Dating Mr. White

Posted by James, 11 Sep 07

dating Mr WhiteHas our attitude about dating outside our races changed? Some writer in Detroit decided to try something different… something new: dating a White man. The attraction was there – good-looking guy with a sense of humor. One thing that was a plus for him was that he was liberal and smart. Being 39, the dude seemed like a viable option. "The older you get, the more open you become to the possibility of love… I would like love to come in a certain form or color. But at the same time I realize that the population of eligible Black men is getting smarter. So I'm open᾿ says the writer.

According to some polls, 45% of black women have been involved in interracial relationships. And as for those who haven’t, it’s not because they lack the opportunities… 70% have been asked out by a white guy. A lady who had watched the movie “Something New᾿ (in which the character falls for a White guy) says that movie was her signal to start chasing and accepting their offers. And she puts it this way: She is now looking for an Ideal White Man instead of an Ideal Black Man.

Most people aren't fazed at all when they see a Black woman with a White man… Now go ahead and flip the script… Fifty-three percent disapproved of seeing a Black man with a White woman.

Your perfect partner could be online right now...

What are you looking for?

Successful black men who choose to "cross over" may draw additional ire because of the perceived notion among black women that Black men who have made it tend to prefer non-Black companions. I think Celebrity couples also play a role in influencing black women’s feelings. Yeah, we're cool with Halle switching from marrying Black men to dating Gabriel Aubry, a White model. But Kobe, Tiger, Terrence and Taye? Hmmm.

So do black women have double standards when it comes to dating outside the race? Leah who is 36 says while she was strolling with her date who is white, she got some chilling reactions. She got chants from black men: "Sellout! You think you White?"

I don’t know if it was the neighborhood that sees a Black Women and White Men dating as a NO-NO or is it that black men too have their double standards? You tell me.

70 responses to "Dating Mr. White"

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  1.   midnite says:
    Posted: 31 Jul 10

    Just what does the term sellout mean anyway? Sounds like something they said in the 60's. Ridiculouus.

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  2. Posted: 03 Jul 10

    It amazes me as well, eshowoman......hypocritcal mess, it is. Peace

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  3.   eshowoman says:
    Posted: 30 Jun 10

    It is amazing that a post about black women out-dating. still attracts black men who put down black women. You point to a almost 20 year old movie when black men have been calling us b*thes and whores in rap music and constantly dress up like black women and act out the most egregious stereotypes for decades? Black men are outmarry at a rate 2 1/2 times the rate of black women. Please go find the non-black women of your dreams and keep you hatred of black women to yourself!

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  4.   fkoi says:
    Posted: 05 Jun 10

    If I'm truly looking for love it would be ridiculous to limit myself by eliminating 13% of the population based on melanin.

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  5.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    One of the things that I got out of watching something new was that it shows how so many of us women want a man to validate us. I feel like this, I could be missing out on a man who really loves me by limiting myself to men that fit in a round hole or a circle whole. I may be a circle but the man who will love and adore me may be a triangle. In other words, he may be exactly the opposite of what I expect. Now I am not saying that we should not have standards, that would be stupid. But, I feel that we should not look for validating attributes. For instance, my man is the CEO of some important company and he makes six figures. I want to be the damn CEO and make six figures. If he is a gardener,and he loves me that could be a good thing. What good would it do me to be married and validated by a man who has a fancy position and sleeps around and embarrasses me infront of his friends. Like the move Diary of a Mad blackwoman. The main charactrs successful husband did just those things. Then when the right man did come along she couldn't accept it. She even stayed in a bad relationship far too long because of the validation she felt it had. But she did not have her husbands heart because he had standards too. She just sat at home all day figuring out how to spend the idiots hard earned money. See there are two sides to every story. Does that justift the meanness of what he did. No. My thoughts on the matter.

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  6.   Hannes72 says:
    Posted: 05 May 10

    @mayp But you should choose by the look, the way he is, things you have in common or whatever but not by financial matters. I only know things like that by the nigerian golddiggers we have in Austria, not a nice thing.

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  7.   mayp says:
    Posted: 02 May 10

    i need a good looking white man, who is financialy ok, also very romantic .

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  8.   mumu says:
    Posted: 25 Mar 10

    i love white boys! i only date white boys....and you know why..its because i am attracted to them, the few times am attracted to a black boy, he only wants white girls..so i guess we even out..

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  9.   triccinicci says:
    Posted: 04 Oct 09

    I forgot to put the actual numbers to contact for Comments and Concerns regarding ethics in this blogs postings. Issues can be Reported to Chellaul Corp: Call: 1-866-484-0626 Between 1pm and 6pm Monday - Friday Intn'l: (+1) 866-484-0626 1pm and 6pm Monday - Friday

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  10.   Laurelton says:
    Posted: 04 Oct 09

    Dear Ich Single and but unattached means sleeping with a man but "waiting for something better to come along". Again, my problem with her story is she met the man twice. Then it jumps to him "giving her everything" just to have her as his mistress. Then she stresses she "knew" he wasn't leaving his white wife. You know all this information after two meetings. This guy most be the boldest white man in America. "OR" there was some "fooling" around going on. I just don't see a wealthy guy being that disrespectful unless "you were down" with the arrangement. If you are supposedly so "sophisticated" how did "the mistress talk" come about? Just another "one sided story" with holes in it.

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  11.   triccinicci says:
    Posted: 04 Oct 09

    For Comments and Complaints: Address c/o Chellaul Corporation 1135 Terminal Way Suite 209 Reno, NV, 89502 USA Email Contact by email Toll-free Phone Contact by phone Fax +1 775 996 7271

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  12.   Azrazyel says:
    Posted: 04 Oct 09

    So she being a concubine: Does that mean she's a gold-digger? Or she is seeking a higher social status? Or he is just using her as a sex slave? Or she possibly wants children without marriage. Pretty crude if you ask me. I will refer to Mr. Laurelton Queens term sellout here: It seems plainly written in bold inscription across her forehead. She deems herself as a 'higher' order now that she associates with a white man. She is looking back at the black men in here from the top (of the social ladder), and staring coherently with blatant pride of which shows her weakness. I would be disgruntled too...

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  13.   Ichibod says:
    Posted: 04 Oct 09

    By the way, what does single but unattached mean?

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  14.   Laurelton says:
    Posted: 04 Oct 09

    Dear Ich Tricc story was going well until I noticed something. That is why she snitched so fast to the blog owners. Look at her statement concerning the wealthy white men she allegedly said "she never got involved with". "Some years ago a very wealthy realtor in my home town invited me to speak with him over a late lunch as he had shown me a house I truly wanted that was way out of my ballpark, but I felt the house was overpriced (it was). We met and he broke two things down for me. The first was the house could be negotiated. The second was that he was insatiably attracted to me (We had met only on two prior occassions, one being the initial contact to show and the other a reshowing for an offer). Being that he was a realtor certain personal information had been revealed to him during our business interactions so he knew I was single, unmarried. I was in my late 20s to early 30s at the time and single but not unattached. This realtor told me in no uncertain terms that he wanted to provide for me and help me pursue the dream of owning that home. He was not only dead serious but also offered to give me the home, the car, anything I could dream..BUT he wanted a commited, monogomous relationship with me. The kicker was he was married and told me he would NEVER divorce his (white) wife. He made that certain. I was to be second class and bought. I couldnt deal with the thought of my humanity being wasted by some shiny, spinning thing that looked and acted like fools gold. Especially something I could surely afford myself, just not his home. Some people I tell this story to say I should have taken the bait. Id be wealthy by now no doubt (you know the use em and lose em deal)." Essentially, the white man allegedly said he wasn't going to leave his white wife for her. Now why would a man say that and he only met you twice? Allegedly, you never got involved with this wealthy white man right. How does that conversation get to the point that his wife is even mentioned concerning "leaving" her for you? I have gone out with women but rarely do we get to the point of me supposedly leaving anyone for her. That would take months hypothetically speaking. Basically what your saying this wealthy white men fell "head over heels" for you in the first meeting. See this is the problem and just a warning to white guys that date intellectual black women. Half of what sellout black women say is not "totally true". They will always "spin it" to make themselves look better than they are. Her reaction is what made me post again. She ran and called the "blog police". I didn't even say she was lying. I just think there is some serious "holes" in this story. Look at the key part of the sentence she says. " He wants a serious monogamous relationship with me". UH wealthy white man spanking her ass and she put it on him. But couldn't get him to leave his white wife. She might have felt "dirty" after awhile. Then she cleans it up at the end. Of course just my personal opinion.

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  15.   Laurelton says:
    Posted: 04 Oct 09

    Dear Tricc Nobody does hate speech here. If you don't tell your personal business you wouldn't be open to criticism. That is not hate. That is an interpretation of your story and someone questioning it. Ich said your white man wanted you as a concubine. Now you are throwing a tantrum and running to the owners of the blog lol. Freedom of speech includes leaving a public blog if you don't like what is said. Give me a break lol.

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  16.   Laurelton says:
    Posted: 04 Oct 09

    Ich That was real deep. I learn something new everyday. The whole scene with Angel Basset smacking the white mistress in his JOB MEETING. That was real crass and low class. He told Angel Basset that he didn't want to be with her. Her ego just couldn't accept it.

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  17.   triccinicci says:
    Posted: 03 Oct 09

    Here is the contact information for anyone wanting to take the time and effort to make this a safe site to place their comments and views on. Personal attacks, name calling, incitation to hatred, race baiting, etc. Since there is or I have not been made aware of where the web admin contact info is thought it best to help myself and others by posting the information here: Address c/o Chellaul Corporation 1135 Terminal Way Suite 209 Reno, NV, 89502 USA Email Contact by email Toll-free Phone Contact by phone Fax +1 775 996 7271 It says they are available 1pm til 9pm M-F As well, believe me when I say you do not have to put up with such attacks. I hope this blog is not so foolish as to think it ok that a person can continue a romp of discord against members just answering blog questions. Here is proof below. "Various institutions in the United States and Europe began developing codes to limit or punish hate speech in the 1990s, on the grounds that such speech amounts to discrimination. Thus, such codes prohibit words or phrases deemed to express, either deliberately or unknowingly, hatred or contempt towards a group of people, based on areas such as their ethnic, cultural, religious or sexual identity, or with reference to physical health or mental health. There has been an increase of prohibition of terms regarded as "hate speech" based on socio-economic class in the United States, same goes to regional slurs and comments in Europe. But for many North Americans and western Europeans, hate speech has become unacceptable (at least in public), immoral and sometimes, it is taboo to use certain words or discuss certain subjects they fear may be offensive or illegal. In some contexts it may also be offensive or illegal to challenge the rights of individuals based on any or all of the above criteria. Hate speech codes are rules intended to ensure an atmosphere free from harassment and intimidation, conducive to a learning environment...Many academics have criticised these policies, arguing they are an impediment for free and uncensored discussion on controversial topics." For the full article see: Shttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hate_speech

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  18.   Ichibod says:
    Posted: 03 Oct 09

    "BUT he wanted a commited, monogomous relationship with me. The kicker was he was married and told me he would NEVER divorce his (white) wife. He made that certain." "If white guys ever come out of the closet, they deal differently, they are with you for life. Correct me if I am wrong." Still married + a monogamous relationship with another woman. That's not monogamous. He's with his wife for life yet attempted to score a concubine. That's what he did after coming out of the closet? Um... yea. You're wrong. "AA men seem to use AA women until they attain the level of success they want and will never consider a black woman suitable for all those tea parties they must now attend. " You see? That's what happens when a bitter woman writes a book, has it adapted to a Hollywood screenplay starring some pop diva at the zenith of her career, and what do you have? Women who believe "Waiting to Exhale" is a story by which they need to base their lives or force themselves to find some way the film can be applied to them. Right, Angela Bassett not suitable for a tea party. O-kay?!? Black women beating up her husband's white mistress? Merely shock value and a downright incitation to discord amongst women of different races over a man. Isn't that something? Men make movies about explosions, talking robots, sports, comedy, politics, and naked chicks that don't piss us off. Women write books and movies about senseless emotional conflict and liberation from something that was never really oppressing. They need hugs. So many of them put their Barbie dolls, jumps ropes, and Easy Bake Ovens away too soon.

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  19.   Laurelton says:
    Posted: 03 Oct 09

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

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  20.   triccinicci says:
    Posted: 03 Oct 09

    I've had Caucasian lawyers, doctors, business owners, entreprenuers, singles, marrieds, divorcees and the list goes on who approach me out of interest and attraction. I'll be honest, before I openly dated I would not speak to them (whites on the dating regard). In our community, often it's said white men only want to date black women out of lust. I've seen where that is true. I've also seen where lots of black men do the exact same thing with narry a sentiment to hold the woman in true value. Some years ago a very wealthy realtor in my home town invited me to speak with him over a late lunch as he had shown me a house I truly wanted that was way out of my ballpark, but I felt the house was overpriced (it was). We met and he broke two things down for me. The first was the house could be negotiated. The second was that he was insatiably attracted to me (We had met only on two prior occassions, one being the initial contact to show and the other a reshowing for an offer). Being that he was a realtor certain personal information had been revealed to him during our business interactions so he knew I was single, unmarried. I was in my late 20's to early 30's at the time and single but not unattached. This realtor told me in no uncertain terms that he wanted to provide for me and help me pursue the dream of owning that home. He was not only dead serious but also offered to give me the home, the car, anything I could dream..BUT he wanted a commited, monogomous relationship with me. The kicker was he was married and told me he would NEVER divorce his (white) wife. He made that certain. I was to be second class and "bought". I couldn't deal with the thought of my humanity being wasted by some shiny, spinning thing that looked and acted like fool's gold. Especially something I could surely afford myself, just not his home. Some people I tell this story to say I should have taken the bait. I'd be wealthy by now no doubt (you know the use em and lose em deal). So I wonder what the author is viewing. Should black women take a white man at any price? Often that is what we are seeing white women doing. Not every "interracial" relationship is about harmony. Many times it's just about that - race. It sounds like, acts, walks and talks like denegrating "all-you-are-is" kinda talk. I am happy to say most Women of Color see this, have learned from it and avoid such obvious interactions. I think wanting to be appreciated as women first, ensuring we have the true respect of the man we are with is very important to a Woman of Color. Me personally, I wouldn't commit to a Black man who was married (not even a famous African American ball player who once asked me as, yes, he too was married), what makes it preferential I become some white guys sex toy? In my estimation that does not make the lack of my self respect and personal dignity any less worthier in my own eyes. The thought these many years later is still nauseatingly unappealing. On the double standard bit. Honestly most AA women will date within the community until she is held back in almost all she does or is not encouraged as much as she needs. My take only. AA men seem to "use" AA women until they attain the level of success they want and will never consider a black woman 'suitable' for all those tea parties they must now attend. That is unless their celebrity and its trappings fail them. It's only been my personal accounting to see them then RUN back to their homeland and seek the comforting bosom of the black woman. Only problem he has nothing to offer her except stories about how his white wife was really all those years what he truly did not want. This is too often the story of AA men in the downward earnings of their later years of income. I am hard hearted and will not date a black guy with this type of story, no matter how loving he is when he's broke. If white guys ever come out of the closet, they deal differently, they are with you for life. Correct me if I am wrong. That's why I'm glad to see a blog like this. So we can all discuss the issues. Get them in the open and out of the closet. Still, I think I am never going to go for someone who purely sexualizes me. Can they see the person beneath the allure and attraction? Lastly, my preference for men is not just established on the basis of Mr. White (white, black c'est le vie). It is established on the sole basis of Mr. RIGHT. It's not completely a co-inkid-ink that Mr. Right is White, but I think it is due to the demographics of whose available and really more of, who is willing to live, do, see and be in the reality of life. It's my right to choose and I do.

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  21.   raven6660 says:
    Posted: 27 Sep 09

    I dont know about most people but I am from the south.My ancestors was more thna likely on the next row over from a black slave.I have never seen the difference.I trusted a black male in combat as I did a white.A lot of times more.

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  22.   SEWilde says:
    Posted: 11 Sep 09

    drs41 of 7-11-09 This reply could be futile, as I doubt you're still out there months later, but if you are, I think I might have some information for you regarding your film. SE

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  23.   ChannieBear says:
    Posted: 16 Aug 09

    So much is lost when we solely equate happiness with the color of skin. I cannot speak for others, but when I started dating outside of my race, a whole other world that I didn't really know about opened up to me. Does this mean I had to let go of the world that I had known for so long. No,I find black men as attractive as I find White men or Asian or Latin for that matter. What is important to me is as a man, are you able to communicate effectively with me, are you at least at my level so that we are moving in tandem, and my goals, successes don't overwhelm or intimidate you. I have to be attracted to you. This is what guides me. I grew up in a family with strong African American roots and foundation, but one thing my grandmother told me was never to limit my options for relationships solely because our skin color is not the same, and she pointed to the other ethnicities that have integrated into our family throughout the generations, each bringing with them a piece of culture that enrich our own, and I love it.

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  24.   renee24 says:
    Posted: 04 Aug 09

    yes drs41 open dialog is the key to a greater and free society but also is racists detox tea (some people who have been blogging through out this site need to drink that) if people can't get past color and gender then how are we to get any where?

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  25.   julius26 says:
    Posted: 16 Jul 09

    Would sunshine and caribprinces watched the movier and like it if it was a black man chasing a white woman

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  26.   Azrazyel says:
    Posted: 12 Jul 09

    drs41: I would love to give you insight, but unfortunately I haven't experienced it yet....lol I'm sure you will find people though who will be more than happy to help you out. Good luck.

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  27.   Ichibod says:
    Posted: 12 Jul 09

    I would definitely be interested,

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  28.   drs41 says:
    Posted: 12 Jul 09

    This entire thread has been very fascinating. I am a writer and an independent filmmaker currently researching for a script on an interracial relationship. And many of the points in this discussion have already provided some valuable insight. So thank you to everyone who has provided an opinion. I have several questions I have been asking black women about dating white men throughout my research. If anyone involved in this blog discussion would be interested in helping me further by giving their honest answers and opinions to these questions, it would be very much appreciated. And, again, thank you to everyone who has been involved in this intelligent discourse. Open dialogue is the key to a greater and free society. All the best.

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  29.   thekid47 says:
    Posted: 14 Jun 09

    @Girasol and Eddix, both are spot on.. The problems with these subjects is that it is a search for an ideal __man, instead of a person that is ideal for you, irrespective of what their ethnicity is.. Phenotype is an interesting approach, however I just say look for someone who meets what you are looking for in a partner, and you match what they are looking for in a partner-that is the real issue-not what the person's epidermis looks like.

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  30.   Girasol says:
    Posted: 13 Jun 09

    I am a white woman, my boyfriend is black. I didn't set out to look for a black man. To be honest, I was never particularly attracted to black men - it wasn't a racist thing, just a personal preference. I was never attracted to ginger-haired men either, for example (no offence to either of the aforementioned groups). But when I first met my man, we just got on so well, and he was really cute. I fell in love with him. I don't really think of him as "a black man", just a man with dark brown skin. Likewise, to him I am just "me" - who happens to be white. I guess its the case with many "interracial couples" - just two ordinary people who fall in love. When you're with the person, you don't even think of race its only when others make it an issue that it becomes one. Also, where does one draw the "color" line. I mean, you can find a wider variation in skin tone between a White with translucent skin and blonde hair (Scandinavian type, for example) and a White with olive skin and black hair (Mediterranean type for example) than between, say, an olive-skinned White and a light-skinned Black or Mixed Race person. Yet the latter couple would be considered an interracial pairing, the former would not. Lastly, I'm not too fond of terms like mixed race and interracial, although I grant that they are necessary to discuss these issues, there being no alternatives. But these terms make me feel that couples like us are somehow crossing a forbidden boundary, or mixing up something that should be kept separate, which is nonsense of course. People are just people, wherever they fall in the skin tone/hair texture/nose width spectrum. Perhaps the term phenotype would be more appropriate then we could talk about a dual-phenotype or pheno-diverse couple.

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  31.   Girasol says:
    Posted: 13 Jun 09

    I am a white woman, my boyfriend is black. I didn't set out to look for a black man. To be honest, I was never particularly attracted to black men - it wasn't a racist thing, just a personal preference. I was never attracted to ginger-haired men either, for example (no offence to either of the aforementioned groups). But when I first met my man, we just got on so well, and he was really cute. I fell in love with him. I don't really think of him as "a black man", just a man with dark brown skin. Likewise, to him I am just "me" - who happens to be white. I guess its the case with many "interracial couples" - just two ordinary people who fall in love. When you're with the person, you don't even think of race its only when others make it an issue that it becomes one. Also, where does one draw the "color" line. I mean, you can find a wider variation in skin tone between a White with translucent skin and blonde hair (Scandinavian type, for example) and a White with olive skin and black hair (Mediterranean type for example) than between, say, an olive-skinned White and a light-skinned Black or Mixed Race person. Yet the latter couple would be considered an interracial pairing, the former would not. Lastly, I'm not too fond of terms like mixed race and interracial, although I grant that they are necessary to discuss these issues, there being no alternatives. But these terms make me feel that couples like us are somehow crossing a forbidden boundary, or mixing up something that should be kept separate, which is nonsense of course. People are just people, wherever they fall in the skin tone/hair texture/nose width spectrum. Perhaps the term phenotype would be more appropriate then we could talk about a dual-phenotype or phenol-diverse couple.

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  32.   Member says:
    Posted: 06 Jun 09

    Dear VIP I can respect that. You shouldn't bow down to anybody. You should want to be with a man that is a protector and provider. The problem with your statement is people will believe that you have no backbone by saying "bow down". That is all I was pointing out. Good day

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  33.   vipgodess says:
    Posted: 05 Jun 09

    Mr laurelton queens and prettybrowneyes, I didn't mean bowing down and serving any man! Duh! I prefer a dominant male but a loving equal relationship. A man I can look to as the head of the household and the protector. By bowing down I meant me not wanting to play the role of the man like a lot of woman do. I'm more into the old fashioned way of relationships. We bow down to each other!!!!!! Damn people were quick to get offended when I said bow down to a white man! mr laurelton queens I am far from desperate. I just know how to treat a REAL man!!!!!

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  34.   eddix says:
    Posted: 29 May 09

    I'm black, I grew up in Alaska, I went to Catholic school and have dated women who are Black, Asian Hispanic and white. Now the majority of my Friends are asian. I remember how surprised everyone was when I stared dating a Nigerian like it was some shock but frankly I date what I like. Color has never been a factor. Looks yes and definitely personality because I get bored and it doesn't matter how hot a woman is. I dated the Nigerian for 3 years and then broke up . I played the field for a year. Now I am engaged to a white European and I think this whole race thing is stupid frankly. Date who you like. Make sure they love you but other than that screw everyone else and their opinions. In the end its who you go home to at night that matters in my opinion.

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  35. Posted: 25 May 09

    I love all men, but I just absolutely adore "white men", since I was a young girl. They turn me on so much. I think that one comment was wrong that a black woman would be chosen last. I have traveled all over the world, to fifteen countries to be exact and although I favor Vanessa Williams in my appearance I have had men of all races fall at my feet and get bug eyed!. Even the Chinese men in Hong Kong couldn't keep their eyes off of me. Black women are exotic and curvy and men love it all!. I don't care if black men run off with other races, cause I know that there isn't any race of man I couldn't have. At the end of the day all men are the same. They just want a good woman, who does not ride their ass all day. To all of my chocolate sister's don't believe the hype that white men think your ugly. That's just crap. Be nice, feminine and sincere and you will attract a good non black man if that is what you seek. I do advise many sister's to lose some weight and hit the gym. Some of us are too thick!. Not only that, but lots of white boys go to the gym too! Good Luck.

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  36. Posted: 12 May 09

    I am blessed to be in a relationship with a wonderful, considerate, loving, affectionate, compassionate man...who happens to be Caucasian. After years of supressing my desire to date a man REGARDLESS of his race...I finally decided that enough was enough. Why should I rule someone out just because we don't share the same cultural background? Life is toooo short to sit at home alone waiting for my Black prince to show up. This man never fails to tell me he loves me, will call me during his lunchbreak just to hear my voice, picks up thoughtful little gifts, makes up songs and sings in his horrible offkey tone and has never made me feel unattractive or undesired. And I'm supposed to not like it or encourage it because he is white...shhhhh...I've been loving it for 2 years and will continue to enjoy it!!!!!

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  37.   clethodim says:
    Posted: 25 Apr 09

    i'm a white man and CaribPrinces is so RIGHT!! we been in the hunt for CENTURIES now! PRAISE GOD THAT I'M ABOUT TO MARRY my very own IDEAL. BLACK. QUEEN. AMEN!

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  38. Posted: 15 Apr 09

    fedupwoman what do you mean by bowing down to a whiteman? I would love to hear your response.

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  39.   alexis.raye says:
    Posted: 15 Apr 09

    LADIES, LOVE U YOU WANT TO LOVE AND BE HAPPY! LIFE IS TOO SHORT TO BE CONSUMED WITH PEOPLE NOT ACCEPTING THE DECISIONS THAT YOU MAKE FOR YOUR HAPPINESS! YOU JUST BE HAPPY AND LET THE MAD,,, EXAUST THEMSELVES WITH BEING MAD... THEY OBVIOUSLY HAVE ISSUES WITHIN THEMSELVES. HOPEFULLY, THEY TOO WILL FIND TRUE HAPPINESS AND STOP BOUNCING FROM BLOG TO BLOG TRYING TO BRING OTHER PEOPLE DOWN. MAY GOD BLESS AND KEEP EVERYONE.

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  40.   Member says:
    Posted: 13 Apr 09

    Well You can keep bowing your head. White men will choose you last. You pathetic excuse for a black woman. How a man will respect you if you bow to him. Black men and other races of men want a woman they can respect. Instead you look desperate and dumb. Nobody loves a desperate woman. Have a nice day.

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  41.   fedupwoman says:
    Posted: 12 Apr 09

    I am a 26 year old black female and I have to say that I am more attracted to white men because they seem to be more responsible financially and family wise. I admire their dominance. Oftentimes blk men want to be treated like a king and made to feel like the dominant force in the relationship but these same blk men aren't taking care of their business. They are quick to blame blk women for the attitudes they have and their lack of knowing how to treat a man but blk men have to realize that these women don't know how to act with a man because many blk males have not been there to raise their families and teach their blk boys how to be men and their blk girls how to be women and interact with a man. White men have their women in check for the most part. Their women are being taken care of by them overall compared to blk men taking care of their women and families. I will gladly bow to a white man as long as we respect and love each other. Black women let's do ourselves a great service and let these men of other races love us!

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  42. Posted: 21 Jan 09

    I don't like when i see Black men with White women,but I like seeing Black women with a White man.I'm a black woman and just lost my attraction to black men,Inow like white men cause they are really fun to me.I love their hair,how they talk,and just the way they are.But I still love my black people cause that's who I am.The U.S we see the world in black & white,we really need to stop that,because everyone is equal.And if I ever hear someone say "You'er with a white boy"in a bad way,I am so going to jail murder.I LOVE WHITE MEN!!!so get it right.

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  43.   Member says:
    Posted: 04 Jan 09

    Naturalcd... You hit the nail on the head with your commentary for me. I was definitely one of those sistas that looked with disappointment to seeing a black man with a woman of another race (especially white). I couldn't understand it. I felt they abandoned black women. "What happened to the strong black family and keeping it alive?".. were my thoughts. "It's whack you would pick her when you get successful." I admit, the latter thought was the stereotypical norm. Well... I made a vision board at the end of 06'. A vision board is when you choose visual stimulation from magazines, books and anything pictured that would help manifest those things you desire in your life; and put them in a collage of some sort. In the love section of my board, I didn't discriminate when it came to the images I chose for what I wanted love to look like. So there were plenty pictures with white couples. As long as it dipicted the bliss I wanted, I used it. Wouldn't you know that now I'm dating a white guy that looks exactly like one of the pictures I chose! At first it was fun, different and intriguing. Now, I'm scared shitless cuz he is wonderful. We get along great, he treats me like a queen and he's handsome. I thought my husband would for sure be black. Maybe he could still turn out to be but, my whole view point has changed; and my mindset has completely shifted towards interracial relationships. I can totally relate to your revelation and change of heart. This has been a spiritual growth for me and, enabled a more expansive view towards other humans and their choices. God bless you and everyone else who has commented. I can relate to plenty points of view now. I cherish the black family,love to see it thrive and present a more positive outlook on our culture (ie; The Obamas and others) but, I also say God speed to the release of racial tension surrounding love and harmony which has no color. All the best...

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  44.   Daelyn says:
    Posted: 19 Dec 08

    I'm a white male who is married to a Black woman, but up here in Vancouver Canada people are so liberal about dating other races it's become the norm to see interacial couples everywhere you go. I admit though that me and my other half do rarely see the White Male/Black Female thing going on but it does happen from time to time. Of course when the two of us walk by the two of them I actually find myself thinking ok, should I smile at them and acknowledge it or just act as if I don't see them. For some reason I find that more weird than anything else, and I have no idea why, maybe I just like to think that we are unique and special. There's been a few times when I see people notice us and look at us oddly, or point us out to someone else, or make a comment to eachother, but these are rare. The only time I felt uncomfortable was when we took a trip to Florida over two years ago and some older black couple passed us by at the Downtown Disney area and the husband said loudly at us "Oh boy". I ignored him, but considering that I was a foreign tourist I was really watching my behavior, luckily my wife wasn't paying attention or she would have said something which would have started a confrontation and I would have had to step in.

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  45.   e-dub says:
    Posted: 05 Dec 08

    Let's all remember there is no shortage of jerks, idiots and @#$%^&*'s in this world and I include myself in that count. However, let's try to judge someone by their shortcomings. I know someone who said to his black mother: that he would never date a woman who had to straighten her hair. SLAP! "And that is for this black woman and all black women before me." Personally, I thought he was stupid and disrepectful -- file this one under he had it coming. You can't help people like that and I advise don't try, run the other way. Hopefully, as we grow under we grow wiser out grow our petty ways. We tend to see life through the lens of our personal experience just remember other people may have had completely different experiences and view the world with a completely different lens. So lets try not to assume the worse and make fools of ourselves by assuming the worse of other people. Although, I admit ocassionaly, I engage in a rousing round of thinking the worst of people and unfortunately I don't limit my cyncisim to lawyers and politicans

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  46.   Member says:
    Posted: 28 Nov 08

    I commented in another post about a simlar topic...I think to some people it's a double standard. Like I mentioned before, the white guy I was with got called a "ni***r lover" by a black guy (beacuse we wre together.) I have no problem that black men want to be with white women...That means more white men for me! Wink,wink. I have no problem with interracial dating period. I just want to know why some people just can't get over the name calling. Blackbabe4- next time that happens...smile and say hello. That guy was stupid! Anyone who is in a Int RTLSHIP be it bw/wm or wm/bm and they look at you in dissapproval has a problem. They should know it does not matter. So why does a black woman with a white man differ from a white woman with a black man? If that guy that look at you that way then he must have had a serious problem.I don't understand why peple do silly things of that nature.

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  47.   blackbabe4 says:
    Posted: 14 Nov 08

    Get this! I have had a black man who was sitting with a blonde white women, look at me ugly because I was with a white guy! Go figure!

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  48. Posted: 17 Oct 08

    You know what it is? It's the double standard. I have to agree with the ladies who had to stand the lectures, the nasty looks and the "sellout" comments by Black men who saw me walking with(and sometimes I wasn't even dating)a White man, yet had no problem chasing and dating Asian and Latina women. I agree, the same Black men who had something to say to me, would be chasing the Latina woman, drooling over the Snoop/Pharell video that was shot in Rio with all the Brazillian women(not a dark skinned one among them), or the Filipino women. As a much younger woman, I admit wholeheartedly about having anger seeing Black men with nonBlack women, but having grown up, realized that I am a beautiful woman inside and out and that men come in "31 Flavors", as the old ice cream slogan used to proclaim, and I can date whomever I want to. Some Black men see the woman as the "caretakers of the race", but come on, don't expect us to sit and wait around while the wild oats are sown by the man, so we can finally settle down! To the Black men who don't want to date your mama...DON'T! Who is to say that a Asian or Latina or a Russian or Italian woman can't have the same attitude as your mom? Sure she doesn't say your name like your mom does, or have the same skintone, but last I checked, attitude has no color.

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  49. Posted: 03 Oct 08

    I see ChocPrincess is on point (once again). Go tell it on the mountain, sis....LOL the lectures and nasty comments need to stop on all fronts..... NO ONE belongs to anyone else (in that way); so why all the bytchin and moanin??? stop wasting your time in here hating and go out there and find your own "bit o sunshine" in whatever form, shape or color that may come. Maybe you don't even have to go out....look within....try it...you might be surprised. Peace and Blessings tatted2death

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  50.   1rockgodess says:
    Posted: 02 Oct 08

    He's white and I'm black...so? why are they taking pain killers over my head ache.. sux big time

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