Annique & Jan -
Mannheim, Baden-Wurttemberg, Germany
Engaged October 2016
Glad She Forgave His Faux Pas
Annique and Jan live in Germany and met on our site (their English is pretty good, by the way!). We asked Annique about her previous dating experiences. “I was just tired of being alone,” she says. “I tried other sites too, but with no success. In fact, I had been here for more than three years [when I met Jan]. I was so lonely! I read almost all of the success stories and wondered why I couldn’t find mine like the others did.”
Jan says he had been lonely so he “searched and found your site.” He adds that he “just hoped” he would meet someone special. Annique wasn’t that optimistic. “I had no hope at all anymore, after so many years online.”
Then, “maybe three years” after posting her profile, she finally had a stroke of luck. “Jan emailed me,” Annique recalls. “His message was soooo long that I thought to myself that something was going on. I thought he was really interested in me!”
Initially, Jan was drawn to Annique’s profile pic. “I thought she was the most beautiful woman in the world,” he informs us. “I didn’t want to miss the opportunity to write to her. But I was sure I would have no chance to catch her attention.”
But Jan did spark her curiosity, of course. “His message was cute and he looked so calm in his profile pics,” explains Annique. She liked his even temperament.
So they just went on a date and the rest is history, right? Not so fast…
“Jan stopped answering my messages,” Annique reveals. “After awhile he replied to an old message of mine, which made me mad, so I replied that I wasn’t interested in someone who replies to a message weeks later. He said he was sorry and explained that he had an accident at that time, but [at the time] I didn’t really read it.”
Perhaps as frustrated with years of fruitless dating as she was with Jan, Annique stopped logging into our site. “Months later, I came back online and re-read all of our conversations from the very beginning,” she remembers. “At that moment I realized that he had been really kind, cute and extremely interested in me, so I decided to send him a message telling him that I was ready to give him/us a try. His reply was very quick. A day later I visited him, and since then we have been inseparable!”
We appreciate the candor and degree of detail this couple brought to their interview. Obviously, few relationships breeze effortlessly from online introductions to full-blown love, but sometimes couples make it seem as though they do. Perhaps they don’t want to share the “warts and all” truth with the world! In any case, Annique and Jan shared honest insights into their courtship…
“I wasn’t that surprised when she refused me,” admits Jan. “I thought she was too pretty, and too young, for me. But I was deeply interested and still wanted to explain why I couldn’t reply to her messages. Around eight months later, she said she wanted to give me a second chance. That was the most positive and unexpected message I have ever received.”
In fact, as they mended fences and re-opened the lines of communication, the pair quickly made plans for an in-person meeting. “When she said she wanted to visit me with her two kids, I was soooo happy and super-excited,” says Jan. “I was praying and hoping that she’d like me. She planned to visit for a few hours, but her visit turned into a seven-day vacation! I didn’t want to let her go and I couldn’t imagine my life without her anymore.”
For their first date, they met at Jan’s house to watch a movie. “I though his pictures didn’t do justice to him,” says Annika of the moment she first laid eyes on Jan in the real world. “He was just too handsome, and pretty tall – just like my dream.” Jan remembers the moment fondly, declaring that, for him, “It was love at first sight!”
During those first few hours both were surprised at all of their “similarities.” They knew they didn’t want to be apart any longer than they had to. “We didn’t had a second date,” Jan says. “We stayed together because we knew we belonged to each other.”
The pair found they got along exceedingly well and made each other laugh, which is key. “He is the most honest and funny guy I have ever dated,” Annique notes. Building on that, Jan adds, “We have the same sense of humor. And she always eats all my candies ‘cause she is too lazy to go and get hers!”
We asked when they knew this relationship was more than a fleeting romance. “When he asked me if I could move into his place,” says Annique. Jan’s answer is “When her son came to hug me.” Today Annique is just as happy as can be. “I think Jan has brought joy and stability into my life,” she says. “He is my dream man... exactly the way I imagined my man would be. I’m just deeply in love with him.” The feeling is mutual. “She is perfect,” says Jan.
“I proposed on October 26, 2016 – six days after our very first date,” he tells us. “I was just about to believe I’d end up alone when this beautiful woman came and brought light into my life!”
Here are Annique’s encouraging words for singles. “The most important thing is really to open your eyes and take your time to read the messages you receive. Your other half could be right there in your mailbox. Also, don’t focus too much on profile pics. Jan is not so photogenic, and I nearly passed by the love of my life. In person Jan is really hot! He’s tall and has a beautiful heart.”
“Never give up,” Jan urges readers. “Sometimes it’s when you don’t expect it that the miracle happens. The most important thing is to be self-confident enough to write to that woman, the woman whom you think is the right match, even if you have the feeling that you have no chance at all. Write something more specific that shows how much attention you’ve paid to the person she is. A simple ‘hi’ is just too common, especially if you’re not the only one messaging her.”
Click here to read more inspiring interracial marriage stories.