Does her earning more affect your sex life?

Posted by James, 06 Dec 09

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Most men grapple with figuring out where their place is when their women bring home much of the bacon… including in the bedroom.

When some men find themselves with women who make more money than they do, much as they would love to make more, naturally, they are fine with the situation as it is. Some even admit that this somehow affects their sex lives… it makes it better. It’s like trying to provide sexual satisfaction to their women as a way of giving back.

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Derrick Hayes, whose wife makes twice the money he makes, says in such a relationship, the man has to handle his business – sex that is. “You’ve got to be creative. You’ve got to be good!" He wants to shine in this one special area. Much as her earning more doesn’t make her any more or less desirable to him, he just feels an internal pressure on himself.

Two social scientists that were at Cornell University stated in a study dubbed 'Power and Dependence in Intimate Exchange' that “individuals offer greater sexual gratification to partners” based on several qualities their partners posses … and a higher income is one of those qualities.

For some men however, having a woman who earns more makes them feel like somehow they have failed their families and spouses and this affects their sex lives negatively. Most men in the lower-income bracket have higher rates of erectile dysfunction compared to those in the upper-income brackets. Stress, lower self image and the feeling of powerlessness plays a big role in this.

But some look at it differently. What matters most is the preservation of the male pride to the women they love. Men need the women in their lives to remind them how manly, desirable and competent they still are. And when this is the case, they find themselves able to embrace the evolving gender roles.

Ladies, even if you have a stay home daddy for a husband, find the one thing that makes him feel that he is still the man. It doesn’t have to be overtly sexual. It can be something as small as getting him beer from the fridge or serving him the dinner he may have prepared. Try finding the one classic traditional feminine thing that will preserve your man’s masculinity.

Does her fat paycheck affect your sex life? How? If negatively what do you think can be done to smooth things out?

1 responses to "Does her earning more affect your sex life?"

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  1.   ACEBENICE says:
    Posted: 07 Dec 09

    SEX, MONEY AND POWER has always been the American way of life for men, especially white men. Society has placed a value system on human lives based on how much money you make, skill set, blah, blah, blah. Money never made a man or a woman. Men and women make men and women. So the argument is valid, but weak when you look at the whole picture. What does money do. Money is only a means to an end...go figure..... Now the comment about sex, both positive and negative has much to do with the how the individual see themselves as a person. If a man thinks that his money makes him a real man, then he is misinformed as to what makes a man a man. The Mocha era is over, but from generation to generation, it is still taught to our sons and then our daughters are taught that a man is suppose to take care of you financially. What about the emotional needs of a woman. Money does not provide for those needs. Money keeps a roof over your head and food on the table. That does not interpret emotional fullfillment at all. Our parents provided shelter....go figure again....LOL!!! I think that if, like in one instance, the man works the bedroom, it is because if his wife is a professional women working alone side professional men, he, the husband, need to make sure that there is nothing those professional male colleagues can give his wife that he can't give her. And of course, he is a secure man as well. For the man who have the problem feeling that he is a failure, be careful because that only turns into resentment, break down of communications and then the affairs. And yes women who make more money need to not emasculate their men either. Leave work at work and communicate your love well to him. Money did not matter when you met, why would it matter now.

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