Swirling by Christelyn Karazin

The art of attraction isn't just about colour or creed, it's about chemistry and a whole bunch of other things. Swirling author Christelyn Karazon discusses.

Video: Are You Ready to Cut Off Racist Friends and Family?

Posted by Christelyn, 07 Aug 13

Inevitably, some interracial relationships will face conflict from bigoted outsiders, but the power always remains in your hands. How much power will you give a bigot? Only you can decide.

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Christelyn Karazin is the co-author of "Swirling: How to Date, Mate and Relate, Mixing Race, Culture and Creed," and also runs the blog, Beyond Black & White.

11 responses to "Video: Are You Ready to Cut Off Racist Friends and Family?"

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  1.   Mosiah7 says:
    Posted: 14 Oct 15

    I don't believe in cutting off relatives just because their opinion about IR dating/marriage differs from mine. They can believe what they want to and it's not going to stop me from getting my swirl on.

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  2. Posted: 04 Feb 14

    Firstly, this issue ought to come to a head BEFORE you're in a relationship, if you genuinely hold anti-racist values. Well before being in my first interracial relationship, I challenged any stereotypes, racist views, and narrowmindedness. It's not about who you're with, it's about your principles and whether you stand up for them BEFORE you're in an relationship that may bring up challenging views.

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    • LoveWhiteWo says:
      Posted: 09 Feb 14

      I am bi-racial and I enjoyed your words. You are so kind and thoughtful. Love should be color blind and people should not be intimidated on who to love or not love. I am a honor student in a dual degree program at Harvard University. and Dartmouth Business School. Segregation hurts. I grew up in New York City where every white woman was a woman I couldn't have and I ignored and rejected by white women only because of my race. That is cruel and mean and I know you agree with me Magic Paradox. There are people who enjoy segregating people based on race. It is a hurtful feeling and experience. I am on this site because I want to settle down and have a family. I have always been attracted to white women. I would like to get to know you Magic Paradox. Please text me 347-898-1212. I would like to get to know you. I want someone I can love, care for and grow old with and a persons race has nothing to do with love. I hope we can text and get to know each other.

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  3.   Silverelite says:
    Posted: 13 Aug 13

    I've had to deal with this BS my entire dating life, and at the end of the day I lay in bed and say things to myself like "Make ya a deal! Um first off, I'm not going to hook up with a woman I'm not attracted to! For what? So I can just break her heart down the road not if but when I find one I am attracted to and waste both of our time. Second off, dear family you can talk as greasy as you want about who I prefer to date when I'm not around. At the end of the day, you still love me & I'm the coolest most BA person in the family. And finally, the classic reason, you don't pay my bills, and I'm not breaking your back at night, and staring all in your face in the morning time) Listen; you only live once, make some money, play hard, and be in a relationship with the person you think is the absolute most attractive, and sexy in your own opinion. Those other ppl in your life; they will figure it out! Ls

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  4.   Chill71 says:
    Posted: 12 Aug 13

    I think you need to move to Australia, we don't care if you are black White or purple. There are so many interracial marriages families just worry that the partner is treating you right.

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  5.   bluecat4u says:
    Posted: 12 Aug 13

    We are both in our mid 70 s. I am white my wonderful wife gerri is black. We been married for over year and half. Get along great only one of her sisters opposed. Two very important things are religion and politics in a marriage. They can start more fights than black and white. Oh yes we live in a all white area. My wife seems to get along fine with people and in church groups. I read these profile one liners just for fun some are so neg. Some with bad pictures and I thank you hope this helps someone.

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  6. Posted: 09 Aug 13

    I haven't had too much of a problem with that in my family being that we are all different and I have cousins who are bi-racial. My friends are great too. My dad had a slight problem with it in the past but he got over it. He said as long as the guy treats me right. He just made me aware of people in the world who will not like it.

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  7.   cutiepie43 says:
    Posted: 07 Aug 13

    My personal experiance; emotionaly it was hard to not want the approval of my family and friends. more family than friends. i soon came to realize that i dont sleep with them and im a self sufficent woman so why do i need approval from them or anyone. the bottom line for me is i dont give a @##%&#@#% what any one thinks about interracial dating i ove it and its whats right for me. so if family or friends arent on board with me being me then they get left behind in the dust.There are plenty of people in the world who are willing to accept me for me. best wishes, Deborah

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  8.   arlandf says:
    Posted: 07 Aug 13

    With the white guy with the skinhead brother, go ahead and date the black woman. He must start putting his brother in check. Like I said many times, many of these white men that have black women do not check themselves or their relatives racist behaviors and these women will write Essence and Zane about how to deal with their racist spouse or relatives. I do not give these women any sympathy. Since this man has a sincere interest in a black woman, he must learn to start cutting people off who don't agree with his decision. He must learn to live his life without people foolishness. To the white woman with the black boyfriend, I pray that her boyfriend is a intelligent brother with wealth. She will need it. I believe that if she pursue a relationship with a black man, she might get disowned by her family. Also, I hope her boyfriend's side of the family don't have relatives, black women relatives in particular that despise interracial dating. She will face arguments about white women taking black men from black women or incidents in the past that got black men killed for accusation against a white woman and she doesn't need that. Overall both parties need a support base because there are people that dislike their choices.

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