Whether or How to disclose an STI when dating online
Even at the best of times, dating can be pretty complicated. Now, imagine what it can be like when you have an incurable sexually transmitted infection (STI). Facing the humiliation, people’s ignorance and rejection can be quite oppressing for sufferers trying to penetrate the dating arena, no matter how positively they may want to live their lives.
We are living in an era where people come clean about so many things on their online dating profiles; sexual orientation being the big reveal at the moment. I came across a few profiles of individuals who had declared openly that they are HIV positive – no photos though – but I guess that is understandable. But I am thinking, when you come across a profile “Hi, I am a very hot and loving woman who has been living with Herpes for 4 years now………..” See those dots after that sentence? I bet that is what most of us see after the mention of “Herpes”.
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When you leave it for a few weeks then maybe reveal it, most prospective mates become faced with the trust issues and RUN!!! They feel they were being led on. When you let it scream on your profile or reveal this during the initial contact, a big chunk will walk away. I guess that is why we have dating sites designed for singles living with STIs. So here, you freely list the condition you have along with your eye color and hobbies.
Well, one health adviser told her patient after meeting a new guy she liked: "Just say to him, 'I have HIV,' and don't add anything. He'll either deal with it or run away. He might need time to think about it."
So it got me thinking, are there more of us who have STIs on the site but choose to withhold this information because of the stigma that still surrounds these infections? When should one disclose this when dating online and how? Should such personal health status be listed on our profiles?
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