thing.I don't like the ballads and all that dance music. I still like "gangsta rap". It depends on the artist. Those "real rap artists" are a dying breed. You got kids from middle class families being hardcore rappers. Basically, that is why the music is not as good as it used to be. I am from Southside Jamaica Queens. I might be biased because Russell Simmons is from here. 50 cents and etc. I pretty much know who is the real deal or not. Them boys in New Orleans are real too. Master P, arguably the most untalented rapper/CEO to ever get rich. All Master P and Baby from Cash Money did was steal the publishing from their artists and then dump them. Keep all the money for themselves. There is nothing "noble" about that. They rip each other off to get rich. Puffy, Baby and Master P. They just happened to be smart enough to "trap" them in deals. What impresses me about Jayz. He was strong enough to breakaway from these crab ass negros like Dame Dash and Biggs. They don't rap but they getting half of everything. Tour money and all that shit. You spending money on whores and various cars and houses and you don't even rap! How long can you carry these "negros". I don't blame Jayz. Anyway, gangsta rap will always be around. Because this is a very macho culture. You got R&B singers with tattoos for god's sake. Gangsta R&B singers. Women sort of like that. My woman like "Neyo". I think he is homo. But you can't tell her that; she just think he is so great. I told her if I catch Neyo, I will whip his ass, if I could get past security. 12 Cuddle you are right on everything.

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  41. Posted: 06 Feb 10

    I don't have a problem with people getting their hustle on and i never said otherwise...all i am saying is i think she was looking more at the $ then how people would be feel for being put out there like yeah. They chose to sleep with her they are grown men making grown folks decisions so its up to them to make the right decision. But i think after book 1 she got a lil greedy and came out with book 2.......i mean is she that hard up for $....and book 2 from my understanding didn't sell as good. Now don't get me wrong i did read book 1 and i know she had a rough life but she could of changed that herself, she played too much of the blame game. She can't be mad at no one for throwing anything in her face if she was the one in charge of her life making those decisions.....and she is the one who threw her business out there like that.....she let the whole world know whats up so no one should get made that its in her face.....don't put it in ours...thats my opinion....she might be trying to get her life back in order and move on but really.....is she?

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  42. Posted: 06 Feb 10

    @fenway yeah i don't think she would notice we are talking about her lmao!

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  43.   fenway2k says:
    Posted: 06 Feb 10

    I tried to misspell her name in an effort to protect the innocent...LOL

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  44.   Ichibod says:
    Posted: 06 Feb 10

    I saw the flick with Karrine Steffins and Mr Marcus a couple of years ago. SUPERHEAD!!! I've never seen anything like it. She tries to promote new books and refuses to talk about her first book when asked about it. It's what got her known. No one would know who she was if it weren't for her talking about who all she slept with... and describing her escapades in detail. It was, however, messed up what Ray J did to Kim. A radio show played the voicemail she left him after he release the sex tape. She was screaming like a little girl. It was pretty sad to hear. But I saw that video as well. WOW! Ray J is a fool.

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  45. Posted: 06 Feb 10

    Mr. L Queens I can understand she had to do what she had to do....i guess to survive.....I don't knock her for it but yet i don't condone it.....i just remember watching a thing i beleive on A & E about Video Vixens and she spoke well yes...but i felt like she was giving out this whole warning....don't do it message...blah blah blah but then she still at it....she wants to be the savior of video ho's but yet she publishes these books. Don't get me wrong some men will run to booty based on the fact she can suck a d....so it's like those mens morals and beliefs are all out the window because they want a taste of superhead and look at what it got em.....exposed like the cheating dogs they are. I mean does she want her kid knowing you got by in this world cause you blew dyck. lol...if she proud then i guess i am proud lol. Men seem to forget she isn't the only woman black or white who can give a good blow job, but i am sure we all are alot more choosier on who we blow lol

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  46.   fenway2k says:
    Posted: 06 Feb 10

    @Bri... Maybe you should read the comment I posted before this one. Once again someone takes an opinion, chooses to take offense at said opinion, and in 'typical' fashion chooses to flex their 'intellectual prowess' to attempt to put me in my place about said opinion, not in an effort to enlighten or educate. Let me state again that I have no contempt for Black women, and I don't see how you could ever derive that from my post. I was only speaking to a very select group of women, those ON THIS POST who criticize Black men for dating White women as if they were betraying their race or have some kind of dysfunction. It is my experience that some of those same women would date outside their race as well if the white... er...right opportunity presented itself....and by your own admission no less! You in your effort to put me in my place failed to see the place my post held. so let's get black for a minute... I personally don't give a damn who dates who. If you choose to date a White man, fine! If they can give you what you want, need, and desire, then I wish you the best. I don't care that you date outside your race. Your choice as an adult and I respect that. I got a life with bills to pay and since none of you pay mine, your opinions and preferences mean squat to me. 2) Who people date is their own choice and their own business, period. It is RIDICULOUS for the peanut gallery to sit back, look at my life or Rodman's or Bush's, and present SPECULATION AND CONJECTURE about the how our personal choices impact the Black Struggle. I date whoever the hell I want, have dated women of all nationalities, am currently dating a Black woman, and race was NOT a consideration in my choices. They were based upon who they were as women, period. And who the hell said Rodman had to be a wise sage to have experienced scorn and ridicule from Black women, only to turn around and have them talk about him for dating White women? 3)In 'typical' fashion you and every one like you (believe me you are not alone) want to put yourself up here and put Black men down there. All your stats are fine, even true but there is one fact you conveniently overlooked: THEY DON'T TYPIFY BLACK MEN! All the relationship issues you and your Sista Girls have with Brothas simply reflect their individual shortcomings as men, not because they are Black. Your facts about Black woman smart, Black man dumb is duly noted...I'll go get another degree to compliment the two I already have. It's a shame that all the bitterness that exudes from YOUR diatribe has jaded you into thinking that the color of a person's skin is the reason people are the way they are. My point has been and always will be that what a person does is their choice and their business. To insinuate race and color into everything someone does is ridiculous. So shame on those in THIS POST ( not every woman) who alluded to such. There Bri...are you happy now?

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  47.   Member says:
    Posted: 06 Feb 10

    I read Bri and Fenway's statements The Dennis Rodman thing is true to a certain degree. He was a janitor and I don't even think he got drafted. Long story short, Dennis said he always had white girls interested in him. How many black women will date an "alternative man". The weirdos with different color hair and strange clothing. Most black women are "conservative". The have an idea of what a man "should be". Contrast Dennis Rodman to Mike Tyson. Mike had white women that liked him in Upstate NY where he trained to box with Cus. Upstate is mainly white people. When Mike got all that money he was with "a lot of black women". You think they would have been with him if he was in Bedstuy Brooklyn being a club bouncer. My answer is YES. BECAUSE Black women have an idea "what a man should be". Not many black women are turned on by a man like Dennis Rodman is might be bisexual or whatever the case. But you will have black women attracted to Mike Tyson. Just like black women find R Kelly attractive and he is a damn child molester. Fenway is right that black women have this list that you must "conform" to. It is like a job interview to date some black women. Bri makes good points but the problem with black women. They focus on the fraction of the fraction of A PERCENT of black men that are rich. LOL It reminds of this white guy that said why black men don't got jobs. They got basketball and football! Like every black men can play sports and rap. The fact is a majority of black men are with black women. A majority of black men are married to black women. You said this "Second a woman not dating a broke man is not a color issue, that’s called having a standard. Why would a woman want to date a grown man who hasn’t achieved financial stability?..Better yet, why would a man of any color even want to represent himself that way to a woman?" Why would any man take on a black woman with kids by different men? Some of these black women have the audacity to say I am a package deal. What does that mean exactly? I have to take care of your kids too that are not biological mine? Na I ain't take care of Dequan, Shamika, and Lakisha. You never ask the white man to do that. Black men never get the credit we deserve. We take on women with kids by previous men. We date full figured women. I am out.

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  48.   Bri says:
    Posted: 06 Feb 10

    I love how all the individuals who express contempt with the Black woman who dares to express an opinion that isn't in the form of kissing a Black man's ass conveniently reference the posts they want to in this forum. If you're going to reference the "huffing and puffing" you might as well mention the negative commentary about Black women you had to pass on your way to pick out the huffs and puffs. When a Black man feels it's his God-given right to run through all the things that are wrong with Black women while dating out may "simply be a choice" it is foolhardy to ignore how ignorant of a choice that is and from whence it really comes. A lot of us are speaking from experience, we don't have to make these things up for our health. I've listened to Black men, who I was in relationships with, deliver manifestos on how woman of other races are endowed with this wealth of goddess like features and attributes to my face....opinions like that coming from a brown-skinned BLACK man are indicative of a deeper dysfunction. Stop making blanket comments about interarcial dating, especially ones that display a one-sided bias. On one hand you want to make a generalization in favor of Black men in interracial relationships but then criticize the dating choices of Black women? For starters I wouldn't necessarily consider Rodman to be a wise sage full of insights into human nature but whatever, if you say so..Second a woman not dating a broke man is not a color issue, that's called having a standard. Why would a woman want to date a grown man who hasn't achieved financial stability?..Better yet, why would a man of any color even want to represent himself that way to a woman? Not too mention if that's the example you want to use you might as well diversify your portfolio..let's look at that scenario from two sides...how many Black male celebrities have Black ex-wives, ex-girlfriends, and fathered children with the Black women from their community, the women they grew up around but then decided to cross the color line only after they became famous?..there are more of those type of Black male celebrities than there are Rodmans. No one is classifying Black men into one group except the people saying things like "it is RIDICULOUS to interpret a person’s personal choices in dating as being a statement of their race pride or lack thereof"...that my friend is a generalization as is "Look at a typical (not every) Black woman’s profile on a dating site and you will usually find a list of demands. If you aint this…if you dont have that….blah, blah, blah." Unfortunately the Black women not arguing the affirmative are probably ones who have personal experiences with Black men who do have issues, so no, things will not just be taken at face value and swept under the rug. Though you may not be one yourself to pretend you don't have peers who fall into the "I have self image and mommy issues so resent Black women and take it out on my dating partners who have nothing to do with my personal problems or choose to only date outside of my own race" is silly. I'm still laughing at the if a White man expresses serious interest in you you seriously consider it...wow, so chossing a relationship that is sure to be stable is somehow a flaw...a woman of any color would entertain a relationship from a man of any color who expressed a serious interest in her...what are you saying? The only thing Black women are guilty of is being loyal to a fault, if Black women want to be with Black men it's because we care about preserving our family structure and community something Black men could care less about....check the statistics on Black single mothers....that has everything to do with Black men leaving, not an unwillingness of Black women to date or marry Black men. Not too mention we outdegree Black men 2:1...a college educated Black women likely works around successful men of all colors, the least percent of them being Black...a typical Black woman would have to go out of her way to even find a broke Rodman type but somehow we still manage to go back to our communities and encourage positive images of Black love for future generations to look up to..versus the Black male modus operandi of desert and defect as soon as I become interesting enough to get a woman of another race who for damn sure wouldn't have looked twice at me before my promotion, record deal, movie deal or NBA draft to hang off my jock strap. Don't make references against Black women that can easily go both ways if you don't want someone to point out the two-sidedness of your statements.

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  49.   neverdun17 says:
    Posted: 05 Feb 10

    On the topic of the Essence reader's negative response to Reggie Bush's part of the article, while I disagree with her labeling Reggie as a white supremacist and implying that black men are automatically racist by dating a non-black woman, I think her response is entirely appropriate considering the fact Essence is "in essence", HER magazine. Essence Magazine is written for black women. Period. Essence has always promoted and glorified the image of the black woman, so its entirely expected for its readers to be offended by ANY slight or implication that they any other race of woman deserves equal respect. The existence of the magazine itself supports and perpetuates a righteous belief that black women are either special in respect to women from other races or that they are superior in any way. It does not promote equality. NOW HAVING SAID THAT, the uncomfortable truth is that the reality of Black American women IS separate and different from other women in America. They ARE victims of discrimination and at the opposite end of the spectrum of American culture's image of beauty. The basis of what is considered most beautiful in America is the models of European high fashion. Fair skin that is tan but NOT dark, very slim with moderate curves, long flowing hair with lots of "body", long eyelashes, high cheekbones and a small/petite nose, and lips that are full but not "too big". Coming out of the womb, black women have completely contrasting features in each category. Dark skin, very curvy, short kinky hair, average/short eyelashes, proportional cheekbones, a larger/wider nose than other races, and bigger lips than other races. Looking at that perspective, how can a black woman leave childhood WITHOUT either hating her natural image or having a chip on her shoulder?? A Black American woman's natural image is NOT considered anywhere close to what is considered to be most beautiful by the culture she lives in. But just like any other human being, she wants to be considered beautiful. She wants to be admired and sought after by the men she finds most attractive. She doesn't want to feel like she has to be something that she's not in order to have just a SHOT at being romantically happy. So most Black American women perm their hair to conform to the image of a what is considered beautiful. They will claim that they do so to make their hair more manageable, but the truth is that they think their natural, kinky hair is ugly and that they aren't as attractive without that perm or those braids that mimic that straight-hair look. I have a sincere question for the black women participating in this discussion. If you are altering the texture and look of your hair to more closely match the "style" that is obviously based on that of European women, and you are dressing in the clothing styles that are set by European fashion/white culture, aren't you holding the image of a white/European woman in higher esteem than your natural image as a black woman, kinky hair/ curvy figure and all? I am not challenging the necessity of conforming to this image in order to be considered attractive or respectable in this society because that is entirely true. I am simply pointing out the reality that by doing so, you are sending a message to everyone that you hold society's standard of beauty higher than your own. And if that is what you're doing, what you are doing is no different than what many black men are doing, which is finding that standard or image of beauty more attractive than that of your own. From that perspective, wouldn't it make sense for ANY man in our society, regardless of race, to pursue what everyone seems to think is most beautiful? Yes, you are being discriminated against, but by conforming to this standard of beauty, you are also discriminating against yourself. In my opinion, Black American women cannot expect for ANY man to appreciate their worth and beauty until they do so themselves. It isn't fair. No other race has to go through all of this just to be cherished and appreciated. No other race of women has to risk being considered unattractive or unprofessional by wearing their natural hair. But that is the society that you happen to have been born into. That is your reality. Until you define yourselves as being beautiful, no one else will.

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  50.   neverdun17 says:
    Posted: 05 Feb 10

    In response to the Essence article, in my opinion the issue is not one of right or wrong. The issue is whether or not it was appropriate. Regardless of whether or not the exclusion of Reggie Bush and his relationship would have represented a bias against interracial relationships, the bottom line is that the magazine tailored to a certain audience. Black men's perception of black woman or how we view black woman as potential partners is an entirely separate issue, as is the question of whether Reggie Bush's relationship with Kim represents interracial dating or same race dating. (As a sidebar, I think anti-interracial dating mentality is seriously flawed). But again, the real question is whether or not it was appropriate. Considering the audience, it was a very poor choice by Essence. If there was a magazine strictly for the K.K.K. and it had a cover showing a white man internationally known for dating a black woman, that cover would be entirely inappropriate. Of course that man dating a black woman is entirely his right and should not receive a negative response from ANYONE, but look at the audience. Marketing to and targeting a specific audience is the lifeblood of any magazine, so having Reggie Bush as part of that story/article was a gross and unforgivable oversight by the editing staff at Essence.

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