How to deal with "...ISM's"!!
"Nope not talking Sex, Social or Race, but..."
Before you start forming your nasty little comments let me say this, opinions are like booties...everybody's got one. Some we like more than others, some we don't ever want to see and others we can't get enough of...you get the idea. How do you give and take criticism says a lot about who you are, where you are and what you believe. The only question is "who's really cares?"
I'd like to think that I can take constructive criticism as well if not better than the next guy or gal. I've worked in an industry that dished it out quite regularly as a yardstick to measure talent, position and value. How I dealt with that information determined my growth in a lot of instances. With that in mind, in my younger years I listened, made adjustments and tried again. Well, experience is the best teacher and now in my older more mature mind, I still listen, determine if any adjustments are necessary based on my core ideals, thoughts and values, make adjustments if necessary and then move on.
Your perfect partner could be online right now...
What are you looking for?
See, I've always known but, it's taken me a while to learn that everything ain't for everybody! The more you know yourself, the less likely you are to be offended when criticized. It's also important to know the difference between criticizing the person verse the action of a person. Surprisingly, a lot of people don't know the difference. For that reason alone you have to take it with a grain of salt.
It's very clear to me when I read some of the comments on this site, that people are so passionate about what "they" are passionate about. Often they attack another person -personally, instead of addressing the statement or opinion. They are not the same. Good people do bad things and smart people make stupid decisions. Although many could argue that we are the sum of our actions, thoughts and values. I have yet to meet a person whose character could be defined by one crazy opinion held or contentious view expressed.
Instead of "don't ask, don't tell, my personal stance is "I don't tell unless you ask"! The reality is that most people don't really care what you think. While you're pouring out your heart and soul talking about your personal triumphs and defeats, what happened that brought you to this place in your personal awareness where you formulated your morals and core values and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. They're already thinking about how they can interject their story, their experience, what their response is going to be to questions that you haven't even thought to ask yet.
Besides, what are your real motives in offering criticism anyway? Is it to tear down or build up? Is it to make you feel better or make them feel worse? Are you stating fact or mere opinion? I already told you what I think of opinions. So, what is Leticia's answer to criticism? I like to call it "positive suggestions".
Don't tell me that you think something is ridiculous because "you" would have done it differently...do it differently. I don't write to sway your opinion only to offer mine. Keep in mind that "our" opinions come from "our own understanding" not yours.
Leticia says..."you do you and I'll do me and if by chance we find each other...its beautiful!"
- Watch: How to instantly Feel Confident About Your Body
- QOTW: Are You on the Hook in Your Relationship?
- QOTW: Black Girl Wondering If The Guy She Met Online Is Really Attracted to Her
- American Born Indian Woman: "My White Fiancee says I am not American"
- 10 Great Romantic Date Ideas If You Live In Chicago
14 responses to "How to deal with "...ISM's"!!"
Leave a reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.