…gender is one of the determining factors of interracial dating trends. Caucasian females are least likely to date Asian men, whilst white males in the U.S tend to be least attracted to female African American’s. – ‘Interracial Dating Trends’ by Matt Dating
Much as it is just a generalization, most of us do agree that there are very few White women who date Asian men. And when we try finding the reason for this, stereotypes and more stereotypes is all we dig up. But let’s look into the Black women White men interracial relationships: is attraction the reason why there are relatively fewer White men dating Black women? Really?
@Ichibod,
You are one of the FEW, people EVER, to have me laughing, and very hard I must say, this early in the morning!! Thanks my dear brother, I needed this laugh this morning!!!!!!!
Racist, crimson, optic voodoo demon, too funny! I’m hoping that this line will not be in my head all day!
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@bigeyes31,
I almost forgot to thank you for the compliment on yesterday, much appreciated! I try very hard to be nice to everyone, in my life away from this blog, as well as this blog, just treat people in the manner in which you want to be treated, and when you don’t think that you can do it, be still and be quiet.
I’ve learned more about myself and other’s over the years, simply by listening and really allowing some people to have the last word if they so desire. While they may be still talking, I’m listening to the ONE who really matters.
Have a great Wednesday!!!
godiva
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Godiva,
I thought that was funny, too. I remember when you approached her in all manner of love and respect regarding her language and attitude, and she just went off on you in a twisted tantrum. You have this humility thing down pat. I’m still working on it. I read everyone’s posts about up to 12 times line by line before responding to them. Some posts I’ve sent have taken 3 hours before submission due to proofreading, re-examining statements (in Hebrew and in Greek,lol) in order to give the benefit of a doubt. Other times, I just like to have fun a say what I think is funny from my perspective. I also remember how you came to me after those harsh words I said about you last year. That’s the type of correction and encouragement we all need from time to time. Love ya, Sis!
How are you feeling now? Breathing easier I hope.
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Ichibod,… I see you’re still going at it. I got tired of all the ‘read a book once’ geniuses, but, because you stuck your neck out for me, I wanted to drop some information. Not hyperbole, just plain simple facts not commonly known, and, which in one case diminishes a legacy, and in the other, just tarnishes it a bit, which in my opinion is needed, as I do not believe in making humans into God. I also tend to have a live and let live attitude in most cases, so please suffer my remarks. The one diminished, Mahatma Gandhi,(was a racialist)who had a chance to do a big thing and backed down. I don’t speak of South Africa, from where my grandad had to flee for telling racialists, things like,”When you were a baby, she had you at her teat,and you sucked and now you won’t walk down the street with her?”.(and Many other such things, so that as the Jan Smutts Government came into power, in spite of the fact that he had just been named the 1st Dean of the School of Pharmacy at Rhodes University, he had fought in WWI, his brother was a highly decorated DEAD war hero, and his brother-in-law, another DEAD war hero, by 1929, he realized he better get out of ‘jail free’, so he fled with his wife and my mom, and one trunk. All else was confiscated. Now Gandhi didn’t get involved with the rights for all, movement there, at least not to that extent,BUT, what he didn’t do, in spite of their leaders begging him to do so,years later in India,when his voice would have counted huge, was to say that the “untouchables” status,and for that matter, the whole caste system should be done away with.No, he turned his head. He told them to go away. They suffer harshly yet today. Sadly enough, that India remains the most segregated country in the world, or if not, is a medal contender.Of course their(“untouchables”) voices are never heard. In fact India, to hide inequalities unsurpassed over thousands of years, hides this small fact,yet once I heard,it is and will always be, a huge and never ending fact for me. Movies like ‘Slum Dog Millionaire’, (didn’t see it so I don’t know if it is plural)are made,to let us think,there is hope for all, but no, Brahmans marry only Brahmans, and so too do the other castes.They must never mix, or their children would be born “untouchables” and liable to the rapes, burnings of families and their relatives who complain of violence against them, and lynching is still a popular sport as well.{FYI…I really thought that you would want to know.} It is not a judgment against a people,but,it is a judgment against the system that is protected by the true practice of a religion,not like the bullshitting Wahhabi,Jama’at Islami, Taliban or ignorant types,who,unaware(and maybe purposely unaware) that Mecca was the capital of prostitution and other vices on that peninsula in the early years of Islam, or until Mohammad’s armies captures the city and freed the sex slaves, closing the brothels, giving women in Mecca and Medina a permanent set of rights which were to be used as a beginning, not an end , read passages that tell men and women to behave modestly,(one translates, telling women to “cover their charms”, i.e.their genitalia,and not to flaunt their breasts,not to wear transparent clothing, as the prostitutes were wont to do.These weak men find it easier to think that women were ordered to dress like ‘ninja’. That is just an utter falsehood, enforced by men who are afraid they cannot keep their women,and continue to act like the opening we have on our backsides.In point of fact, they saw the Byzantine female nobility cover up most of their bodies,even hiding their faces behind a veil, that commoners might not look upon them,and centuries later,when the Mongols came,slaughtering millions,and raping who they please,took more to the veil so that a Mongol soldier might,in a captured town,believe that t5his was an important woman, better leave her alone. And it worked. There is so much more, and I would happily debate anyone who is smart enough to understand when they are wrong about something.(Not an easy person to find) In this field, I am well read.Back to Gandhi in a round about way. It is well covered, in WWII, the second largest NAZI party was in India, with millions of members.Aryans !! That mind set is one reason Islam has so many followers and Christians, and other religions do well among those educated enough to understand paths out of the lower castes or the “untouchables”.(It is also claimed by the inhabitants of the south east regions of India, that St.Thomas journeyed there, and converted many. BUT, it is not easy to get people(even the oppressed) to change beliefs, especially when they are told that they,their former self, had to have done something terribly wrong for them to be born as low as they are,AND IF they want to get out of such an awful life,advancing in the next, grin and bear it. This information is available to a decent scholar, but, it stays out of the news for geo-political reasons.Cheap labor,free rape,murder without consequences,an economic benefit and no-fault crime for the high castes,who of course control the government,police, and army. A book,”Everything You Know Is Wrong”, will offer proofs if you need them, although I cannot remember is the bit about Gandhi, out of Indian History texts, or was it also mentioned in that book. Have a strong stomach, and bless you, if, after you find out, you speak the truth. The minor flaw about King Jr.,whom I idolized, and thus,though I was angry at him for a few years,still I kept the facts to myself, for people still needed him as a saint,(in spite of his womanizing which was known), was that while at Boston University, when writing his dissertation, he plagiarized enough of it, that had it been known at the time, he, or, ANYONE else caught doing so, would have been sanctioned, expelled, etc. . To me he did his penance. Perhaps it gnawed at his soul in moments when he felt tired or weak. I don’t know. I do know the music in his dreams and voice,and what he did, in my mind, wipe the slate.(You see I taught,and, I also did not get jobs that were given to people who did cheat. In fact, I was offered rather large sums of money, by people who wished a thesis,($10-15,000, depending on the field, $25,000 and up for a dissertation. From what I understand, it is very common now.That is sad,but,does to a degree explain the general incompetence,and gateways to corruption.Hungry as I sometimes was, I never even wrote a paper,(money there too)although I did read and critique, all of the above- for free. That’s different. I guess my judgment is based upon the fact that in one case, terrible things were and are justified(Gandhi), while in the other,there greatness of the latter acts, show a contrition few would dare. So even though they both were shot, King died because he was trying t6o do what Gandhi would not, extend equality to all, something that seems to be sadly missing from this site far too many times. You and I may be of different faiths, but, I believe the essence of our soul regarding the treatment of God’s creatures is not so far apart, if at all. As for me, you used Gandhi as an example,and I did not wish to see you so deceived.I do not even have to close my eyes to see little girls, cans of gasoline,the police assisting, or turning their heads, and it is thousands of people every year, and so, like the ancestors of both of us, at times enslaved, murdered, lynched,…the images linger. Bless you my cousin. Be guided, be protected, and be well.
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johnnybadboy,
Thank you. That was very theraputic. I’m no Ghandi fan, I just liked that quote. I found it some years back and it sort of stuck. I’ll have to check out that book, “Everything You Know Is Wrong”. Neat title.
Peace be unto you!
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I’m surprised that this post got so long without the entire article being posted. If it was posted you’d see that not only were Black women least desired by white men, Black men were least desired by white women and also Asian women by an equal amount. Just goes to show you that there is still much racism in the world.
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we may not like it but that is the way things are. Many are all too willing to sleep with black women for the experience but when it comes to getting married and having mixed children black women are lest desirable for the majority of white men. That’s why I am so happy for this site. Being on a regular site and dealing with constant rejection fully based on race is tough…at least here I know that is not the main issue and I am free to flirt like crazy without fear of discrimination
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ever body get help no BS its 2010 really the p is black and white lol so come on you like some one you like and thats that sorry
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After going through some of the posts, I’m thinking maybe one of the disagreemnts may have come from a typo error, maybe?
Comment by Wg110212 on 28 January 2010:
“As I was reading the responses, many of you have some very valid points and some of you are insecure or as some have said afraid.
I am a 40-year old black woman married to a 42-year old white man and believe me when I tell you he is all man. My “buns” as I call him because he has a nice butt, I know TMI, is from the old school. He opens doors, and gives gifts just because. If you all could see peoples expressions when he reaches his hand towards me to help me in and out of the car. We get a good laugh at the looks that we receive.
Because almost everyone here does not have an issue with skin color, I say this to you all; do not stop looking gentlemen. I say gentlemen because I too am a Christian and it is true, “A man that finds a wife finds a good thing and she is a blessing from the Lord.”
Women of color, stay white and white men stay black.”
—–
That was really a nice post, and I’m thinking the last sentence was simply a typo.
Could Wg110212 have meant to say Women of color stay black and white men stay white, and not even realise she made the error?
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@ RICK HAYES
You may get more prank calls than anything giving out your number like that. LOL
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Would there be a black or hispanic female unattatched and looking for “some male company?”
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I am a white guy formerly engaged to a beautiful black woman from Chad. We split up due to religion. I tried being muslim but could not believe it the more I learned about it. Now I am married to a Vietnamese woman and we had our first baby recently. I have been with white women of course. That is not important. I am not sure why but white men and black women do not go together much. it is very interesting seeing everyone’s thoughts.
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I am am ivory (white) former TV Sportscaster. Most females find me attractive, but I want to hook up with an ebony (black) female.
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@RICK HAYES,
Aren’t you the SAME RICK HAYES who on April 17th 2010 stated, “I want a date with a Hispanic, White, or Black woman, PREFERABLY the first two(Hispanic or White)????
Now here we are, some six days later, and you’re wanting to hook up with a black female!!!! How often does your preferences change? Every six or every seven days??
Whatever illegal drug(s) that you are ingesting, give them up, and check into REHABILITATION!!!!!
Or you could always do a Ben Rothelsberger, that’s a gaurantee to getting a date, and with your first two preferences!
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(Jumping in)
Hold up. I know this ain’t sweet Godiva jumping in his face like this.
Rick don’t let these nappy headed black women “push you” around. As soon, as you said former Sportscaster. The bitchassness hit a “code red”. She couldn’t help herself but “hate”.
This is the prime example of a sellout black woman’s “nature”. They got to “mess your game up”. Because they are a little jealous.
Personally, I am shocked Godiva did this. Seriously, I think sellout black women being desperate is at an epidemic rate.
I am sorry you were subjected to that.
I wish, they would try that shit with me.
Have a nice day.
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I am a White Anglo-Saxon Protestant (WASP). I would love to be intimate with a black female, age 21-55
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I would like to start out swapping computer-generated (CG) messages with a minority woman, age 21-55.
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Queens,
First off, I’m not sure as to why my comment towards Rick seems to have generated a response from you since you have said, many, many times, that you do not “go off” on people(black women) unless they say something deragatory about black men, or did you change the rules, yet again?
Second, isn’t it you who have also said many, many times, and I quote, “these sellout black women will let a white man say any and everything to them and never put these such white men in check”, end of quote”?
Third, Rick’s job title is totally irrelevant to me!! I’m not impressed, nor am I intimidated about what he may or may not do for a living, just as I am not in awe or intimidated by any man that has a degree, another myth. There are some people here that may only have a high school diploma, some may just have a GED, some of us have not one, but two degrees, it’s a great accomplishment but a degree just means that you were able to follow a higher education curriculum, met the requirements, and you received a degree, nothing more, nothing less!
A degree, or a certain profession does not mean that a person holding such a degree, or a certian job is a person of integrity, or honor or a person that will be respected!
You said I couldn’t help but hate? I don’t hate anyone and I certainly wouldn’t hate someone who is literally BEGGING for the company of a woman. To me that’s pretty desperate!
I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt when he first posted six days ago but when he came back with the blatant disrespect, I decided to respond, which is my right to do so, or should I check in with you to get permission on when, and who I can speak to???
I have tried many times to respect you, even when I don’t agree with you. Is it too much to ask that you try and respect other’s as well? Please tell me what is so difficult about treating people in the manner in which you want to be treated? Why do you have to be so antagonistic all the time? Do you not know at all, any tenderness or love?
It’s okay Queens, the more you hate on me, the more I’m going to pray for you and love you, in spite of you!!
Now I’ll let this go because I know you are dying to respond back, so you can put me in my place, tell me how awful I am and on and on and on!!!!
Have a great weekend!
love
godiva
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(Leaning back)
Look at Godiva. Somebody here woke up on the wrong side of the bed.
You make some good points. However, it is out of “character” for you to say this. I kind of hold you to a “higher standard” like most of the men in here do.
You are correct that I said those thing. I just thought it was “unlike” you to lash out at this particular man.
I really don’t understand how Rick even got “under your skin”. UNLESS, you know Rick personally. I have seen some things happen on the board. But I rarely see you “go off like this”.
I hear you on the man begging for company. However, how does that affect you?
Plenty of men say things and “you let it go”.
Na, the end part of your post showed the old Godiva.
I was just trying to figure out why Rick caught your wrath!
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Hey, Im Half WASP. IS that OK…lol
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Queens,
Rick is on here looking for a booty call only, and if that’s what he wants, then so be it, however I did not appreciate the the fact that even in his so called looking for a date disguise, how he disrespected black women by saying white or hispanic first, but now that his true colors are showing(booty call), it’s only black women that he’s mentioning. Surely you of all people should understand why I responded to him. Why should he get a free pass for being disrespectful? He is no better than you, me, or any
other black person here!!
Yes Mr. Queens, you are right, there are plenty of times when both men and women have said things, and I let it go, I can’t say you are lying about that, but I have my reason(s) for keeping silent. If you ever want to ask me directly why I respond or don’t respond, you can ask me, okay.
I know you think that I am weak because I refuse to get into this craziness here, but I’m not weak, but I’m also not a big talker, never have been. I have three sisters who yak, yak, all the time. I take after my father, who was laid back, the strong silent type.
Truth be told Mr. Queens, it makes me sick to my stomach, and it saddens my spirit to hear and witness some of the comments and the behavior’s here, especially the exchange between black people!
We are so much more than what we portray and it’s too many intelligent, and for the most part, good hearted people to behave in this manner, which is the main reason why I do stay silent. It used to be a time when we could talk to each other, and now more than ever we should try harder, everyday to get back on the right track for many reasons, and right now my mind is drifting to young black male that I had to bag and tag, the 6th one this month, so yeah the arguing over the silly things such as white men, is not a priority for me!!!!!!!! I do hope that you try and understand where I’m coming from.
No, I didn’t get up on the wrong side of the bed, everyday that I wake up, and my heart beats, I can see, I have a beautiful home, and a family that loves me, and so many people that I love and adore, and that includes you, I have no reason to be sour or complain about anything!
I’m a nice person, I’ll give you the shirt off my back, but even I have my limits, and Rick was way out of line!
love
godiva
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Dear Godiva
I agree with you. I contribute to the madness, I must admit. Damn, young men dropping dead like that.
Sometimes, blogging is just an entertainment. I call it reality entertainment.
I actually think the blogs are more civilized than what you see on television.
I saw the dateline “panel” talking about why professional black women can’t find a good man. I watched a glimpse of it and it got really “heated”.
The thing that is interesting there is never no ‘white men” there. How about their “input” on the panels. Personally, I think they do it for ratings and to see black people fight.
I generally like the people here. Some people think I got vendettas.
I just thought it was uncharacteristic of you to say that.
Rick just hit a “nerve’ with you for some reason. I don’t know if it is “personal” with him or not.
I just had a debate with some Mormons. It was pretty heated. They take to kindly to me not believe some of their scriptures. I stumped them with my questions. Why do they believe a flawed Joseph Smith is their prophet is beyond me.
Godiva it is good to see a feisty side to you.
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I dont know why I have got an email-notification on that topic since I cannot remember that I have ever commented to this topic.
Whatever, I read an interesting question I would like to answer:
Question from Faerydust
“That was very interesting reading. I wish there had been more responses from white men, on what they find attractive or unattractive about black women. We got much feed back from black women and black men, but very little from white men”
Well, I just can speak for my self, I was attracted to black woman since I am attracted to women generally.
I love the athletic shape, the big lips, the curvature, the way they smell and of course the dark tan.
Altough my taste for black women changed through a bit, they are still my favorite.
There are some asians and latinas I fancy too and I prefer “black-non african descent”, but how I said – black is still my favorite and I cannot imagine to married to something else.
I also got some friends who like than and usually if they like black, they are crazy for black as I am. That my be due to the fact that we have almost none here in Austria/Europe and if they are fresh from Africa and not really what white men are attracted too.
Also the mentality and livestyle of the africans differs completly from the way we are.
Hope that answer was helpfully.
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Well, this is quite an interesting and informative topic to say the least. I just wanted to say to Triccinicci, you answered or should i say Clobbered “Mixi” in your response to his obvious ignorance. I think he is aother blk man finding a way to degrade yet again blk women of this country. As the younger generation would say now a days; He got OWNED!! Good Job. Welcome to the site by the way. Love reading your posts.
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Very interesting brawl I have stumbled across, here…
However, my paltry two cents on the initial topic are rather simple.
People are people are people.
Attraction is unique, and influenced by both nature and nurture. My French mother and Nigerian father poorly prepared me for the racism I would encounter in the world, because it was such a non-issue in our home and family.
So I was understandably confused, the first time a school-friend informed me that since I was mixed, I had the option to date white OR black men.
It had never occurred to me before then that not everyone had the option. I assumed, in my sheltered naivete that we all had the choice to date whomever we wished, color aside, as a veritable non-issue.
I find here, however, virtually the same discussion with (occasionally) more mature vocabulary.
I have dated across the human spectrum, my only requirements a mutual attraction, sense of integrity and intelligence.
The black men that approached me were typically well-dressed, well-educated, and well-spoken. Anyone initiating a sentence with “Damn, shawty,” was shut down immediately. Thugs, no matter the race are a personal peeve of mine.
However, the black men I dated expressed concern or (in one case) a flat refusal to introduce me to their families. My skin was too light.
Of course, the opposite was also true. I live in the South, so it was more common for me to have tough experiences with the white men than any other. I find too often the whole, “I’ve never dated a BLACK GIRL before,” experience equally disconcerting. I am a biracial female. I embrace BOTH cultures that I was raised in. I refuse to choose.
But I fault no one, should he fail to find my biraciality attractive.
I get that we each have random and quirky requirements that get that special “wow” factor when eying a potential mate.
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I just came across this blog and started to read..interesting how little some of the comments have to do with the topic and how intolerant others are.
Well, I am white (grown in Europe) and lived most my professional life- 20odd years- outside of Europe in Asia, Africa, USA, Canada and on several Caribbean Islands. I lived, obviously, in black communities and have lived with black women. First and foremost I have to say:people are people,whoever they are; when it comes down to the basic needs we are all the same -we need clothe, shelter, food, company.
Of course, that does not address the issue of why white man would or would not date black women, in “our” society that is.
@Hannes,go to any African country and you will find as many extremely beautiful women as anywhere in the world. Your comment about black women of none African descent -contradictory in itself unless you talk about dark (black) Asian or Native Australian women- is childish and tells me that your are clueless about black women.
I, for one, lived with an African woman for 4 years and only broke up because my assignment in the country came to an end and she did not want to leave her beautiful country (Tanzania); not even had I married her. (I had many other relationships with black women and ended up marrying and divorcing an Asian woman and am blessed with two beautiful, and racially speaking mixed, children.)
Living on an Caribbean Island now and working in the Tourist industry, I am very happy to see that interracial couples are not the exception anymore. AND I bet my last penny that five or six generations from now we will not have this discussions any longer – we will all have become “interracials”. Many countries are a bit further ahead: Jamaica’s national slogan, for example, is “out of many one people” and on most other Island there is no one race anymore, it is all one big pot out of which people come, and skin colour does not play any significant role, especially not when it comes to dating.
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@Jabavar
believe me, I had black women since I am 17 and now I am 37.
You think you know something about it because if the few you had.
If you put an african black female and a black female who raised in Europe next to eachother, it will be no comperism in style and attitude.
Of course there are some very beautiful ones in Africa but I was talking gernerally. If you line up 10 girls from Africa, at least 9 of them will totally differ from what a white european is after.
Even my african friends (mostly nigerians) advice me – dont go with the nigerian women, you will never get love from them, papers and money is what they are after.
As for my own experience, most of them are really how my friend said.
My experience with black latinas are totally different.
They know about dirty sex, and thats what they are after, if you look good you are in the game. If not, even money cannot bring you in.
But of course, that are just my own experience.
To come back to the point, usually I am not attracted to african women if they are fresh from africa.
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@Hannes
Well, I guess we are talking about different things here. You talk of people who left there respective countries to seek a better life elsewhere -the term in German would be “Wirtschaftsfluechtling”, which has no equivalent in the English language. For them to be used and abused in their country of origin is part of everyday life and that is what they expect from people and circumstances they meet anywhere in the world. (And reading your comments that is what they should expect, hence there reactions.) Nigeria is also a predominantly Muslim country and the status of women in general is rather abysmal. But that does not negate the point I am going to make since in the circles I meet Nigerians, or anyone for that matter, there is certainly no difference in appearance, look, or as you call it style and attitude. If anything these people outshine the others in most respects as far as grace, posture and style is concerned. I am talking about people (in this case women) of equal status to Europeans or Americans or wherever anyone might be from. A person with a university degree, who has traveled and is somewhat familiar with different cultures, in short, with some level of sophistication.
(I am explaining this rather lengthy because, unfortunately for you, these are folks you will never meet or if, they would not give the likes of you a first, let alone a second look.)
The second point you are making about having known black women for the last 20 years is rather a sad one. You mean to say that you used black underprivileged, in most cases perhaps desperate women for your pleasure and enjoyment. Knowing a person is something different altogether, at least in my books. AND the topic of discussion is “white men dating black women” not “sleeping with black women”. How many of these black women you used would you have introduced as your girlfriend to your friends or family???
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I do not care what othetr people do I do not date black women because they are black that means they have different veiws and beliefs and yes they have a different culture, no it is not juvenile to decide who you will date based on culture arabs asians muslims and jews do it all the time in some countries you are forbidden from dating outside your race. The color of eyes hair and skin are all a turn off for me. Some people use religion to decide who to date.
The physical features of black women turn me off the nose and lipps coarse hair and generally they are too fat not to mention that as a race they are loud and rude they do a good job of faking manners but you always see them yelling at cops on tv why is that I am nurse and when I work night shift it is always the black nurses and aides who are talking the loudest disturbing pationts.
the last thing that is a turn off is that as a race they think they are better or deserve special treament just because they are black they put a balck man in charge and he does not have the balls to do anything no one wants his healthcare except the welfare bums. of course he is only half black we know this because no black person would ever use the word responsability in is not in their third grade vocabularies I was born white and that is why I date white women who were born in the unioted states I have that right and no one should be able to tell me to do something different
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@ white is right :
Thank you.. thank you for not dating black women.
LOL!!!
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Umm, White is right….
Just what makes YOU think every other woman except your own wants you? Why are so many of them flocking to Black men? That’s what you need to be focusing on.
Get ta work on that right there, k?
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Unfortunately, you can never really trust statistics 100%, they are always going to be at least slightly slanted one way or another.
I’m a white guy, and there are many black women I find myself attracted to. I find a sexy black woman way more attractive than a sexy white one. I also am more attracted to latino girls than white girls. I don’t know what it is, I just don’t dig the blonde/blue look and pale skin. If a white girl has brown eyes and dark hair and a darker complexion, then I might be interested.
Besides looks, it’s also the difference in culture that appeals to me. I find differences in ways and customs very intriguing. I think it’s also partly the cultural identity. I’m a european mutt, and I find girls with stronger ties to their heritage very, very interesting and sexy.
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I have been VERY VERY VERY happily married to a wonderful man from Sweden for 8 years. I am an African American woman. He said that when he was in his 20′s he and his friends lived in an apartment building where one of the apartments was occupied by a black woman and a white man. He said that every time that he and or his friends saw her passing by they would melt, he thinks they all were in love with her, like she was a movie star or something. It was from her that he craved the beautiful dark skin that he says is so sexy on a woman. I absolutely adore this man as he adores me. I want for nothing. We have gone to Sweden to meet his friends and family, they were crazy about me. His friend’s wife told me that she is so happy that he found someone so nice as he is such a kind man… I can go on and on.
But I do like white men, just something I felt inside, my first husband was black because for some reason my family thought I was confused about my choice and I tried to pacify them. I was so miserable! As Woody Allen said, the heart wants what it wants.
As for American white men. It is a fact that black woman on the whole do not like white men. Perhaps it came from the rapes during slavery and or the fact that we can exercise our free will and first thing is to despise the very thing that tortured us: WHITE MEN. SO WHITE MEN(AMERICAN I MEAN) shocked that any woman on earth as a whole does not think they are God’s gift. And like men who are snubbed by certain women they turned it around and blacks and whites BELIEVE that crap that they are not interested in black women. Bull Pucky. White men have this secret desire for black women, but are terrified of rejection more than worrying about problems with society. One white man I dated said 95% of black women turn him down and 75% of them tell him about his white ass. But he said “I live for the 5%!”
Look for clubs for black women and white men. That is where I got my Swedish prince.
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karen you are a lucky lady i loved reading it but unfortunately i dont so much buy into some of the reasonings. especially some of the negative aspects, but i do believe its all about preference. some people think its about looks( which is controversial enough so i wont go there )and to someit is but it is all preferance. to those who can stand behind their choices like an adult but to those who cant is where you get your “secret desires” which i had for a long time until i grew up. unfortunately for me our black population over here i do not think is large enough for a club like that but if you ever here of one please let me know. and again it is nice to read about the positive stories for a change.
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ps ladies if you find a real man that loves you his color wont matter he will treat you like a queen everyday
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I like your answer looking4life!!
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Hmmmm…
I would say stereotypes are the cause for so few black woman/white man relations. I believe most white men perceive black women as loud, chip on their shoulder, etc. I think most black women perceive white men as a push overs, little dicks, etc. Speaking as a white man, these stereotypes are not true, these stereotypes have not held true for any of the black women I have seen in the past, nor for the woman I am currently dating.
Until notions and generalizations stop being perpetuated and people get smart…
I dont think the statistics will show much of a change.
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very well said, Asleep
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It is obvious to me that the messages posted here by non-Americans reflect more balanced point of view.
That may be because in their countries of origin therewas nothing like the terrible history of American racism.
But for Black and White Americans it’s different.
Our real enemy is history, and the way to beat that enemy begins with an understanding of that fact.
Racism is racism, and at this point I would be happy if even 5% of the American people embraced an Interracial future for America!
Anyone foolish enough to believe that white men find black women least attractive deserves the negative thoughts that such belief plants in their heads. As that beautiful lady who quoted Plato on this site (I loved my ancient Greek philosophy class)seemed to be saying, “Get out of the cave!”
It is simple for a white man who wants to marry a black woman…just acknowledge that white racism has been a fact (if not one of THE facts)of American history and accept its repercussions… not out of a sense of personal guilt but as something that increases your humanity and your ability to understand and maintain your relationship with the Black woman you love.
It doesn’t make you a bad person to accept an historical truth!
Regarding those repercussions and the attempts of even the most loving IR couple to navigate in and through American society: that same IR couple can not only deal with it but even strengthen their love for each other because of it.
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thank you cyrilg…..
“…just acknowledge that white racism has been a fact (if not one of THE facts)of American history and accept its repercussions….not out of a sense of personal guilt but as something that increases your humanity.”
“……It doesn’t make you a bad person to accept an historical truth!”
Those two statement alone stand as a proof to things truly changing…..anyone that doubts the ability of a “white man” to view things in a realistic manner would have to come up with something else after reading your post.
Peace PEOPLE
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I totally agree with you both that things are changing overall. Having gone to live down south for a number of years for school showed me that the south has some catching up to do!! The big cities are better in not being racist but the smaller towns are still highly resistant. When I worked at the abused children’s home north of Phili, I was good friends with a black gentleman who worked with me and we became great friends. I was appalled when I heard his story though. He used to live in Tennessee and he was in a mostly redneck area that was white. The prettiest white girl in that town fell in love with him which is totally understandable because he was handsome, educated, charming, and had a heart of gold and was an outstanding Christian who truly lived his Christianity out. He was the only one who wasn’t trying to have sex with her or try to get her pregnant before marriage unlike the horny redneck white guys!! They got married and he literally had to take his family and flee out of the state because they were jealous and going to lynch him. he moved up to PA and had a beautiful baby girl and they were a very happy well adjusted couple who had true love and morals. It was my honor to work with him and the last I heard as I left to go back to school was he moved up to a really high position in the Bethanna organiation(the name of the Children’s home) and was doing quite well. That just brought tears to my eyes seeing how happy they were and how well they were all doing.:-) But I cringe when I see what he had to go through to be happy and move away from where he was born and I still see much racism in small southern white towns. And it wasn’t just towards blacks but Latinos as well. I hope the entire country becomes as enlightened as your two statements above.:-)
Joseph Moyer
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I will never understand why anyone in this day and age can say that someone’s faith has to do with whether they are good or bad. Have we learned nothing. Does anyone read history, taking a balanced viewpoint these days. As for “horny redneck white guys”, am I the only one that can see that it too is a racialist terminology. As for the statement, “The big cities are better in not being racist”,are you sure you really want to say that. No matter where I have been on this place, it is a sad fact that race can easily become an issue. Go and try to marry a female anywhere, and you will find males who do not like it, basically because of your race. Not all, but, some. As I have stated on this site before, and I did do serious research on the topic, i.e. no internet, primary and secondary sources, heavy on the primary. Both the terms white and black, were brought into common usage,to aid a racist agenda. The origins are early 18th century,although,there is 17th century propaganda that foreshadows this. This ideology continues to this day. The division aimed at is people with(depended on area) 1/64th % African blood, to 1/16th % African blood. These people would be defined as “black”. Ironically, to be an American Indian, it works the opposite way, encouraging inbreeding. One tribe asks for 2/3s. That is difficult, do the math. On the other hand, one of the longest blood feuds, the ‘Scotia’ and the ‘Narmen’, a battle that has lasted 1500 years is ignored, and the two groups are lumped together as ‘white’,in spite of the fact that apartheid laws were imposed upon the Scotia who tried to remain free, and lasted longer than the history of this country, colonies and all. Yet they are both white. Yet in the West Indies, the Scotia married Africans, both were used as slaves, and the Scotia were sentenced to slavery because of their race, not crimes. Again. Let us advance a bit, ridding ourselves of the terms, black,white,Hispanic,and people of color. The Kings of Portugal and Spain were both at one time considered Hispanic, yet controlled the slave trade in Africans, and the even deadlier(by documented percentages who died in less than two years)trade in North, South, and Central American Indians. They are still the underclass of the Americas, no matter what you hear about casinos.As for our notions about race, I don’t know how much is willful ignorance, for there are benefits, even if they are only polemical, and the separation of the downtrodden, no matter what the hue of their skin, continues. I have always been attracted to women in every ethnic group I know, and I love it. There are beauties everywhere. Meanwhile, the rich, and the super rich sit in their clubs and laugh at how stupid and easy to fool we as a majority divided into minorities are. Wake up, we are all scum to those on top.
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As for the south, I spent 12 years down there and I am simply stating what I observed from a psychological perspective. But I do like you history lesson because it shows how you really can’t label anyone and that is they way it should be. Everyone should be taken as an individual. My only point being as far as calling some individuals horny rednecks, I have talked to many people of all races when I was down there that weren’t white and/or were from all around the world and they seemed to concur that there was truth in the stereotypes of horny white rednecks. That is why movies such as Deliverance and the last part of Pulp Fiction strike such a chord in many of us because we have known a horny white redneck ourselves. Hell, when I was down there, I looked the part and fit in a little too well even though I didn’t act horny. I was more accepted sadly down there than I am up north where I was born and raised and have come back to!!
And as far as faith, mine heritage comes from the Anabaptists who were tortured and murdered for their faith during the Reformation by the Catholics and Martin Luther’s followers. I you really love History so much, read the actual account of over a thousand Anabaptists that were tortured, men, women and children and martyred that is a book of pure fact and documented called Martyr’s Mirror and tell me what you think then about faith not influencing goodness. It is a long read but well worth it and famous in my Christian tradition and agreed upon to be totally authentic even my non-Christians and people who are anti-Christian. THOSE were the truly good people and if we could live up to a mere fraction of their goodness and faith, then the problems of the world would pretty much go away. Read it first before you respond back as well as Will and Spirit and The Wounded Healer. When you read all three of those books, then get back to me if true faith makes a person good or bad. Martyr’s Mirror is considered to be a historical book first and not a religious one because it simply states objectively those Anabaptists that the writer interviewed and what they said during their ordeal and then the tortures and death and all their death certificates have been validated for that time period. So like I said, if you love History so much and pride yourself on knowledge of it, you have to read this book to round yourself out because it is a unique one in what it reports. And I agree with you about the rich and the super rich but I believe they are the real scum in actuality.
Joseph Moyer
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And oh, if you really want to argue religion, there is a guy on another blog that was not thrilled when I supported Obama. He is a big Glen Beck fan who is a fundamental Christian speaker. You would get a better argument from him on faith and goodness than from me if you want a mainstream view because I am Mennonite and not considered a mainstream Christian religion.;-) I think it was a blog on how white men are attracted more to black women or something. That would be interesting to see you two people hash out the faith issue since like I said, I don’t represent mainstream Christianity.
Joseph Moyer
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lol…..still at it I see. “Faith” HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH “GOODNESS”. Many a “cross-burner” has held the Bible higher than most. If you think you know so much about history then it really shouldn’t be a debate here. People, “good” and “bad” have done things in the name of religion…..some of those actions have resulted in “righteous” AND “evil” outcomes. The reason I use so many quotation marks is it is all relative and subjective here. What one deems as “moral” I am sure another will find fault. I ask you again, (as I did in post that were CONVENIENTLY removed)…..what if the so-called Christian (WHATEVER THE DENOMINATION) was eating babies in his/her basement???? And would this person be seen as “better” than an Agnostic/Atheist that gives time and money to charities that SAVES THOSE BABIES????
I really think there is a time and place for everything…and the fact that you see fit to bring religion/Christianity into every blog thread here speaks volumes. Telling someone that they have to read 3 (NOT 1, but THREE…LOL) books before they respond to you is ridiculous. Where do you get off telling people when, where or how they can repsond to you. Your narcissism knows no bounds, huh…..lol. I mean you write your post as if you SERIOUSLY expect this person to take you so seriously as to invest time reading books that are no doubt skewed to your point of view before they “respond” to you…..DUDE!!!! GET OVER YOURSELF HERE. Even if the person is a student of history this is not necessarily a blog that speaks to all that (ESPECIALLY THE RELIGIOUS aspect of what you are shoving down our throats…and YES, as this is NOT a religious board, YOU ARE SHOVING IT).
You sidestepped his question/point (“I will never understand why anyone in this day and age can say that someone’s faith has to do with whether they are good or bad.”) but I will pose it again. Where have you seen in YOUR OWN PERSONAL EXPERIENCE an example of someone’s faith SINGULARLY making them a better person than one who does not have a particular faith??????
Peace PEOPLE
tatted2death
P.S. Before you even start that madness again, YOU AND I BOTH know that I AM NOT ATTACKING YOU. I am simply asking a general question that DOES NOT require anyone running to any book……THIS IS ABOUT CURRENT, PERSONAL EXPERIENCE……PERIOD.
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Your post is full of insults and yet you claim you are not attacking me? If you are really interested, why don’t you ask me privately? And I have seen people’s faith making them better people that people without faith countless times. Nathan and his wife Pamela who have a church in Richmond that I attended. They were also black. Also in Baltimore, Pastor Jackson who ran an all Black Presbyterian church. Tim Bentch who is an opera singer and missionary in Russia with his family. Shin-Mai and her husband who is a Pastor, Hsue-eh and their family. They are Taiwanese. I have known people all over the world and locally. I have seen countless individuals. But this is moot because you really don’t want to know. You are just a hater towards me and I wish you would kindly stay on topic and leave me alone. Thank you kindly.
Joseph Moyer
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Like I said before, I am not a mainstream Christian. If you want to understand my views, read books on Anabaptism which spawned the Amish, Mennonites, Quakers, and Brethren in Christ. Anabaptists are different in their view of Christianity than any other Christian view. So read those books and read Martyr’s Mirror and then you can argue MY religion with me. Otherwise you have me totally confused with other Christians. So I can’t defend Christianity as a whole. After you have read all that and understand me and my religion offends you, then I won’t bring it up again in any blogs. It is the center of my life and views so it is hard not to incorporate it into the blog topic. Maybe it would be better if I do bring in Christianity, that I say my denomination of Christianity so you don’t think I represent Christianity as a whole. Thank you kindly for any consideration.
Joseph Moyer
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Am familiar with Anabaptist, Cathir, Arian,and dozens of other mass murders committed by the Roman Church. Protestant Churches also for the most part have nothing to brag about. There have always been rather small(in numerical terms, compared with what is seen by most as the mainstream Christianity)Moravians,and other none violent Christian groups, and even Christian groups that go back to the 2nd century,at the latest Anno Dominum, who accept Jesus as the most important Prophet, but,maintain no human can be God. I am well aware of what happened to the Anabaptists, whether in Czarist Russia or elsewhere. As for me, I am blacklisted from teaching history, because I don’t pull punches. Sometimes I found things out about groups always assumed to be victims so terrible, that I verified the information, and sealed my lips, not wishing to add more reasons for violence in the world. I also regard science as a religion, or rather as a group of competing religions, as they meet the litmus test whether they protest or not. My point was, as I assume you rightly saw, enough is enough. Let us stop labeling everyone. In prior times, race referred to what we now call ethnic groups, or even tribes. I think their thinking far more advanced than our society’s. As for the scum remark, I guess I was not clear enough. Although it is on very rare occasions, possible to become rich without hurting others, that is almost too rare to count. Recently, Gates got Buffet to agree to give away most of his money. Even if this group,now about 40 or 60 billionaires do such a thing, it is in the making that they prolong evil. That people must choose between medicine or food or heat is a crime against humanity… so too, the urging of people to have huge families they can in no way support, and that diminish the right of God’s other created things to be or to live. It is blasphemy to destroy the plant searching for wealth. We, as responsible regents, as most religions claim as a right for humans, need to reduce our numbers. This does not have to mean abortions or abstinence. My wife and I prayed for and received two children, a number that will actually reduce population if all would stick to it. There are plants that God gave, as well as other forms of natural birth control that work, but, are not allowed to be taught because some people claim that God has given them the date for an event that would make human population control needless. I find that blasphemous. As for my being on this “channel”, I joined this group because I understand that the mixing of ethic groups is healthy, both mentally and physically. What is sad, is what so many mixed blood children and adults have to go through. I was shocked at first to find so much hatred at this site. I had hoped that it was much more advanced than the greater part of the world’s population. I suppose that some of these debates are needed, though I always wish for more honesty(reflecting on no individual at this point)and a great deal more deeper thought. Bless you all. Let us make of this site and inspiration, not a war ground. May you walk in peace.
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WOW! I am not one to take time and read about these subject (debates?), but this truly grabbed my interest. So much to digress back on all that has been shared and will need time to read. Really fascinating to say the least.
I don’t do ‘facebook’, twitter, or for that matter any of the social inter netting.
Women of color? How can you NOT find them so fulfilling? Thats for another entry. Must read all before me.
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It would be a pleasant contribution to see more of: Comment by Faeydust on 11 October 2009
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