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Who Ever said "Romance is Dead"?

Posted by Leticia, 24 Aug

In case no one has told you yet..."Happy Romance Month!" You'd think that as a nation, we'd be a little less stressed out if we celebrated half the special days and holidays that have been created. For example, did you know that in addition to Romance Awareness month, August is also; admit you're happy month, national eye exam month, national golf month, family fun month, national blueberry month, national Catfish month and national picnic month? Me either.

Well, since this is a "dating" site, we'll focus on Romance Awareness month this time and since this is also a "multicultural" dating site, the question on my mind is, do you think one race is "more romantic" than another? Now I'll answer for myself but I really want to hear what you've got to say, cause truth be told, Leticia is only one woman and although I have no issue dating every ethnicity known to man, there is just not enough time in my day. So, let's start with what I've heard.

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I've heard that black guys are not very romantic just highly sexual and yes, there is a difference. If you are Italian or Spanish hands down romance appears to be in your blood and well white guys fall somewhere in the middle. Now my experience tells me a little different.

When I was in college during a trip to Italy, my roommate and I met a couple of Italian guys in Rome. Perhaps time was the issue, only time for making out in front of a church and missing the curfew at the youth hostel. Not very romantic, but I did find my Italian stud to be filled with passion and excitement. Now in Florence it appeared to be the same zest and love of life that attracted this young guy to me. He followed me around the train station speaking in Italian confessing his love for me and my beauty. Having only taken two years of Spanish, my translator was this African guy that was smitten with my roommate. While I was trying to hide from my little Italian suitor, he was busy trying to talk my roommate into coming to his county and even though they were "different shades of brown", he would be able to convince his family to take her in...(he probably thought he was being romantic).

Just when I thought I was safe from my Italian stallion, I turned a corner and all I saw was a tongue coming straight toward my face. As my roommate and I boarded the train two hours later, he was still there waving goodbye. Now if you take away my absolute fear and utter disgust (he was NOT my type), that would have been very romantic situation to me.

Now I'm sure that we all have our own ideas of what romance is. For some it's the candles, flowers and slow music. For others its time spent attention given. I once had a boyfriend pack my lunch for work and when I opened the bag, he had cut off the bread ends (I don't like them), and put in a little note saying have a great day. I've also had the blindfold, car ride that led to a secluded spot with the rose petals in the bath and all my favorite things prepared just for me. These guys just happened to be black. So, I guess that's why I'm asking what your experience has been, because I can't call it. It seems that if given the time and opportunity all my guys of different nationalities have been romantic in their own way. Not enough for me to say one over the other.

Whatever your preference is when it comes to dating and no matter what your idea of romance is. Be sure to celebrate it this month and the next and the next. While you're at it... you should go ahead and "admit you're happy and take the family out for some fun, have everyone's eyes examined, then go out for a round of golf (miniature acceptable), and wrap up the day with a great big picnic with blueberry's and catfish".

Celebrate life and I bet you...romance will be in the air.

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Responses to "Who Ever said "Romance is Dead"?"

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  1.   ashley says:
    Posted: 14 Sep 06

    i dont think that there are any good men left ....seriously

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  2.   desiree says:
    Posted: 14 Sep 06

    its all about stepping out of ur box and taking the blinders that u have on to the world. things are amazing, bright, and beautiful. AR is a wonderful place because its reassuring to know that there are common ideas and point of views.

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  3.   Arnisca says:
    Posted: 14 Sep 06

    I often feel romance is dead but deep down inside I'm hoping my prince with come along and sweep me off my feet.

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  4.   sety says:
    Posted: 12 Sep 06

    Romance isn't dead at all. and some of us are meeting very romantic people here so keep up the good work

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  5.   sety says:
    Posted: 12 Sep 06

    I'm Italian, i think this site is the number one for connecting people

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  6.   ebonybeautyj says:
    Posted: 12 Sep 06

    Romance is alive and well!!

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  7.   jckappa says:
    Posted: 11 Sep 06

    I guess the women here aren't romantic. Or do all the women expect romance to be a one way street?

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  8.   lizzy2005 says:
    Posted: 10 Sep 06

    I believe that all races have romance within their cultural norms. It may vary of course. I think it is more down to the individual guy and his personality. If a person can be strong and not conform to the common stereotypes of being a 'man' and breaking free from the traditional constraints that being male can place on him. Then they can let their romance and love shine threw. What a shame to hide such qualities!

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  9.   jckappa says:
    Posted: 09 Sep 06

    So Fala you tie romance and love together?

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  10.   romeoluvs says:
    Posted: 09 Sep 06

    Romance Rocks.. I believe in it completely..

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  11.   Fala says:
    Posted: 09 Sep 06

    Romance will exist as long as people fall in love.

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  12.   euroecuboy says:
    Posted: 08 Sep 06

    Romance is still alive!! those who say its dead need to look into the person they are with...

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  13.   kenyanito says:
    Posted: 08 Sep 06

    Romance is alive 24/7. It doesn't matter what colour you are. One needs to experience it to get a defination. Kenya

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  14.   Carla says:
    Posted: 07 Sep 06

    Romance is not a sterotypical thing...doesnt have anything to do with race...has to do with the person...My father was a great person...he was white of course but not a romantic at all...my ex husband was black and was a hopeless romantic....but I know whites who are and blacks who are and vice versus...romance is a state of the heart...and a state of mind...

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  15.   silky9red says:
    Posted: 07 Sep 06

    Each of us has our own way for being romantic. What we have to do is find the right person who can spark that romantic part inside us to want us to bring it out without hesitation. When we find that person, then we will know they are the one.

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  16.   IsleOfCapri says:
    Posted: 07 Sep 06

    Romance is alive, just not in all people. Some men have to be taught how to be romantic, others, it just comes naturally to. Romance comes in all forms, not just flowers. It's the way a person makes you feel, good about yourself, loved, adored. We should teach our children to love, not to play video games about war.

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  17.   Mystify24 says:
    Posted: 07 Sep 06

    I believe romance varies person from person. Just like some people can sing and some can't. I don't think it has anything to do with race or sex...Not all women are romantic. Personally I can be romantic if I choose to be and when I am it's usually based on what my man likes and his personal taste. I've always hoped the man I'm dating would do the same for me... BUT I've never had that happen.

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  18.   jckappa says:
    Posted: 06 Sep 06

    I've noticed everything discussed revolves around the man being romantic. Let's discuss the women now!

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  19.   TrueHarmony says:
    Posted: 05 Sep 06

    I think that each individual is different in his/her idea of romance. I am a black woman and I have dated different ethnicities. I have found in my personal experience that most of the black men I have dated were not very romantic at all, however, they were extremely sexual persons. I have dated Latino males and while I found them to be romantic, they were possesive at times. Not all, but some. I dated Italian men and found them to be the most romantic of all, however, as a black woman who was new to interracial dating at the time, I was unable to appreciate the romance because I felt that it was not sincere. Maybe that could explain why the black men were not as romantic. LOL! As time progressed, my relationships have been wonderful across the board with any race.

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  20.   embraceme says:
    Posted: 05 Sep 06

    WELL THIS SUBJECT AS WE ALL KNOW IS MY SPECIALITY.. LOL.. MY THOUGHTS ON THE MATTER IS THIS.. A MAN IS A MAN WHETHER HE BE WHITE , BLACK, OR ANY OTHER COLOR..ROMANCE COMES IN DIFFERENT FORMS.. FOR ME ROMANCE WOULD BE .. LAYING IN THE BACKYARD UNDER THE STARS IN THE MOONLIGHTED NIGHT IN A HAMMOCK WITH MY MAN HOLDING ME TIGHT SHARING OUR WANTS AND DREAMS.. JUST TO FEEL THE BREEZE OF THE NIGHT FLOWING THROUGH MY HAIR AND THE SCENT OF MY MAN UPON MY FACE.. NOT ALL MEN WOULD UNDERSTAND THE MEANING OF THAT.. IN MY EXPERIENCE IT DEPENDS ON THE HEART OF A MAN .. SOME MEN DONT KNOW HOW TO BE ROMANTIC. ITS JUST NOT IN THEM.. BUT THOSE THAT DO THANK GOD FOR THEM CAUSE EVERY WOMAN AND LETS NOT FORGET MOST MEN LOVE TO BE ROMANTIC AND FEEL THE LOVE A MAN OR WOMAN HAS FOR THEM.. AND REMEMBER IT IS THE SIMPLE THINGS IN LIFE THAT PUT A SMILE AND A BEAT IN YOUR HEART.. WELLL THATS JUST MY IDEAL I AM SURE WE ALL HAVE DIFFERENT VIEWS ..

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  21.   whytb0y says:
    Posted: 05 Sep 06

    ROMANCE IS NOT DEAD ,SOME PEOPLE JUST DO NOT HAVE THE DRIVE TO BE ROMANTIC, OR SOME FOLKS TAKE WHO THEY HAVE 4 GRANTED .BUT THERE ARE THOSE OUT THERE WHO ARE DON JUAN REINCARNATED .BUT I THINK SOME FOLKS THINK THAT ONCE THEY SWOON THAT SPECIAL SOMEBODY THAT THEY DO NOT HAVE TO TREAT THEM SPECIAL , ROMANCE SHOULD LAST A LIFE TIME IN MY OPINION .CUZ JUST LIKE THEY CAME INTO YOUR LIFE AND LIT UP YOUR EYES THEY CAN WALK OUT YOUR LIFE AND PUT OUT THE FIRE .IF SOMEBODY DONT FEEL WANTED WHY SHOULD THEY STAY .BEING ROMANTIC SHOWS THAT PERSON YOU CARE ABOUT THEM AND WANT THEM AND THAT THEY ARE SPECIAL ENOUGH TO MAKE YOU WANT TO GO OUT OF YOUR WAY TO MAKE THEM HAPPY EVERY DAY.

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  22.   Coco says:
    Posted: 04 Sep 06

    I think romance is so important but most have lost that art. We tend to get comfortable when we have been together for a while. My favorite way to spice things up is with my wig collection. My guy never knows which girl is going to show up and there is a different personality for each wig!

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  23.   jckappa says:
    Posted: 04 Sep 06

    @NCNIKKI --- If you like it then I love it but one would think after awhile those baths would get routine. I say go for a shower next time. ;)

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  24.   urmydestiny says:
    Posted: 04 Sep 06

    Romance comes in all different styles, just like each man is different so will be his idea of romance. When you're sure the one you have is definitely the one you want romance follows automatically. I really don't believe it's a race issue.

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  25.   Natural72 says:
    Posted: 04 Sep 06

    I do believe that we are all romantic. However, I do believe that the chemistry has to be present to have true romance.

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  26.   Marquez097 says:
    Posted: 04 Sep 06

    I think the idea of having a month dedicated to romance kinda kills the romance. Romance should be dedicated on a daily basis...not on a special month.

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  27.   Sweetheart says:
    Posted: 03 Sep 06

    Romance is out there. I have found it once or twice but when it left. I felt as though I was a different person. I guess I thought it would always be there, but I was wrong.

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  28.   kavock says:
    Posted: 03 Sep 06

    Relationship is sweet and good,I like friends and i do cherish good time wuth them.so if i can be connected very first i can be happy.

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  29.   Kitty3 says:
    Posted: 03 Sep 06

    First of all, I am a new member and I am impressed with this website already. Leticia you are hilarious. I loved listening to your animated telling of romance. I can't wait to be romanced. I am a reformed workaholic who just woke up to the fact that my life is passing me by and while I live a very comfortable life, it is a life alone. So I am looking forward to celebrating romance at every opportunity--trust me, race will not be an issue for this starved woman.

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  30.   Ann says:
    Posted: 03 Sep 06

    Maurice is the most romantic man I've dated. He was always so attentive, thoughtful, a gift giver, and caring. By the way, he is black.

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  31.   NCNikki says:
    Posted: 03 Sep 06

    This is for JC Romance for me is...a lot of little things and an occasional "big" thing. I love it when I come home and my man has made a bubble bath for me...with candles, (music & wine optional). After he lets me just enjoy the "moment". Then he comes in and washes my body. Some times he joins me, most times he doesn't. He does this at least 4-5 times a week for me. It's a little thing that makes my night. And when he touches me...I still get goose pimples...Gotta go, he's in the tub now...think I'll suprise him!

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  32.   Tony says:
    Posted: 02 Sep 06

    I think some of the expectations and frames of reference mentioned in the article are based on stereotypes. It all boils down to the individual. A romantic when he wants to be Black Man. :)

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  33.   Majestic says:
    Posted: 02 Sep 06

    I dont think romance is dead at all. and YES.. there is a huge difference when it comes to Black men vs. White & Hispanic men. i have always been treated better by white men when it comes to relationships and yes i dated a few nationalities. spanish men are passionate and possessive. black men are controlling and sexual and white men are different. i enjoyed my last relationship - with a caucasian male - because he took the time to show me around, great restaurants and always good conversation. we just did not communicate well and it came to an abrupt end but he was a bit romantic...

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  34.   xina03 says:
    Posted: 01 Sep 06

    I think when it comes to romance(love) there's no difference betweenblack and white. When u love some1 you become color blind....all you care about is you and him/ her

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  35.   Carla says:
    Posted: 01 Sep 06

    Romance comes in the beginning but if we arent careful.....as the relationship develops it will fade....its important to keep romance alive in a relationship but YES it can still exist

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  36.   jenn says:
    Posted: 01 Sep 06

    IN MY EXPERIENCE.... I'VE EXPERIENCED MORE ROMANCE IN MY CURRENT RELATIONSHIP, NOT BECAUSE HE'S WHTE...BUT BECAUSE HE'S THOUGHTFUL, SWEET, AND SENSITIVE TO MY EVERY NEED...

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  37.   gino says:
    Posted: 01 Sep 06

    Romance is great when you read romance novels..real life it does not exist

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  38.   UNME23 says:
    Posted: 31 Aug 06

    IT ALL COMES DOWN TO THE PERSON AND HOW THIER HEART IS, ITS NOT THE COLOR.

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  39.   WHYTB0Y says:
    Posted: 31 Aug 06

    ROMANCE AND RACE ARE TWO DIFFERENT WORDS . AS PEOPLE ARE DIFFERENT. YOU SAY NOT ALL BLACK MEN ARE ROMANTIC, BUT I KNOW SOME WHITE GUYS THAT WOULD LEAVE A WOMAN BROKE, BUSTED AND DISGUSTED AND AFTERWARDS THEY WOULD MOVE ON. STEREO TYPING IS ALL THAT COMMENT IS. ITS LIKE SAYING EVERY BLACK PERSON LOVES CHICKEN , SHEWT MY EX WAS BLACK AND SHE HATED CHICKEN. POINT IS NOT EVERYBODY OF A CERTIAN RACE FITS INTO A CERTIAN STEREO TYPE, WE ARE ALL INDIVIDUALS. SOME HAVE A TENDER SIDE OTHERS DON'T. AS SWEETEST SAID, I'M NOT GOING TO BE ROMANTIC IF THE WOMAN I'M WITH DOES NOT APPRECIATE IT AND I'M WHITE ITALIAN.

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  40.   kandi says:
    Posted: 31 Aug 06

    Romance is great when you read romance novels..real life it does not exist

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  41.   jckappa says:
    Posted: 30 Aug 06

    So what defines romance for some of the ladies of AR?

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  42.   sweetest1 says:
    Posted: 30 Aug 06

    I have to disagree with the 'black men aren't very romantic' statement. I met a wonderful man on site and everyday he sends romantic cards, messages, and says the sweetest things when we talk on the phone everyday. He isn't the only romantic black man I have met either... it just depends on the person and who they are involved with... after all who wants to be romantic if the other party doesn't appreciate it??

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  43.   Ann says:
    Posted: 29 Aug 06

    This is such an interesting article. Yes, romance still exists, in the person of Maurice D from Louisiana. I think he should give classes on the subject!!!

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  44.   Jimmirix says:
    Posted: 29 Aug 06

    I am a diehard romantic. I know romance is not dead. We were not made to be robots. The human being is wonderfully made and one of the wonders of the human being as opposed to lesser creatures is that we don't just mate, we romance as well... at least that's how we were made to function

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  45.   yoby says:
    Posted: 28 Aug 06

    romance is something connected to the personality and the ideas of stereotypes, but i think living with them is better then living without them!

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  46.   maria says:
    Posted: 28 Aug 06

    Romance isn't dead at all. and some of us are meeting very romantic people here so keep up the good work

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  47.   camille says:
    Posted: 28 Aug 06

    Romance has no color nor ethnicity. Its the defination of it that fail most of us. I may define it differently from the person that doesn't imply its not there. Guy, romance is real and very livid and those tiny ignored things spells ROMANCE!!!

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  48.   Johanna says:
    Posted: 28 Aug 06

    Well I dont think romance is dead. When you find that special someone romance and intimacy will just come naturally. Those are things that dont have to be forced when 2 people are made for each other. Romance and passion is always better than meaningless sex and lust.

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  49.   jckappa says:
    Posted: 27 Aug 06

    Romance has nothing to do with ethnicity. Its about the person. Yay for the promotion of stereotypes!

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  50.   misotall says:
    Posted: 27 Aug 06

    I think we all have romance in us to some degree. It's just a question of hitting the right 'keys' that bring it out. Some people you meet just naturally get that from you.

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