The February issue of Essence Magazine: Black Men, Love & Relationships, has Reggie Bush, the NFL player who is in an interracial relationship with Kim Kardashian. The main focus for this issue is celebrating Black love. Having Reggie on the cover really aroused a flood of seething comments from readers just because he is dating a non-black woman and the magazine targets Black women.
Here one of those comments:
“Why is there a white supremacist on the cover of Essence magazine? Because any person who thinks white women are better is indeed a white supremacists. Having this man on the cover is beyond offensive to me as an African American woman. He is just another crude reminder of all the black men who perpetuate racism against black women, by rejecting them and showing the utmost disrespect by choosing to date non-black women”
So, what is so wrong with celebrating the committed and loving interracial relationship of this Black man? Assuming the issue was about Black women, love and relationships and Halle Berry was on the cover that’s celebrating Black love, would we have seen the same reaction?
Tags: interracial dating, interracial relationships, dating websites
Popularity: 16% [?]
Comment by rightguy99 on 11 January 2010:
Have these people lost their minds.. especially on an inter-racial dating site. Love is love…. maybe the magazine should be named American Essence… love is love I am soooo tired of the ignorant racists whatever their walk of life..
Edward
Comment by bdsista on 11 January 2010:
I think that if you have an issue called “Black Love” in a Black Woman’s magazine, logic would tell you that it should have something to do with Loving Black Women. There is a serious disconnect to feature a man who does not love a Black woman in a Black woman’s magazine issue on Black Love. Halle Berry is a Black woman who is LOVED by a white man, but I think the focus is supposed to be on Black women who are loved by whomever. Since Black women are so often put down as not conforming with the white beauty standard that bombards us from birth, I can understand how reader and long time readers like me (1971) would think that a Black man who chooses not to love Black women would be a poor choice for this issue. I don’t know if I would go so far as to call him a white supremacist, but if his ONLY choices are white women, then he has the same disease Tiger has. It is insulting to have someone who does not even date his own on the cover of a Black magazine. Black women want to feel desired and appreciated and loved. Bad editorial work on the part of Essence. Hope they do better next time.
Comment by RUFILICE on 11 January 2010:
Please get over it and move on. Love is love and for the record Kim Kardashian is Armenian, ie not coco brown but still a woman of color.
Comment by Azrazyel on 12 January 2010:
God, now another reason for black women to complain that black men and any other races won’t date them.
James is having a field day with this. He knows how to push the sensitive buttons of the one’s intended.
Comment by bdsista on 12 January 2010:
rightguy, the magazine is not marketed as interracial, this site is. Essence from the beginning in the 1970s was created to be a magazine for Black women, since there were NO fashion and beauty magazines for women of color back then. So don’t criticize Essence, it is what it was created to be.
No slam on Kim Kardashian but last time I checked she wasn’t donated to UNCF or protesting anything related to WOC. So ok, she’s of color, but I wouldn’t consider her Essence material, there are also politics involved, like it or not.
Comment by establishedqt on 13 January 2010:
The comment from the Essence reader is beyond disturbing to me. It shows you the deep wounds of yester year & how it breathes in this woman’s heart even today, it is sad to me. How can you have such hate for a man that is dating a different type? I prefer to date tall man, should we hate ourselves for having a preference when it comes to the opposite sex? I prefer men with darker skin then myself & I have 2 close African-American girl friends that only date Caucasian men! Should people hate them too? Surely no, just as you should not hate yourself for liking ranch dressing over italian on your salad! It is what it is! STOP THE JUDGMENT!
I read Essence even though it is not targeted for me or to me. I know not all the readers feel the way that one poor individual does. Happy MLK day & remember what he worked so damn hard for, stop perpetuating hate!
Comment by Rene06 on 14 January 2010:
I am a huge proponent of interracial dating/marriage, but even I can’t cosign the editors choice on this one. Reggie Bush was NOT the best choice, given the title of this month’s issue. It’s just not very consistant. Better it to have been a cover photo of a famous black man who is with a black woman. That would have been a more accurate description of a “Black Men, Love & Relationship” Issue. Reggie best represents the “Interracial Love & Relationship” Issue. LoL!
I agree with bdsista 100%.
Comment by ZuZu21 on 15 January 2010:
James, you are truly a mess.
Comment by bennyblanco on 17 January 2010:
Wow. First of all “one love” baby…one race one people, regardless of skin color. Have any of us ever stopped to think of the mental health level of people that openly say such things, as the person who spoke on the essence magazine in question? Have you? Seriously have you? for those who believe in one love regardless, the only thing that separates “US” from the very tiny minority of mental case that act like that, is that we choose to live our life in disregard of what “THEY” say. I personally would go crazy if I were foolish enough to think that the majority of people are racially warped like that person….because the majority of people ARE NOT. Celebrate PEOPLE, not race. Don’t make me preach up in hear…if there is a magazine celebrating ANY race, for that matter….oooh that isn’t good to begin with…better just let a magazine be a magazine, because if its about one race and not all…you going in the wrong direction. Now this person wanna label the magazine as a celebration of one race, then have the nerve to say that the man on the cover “isn’t good because he is not racist like you want him to be” ? Hello-he is not racist, and I’ll bet a big hug would solve alot of your problems.
Comment by 12cuddlewith on 17 January 2010:
Well to me he is still a black man regardless if he is dating someone of another race, he doesn’t lose his blackness, maybe it’s not what everyone wanted but obviously someone at Essence magazine wanted him on the cover or thought it was ok, and i was happy to see him in my mailbox. Secondly, people still have it wrong with the whole white woman thing because kim isn’t white, she probably doesn’t even check white on any applications so hello she isn’t white. Yes Essence is a magazine that for made for black women who can say he doesn’t love black women either, it’s not like you asked him and i don’t ever recall reading anything about him saying he only dates non black women….who he date prior to Kim? And if he doesn’t like black women (highly doubt it) then thats like saying he hates his mother, grandmother etc, and i highly doubt that. I am all for love, black love, white love, interracial love and sometimes gay love lol. Love is love!
Comment by bennyblanco on 17 January 2010:
oh I almost forgot the uptight comments by the one screen named, my dear “bdsista”. ….. you said something about same “disease” as Tiger Woods”….quit it…now you’re just talking crazy…
Wanna go on a date with me next weekend? You need a BUNCH of hugs sweetie…who made you so bitter talking bout “disease”….c’mon now, are you are kidding me?
Just STOP that….do something to release the pressure…still love ya though
Comment by Bamababe2k9 on 18 January 2010:
How about if Essence just said celebrating love instead of “Black Love” that’s why some women are pissed. If you say black love and you put the pic of a black man dating a non-black woman on the cover, then you asking for comments like that. Love should not have colorlines.
Comment by twig93 on 18 January 2010:
Well I can understand why Essence readers are upset - Reggie Bush does seem to be an exceedingly odd choice for the cover given the topic of the issue. But the reader’s comment is over-the-top ridiculous: dating a white person = being a white supremacist??? Is that the sad state of race relations in the 21st century?
I wonder if this woman voted for Barack Obama - the product of a marriage between a BM / WW - that she appears to be so bitterly opposed to.
Comment by twig93 on 18 January 2010:
Oh, and given what day it is, I can’t help but add:
“I have a dream that one day … little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls and walk together as sisters and brothers.” MLK
Someday we’ll get there.
Comment by 12cuddlewith on 18 January 2010:
disease my butt. lol
Comment by Sucess on 18 January 2010:
I’ve read Essence for many years studying black women. And it has been against interracial romance all that time. Once they did many pages about how us white men are such brutes to our black girl friends. It was all proproganda to sell magazines to keep the girls from venturing out.
Comment by 12cuddlewith on 18 January 2010:
Ok i guess for me again…is isnt this a interracial dating site…where we are here to find someone of another race….so i’m surprised at the few comments then because if your here on a interracial dating site then why are you bothered. I understand the whole wanting a man who dates black women on the cover and that it’s a magazine that was made for black women…i can’t argue that….but a black man doesn’t lose his blackness, he is still a black man…..but i feel all relationships are different, and we all go through the same things at times.
Comment by thicksasgov on 19 January 2010:
Kim Kardasian is fine as a bottle of 1846 red wine. Any man regardless of race would love to be involved with her as well as Anglie Jolie, Heather Graham, Catherine Zeta Jones, Jessica Alba, (white), Tiania Ali, Beyonce, Lela Richone (black) Lucy Lie, Chu Hua Huang (Asian) and on and on. Each one of these women have something in common with Kim Kardasian and that is all are extremely beautiful. That is why some women are bitter. Everybody can’t be beauitful.
Comment by Rene06 on 19 January 2010:
When one reads the heading of this latest edition of Essence Magazine, “Black Men, Love, And Relationships,” I would imagine that such a title just might imply “black on black” Love, And Relationships. Especially given, such a heading does sit atop a predominantly, and historically catered to black women magazine. So it is safe to say that there may very well be just cause for a slight feeling of disconnect for at least some of the readers of this edition, when the male figure on the cover is not necessarily in the kind of relationship that the title of this magazine may have implied. That is, some may look at it from the perspective of what is black love traditionally. That being, a black man’s love more than likely would have been directed towards a black woman, but not a Kardashian.
Just My .02
Comment by Ichibod on 19 January 2010:
I have a question for anyone who has actually read this issue. The focus of the issue was Black Men, Love & Relationships, but did the picture of Reggie Bush mean that the topic is related to his relationships, or the fact that this is a magazine for black women and he’s a handsome brotha with his shirt open? Maxim, King, Stuff, and Playboy magazines don’t feature scantily clad or naked guys on their covers (and for good reason, it doesn’t sell copies or entice men to read them). Nor do they feature unattractive and out-of-shape women. That’s a great point about Halle Berry being on the cover. Maybe there was a comment or two about it. Who knows?
Comment by The B Man on 19 January 2010:
Sucess
Essence has never been against you dating black girls.
Comment by The B Man on 19 January 2010:
Ichibod
Most of the poeple who read Maxim are women.
Comment by godiva61 on 19 January 2010:
@Ichibod,
Ich, I guess that you are going to make me go out and buy this magazine(lol). Good to see you again! Went on a nice, relaxing, and much needed vacation in Hawaii.
I’ll get back to you after I have read the article.
Hi Natalie, congrats on the move to Houston, I’m praying, yes praying(I couldn’t resist) that your new home will enrich your life in every way!
Hello Mr. Queens, hope you are well!!!
Scoff/Sarah, Happy New Year, still waiting on that e-mail!
love
godiva
Comment by sexycool on 19 January 2010:
who cares?why is it when a black woman kicks a black man to the curb and ditches him for another man,but has hatred toward him when he starts dating a white woman?maybe if you stop doing this,then maybe black men would start back to loving black women as women.
Comment by daddirollz4 on 19 January 2010:
I am constantly amazed at the ability of my Sisters to decide that they’re the victims of a particular slight, issuing themselves a permit to carry a chip on their shoulders, while simultaneously setting the agenda of what is; isn’t ‘acceptable’.
You can decide when to exhale, to keep it real, to push it up; when or if drama will be permitted. When it comes to Men, you set the standard as to what type of educational or intellectual level is acceptable (I wonder if this enables you to decide who to ‘conversate’ with), as well as what types of employment; economical status will be allowed to cater to you. You will not hesitate or give a second thought to giving us the condescending ‘5 second head-to-toe inspection’; dismissing any Brother that is not at least on the upper side of 6′ 3″; a ‘Denzel wannabe’, even IF you have NO IDEA of his socio-economic status. (Don’t EVEN THINK of getting it twisted—I’m no hater—ANYONE that knows me, knows that I’ve been a Denzel mark since ‘A SOLDIER’S STORY’) I know this for a fact because I’ve listened in your conversations with me, as well as around me. I’ve heard versions of this subject in a number of places, spoken by a variety Black Women, including my own blood sister.
Is there anyone else in the community like myself, male or female? I’m a SBlkM in Atlanta, Ga. I’m a Physically Challenged, Proud USMC Veteran (Enlisted). I’m an Un-Licensed, Un-Regulated, Un-Restricted; Un-Controllable Wheelchair-Pilot. Since my injury, I’ve made an unsettling observation.
When it comes to my Sisters, whether it’s casual conversation, or actually inviting them to share some personal time with me, I get this ‘funny vibe’, that ranges from obvious ‘discomfort’ to downright rudeness. Frankly, I have no problem with someone turning me down, or simply not being interested, but does anyone remember something called ‘The Golden Rule’?
I’ll be the first to admit, when I make an acquaintance with a Woman, I don’t ’spit game’—I’m a grown Man; I leave ‘the game-playin’ to youngsters. I’m attracted to; have been attractive to—WOMEN—That are mature in mind/thought, socially aware, respectful; intelligent. Not necessarily an intellectual, but with the common sense to realize that there are many different types of people in this world; none are ‘perfect 10’s.
Is the absence of being ‘abled-bodied’ another wedge that’s going to cause Black Women to overlook another quality Black Man because he’s not ‘perfect’?
I sure hope not because I have found acceptance with other women…and if you won’t accept me as I am, what do you think I’m going to do? To be sure, this is not a case of ’second best being better than none at all’, or ’sleeping with the enemy’, but acceptance based on that intangible quality that CAN’T be seen, called character. There is another unknown, inexplicable element that may bring two people together in an ‘extra-personal’ way, called chemistry or simply attraction.
(I can never seem to remember which one is visually challenged—Love or Justice? You mean BOTH?!)
Sisters tell US; THE REST OF WHOEVER IS WITHIN EARSHOT that any Black Man that has anything more than a casual relationship with ANY WOMAN THAT WILL LET HER HAIR GET WET IN THE RAIN…You prefer them over us, because they let you walk all over them; they let you get away with things that we won’t stand for…
I will readily admit that some Brothers may actually buy into that; run game. And yes, there are those that believe a ‘trophy White-girl is a status symbol. But this is the same person that will treat ANY WOMAN with disrespect.
Now, dig on this…There is A WAR GOING ON!
There’s going to be a lot more Brothers; SISTERS coming back home, in worse shape than me, so we are going to HAVE TO RE-SHAPE OUR WAY OF THINKING ABOUT A LOT OF ‘OUR’ SOCIAL ISSUES!
Comment by Ichibod on 20 January 2010:
Hey, Godiva.
I have really missed you. I take it you read our little discussion in that other topic. I got Natalie started and she couldn’t stop. We always need to keep each encourage.
daddirollz4,
WOW! Talk about leaving no stone unturned. Much respect to you, Sir.
The B Man,
I repeat, “Maxim, King, Stuff, and Playboy magazines don’t feature scantily clad or naked GUYS on their covers.” I don’t see what was so hard about that. Maxim is a men’s magazine that started to incorporate stuff that would grab more women’s attention to generate more add revenue. Pictures of guys was not among the changes made 2 years ago to that mag. The splitting of hairs got you really far there, bro.
Comment by bigeyes31 on 20 January 2010:
Hey godiva, thank you very much. I think of you often.Hawaii huh??, I totally jealous,LOL. I hope you had a wonderful time and plenty of sun and rest.
Ich and godiva
yes you got me going good,lol. Sorry, I couldn’t stop. Godiva, it’s Ichibod’s fault,LOL.okay I’m going stop now,lol.
Peace
Comment by Archaic thinking on 20 January 2010:
Reading some of the responses shocked me in that a lot of people still that archaic way of thinking. A reminder the “1 drop rule” of Master on the plantation has been out of existence for years.It is perpetuated by the powerful Blacks to for political reasons. It is in their best interest to do so for this reason- money, power. Halle Berry is NOT Black!! She is Mulatto/ Creole or whatever she chooses to call herself in this country only. Moreover, Mulatto is not a derogatory word! All that Mule and sterile is bullshit, used to scare people to identify themselves as such. In essence magazine alot of the models are of recent mixed race, ie 1st generation Mullatoes and Creoles, with European features and loose curly or straight hair. Where are the real Black women with West African features, showing their beautiful natural kinky hair, wide noses (sub-Saharan features)? Blacks in this country are descended from these people. It is very hypocritical to hear those racist rants or anti- interracial relationships coming from people of color.If non- Blacks make those comments it is wrong and hateful/bigoted, if Blacks do it is fine; such a double standard and uneducated view of life. It is the 21st century and this country is supposed to be progressing and catching up with race relations.In the Caribbean, Latin America, England we don’t have that issue. Just live and love someone regardless of colour. Just because a person of a different race dates/marries someone of a different race doesn’t mean he dislikes his own race, he/she happens to fall in love with someone of a different race/colour. Simple as that!! One more thing Kim is White(European) her phenotype and colour says it all, and not all Whites are very pale, yet they are White, hence phenotype and region of origination. Some Black women say this it seems to make justify their low self esteem and somewhat claiming her as a person of colour. Anyway, stop the bitching about relationships and Essence need to get with the times and Gods design for the human race, love regardless of race! If there was mag like Essence that focused on such issues you wouldn’t hear the end of it for awhile. Buy a mag that focus on love, love is colour blind, not black, Brown, White, etc.Myself being a Mulatto, my sisters and brothers of this world are all races.
Comment by nubianking9 on 20 January 2010:
I don’t know who put up that stupid thing about black men being white supremacist; and as for bdsista they’re both asses! is’nt kardashian middle eastern? I thought they broke up. Give it a break people! what will be will be. daddirollz4 and rufilice right on!
Comment by immeuru on 22 January 2010:
I date whom I want, which usually - not always - is black men. There are lots of things I like about brothers but I’ll save that for another discussion.
My comment to my black sisters is usually that I’ll just have one of their men, thank you very much! I guess it seems crazy enough that after awhile they just smile…that is, when there is a relationship established. I don’t care to grovel and apologize unless I have done something that merits an apology.
I try to understand different perspectives, although I don’t think a victim mentality ever gets us far in life. It doesn’t mean we never are “victims”, but we also have choices in how we are going to perceive and respond to life. I choose to focus on what does work and what does feel good and build my life from that place.
Still, I feel for black women in this regard. I am shocked when I read men’s profiles on dating sites. Rarely will a white man include black women as within his dating options. He may list every other color under the sun - oh, purple sure, bring it on - but god forbid, not black.
What is it with white men? I must say as a white female I click those guys off my screen. They almost always mention that they hate hip-hop too.
If racism didn’t have such damaging consequences it would almost be hilarious how much we make of skin COLOR. People don’t refuse to walk into a room because it is orange, not green. I just don’t get it - really! Can someone please explain it to me?
Comment by Bri on 22 January 2010:
For the people who can’t understand why the reactions are so harsh it’s because you only have a surface comprehension of the whole scenario. Black women are not opposed to Black men dating outside their race. We’re opposed to Black men viewing women of other races in a more positive light than women of their own race. A lot of Black men put non-Black women on a pedestal and tend to degrade and talk negatively of their own…despite the fact that many of them were raised by Black mothers and have Black female family members. And that’s the real issue, not who’s he dating, but why he’s dating. And yes, in a society that tries to shove Anglo-Saxon ideals down the throat of every brown and dark skinned person when you as a Black man feed into those same ideals, it may not make you a white supremacist, but it definitely does make you a sick individual mentally. Minorities have been taught for centuries to under-appreciate their ethnic features and it is a sad day in our history when Black men willingly feed into those same stereotypes. For example, a male friend of mine who was recently ejected from my life for being excessively ignorant was watching a show with me and asked a question about a woman’s hair he saw on a TV…this was a white girl with some very obvious extensions and so I simply answered his question truthfully and said, “her hair is fake”….to which he responded very adamantly, “you don’t know what you’re talking about, she’s not even Black!” It’s bullshit like that that makes it hard to accept a Black man’s attraction to a woman of another race as love and not self-hatred towards his own brown skin and Black women. This lovely individual then gave a whole anecdote on the features of whites and latinas and how they are more preferred…mind you this same man didn’t even realize that Brazilians and Latin Americans fell under the same racial umbrella as he stated he liked both, like somehow they were different racial groups. He also couldn’t tell the difference between a white woman with an orange spray tan and hair dyed black and a latina, a latina with tightly curled hair that grows in an afro versus a Black woman with natural hair…nor could he tell if a woman was latina or Native American….case and point, a lot of Black men know very little about women of other races, they don’t truly embrace the culture as one should in the context of a loving interracial relationship, they are just attracted to a certain look: a certain type of hair, and a certain skin color because that’s what society has taught them. As a Black woman with exotic features and long hair people assume I’m not Black or that if I am then certain parts of me are fake but a white woman with a tanning addiction and fake hair is 100% authentic, right? Anyone who doesn’t see a problem with those standards is looking through rose-colored glasses. Love is love, but every interracial relationship isn’t love, a lot of them are ignorance personified and in a society that tells women of color their ethnic features are less favorable, having your own men agree with them is extremely upsetting. It’s bigger than just boyfriend/girlfriend…it’s about the lessons the men in our community choose to teach their own sons and daughters. It’s something I see in my own family too often, like the father who beat my mother and didn’t contribute a dime to his own children but gave his second wife, who happens to not be Black, 2.5 kids and a white pickett fence. Ironically enough even though my half-siblings are mixed 2 out of 3 have dark skin…one of my younger sisters said she spoke Spanish and my dad thought she said she ‘was’ Spanish and this dumbass actually stopped her mid sentence….His second wife is Puerto Rican so my half sister really is half Spanish but she also happens to be dark skinned…she should still be able to claim either side of her racial makeup but society will still see her as Black and I watched in horror as she was actually challenged by her own parents because she ‘looks’ Black, mind you she didn’t even say she was Spanish…this was all the result of them not hearing correctly her original comment but nonetheless it raised eyebrows. Meanwhile our little brother who happens to be light-skinned is always compared to his latino cousins on my stepmom’s side of the family because he ‘looks so much like them’. So yes, interracial relationships do have to be taken with a grain of salt as all are not what they seem and countless Black people have some extremely warped views of racial superiority belonging to every non-Black person on the face of Planet Earth. And to the person who said Tiger’s ‘disease’ and was challenged…I have a problem with that too…why not challenge Tiger instead of the commentary about him? I partially agree with the person who referred to Tiger’s image issues and preference for white women as a ‘disease’. Here’s a man who’s making strides in a white-dominated sport but has issues being identified as a person of color. What sense does that make? God forbid his accolades be counted as one for the black and brown team. Woods is 50% Asian and 25% Black, he should be proud to carry both of those flags and represent two ethnic groups that are currently underrepresented in his field…but his mouth would probably burst into flames if he had to actually form the words, “I am part Black”..that is indicative of some serious self image issues..so maybe disease was harsh but it definitely is a problem that should not just be brushed under the rug. And if Black men do treat non-Black women better than they treat their own it’s not just interracial dating, it’s a travesty.
Comment by portia_4 on 22 January 2010:
First and foremost,i would like to say…do we ever think about the children ? Raising byracial children in today’s world seems alot easier,but it is when we get these obscene comments about race and color, is when myself as a parent realizes there is still alot of work to be done !Who has the right to say who we can love and who loves us back. I live in a great city in canada where the black women here are genuine and never have a problem with interracial dating.We are a city that has over come all this race related talk,though im sure it does exsist just not thrown in our faces.White women dating black men,black women dating white men is very common here and really no big deal ! How happy the world was the day Obama was elected as president, as a parent of byracial children and a Canadaian i felt so blessed to be alive the day he was elected to see the world change and the people come together was simply one of the greatest moments in mine and my childrens time !It is just a magizine and at the end of the day, we are still gonna love who we want to love.God has given us that choice,not man nor woman. So i say be happy live well and prosper now and forever.Again it it just a magizine that we read one bad comment about,im sure not all black women feel the same way she does.and lets teach our children to not see color but see all people the same !
Comment by 12cuddlewith on 23 January 2010:
i just finally read the issue and i seriously want to know how many folks complaining up in here read the issue! The focus wasn’t just on reggie bush it had a display of atleast 10 other men on there so whats the damn problem. Unless i missed his story i didn’t see anything in their of him glorifying his relationship with the “so called” white Kim K. I mean am i missing something….they had all the men write a short little story nothing big, so they used him big freaking deal, their were other black men, a latino…u gonna complain about that too?
Comment by V1ktor on 24 January 2010:
People who don’t date outside their race are racist, simple as that.
Black men choose white women, white men choose black women… it’s as simple as that. It works both ways.
Comment by ZION82 on 26 January 2010:
Armenians ARE white, people…Kim Kardashian is NOT a “woman of color”.
Lets get educated, guys.
Comment by KnowLove on 27 January 2010:
I wasn’t going to comment on this but after reading some of the responses… I believe that everyone is entitled to their own opinion but that does not make every opinion correct and contextual. Essence is a magazine that was founded for and has always catered to Black women. Mr. Bush is in a relationship with a non-Black woman. Whether she can be classified as a woman of color is of no consequence in this case. She is not Black. Essence is a magazine for Black women. He was NOT the best choice for the cover. Why is this so difficult to understand? Now to address the comment made by the Essence reader: “white supremacist”…huh…wha? That’s just crazy TO ME. However, if you are someone who is hurting because you date exclusively within your race and is finding it difficult to find eligible available partners, this line of thinking makes all the sense in the world TO YOU. Obviously, since I am on an interracial dating site that does not apply to me. Lastly, to address some of my non Black sisters and non Black brothers on this site, you are treading on very unfamiliar territory when you speak on things you will never really fully understand unless you walk around in Black skin in America. Experience trumps conjecture all day long. To my Black brothers who make outlandish comments about what someone else should “just get over”, if you weren’t the “flavor of the month” as you have become increasingly as of late, you wouldn’t be hollering this “just get over it”. Just had to put that out there. No love lost.
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 28 January 2010:
Kim K is Armenian.
Her body look like a black woman’s body. Therefore, she ain’t no white woman.
Bottom line.
These sellout black women are really sad and pathetic. Don’t get mad because white women are getting booty and breasts now.
I am disgusted by the jealousy and envy.
Step your damn game up. ABC news is not going to help you. CNN Sole”dud” is not going to help you convince white men to date you seriously.
Less whining and more confidence. Black women blame everyone for their problems but themselves.
Change your damn attitude. Stop overeating and calling yourself “thick”. Leave black men out of your mouth.
Good day
Comment by ZION82 on 28 January 2010:
“Her body looks like a black womans body.Therefore, she aint no white woman.” Oh-kay…thats kinda scary.This guy REALLY needs help.
See what I mean about getting educated?!
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 28 January 2010:
I will reiterate it again.
Kim K’s body looks like a black woman’s body. Therefore, she is not white.
Excerpt
“Armenia’s strategic location between two continents has subjected it to invasions by many peoples, including the Assyrians, Greeks, Romans, Byzantines, Arabs, Mongols, Persians, Ottoman Turks and Russians.”
How the fuck is she just “white”. This woman is a “mutt” look at her features. She is a minority woman. You nappy headed black women should be ashamed of yourself. Go smoke some more “Reggie Bush”.
You get educated you peon. Every race has “negroid” in them. For example, Italians are not “fully white”. Look at that chunky face midget “Snookie” from Jersey Shore with the “weird tan”. I heard she half Mexican and Italian. But anyway, learn your damn history.
Let me address the Jay “Shawn” coward V1ktor. Go sing down, down, down, the sky is falling down.
How are you racist if you choose to stay within your race? Your momma stayed in her race and your daddy. Are they racist?
I don’t see you heading to the projects to date “Shameka and her fatherless 2 or 3 kids.
Oh, but they will argue you down on a damn public board. But none of these people are nowhere near the black community where “the majority of black women” reside.
Your lucky Bill Gates ain’t invent computer screen where you can go upside somebody head.
I am tired of black women getting used by these cowards.
Comment by ZION82 on 28 January 2010:
You will “reiterate it AGAIN?!” That’s redundant…
For your information,assyrians,greeks,romans,russians,and all the other ethnic groups you listed fall under the catagory of WHITE.You are obviously VERY ignorant,and your derogatory comments about black women show that you’ve got a lot of anger and self-loathing issues as well…I hate to see black men (you ARE black, are’nt you?)make such JACKASS’S of themselves…you make us REAL black men look BAD.
Comment by Bamababe2k9 on 28 January 2010:
Mr. Queens, you are tired of black women being used by these cowards yet, you basically said we are all fat and have attitudes. That’s real respectful. Why be on this website if you not into interracial dating or marriage?
What disappoints me about men like you is you feel the need to put down your sistas to pump yourself up. I give most white men credit, I’ve never seen the majority of them put down their own women even if they do decide to date black men but a lot of our brothas feel the need to put us down and then have the nerve to say after your abusive words, that we should stay within our race while black men continue to follow their hearts. Why can’t black women follow theirs?
Just because you don’t approve of IR relationships, doesn’t mean it’s wrong and the last time I checked,nobody died and made you God so basically you just need to get over it.
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 28 January 2010:
Oh really???
“Armenia’s strategic location between two continents has subjected it to invasions by many peoples, including the Assyrians, Greeks, Romans, Byzantines, Arabs, Mongols, Persians, Ottoman Turks and Russians.”
Arabs and Mongols fall under “white”. You explain it to me since you make black men “look good”. What exactly falls “under white”? It can be a “broad definition”.
How about Caucasian. Definition
a. Anthropology Of or being a human racial classification distinguished especially by very light to brown skin pigmentation and straight to wavy or curly hair, and including peoples indigenous to Europe, northern Africa, western Asia, and India. See Usage Note at race1.
b. Of or relating to a racial group having white skin, especially one of European origin; white.
2. Of or relating to the Caucasus region or its peoples, languages, or cultures.
3. Of or relating to a group of three language families spoken in the region of the Caucasus mountains, including Chechen, Abkhaz, and the Kartvelian languages.
What derogatory comments about black women? There are some black women with kids by different fathers. Is it a big secret?
I normally don’t do this. But I invite you to my blog.
Right now, you are lashing out for some reason.
You can review my latest ” commentary” on my New Blog Album “THANK ME LATER”.
http://www.mrlaureltonqueens.blogspot.com/
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 28 January 2010:
Dear Bama
You are a lovely young lady. My ex girlfriend looked like you. I never said all black women have attitudes and are overweight. However, for some black women to have an attitude and to ‘demand” certain men to conform to their standards of “dating” is hypocritical.
You have a list on what you want in a man. But you don’t live up to those same standards. That goes for white men too. I have certainly heard black women say they would never date a broke white boy. Perhaps a white man that works in the blue collar field.
If I am wrong, please show me! Because I haven’t seen it! Nobody says educated black women should lower their standards. However, a degree ALONE will not get you Brad Pitt nor Denzel Washington. A degree ALONE will not get you a ring.
I told people from before I wasn’t going to hold back in 2010.
I never get the credit I deserve. I will tell you why that happens. If it wasn’t for black men like me, more white men would be TAKING advantage of you. We just basically “weed” out the white men that would be with you regardless of the tough scrutiny. Things get hard, white men run off. Sellout black women have said this. I do my homework on black women.
Black women can follow their hearts concerning interracial dating. But if they are going to bash black men. I got a serious problem with that.
I am different than other men. I am student of the 48 Laws of Power. I just want to cripple the sellout black girl movement, primarily their leaders. If I let them breathe , they will get up and want to fight black men again. Black women belong with black men. You think a white man JUMPS FOR JOY seeing his white sister with a black men! If he says ” I am okay with it”. He is a damn liar. I ain’t saying he is racist but he sure is not happy with it.
But when I feel the same way. It’s oh “put the guns away please”. I am just expressing my opinion about it like anybody else.
But please don’t say black men stop you from dating a white man. If white man are not interested. Get a backbone and confront them.
You have a nice day.
Comment by Anonymous on 28 January 2010:
Mr.Queens
lol, i saw your comment about Kim K being a black woman because of her body.
How shallow!! really, her booty is fake. two big breast dont have anything to do with it. Any body can have them, if you didnt know you can also get surgery for them. Kim is curvy but it doesnt make her black.
see a picture of her a couple of years back and she is just as flat as any other white girl. No one grows a booty in a year or two, trust me Kimmy had some surgery done!
lol, you should ask her if she sees herself as black and she will tell you hell no. black men are pathetic, they try to write any girl off as black to justify liking/dating her.
Skinny black girl with no breast or butt? oh your a white girl! white girl with breast and butt? oh your a black girl!!
Comment by Pastrygirls85 on 28 January 2010:
“These sellout black women are really sad and pathetic. Don’t get mad because white women are getting booty and breasts now.”…
“Change your damn attitude. Stop overeating and calling yourself “thick”. Leave black men out of your mouth”….
…”You nappy headed black women should be ashamed of yourself. Go smoke some more “Reggie Bush”…
Laurelton these are your hurtful words. Youre angry for some reason and its people like you who need to disappear. this venom that youre posting is the same poison that will eat you alive.I love and prefer white men because im ATTRACTED to them this has nothing to do with a low self esteem or self loathing. i love my beautiful chocolate skin, my thighs, my lips, my eyes, my breasts. There is No self hating here. You are dead wrong for what youve said, people are here to make connections and find love…..why are you here?
Comment by Bamababe2k9 on 29 January 2010:
I don’t believe that we belong to anyone but ourselves and God. My point being is I don’t see white men go out in public and diss their women like I see a lot of brothas do. If you keep on meeting these certain type of women you describe then maybe it’s you.
I’ve always been into white men since I was a kid so no you didn’t drive me towards white men, but a lot of black women are being driven that way because they are sick of the attitudes of some black men.
I think the problem with both men and women is they don’t find a partner that is evenly yoked for them no matter what race they are. And why should black women continue to hold themselves from dating men outside of race because some people don’t approve.
A good man period is hard to find and if you find someone who suits you, race shouldn’t matter.
Comment by LillyCalla on 29 January 2010:
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 28 January 2010:
Let me address the Jay “Shawn” coward V1ktor. Go sing down, down, down, the sky is falling down.
How are you racist if you choose to stay within your race? Your momma stayed in her race and your daddy. Are they racist?
I don’t see you heading to the projects to date “Shameka and her fatherless 2 or 3 kids.
Oh, but they will argue you down on a damn public board. But none of these people are nowhere near the black community where “the majority of black women” reside.
Your lucky Bill Gates ain’t invent computer screen where you can go upside somebody head.
I am tired of black women getting used by these cowards.”
You hit the nail on the head man.
White men are never seen going to the ghetto or black neighborhoods to seriously date black women but they are online looking for action.
White men will go the largest ghetto in the world (Russia) and they will marry any white woman they can find there!
But they claim they don’t want black women because black women are “too ghetto.” LOL
White men don’t go near real black women living in the ghetto and trying hard to survive and raise their children alone!
White men are phony! They only really want rich or famous black women only so they can use them!
Comment by fenway2k on 29 January 2010:
I continue to be amazed at the responses this topic generates.
What amazes me is the responses from people who 1) CHOOSE to take offense to another person’s choice that has nothing to do with them, and 2) Their decision to speak as if they are the authority and their personal beliefs and opinions as if they are fact and universal, objective truth.
Did anyone read the article? The subtitle alone makes the majority of these opinions moot.
If it’s titled, “Black Men, Love & Relationships”, then how can anyone state that Reggie Bush’s choice of who he loves and dates should not be included? he is Black isn’t he? Makes sense when you consider that we live in a multi-cultural, multi-racial country.
Who a person chooses to date is their choice, regardless of the rationale. It is their right and it’s really nobody’s business but theirs.
Those who have reacted strongly and have stooped to dehumanizing and disparaging Black men because of their choice have really played their hand. I apologize for the experiences you went through, but it doesn’t meant that Reggie Bush is a ‘white supremacist’ nor does it mean that Tiger Woods has a disease. Sorry to burst your bubble, but your opinion is NOT their reality.
Not to mention, if Black men choose White women, so what? I still have to get up every day and either go to work or look for it, I still have to pay my bills and eat….
In other words, I have a life and I choose to just focus on my and my choices because in the end, it’s the only thing I can control anyway.
Comment by sherrie8221 on 30 January 2010:
Wow…why is he a white supremacist because he’s in a relationship with a woman (Kim) who is NOT black? This is the dumbest thing i’ve read in a while.Yes i’m a black woman,i think the problem within the black community is acceptance.A lot of blacks are not capable or able to accept interracial relationships.My boyfriend is white and we’ve been together for a year and a half…love is color-blind and has no boundaries.Black women seem to think that if a black man is successful and marries or is dating a white woman;he’s a sell-out or he’s only dating a white woman because he can’t handle a “real” and “strong” SISTA….Please stop this madness and ignorance.Oh and stop thinking that white women are taking or stealing all the “good” black men away from them.
Comment by fatooti on 31 January 2010:
Why does it seem to me that Americans are so hung up about race/colour. The colour of ones skin only accounts for some 2% of who they are does it matter? I am Arab like my grandparents before me, but since my family migrated to the west people have always tried to brand as as ‘black’ - which is what our phenotype is and we have alway fought against this, since our language culture is Arab. My question is this what does ‘black’ mean? To me it means nothing and its insulting (my opinion). We are all more closely related than some of us care to admit.
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 31 January 2010:
Thank you Lilly
I think some people don’t want to face the tough questions concerning interracial relationships.
My cousin married Euro Trash from Germany while he was in the army. The “piggly wrinkled faced” white girl was horrible to look at it. My cousin looks similar to Reggie Bush at the time. He was a military workout “nut”.
My other cousin (not related to him), use to have a crush on him back in the day. She couldn’t understand what he saw in this woman.
Anyway, long story short, she put him in prison for 9 months just to get a green card to end up living with a fellow wrinkled face white man in the rich part of Long Island New York with HIS CHILD. The charges were eventually dropped for alleged domestic abuse. The judge was like sorry a veteran had to go through this.
The moral of the story. Never think the grass is just automatically greener on the other side.
Again my comment about Tameka and Shaniya with different kids by different fathers. I hardly see white men chasing them. They are not chasing the “Precious” black women of the world either.
Let’s cut out the nonesense immediately right now.
Fenway makes good points. I am glad you put the smack down on these hypocritical black women.
They want their hand in the white man’s “pockets” and the black man’s pens in their vagina.
It just ain’t going to work that way.
I like Sherri’s comments too.
She focuses on her relationship. Most sellout black women “like to get out of their lane” even with a white boyfriend.
Man look for that NEW blog Album.
BLOG LEGEND, YOU WILL NEVER BE ONE
Featured singles.
“My sellout bullets whistle like” FT Mrs Kitty
“I sent a sellout black girl hater postcards from PARADISE”.
” Dating Recession don’t bother me”
” Blog Street Hall of Fame”
” Sellout black girl global economy”
” Different day , Different sellout shit”
” Mama said never trust a sellout black one”
I am gone.
Comment by bamabelle2k9 on 31 January 2010:
That’s just he dumbest sh*t I’ve ever heard. Basically what you are trying to do is justify you own racial hatered. Sit down and shut the hell up. It’s men like you who make women in general want to give up on men. You not only hate on your own women but other races as well because of you own insecurities. If you had high self-esteem about yourself, you wouldn’t care who black women dated. It seems to me the issue is YOU can’t find a black woman who would put up with your behind so therefore you get on here trash talking because you are jealous that the black women you think you are entitled to are dating and marrying white men.
Truth is, if you were all that and a bag of chips, you wouldn’t be putting down your sistas Period. No woman I know black or white would put up with your crap and that’s the truth of the situation. So, while you busy on here trying to put us down for dating outside of our race, you need to take that time to look yourself in the mirror and fix yourself. We have a saying too; When you point a finger the other four point right back at you. Keep that in mind the next time your decide to open your mouth.
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 31 January 2010:
Dear Pastry
I apologize if you were offended.
You said this
“i love my beautiful chocolate skin, my thighs, my lips, my eyes, my breasts. There is No self hating here. You are dead wrong for what youve said, people are here to make connections and find love…..why are you here?”
I am here because I like your chocolate skin, thighs, lips, eyes and breasts.
I hope that answered your question.
Comment by fire321 on 31 January 2010:
@Queens
HA HA HA….you never fail to entertain us
Comment by u never know on 31 January 2010:
feel how u want on the subject but dont put others down for whom they love. Love is Love . I think you really cant understand it until it happens to you. Never been happier. Just live and let live.
Comment by Topdeck_23 on 1 February 2010:
And we wonder why there is racism in the world? Because people actually support this readers comments and ‘understand’ it.
Quote: “Because any person who thinks white women are better is indeed a white supremacists.”
Why does dating a white woman mean any race is better then another… could he actually have fallen in love with a personality and interests rather then ones colour of skin?
Colour is the only thing that separates us…we are all built the same inside, im sick of hearing black, white and all other colour issues… we are a race… ‘the human race’… people need to get over it… and just as i would not support a white woman saying ‘our men’ dating a woman of colour, i dont support a black woman saying ‘our men’ dating a white woman! There is no such thing as ‘our men’, the Lord put all men on this earth to interact with all women. Why do these people think they are larger then God to make his decisions on who should fall in love with who?
I think its great that they put someone like Reggie on the front cover. He shows that he is open to the world and all that is in it and maybe a few people could learn from that.
And if this magazine is targeted to black women, im sure there are many that believe love is love…whether that is same race, interracial or more.. so let this magazine continue to bring all together as one.
Comment by Bri on 1 February 2010:
@ Topdeck_23…I can’t believe how naive some people are. The Black community is full of Black men who degrade Black women and put others on a pedestal so unless you talk to every single Black male in an interracial relationship you cannot really say for a fact whether or not it’s love or prejudice. Have you missed the whole history of this country to date? Did everyday of your life prior to now just disappear….maybe by way of selective amnesia..or maybe you’re not a minority..but popular media and popular opinion has been teaching Blacks that they are inferior for centuries…so therefore when certain Black men date out you don’t know whether or not they’re just doing it because they feel their own women are somehow less attractive, less deserving, and less worthy. I love how you can quote what you want but conveniently skipped over the commentary from Black men that was negative about Black women..there are a few here who were so kind as to provide lists on reasons why no one, including Black men, want to date Black women…so I guess when a man like that only approaches women who aren’t Black society calls it love, right? What you’re really saying is as long as Black women are the ones being dogged in a public forum society will cease to give a damn…if White women were thrown to the wayside and expressed issues with the hypocrisy that made it that way the whole world would listen. Only about 30% of Black women are married…if we complain it’s because we’re sick of society treating us like untouchables and making excuses for Black men who validate all the negative images painted of us. There are dozens of Black men who are in interracial relationships because they exclusively date ONLY non-Black women…how are they not the ones who are making things about race? Many Black men pick their partners based on color alone and nothing else..every interracial relationship with a Black man isn’t someone who just fell into love and it happened to be with someone of another race…some intentionally planned for it to be that way, open your eyes
Comment by bigeyes31 on 2 February 2010:
@fatooti
I’m sure you are ONLY offended by being called or identified as black,but the question is: Do you get as upset if you are mistaken for white or do you just let them “slide” with that??? Another thing “who” identifies you as black, whites, blacks, hispanics? Who? ( this is not a rhetorical question either)In white america’s eyes you are everything and anything but white. The end.
Comment by Topdeck_23 on 2 February 2010:
Bri, I apologise you have taken offense to my comments and opinion. I definitely have not forgotten history, and i cant pretend I know how it feels to walk in a black woman or black man shoes and what they go through each day as I have only ever had glimpses into that from the abuse ive received by both black and whites for dating a man of colour. What I can say is that i dont want to see the history you talk of continue its path of destruction and devistation, and unless we all come together and stop the separation in races… this will never get any better.
I dont recall mentioning I know the thoughts of every black man, however I do put forward the argument that ‘could he actually have fallen for personality, etc…something other then skin colour. As black men may put down and degrade some black women, white men can also do the same to white women. Abuse verbal and physical happens to black women… and yet again also to white woman. Why one case is more important than another? Although I understand the argument of minorities and majorities in races, but on a case to case basis it isnt acceptible for any man to do this to any female, no matter what race.
I am here only to put my opinion across, and my opinion is love one another, black, white, male, female, whatever it be. I respect your views may be different to mine.
Comment by bamabelle2k9 on 2 February 2010:
@Topdeck_23 I think what Bri is saying is that black women are put down more for the choices we make then white women. I haven’t seen a single white guy on this topic put down Kim Kardashian because she is with Reggie Bush. And quite frankly you probably won’t. That what’s disappointing about our people; we can’t even stick up for one another about the choices we make for ourselves. We contanstly have to put each other down.
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 2 February 2010:
Essence puts Halle Berry on the cover and she is married to a “freeloading washed up white man model”. She got two babies, her daughter and that white boy that she “pampers” too.
But Reggie Bush is a white supremacist?????????? He don’t freeload off his woman and he has a decent career. What the fuck is wrong those black women editors up at Essence?
No wonder these black magazines are going bankrupt.
How about they put Halle Berry back on the cover f Essence when she was 2 dollar hooker in the movie “Monster’s Ball”.
Her acting career hasn’t been the same since she did that movie.
Comment by bigeyes31 on 2 February 2010:
I don’t agree that reggie bush is a white supremacist but I wonder if Kim kardashian was a black woman whose claim to fame was a sex tape would he still be seen in public with her. He would treat her like the skank she is,sleep with her, keep her far away from his money and his momma. For instance, I haven’t seen ANY man place the “video vixen” on their arm in public recently,lol. Now she was once associated with Bill Maher(been a fan of his shows since Politically Incorrect btw,lol) but that fizzled REAL fast, go figure.
I figure Essence magazine is just like all the other black owned and run franchises….BET is anything but black. White men own that and look at the images it portrays on a constant basis to our black boys and girls. Black hair care products with the exception of 2-3 are still black owned and manufactured. I don’t care who reggie bush dates;I just wish he would be consistent when it comes to picking women of value.
I have to agree with L. Queens once again, if you got a point, you gotta a point. Halle Berry wins an oscar for riding a white man like a whore because he gave her a couple of rides to the store,lol Man get outta here.The same whole white man is the hero type stuff. Wow, I thank GOD I have good strong black (five)biological brothers to keep me balanced,lol. No oscar for Dorthy Dandrige, no oscar for Gothica, yeah keep thinking “eros, philia” and “philios” love will conquer all when it comes to white portral of the black woman…imagination and utopia.
Peace from the unassimilated.
Comment by bigeyes31 on 2 February 2010:
EDIT: It should have read:
Black hair care companies, with the exception of 2-3 remaining black owned and manufactured franchises, are owned by non-black people.
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 2 February 2010:
Dear Big Eyes
It is a damn shame Halle Berry got the Oscar for Monster’s ball. Denzel won one for Training day the same night. Denzel was gracious enough to let Halle bask in her glory. I admire Denzel for that. Denzel won for being a ‘crooked cop”. I do knock Halle Berry but the attraction to the “thug side” of life made Denzel’s career “take off”.
I personally think “Training day” really cemented his career.
Monster’s Ball did the “reverse for Halle Berry”. Kerry Washington is a great actress but in comparison to Halle “hell no”. Halle Berry just never got the recognition and she will never get after that “Monster’s ball” fiasco.
Black actresses have it hard, face it. If he wasn’t for Tyler Perry giving them exposure, man I can’t even say that. Black actresses are STILL hardly getting roles.
Now would Monster’s Ball been better for Halle without the “graphic scene”, hmmm maybe. Halle was great in “Losing Isiah”, “Boomerang”(underrated performance for a comedy). Dorthy Dandrige, how ironic. The singer that got used by white men and end died alone.
I won’t even get into “Precious”. I get mixed reactions about that movie. Some black women like the movie and some “hate” it. Yes, “Precious” black women do exist. Amazing.
Comment by bigeyes31 on 2 February 2010:
Yeah How could I forget my favorite movie Boomerang!Awesome comedy and I like losing Isiah as well,just forgot to mention them. Yeah Dorthy Dandrige it is sad that she ended up like that but then again she was our black Maryln Monroe who we all know had a checkered, freak past but look how she is still upheld as an icon by white folks, so I think if she can be forgiven,surely Dorthy Dandrige can.You have to look at the times,back in those days you had to go through the white power structure to get anywhere.Who owned the radio stations, the record companies? She must have felt like she had to make deals with devil,so to speak. I love Denzel but I didn’t like Training Day and still have never finished it. I mean if he is going to be given an oscar for being a “thug”, I think American Gangster should have been the one, frankly I saw better acting. I saw “Precious”, I mean I don’t hate it but I was more impressed with Monique. The only thing I’ll say is that we don’t recognize the Precious’ in our communities because many of them don’t physically look like precious.Many of them keep a smile on their pretty faces but are hurting inside. So, yes they do exist. I like the fact that Tyler Perry is doing the best can,employing black actresses and actors. I think he needs to change up his style;I’m tired of all the sap,lol. Overall though I like him.
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 2 February 2010:
Tyler Perry
Number 1 needs to stop wearing a dress!
Number 2 stop demonizing successful black women. He seems to have a dislike for Professional black women. He makes them look “evil”.
Number 3 Include more white characters and Hispanic characters.
Other than that, he is a good story teller.
Comment by bigeyes31 on 2 February 2010:
Yeah this is the time to show more diversity and do what white hollywood executives don’t do.LOL, I saw him in a very masculine role in the new Star Trek movie but I couldn’t see NOTHING but Madea, ha ha,lol. Type-casting himself is starting take root.
Comment by Ichibod on 3 February 2010:
Diversity. That’s why I respect The Hughes Brothers. They started with ‘Menace 2 Society’, but went on to do ‘Dead Presidents’, ‘New York, I Love You’, and ‘Book of Eli’.
Let’s not forget Halle’s role as a crackhead in ‘Jungle Fever’. I only liked her in the ‘X-Men’ movies and ‘Boomerang’. Denzel’s Oscar for best supporting actor in ‘Glory’ cemented his career, in my opinion. That’s when his name became synonymous with “fine black man”. No award for ‘Man on Fire’? ‘John Q’ (even though I hated that movie)? I’m not a Tyler Perry fan (because of the dress), but I liked ‘Why Did I Get Married’ because it dealt with some REAL marital issues, not some superficial, “black” relationship problems. I don’t like the demonizing of successful black women either, but I really hate when a black man is overly demonized like all of Michael Beach’s characters (Waiting to Exhale, Soul Food, First Sunday). The kind of character that in real life would have gotten his butt kicked a long time ago, but we’re forced to watch is antics for the sake of the storylines. And he seems like he’d be a cool guy if it wasn’t for the type casting.
Black actors and actresses have it hard unless we play the roles THEY want us to play. A strung-out black woman or another black man that can’t be trusted. Many of them need to examine whether the roles they’re accepting are really important enough and have the potential to make or break our image as a whole. Even Dave Chappelle said no to $50 million and then flew to Africa.
Comment by ErzulieRedEyes on 3 February 2010:
Tyler perry Is a clown!
he looks silly now! LOL
Comment by ZION82 on 3 February 2010:
This topic has become tiresome.
Comment by 12cuddlewith on 3 February 2010:
Again, i havent seen anyone comment on the article or what they saw or anything that was in the magazine….everyone ran quick to make an opinion and a judgement…..without taking a look at it but because he is a black man who dates out of his race….and this is what i still dont understand if EVERYONE is on a interracial dating site then why isn’t everyone open then and why are folks so damn judgemental…….people are too quick to make judgements and tell others what they have to do with their life. If Halle wants to date a white man so be it then…..why is it anyones problem….no one phucking him or her…….or is that what the problem is cause Halle wouldnt want ya. Now as i don’t agree with a black man generalizing what he doesn’t like in a black woman yeah it is annoying and yeah from what i have heard it is painful but for every black man that downs ya there is another man who won’t and will love you and appreciate you like you should…….but my question is why do black women think its all peaches and cream on our end either…..we all still deal with the issues of a man….whether he cheats, lies, play games, won’t commit, lives with his momma, or whatever goes with a relatiohship, or even if its a good relationship black women experience it to……the same shyt he doing to you you best beleive he is doing to another…..no matter what race she is……..but as of today, no one on here dictates my life….no one pushed me out of their vagina, no one is paying my bills and where in the book of life it says i have to date who everyone else thinks i should date. No one is in charge of me but myself, if i want to succeed in life….how can i do it..i have to make it happen….if i want a new car…who pays for it….i do…..if i want to date a single black man….whose decision is it……MINE! If everyone on here wants to freeking complain then don’t be on an interracial dating site, and if your on this site to start bs with people….get a freeking life…..I don’t mind talking and sharing opinions and what not but some of these comments are straight bs…..
And by the way Kim K is successful regardless of the sex tape….she was up and around before it….no one ever wants to look at the big picture but yet just point fingers…NO ONE knows where she would be regardless….she has a successful business amongst other things.
Comment by bigeyes31 on 4 February 2010:
LOL, Okay you have bumped your head and slung a pole. Nobody knew who Kim Kardashian was until she did the sex tape, the reality show and the businsess came AFTER THAT. She might have wanted to start a business regardless but the infamy and the money that followed help put her on her way. Please…,lol, the same way the “tell-all” book the Video Vixxen put her in the bigger spot-light. EVERYBODY knows that.
Comment by Archaic thinking on 4 February 2010:
YES!!!!!! You are awesome 12cuddlewith!! Finally a well deserved and justified response, stated soooo beautiful/.eloquently!. I hope of you read this post and use critical thinking before attacking. Life is too short, God wont turn a person away to enter the pearly gates based on color, mix or race; the same with the devil, he will gladly take anyone. In short, all the bickering is irrelevant in the scheme of life.
Besides Halle Berry is Mulatto/multi-racial, she is not “Black”, to some in America maybe, the uneducated and the one who subscribe the archaic 1 drop rule, and only if you speak English. Apparently it doesnt apply to Spanish, Portuguese or Middle Eastern people. Race,its all political in America. We rally are 1 race with a very few degrees of separation!
Comment by bigeyes31 on 4 February 2010:
Okay then Halle Berry herself must be subscribing to the one drop then because she has said out her own mouth that she is biracial but identifies as black. I agree with what you are saying to a degree but race DOES matter in this country,not in heaven but in this country.
Comment by Archaic thinking on 4 February 2010:
I totally agree with you bigeyes31! Halle did state that. She also in “America” alot of Mulattoes identify themselves as Black and some don’t. Have you ever pondered or question of what is Black in America? Look at the groups stated in my response. A lot of Latinos(Spanish,m Portuguese, French) who are born here and have visible African features don’t even identify as “Black”, just because they don’t speak English or have a Latin last name. Ridiculous eh.
Comment by bigeyes31 on 4 February 2010:
It’s all ridiculous and I wish that it weren’t so but it is and I’m a fan of dealing with it, facing the reality of it and then fixing the problem in my own way.
Comment by bigeyes31 on 4 February 2010:
@Ichibod
Big, Big ups to the Hughes Brothers. We are slowly making progress in Hollywood.Don’t forget DEAD PRESIDENTS, absolute oscar, golden globe material. I LOVE IT.
Comment by ErzulieRedEyes on 4 February 2010:
MULATTO is an archaic word, it was applied to people who are mixed and designed to attack the humanity of the person.
It means half one animal half another animal in spanish and when applied to a human it is an insult.
The word suggests you are half aniaal and not a whole human being. Just like the n word, designed to tear down a person’s humanity.
Don’t call people mulattos it is a racial slur coming from racist spanish people that invented it to make fun of “mixed” people.
Comment by bigeyes31 on 4 February 2010:
sorry Ichibod you did mention that movie.
Comment by 12cuddlewith on 4 February 2010:
@big eyes
you look just like a close friend of mine…..lol
Comment by 12cuddlewith on 4 February 2010:
i’m just not into assumptions….we can’t assume anything about what $ she has or had prior to the sex tape. None of us live their lives now or then….that would be like me saying something about you and you thinking “woman you don’t know me or my life”……some stuff have come after but none of us know what was in the works prior….if nothing was then so be it, either way i don’t care about that stuff. But folks act (not necessarily you) act like they know everyones life.
Life in general is tough, dating is tough so why add extra shyt to our lives and make it tougher. (general statement)
Comment by bigeyes31 on 4 February 2010:
nah…lol the sex tape made her famous, she might of had some money because her daddy was an attorney. The point of that was that she has done some questionable stuff and it has made her famous and placed on the A-list a black woman does it and she gets no love. Peace and love won’t change the fact that the two are treated and viewed differently in this country even after having done some of the same things. I KNOW, reggie bush wouldn’t have taken the Video Vixen home to mom.
Comment by 12cuddlewith on 5 February 2010:
I can agree with you to a certain extent….but with the sex tape she didn’t put it out there to make $, that happened behind her back without her knowledge, whereas Korrin Stephans (whom i am assuming your talking about) put her business out there for the world to see and to make $ at other people’s expense. No one knew she would prob expose them like that….whereas Kim i don’t think she woke up one morning and said hey lets make a video of us in an intimate moment and then sell it. If the video made her a lil more popular then so be it, we can’t prevent that nor knock her for folks liking her. Karrin isn’t doing so bad, she still has a second book, got married etc. Kim phucked one guy in a video, Karrin talks about ALL the men she phucked etc. There is a big difference to me. I guess it is what it is.
Comment by tatted2death on 5 February 2010:
LMAO@the “unassimilated” coming in a blog discussing their “mixed” background and sporting “silky/wavy”, LONG hair…..hmmmmm….
wonders NEVER cease……
Peace and Blessings (for those that REALLY need it)
tatted2death
Comment by bigeyes31 on 5 February 2010:
LMAO sporting “tattoos” all over one’s body trying to be “different” but ends up still being given the boot by a white man, now THAT’s a wonder that NEVER CEASES,lol. Who discussed their mixed heritage??I have never said I was mixed…some ink leakage must be the source of the the “disconnet” from reality,LMAO.
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 5 February 2010:
Hey 12cuddle.
(Waving)
Listen Kim K was doing her thing “before meeting Reggie Bush”.
Karrine Superhead had a hard life and had to “depend” on men to take care of her. A big difference here.
However, she got ahead in life makes me respect her survival instinct but she is a ‘damaged woman”.
Eddie Winslow from Family Matters even said she was crazy.
See, I don’t knock Karrine that much because they all deserve each other. The rich black men that fucked her while they were “married”. It takes some skill to keep rich black men coming “back”. She is cute but she there are many black women that are cute. She managed to “stand out” among the competition in “music videos and rap groupies”.
Like Eddie Winslow said ” You knew she was a snake but you still went and played with it. Now your shocked it bit you”.
The funny thing is rich black men STILL FUCK HER.
See, when black women say men are attracted to sluts. I can believe it. Even Bill Mahr (white guy) from HBO wanted the “slut”. He almost ‘wifed her”.
For the record, Karrine is an intelligent girl, articulate and can even ‘act”. I saw her in that movie with Vin Diseal. He played a cop wanting revenge for the death of his girlfriend from drug lords. She was Larenz tate “wife” in the movie.
That is why I don’t understand why she a slut!
Amazing.
Comment by tatted2death on 5 February 2010:
My tattoos are ALL spiritual in nature; never received in attempt to be more attractive to ANY MAN….PERIOD!!!…..thanks for your concern, bigeyes…..LOL. But OOOOO….we don’t want to go there…..not with one that “prays” to a grey-bearded white man in the sky….PFFFTTTTT.
…AND wow, you REALLY have caught “queens-fever”…..talk so much shyt in here you forget.
—-(paraphrasing)”my mom is the product of an interracial relationship”……pffft…..whatever.
AND yeah ICH….if you guys can come in here and have “pissing” contests….why not “mix it up a bit” with a “sista caught in a twista”???? Sometimes it just is what it is in here(lol)…..and some people only recognize THEIR “truth”….so I give it to them in terms they can understand.
Peace and Blessings
tatted2death
Comment by bigeyes31 on 5 February 2010:
DRAGGING,DRAGGING…LMAO. Man let me get out here and shop for me outfit for the superbowl party…LOL
Comment by bigeyes31 on 5 February 2010:
MY MOTHER IS of a black woman and a biracial(white and black) father(that MIGHT be why MY NATURAL HAIR IS ON MY BACK and thick,LOL) NOT ME, LOL. Look, I told y’all this woman is unstable. She caught in a time-space continuum…LOL LOL LOL.
Should I wear stiletto boots or pumps…LOL
Comment by fenway2k on 5 February 2010:
All these ‘educated’ opinions posted are still opinions.
But since most of the women in this post are classifying all black men into one group, I want to ask all women one question.
Why are you being hypocrites?
For all this huffing and puffing in outrage about black men and their choices being a symptom of a deeper dysfunction, you will sacrifice your preference of Black men in a heartbeat for the promise of security and stability in a relationship.
Out loud, Sistas say Black, Black, Black, but if a well to do White man expresses a SERIOUS interest in you, you would SERIOUSLY consider it.
I’m reminded of Dennis Rodman and his response to Black women’s criticism of his choice to date White women. He stated that when he was in high school and college, every black woman turned him down and talked bad to and about him, and refused to date him. In fact, the only women who expressed any interest in him when he was broke was White women.
But as soon as he became rich and famous, these same Black women came out the woodwork wanting to date him. His response to that was that Black women can keep on calling him ugly and ridiculing him because if you though he wasn’t good enough for you when he was broke, having money shouldn’t change that. So he will keep dating White women and Black women can keep kissing his ass.
Regardless of what you think of Dennis Rodman, his words ring true and many Black men can relate to his thinking. Look at a typical (not every) Black woman’s profile on a dating site and you will usually find a list of demands. If you aint this…if you dont have that….blah, blah, blah.
I applaud you on your success, but I as a Black man should not be made to feel like am at a job interview or on the witness stand when I am on a date with you.
I end my diatribe by stating that it is RIDICULOUS to interpret a person’s personal choices in dating as being a statement of their race pride or lack thereof.
It’s just simply their choice.
Comment by Archaic thinking on 5 February 2010:
So true fenway2k on 5 February.
Comment by neverdun17 on 5 February 2010:
In response to the Essence article, in my opinion the issue is not one of right or wrong. The issue is whether or not it was appropriate. Regardless of whether or not the exclusion of Reggie Bush and his relationship would have represented a bias against interracial relationships, the bottom line is that the magazine tailored to a certain audience. Black men’s perception of black woman or how we view black woman as potential partners is an entirely separate issue, as is the question of whether Reggie Bush’s relationship with Kim represents interracial dating or same race dating. (As a sidebar, I think anti-interracial dating mentality is seriously flawed). But again, the real question is whether or not it was appropriate. Considering the audience, it was a very poor choice by Essence.
If there was a magazine strictly for the K.K.K. and it had a cover showing a white man internationally known for dating a black woman, that cover would be entirely inappropriate. Of course that man dating a black woman is entirely his right and should not receive a negative response from ANYONE, but look at the audience. Marketing to and targeting a specific audience is the lifeblood of any magazine, so having Reggie Bush as part of that story/article was a gross and unforgivable oversight by the editing staff at Essence.
Comment by neverdun17 on 5 February 2010:
On the topic of the Essence reader’s negative response to Reggie Bush’s part of the article, while I disagree with her labeling Reggie as a white supremacist and implying that black men are automatically racist by dating a non-black woman, I think her response is entirely appropriate considering the fact Essence is “in essence”, HER magazine. Essence Magazine is written for black women. Period. Essence has always promoted and glorified the image of the black woman, so its entirely expected for its readers to be offended by ANY slight or implication that they any other race of woman deserves equal respect. The existence of the magazine itself supports and perpetuates a righteous belief that black women are either special in respect to women from other races or that they are superior in any way. It does not promote equality.
NOW HAVING SAID THAT, the uncomfortable truth is that the reality of Black American women IS separate and different from other women in America. They ARE victims of discrimination and at the opposite end of the spectrum of American culture’s image of beauty. The basis of what is considered most beautiful in America is the models of European high fashion. Fair skin that is tan but NOT dark, very slim with moderate curves, long flowing hair with lots of “body”, long eyelashes, high cheekbones and a small/petite nose, and lips that are full but not “too big”. Coming out of the womb, black women have completely contrasting features in each category. Dark skin, very curvy, short kinky hair, average/short eyelashes, proportional cheekbones, a larger/wider nose than other races, and bigger lips than other races. Looking at that perspective, how can a black woman leave childhood WITHOUT either hating her natural image or having a chip on her shoulder?? A Black American woman’s natural image is NOT considered anywhere close to what is considered to be most beautiful by the culture she lives in. But just like any other human being, she wants to be considered beautiful. She wants to be admired and sought after by the men she finds most attractive. She doesn’t want to feel like she has to be something that she’s not in order to have just a SHOT at being romantically happy. So most Black American women perm their hair to conform to the image of a what is considered beautiful. They will claim that they do so to make their hair more manageable, but the truth is that they think their natural, kinky hair is ugly and that they aren’t as attractive without that perm or those braids that mimic that straight-hair look.
I have a sincere question for the black women participating in this discussion. If you are altering the texture and look of your hair to more closely match the “style” that is obviously based on that of European women, and you are dressing in the clothing styles that are set by European fashion/white culture, aren’t you holding the image of a white/European woman in higher esteem than your natural image as a black woman, kinky hair/ curvy figure and all? I am not challenging the necessity of conforming to this image in order to be considered attractive or respectable in this society because that is entirely true. I am simply pointing out the reality that by doing so, you are sending a message to everyone that you hold society’s standard of beauty higher than your own. And if that is what you’re doing, what you are doing is no different than what many black men are doing, which is finding that standard or image of beauty more attractive than that of your own. From that perspective, wouldn’t it make sense for ANY man in our society, regardless of race, to pursue what everyone seems to think is most beautiful? Yes, you are being discriminated against, but by conforming to this standard of beauty, you are also discriminating against yourself. In my opinion, Black American women cannot expect for ANY man to appreciate their worth and beauty until they do so themselves. It isn’t fair. No other race has to go through all of this just to be cherished and appreciated. No other race of women has to risk being considered unattractive or unprofessional by wearing their natural hair. But that is the society that you happen to have been born into. That is your reality. Until you define yourselves as being beautiful, no one else will.
Comment by Bri on 5 February 2010:
I love how all the individuals who express contempt with the Black woman who dares to express an opinion that isn’t in the form of kissing a Black man’s ass conveniently reference the posts they want to in this forum. If you’re going to reference the “huffing and puffing” you might as well mention the negative commentary about Black women you had to pass on your way to pick out the huffs and puffs. When a Black man feels it’s his God-given right to run through all the things that are wrong with Black women while dating out may “simply be a choice” it is foolhardy to ignore how ignorant of a choice that is and from whence it really comes. A lot of us are speaking from experience, we don’t have to make these things up for our health. I’ve listened to Black men, who I was in relationships with, deliver manifestos on how woman of other races are endowed with this wealth of goddess like features and attributes to my face….opinions like that coming from a brown-skinned BLACK man are indicative of a deeper dysfunction. Stop making blanket comments about interarcial dating, especially ones that display a one-sided bias. On one hand you want to make a generalization in favor of Black men in interracial relationships but then criticize the dating choices of Black women? For starters I wouldn’t necessarily consider Rodman to be a wise sage full of insights into human nature but whatever, if you say so..Second a woman not dating a broke man is not a color issue, that’s called having a standard. Why would a woman want to date a grown man who hasn’t achieved financial stability?..Better yet, why would a man of any color even want to represent himself that way to a woman? Not too mention if that’s the example you want to use you might as well diversify your portfolio..let’s look at that scenario from two sides…how many Black male celebrities have Black ex-wives, ex-girlfriends, and fathered children with the Black women from their community, the women they grew up around but then decided to cross the color line only after they became famous?..there are more of those type of Black male celebrities than there are Rodmans. No one is classifying Black men into one group except the people saying things like “it is RIDICULOUS to interpret a person’s personal choices in dating as being a statement of their race pride or lack thereof”…that my friend is a generalization as is “Look at a typical (not every) Black woman’s profile on a dating site and you will usually find a list of demands. If you aint this…if you dont have that….blah, blah, blah.” Unfortunately the Black women not arguing the affirmative are probably ones who have personal experiences with Black men who do have issues, so no, things will not just be taken at face value and swept under the rug. Though you may not be one yourself to pretend you don’t have peers who fall into the “I have self image and mommy issues so resent Black women and take it out on my dating partners who have nothing to do with my personal problems or choose to only date outside of my own race” is silly. I’m still laughing at the if a White man expresses serious interest in you you seriously consider it…wow, so chossing a relationship that is sure to be stable is somehow a flaw…a woman of any color would entertain a relationship from a man of any color who expressed a serious interest in her…what are you saying? The only thing Black women are guilty of is being loyal to a fault, if Black women want to be with Black men it’s because we care about preserving our family structure and community something Black men could care less about….check the statistics on Black single mothers….that has everything to do with Black men leaving, not an unwillingness of Black women to date or marry Black men. Not too mention we outdegree Black men 2:1…a college educated Black women likely works around successful men of all colors, the least percent of them being Black…a typical Black woman would have to go out of her way to even find a broke Rodman type but somehow we still manage to go back to our communities and encourage positive images of Black love for future generations to look up to..versus the Black male modus operandi of desert and defect as soon as I become interesting enough to get a woman of another race who for damn sure wouldn’t have looked twice at me before my promotion, record deal, movie deal or NBA draft to hang off my jock strap. Don’t make references against Black women that can easily go both ways if you don’t want someone to point out the two-sidedness of your statements.
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 5 February 2010:
I read Bri and Fenway’s statements
The Dennis Rodman thing is true to a certain degree. He was a janitor and I don’t even think he got drafted. Long story short, Dennis said he always had white girls interested in him.
How many black women will date an “alternative man”. The weirdos with different color hair and strange clothing. Most black women are “conservative”. The have an idea of what a man “should be”.
Contrast Dennis Rodman to Mike Tyson. Mike had white women that liked him in Upstate NY where he trained to box with Cus. Upstate is mainly white people. When Mike got all that money he was with “a lot of black women”. You think they would have been with him if he was in Bedstuy Brooklyn being a club bouncer. My answer is YES. BECAUSE Black women have an idea “what a man should be”.
Not many black women are turned on by a man like Dennis Rodman is might be bisexual or whatever the case. But you will have black women attracted to Mike Tyson. Just like black women find R Kelly attractive and he is a damn child molester.
Fenway is right that black women have this list that you must “conform” to. It is like a job interview to date some black women.
Bri makes good points but the problem with black women. They focus on the fraction of the fraction of A PERCENT of black men that are rich. LOL
It reminds of this white guy that said why black men don’t got jobs. They got basketball and football!
Like every black men can play sports and rap. The fact is a majority of black men are with black women. A majority of black men are married to black women.
You said this
“Second a woman not dating a broke man is not a color issue, that’s called having a standard. Why would a woman want to date a grown man who hasn’t achieved financial stability?..Better yet, why would a man of any color even want to represent himself that way to a woman?”
Why would any man take on a black woman with kids by different men?
Some of these black women have the audacity to say I am a package deal. What does that mean exactly? I have to take care of your kids too that are not biological mine?
Na I ain’t take care of Dequan, Shamika, and Lakisha.
You never ask the white man to do that. Black men never get the credit we deserve. We take on women with kids by previous men. We date full figured women.
I am out.
Comment by fenway2k on 5 February 2010:
@Bri…
Maybe you should read the comment I posted before this one. Once again someone takes an opinion, chooses to take offense at said opinion, and in ‘typical’ fashion chooses to flex their ‘intellectual prowess’ to attempt to put me in my place about said opinion, not in an effort to enlighten or educate.
Let me state again that I have no contempt for Black women, and I don’t see how you could ever derive that from my post. I was only speaking to a very select group of women, those ON THIS POST who criticize Black men for dating White women as if they were betraying their race or have some kind of dysfunction. It is my experience that some of those same women would date outside their race as well if the white… er…right opportunity presented itself….and by your own admission no less!
You in your effort to put me in my place failed to see the place my post held. so let’s get black for a minute…
I personally don’t give a damn who dates who. If you choose to date a White man, fine! If they can give you what you want, need, and desire, then I wish you the best. I don’t care that you date outside your race. Your choice as an adult and I respect that. I got a life with bills to pay and since none of you pay mine, your opinions and preferences mean squat to me.
2) Who people date is their own choice and their own business, period. It is RIDICULOUS for the peanut gallery to sit back, look at my life or Rodman’s or Bush’s, and present SPECULATION AND CONJECTURE about the how our personal choices impact the Black Struggle. I date whoever the hell I want, have dated women of all nationalities, am currently dating a Black woman, and race was NOT a consideration in my choices. They were based upon who they were as women, period. And who the hell said Rodman had to be a wise sage to have experienced scorn and ridicule from Black women, only to turn around and have them talk about him for dating White women?
3)In ‘typical’ fashion you and every one like you (believe me you are not alone) want to put yourself up here and put Black men down there. All your stats are fine, even true but there is one fact you conveniently overlooked:
THEY DON’T TYPIFY BLACK MEN!
All the relationship issues you and your Sista Girls have with Brothas simply reflect their individual shortcomings as men, not because they are Black. Your facts about Black woman smart, Black man dumb is duly noted…I’ll go get another degree to compliment the two I already have.
It’s a shame that all the bitterness that exudes from YOUR diatribe has jaded you into thinking that the color of a person’s skin is the reason people are the way they are.
My point has been and always will be that what a person does is their choice and their business. To insinuate race and color into everything someone does is ridiculous. So shame on those in THIS POST ( not every woman) who alluded to such.
There Bri…are you happy now?
Comment by 12cuddlewith on 6 February 2010:
Mr. L Queens
I can understand she had to do what she had to do….i guess to survive…..I don’t knock her for it but yet i don’t condone it…..i just remember watching a thing i beleive on A & E about Video Vixens and she spoke well yes…but i felt like she was giving out this whole warning….don’t do it message…blah blah blah but then she still at it….she wants to be the savior of video ho’s but yet she publishes these books. Don’t get me wrong some men will run to booty based on the fact she can suck a d….so it’s like those mens morals and beliefs are all out the window because they want a taste of superhead and look at what it got em…..exposed like the cheating dogs they are. I mean does she want her kid knowing you got by in this world cause you blew dyck. lol…if she proud then i guess i am proud lol. Men seem to forget she isn’t the only woman black or white who can give a good blow job, but i am sure we all are alot more choosier on who we blow lol
Comment by Ichibod on 6 February 2010:
I saw the flick with Karrine Steffins and Mr Marcus a couple of years ago.
SUPERHEAD!!! I’ve never seen anything like it. She tries to promote new books and refuses to talk about her first book when asked about it. It’s what got her known. No one would know who she was if it weren’t for her talking about who all she slept with… and describing her escapades in detail.
It was, however, messed up what Ray J did to Kim. A radio show played the voicemail she left him after he release the sex tape. She was screaming like a little girl. It was pretty sad to hear. But I saw that video as well. WOW! Ray J is a fool.
Comment by fenway2k on 6 February 2010:
@12cuddlewith @ Ich
You have opened up an entirely different can of worms there.
Obviously people don’t start out in life with the same set of ground rules, morals, values or beliefs.
As a result, people make mistakes, and depending on the guidance or lack thereof from positive influences, some make worse mistakes than others.
Karen Steffans obviously started out thinking that controversy, and her ‘abilities’ sexually would get her paid. It amazes me that people are shocked by her behavior…her mentality at that time is not uncommon. The thousands of groupies, call girls, escorts, and prostitutes attest to that.
I never have a problem with another person’s “hustle” so to speak, as long as it is a means to an end. Master P took his dope money and turned himself into a multi-million dollar conglomerate. You think he was the only one who did that?
What I do see is Karen putting her past behind her. What a lot of people don’t see is that along the way, Karen was exposed to a better lifestyle, higher education, and renewed sense of self-worth. In other words, she grew up.
Think of all the gangster rappers that break into the business. They all follow the same business model the White executives make them follow…”Nigga this…Bitch that…Imma kill you and yo Momma..”
But along the way they grow up as well. You couldn’t pay Ice Cube to come out with another ‘Phuck Tha Police’. While that is a part of him, that’s no longer what defines him. Now he is a family man and a very accomplished movie producer as well. I bet a lot of you don’t realize that he has been in close to 50 movies as an actor.
The same can be said for Snoop, Ludacris, 50 Cent, Jay Z…their first albums were all street and ‘keeping it real.’ Now they sing ballads and songs about who they are as men. They all grew up. And you would have to be a damn fool to think that they didn’t go back to school and educate themselves along the way.
I said all that to say this…The hooker formerly known as Superhead has now grown into a woman of worth named Karen Steffans. She has put her past behind her like a lot of people have before her and is living her life now.
Just a shame that society keeps taking her past and shoving it back in her face.
Comment by fenway2k on 6 February 2010:
I tried to misspell her name in an effort to protect the innocent…LOL
Comment by 12cuddlewith on 6 February 2010:
@fenway
yeah i don’t think she would notice we are talking about her lmao!
Comment by 12cuddlewith on 6 February 2010:
I don’t have a problem with people getting their hustle on and i never said otherwise…all i am saying is i think she was looking more at the $ then how people would be feel for being put out there like yeah. They chose to sleep with her they are grown men making grown folks decisions so its up to them to make the right decision. But i think after book 1 she got a lil greedy and came out with book 2…….i mean is she that hard up for $….and book 2 from my understanding didn’t sell as good. Now don’t get me wrong i did read book 1 and i know she had a rough life but she could of changed that herself, she played too much of the blame game. She can’t be mad at no one for throwing anything in her face if she was the one in charge of her life making those decisions…..and she is the one who threw her business out there like that…..she let the whole world know whats up so no one should get made that its in her face…..don’t put it in ours…thats my opinion….she might be trying to get her life back in order and move on but really…..is she?
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 6 February 2010:
Dear Fenway
Karrine Superhead is just a smart SLUT. She has not grown up or anything like that. I disagree with you on that. Yea she did hustle to survive but that does not change who you are. On top of that, she is a snitch. The reason I call her that not because I am from the streets.
The cardinal rule is if you are “doing dirt” with people, which was prostitution. You know what it was getting involved with these men. It’s all good when the “money is coming in”. But when you are struggling you write a book about black men TO bring them down. They was married but you knew that. You got to take the “good with the bad”. She should have saved her money instead of thinking these rich black men was going to “support you forever”. What did it get her anyway? Their wives are still with them. Ja rule wife with him. Shaq and his wife might reconcile. It is not like their wives was leaving.
For the record Ice T “put her on” YEARS AGO. He said he felt sorry for the girl when she came out to California with her son at the time IN THE 90S. He knew “Kool G Rap” and at the time, she “spin the story like” he abused her. Ice T said she was “passed around” to other rappers. But he could see “that she was soaking up the game”. Ice T said “man don’t fuck with her” she sneaky. He said this, way before, she screwed people over.
Again, these celebrity black men still FUCK WITH HER to this day. She must be a super freak for real. She ain’t change her ways lol. She was in the 50 cents video with Robin Thicke. That happened by accident? I don’t think so.
I agree rappers talks about the same thing.I don’t like the ballads and all that dance music. I still like “gangsta rap”. It depends on the artist. Those “real rap artists” are a dying breed. You got kids from middle class families being hardcore rappers.
Basically, that is why the music is not as good as it used to be.
I am from Southside Jamaica Queens. I might be biased because Russell Simmons is from here. 50 cents and etc. I pretty much know who is the real deal or not. Them boys in New Orleans are real too. Master P, arguably the most untalented rapper/CEO to ever get rich. All Master P and Baby from Cash Money did was steal the publishing from their artists and then dump them. Keep all the money for themselves. There is nothing “noble” about that.
They rip each other off to get rich. Puffy, Baby and Master P. They just happened to be smart enough to “trap” them in deals.
What impresses me about Jayz. He was strong enough to breakaway from these crab ass negros like Dame Dash and Biggs. They don’t rap but they getting half of everything. Tour money and all that shit. You spending money on whores and various cars and houses and you don’t even rap! How long can you carry these “negros”. I don’t blame Jayz.
Anyway, gangsta rap will always be around. Because this is a very macho culture. You got R&B singers with tattoos for god’s sake. Gangsta R&B singers. Women sort of like that.
My woman like “Neyo”. I think he is homo. But you can’t tell her that; she just think he is so great. I told her if I catch Neyo, I will whip his ass, if I could get past security.
12 Cuddle you are right on everything.
Comment by bigeyes31 on 6 February 2010:
Kim Kardashian is slut and Karrine”Super Head” is a slut. Why is one on the A-list and the other on “sH@!t list? A black woman does the same thing,be provacative and slutty and tries to ride it to fame and fortune. Karrine haven’t been invited to no talk shows, she haven’t been invited to talk to Matt Lauer,lol whatever. The point is both have done some slutty things but Kim Kardashian can at least say she got more for her trouble. Karrine might be married now but I bet he’s an average Joe. Most black men with money, or a high profile career would not bring home a black woman with that kind of track record, but he can bring home Kim Kardashian, because in America slut means something else when you are non-black.
Comment by fenway2k on 6 February 2010:
@ Mr. Queens
Points taken. However, let me give you an analogy to further express my point.
When I was in my teens and early 20’s I had a very short temper. I eventually came to realize that I was the problem and made the decision to change my ways. that decision was instantaneous. However it took several years to realize that change because I was familiar and comfortable with the habits I developed. Although I knew inside that I wanted to change, I had to work hard to make that change evident to others. I found that even though my outbursts were coming fewer and farther in between, when they did happen, people would always say, “See! You ain’t changed a bit.”
Apply that to Ms. Steffins. I believe she is changing because she is making the effort to no longer glorify her ‘claim to fame.’
But those former habits are hard to change or refocus because they come naturally to her. Obvious mistake to write the second book, but that just gives credence to the old Negro credo, “give a Nigga a foot and they take a yard.” Kind of like a dope dealer that tries to make a career out of selling dope.
I have faith that she will get it together eventually. She reminds me of the girl in The Players Club. Takes a little longer for some to get it. I just wish her the best. I know Eddie Winslow does, lol!
Comment by Bamabelle2k9 on 6 February 2010:
@To the Group. This is exactly my point. Black men b*tching about black women and black women b*tching at black men. To all of you maybe the problem is not the group, but hey how about this, judge the indidivual instead. WOW right.
Halle Berry has a right to date who she wants and maybe because she is rich and famous, she wants to take care of her man. Lots of rich and powerful women do this. Hell Monique admitted that herself that in her first marriage, she took care of her husband. I never saw Monster’s Ball because like Precious is now, it’s so talked about I don’t need to see it. But Halle can pretty much write her own pay check after she won the Oscar. How many other black actor’s can do that in Hollywood?
The woman who you speak quite frankly are slutty but I give Kim K some credit, she is a business woman and hasn’t written a tell-all about all the men she screwed in her lifetime. It’s women like Super Head who give black women a bad name because there are men out there who see her and think we are ALL like that.
I like Tyler Perry. Tyler Perry wearing that dress has allowed him to become a multi-millionaire and become his own boss. A concept a lot of us don’t get. People made fun of Hattie McDaniel for being a maid in Gone with the Wind but you know what she said? I’d rather play a maid then be one.
Tyler Perry realized in order for him to make the kind of movies he wants to make, he has to have enough money to do it, therefore he puts on a dress and acts like woman. Ask Spike Lee if he wish he had the same freedom as Tyler does.
We got to stop people really. That’s our main problem as black folks is we don’t stick together. As I said before and I’ll say it again, you don’t other races doing that now do you? But we just can’t seem to help ourselves.
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 6 February 2010:
LOL Fenway
I agree with your points. Black men are not immune to wanting to change “bad girls”. In my younger “years”, I frequented the strip clubs. Obviously, in the hood it is a trophy to have a good looking girlfriend and if she was a stripper that didn’t hurt. You want the woman with the stripper body but without the “bad reputation”.
I would be lying to you if I didn’t think Karrine wasn’t attractive. I can understand “Eddie Winslow” getting infatuated. Eddie fucked up because he is a Christian and dumped his “church girl fiancee” for Karrine. He should have known better.
Maybe, if Karrine wasn’t as successful and not “kept” herself up. Your opinion on her might change.
I always liked the “intelligent” side of her. That is what is so compelling about her. Oh yea, and her persistence to be with a rich black men. She makes it happen and her track record proves it.
She was on Jamie Foxx radio show and he always “blows her off”. Karrine just kept on trying to seduce him. I started realize how she operates.
Hey Big eyes
The Kim K comparison to Karrine.
Kim K daddy was the Lawyer for OJ during his trial.
Karrine comes from a broken home.
Kim K , yea the sex tape came out but she was running her own business from the age of 20 years old. She was getting money from 19 years old.
Karrine whoring around with rappers for scraps in her early days.
The fact that Kim K is white is a factor. But it could be a “class” thing too. Her step daddy is Bruce Jenner. I just don’t see the comparison.
You can call Kim K whatever. But she is sort of a ’self made woman”. She had businesses going without relying on a man for a long time.
Karrine did a “come up” on rich black men and profited from it. Now, can she gain money without using people to get ahead?
Karrine is a survivor, she overcame obstacles that a normal black girl wouldn’t be able to overcome. Right now, she is trying to distance herself from her “past” and she is getting frustrated. She doesn’t even like being called “Super head”. That is a prison of her own “doing”.
There are so many black women that dislike Karrine. She said “why you mad at me when you all doing it too”. Her arrogance really got black women upset. Perhaps, there are some things you shouldn’t talk about. Karrine might have messed up some hustles for black women involved with rich black men.
It is a dirty game.
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 6 February 2010:
Dear Bama
I agree we much treat each other as individuals. However, Tyler “Cherry needs to take that damn dress off already. He was successful at making the “buffoonery” of black people profitable for himself. He also has a penchant for “putting down” professional black women.
He did that shit in Madea goes to jail I think. The man ended up with a prostitute instead of his Lawyer fiancee. Now what she did to “Rudy” was wrong but marrying a prostitute? Tyler “Cherry” gets an F on that one.
Tyler “Cherry” did a “Family that preys”, again another successful black woman screwing her man over. It almost like he dislikes successful black women for some reason.
Spike Lee was right calling him out on it.
Halle Berry won for being a two dollar hooker in Monster’s ball.
That wasn’t even her best performance. Go watch Losing Isiah. What was the point of Monster’s ball anyway??????????You tell me. I don’t know.
Hattie McDaniel comparison to Tyler Perry is kind of far fetched. She played a stereotypical character. LOL, not really considering the professions for black women were maids and house wives and other “things” that should remain “nameless”.
Hattie was a pioneer but she got criticized by black people for doing “maid roles”. Black actresses and black actors were relegated to “butler and maid roles”.
Hattie said ” I rather get paid 700 dollars acting as a maid then getting paid 7 dollars to be one”.
LOL
Also, you left out the white audience being mad that Hattie stole scenes from Katherine Hepburn. That was how good an actress she was.
Tyler “Cherry” has the power to break those stereotypes but the drag queen won’t do it.
Comment by Archaic thinking on 6 February 2010:
Mulatto is only an insult to SOME, in the Caribbean, and NOT a racial slur
anywhere in the world! Maybe archaic term in America for some , but not a
racial slur! Some parts of Africa ( some regions use ‘coloured’)Latin
America and also some Americans also use that terminology and identify as
such. Look at mulatto.org, frenchcreoles. com we use that terminology to
define ourselves . Some people, mostly Black Americans who are NOT Mulattoes
have a problem with that, why does it concern them? Are they afraid it will
diminish their numbers? There is an alternate terminology used- Creole-
(mostly Louisiana). Some Mulattoes in America buy into the propoganda that
it is negative, again their is hisatory of proud self-identification, look
at Langston Hughes as an example (Google Mulatto and Hughes) among other
self-proclaimed Mulattoes and look at Haitian Mulattoes(Google Haitian war)
That 1/2 animal stuff is used to negate and refinforce our identity as
Mulatto to force the choice of being identified as Black . In addition, its
not the same as the ‘N’ word! You will never hear the dreaded ‘M’ word
meaning Mulatto. We can take the negative connotations and make it positive,
that has being done alot in this country with words, all semantics and
periodic. Well,its all seems to be regional anyway; whats offense to some,
is a pride to another depending on region. Anyway, you cant always trust
wiki! Research other sites or books. In the Caribbean, Mulattoes have a
history by ourselves ex. Haiti, Jamaica,Dominica Republic, Guadeloupe,
Colombia,etc. Look at ‘youtube’ of those of us who identify as such-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bcO1AUbSsvw
Comment by ErzulieRedEyes on 6 February 2010:
There are alot of self-hating mixed black people that don’t want to be called black.
But white people call anyone that looks black, black they don’t care if you are mixed or not, the whites created the one drop rule to keep white people seperate from the black race.
Since it is racist white people that first seperated themselves from darker skin people and drew the lines between people ask them to give you a new category.
Whites are the ones that created categories for people based on their skin color.
Mulatto sounds as silly as quadroon and octoroon.
If it were up to me i would just call myself human but its up to white people because we live in a white supremacist world and white people don’t see me as human because my skin color does not match theirs so they label me as black.
Comment by Archaic thinking on 6 February 2010:
You stated a lot of accurate facts. However, how can you call what people identify themselves as “silly”? The terminology is regional,its used internationally, some folks call themselves Creoles, in some parts of Africa its Mulatto and ‘Coloured (mixed race)What about the classification “Black” to some it would sound silly. If a alot of Mulattoes or mixed race classification called themselves Black, that would be silly since 1st and 2nd generation Mulattoes are Brown skinned. I totally agree with you, Human is more appropiate as there is just a few degrees of separation regardless of mixture.
Comment by Bri on 6 February 2010:
No one was trying to put anyone in place, I just pointed out that your blanket statement with RIDICULOUS in caps is not true, especially when you’re having conversations with the individual who posted such garbage about Black women as we’re named “Shameka” and have “2 or 3 children” and other posts from Black men to the effect of we’re “fat” and “have bad attitudes” etc, etc. To then say that who someone dates is not indicative of a deeper dysfunction is false. This forum is full of evidence to prove it. What I derived from your post is a need to have a counter-argument for a Black woman taking issue with the type of Black man who could say those types of things about Black women…I didn’t realize that we were defending the Black man’s right to bigotry. The posts being made by Black women aren’t lists of all the things that are off-putting about Black men put there are plenty of men here who carry pocket anthologies filled with reasons why no one would ever want to date a Black woman. Maybe you should try responding to some of those men if you don’t fall into that category..but responding to me is silly because until Black men like that don’t exist there will always be two sides to the issue of interracial dating and Black women have every right to express their opinion. The fact that Black women date out of their race shouldn’t be taken at face value either. There are plenty who do so for the wrong reasons, the difference between me and you is I have no problem admitting that. The criticism here is not for dating out it’s for dating out for the wrong reasons. No one has said not to date who you want but as some of the Black women here have their own negative experiences with Black men to refer to, the message being sent is to stop endorsing interracial dating as a whole and making excuses for the Black men who do exist that date for the wrong reasons.
The fact that you find it ridiculous that as a Black woman I attribute significance to the examples Black men set only proves my point further. What you all should really just say is as a Black man I don’t think the state of our race is important in the slightest so stop expecting me to do so. As a Black man I don’t expect you to care that Black men and women are still portrayed in very negative stereotypes in popular media, I don’t expect you to notice the message Black men choose to send with their public image and I don’t expect you to know the harsh realities that exist for many Black people in America… I know better than to expect a Black man to be attentive to those types of things. I don’t expect you to get that Black brands who depend on Black consumership to survive don’t even feature Black images, I don’t expect you to take note when Black magazines started by us don’t even feature Black people anymore, I don’t expect you to blink twice when Black tv networks bombard Black youth with images of drugs, sex and violence, I don’t expect you to observe the number of Black men who are walking stereotypes of what White society expects them to be, I know better than to think you could possibly make any connection between the number of Black fatherless children and the fact that Black children have the highest rates of victimization when it comes to physical abuse, sexual abuse and rape, nor do I expect you to pay attention to the fact that domestic violence occurs more frequently in Black homes in comparison to others…Why would you bother to know the mortality rate of young Black men, or how many Black children die from gun violence in urban communities…We’re minorities but we currently surpass all other races in every area of familial and community dysfunction…use your two degrees to figure out the probability of a group of people counting for less than 1/3 of the entire population in the United States having the most incidences of intra-community dysfunction. You think there isn’t a single connection between the state of our race and Black men who not only think the most rude, crass and baseless things about Black women but ones who actually have no shame in saying their idiotic thoughts out loud?…for every one of you how many Black men do you think there are who read the asinine remarks some of the Black male posters made about Black women and nod and agree? You don’t think that contributes any to the state of our Black community in this day and age? What school did you go to again?? The actions of Black men have everything to do with our community because we currently have few who are leaders, few who are role models, and few who accept the responsibility of fatherhood. If that doesn’t describe you then you are a minority within our race, give yourself a pat on the back…the difference between all the stereotypes being put forth about Black women and the issues I’m citing now is that they are not just my ignorant opinion, they are FACTS. And yes for some Black men their personal choices are reflective of a disconnect with being Black which is why they contribute very little to fixing the issues on our cultural homefront. I don’t care who you date, I do care however if as a Black male you don’t care about your own community..which may in turn be evidenced in your relationship decisions. I also don’t owe anyone an apology for caring about the way Black men choose to represent themselves when collectively as a people we have a lot left to fix about our own homes. It’s 2010 and the recently crowned Miss America happened to be a Black woman who was referred to as an ape of a woman and a crack whore who should go back to the corner she came from so she can sing for crack rocks….you think we’ve arrived? Seriously? We haven’t even started to do the work necessary to equalize ourselves. There ARE individual shortcomings to which Black people are predisposed as a result of the disparity thats exists between our economic status, educational achievements and collective self esteem in comparison to other racial groups. You would be hard-pressed to find a Black adult who doesn’t fit into one or more of the above categories. There ARE plenty of issues that effect Black men and women at a disproportionate rate in comparison to other races so when coming across a partner in dating who has certain shortcomings to ignore the connection those shortcomings have to race is naive. As long as White majority America is not ever going to give a damn then those among us who are socially aware will continue to notice when Black America ceases to give a damn too and express our concern.
No one said Black men are dumb but I’m not going to cosign for any who make general statements about all Black men simply because they esteem themselves to be the way, the truth and the light. You are not the end all be all representation of the Black male mentality…if none of the posts by Black women apply to you is it impossible to acknowledge that statistically there are more who do fit that description than aren’t? If you were more humble it would be easy to admit that our race is full of people with color issues so it can’t be said that people don’t date for the wrong reasons. I also have a problem with you all going so far as to play the victim in this situation. No one is attacking your personal dating choices, I don’t even know you…but you wouldn’t refer to rape as sex would you? No! Terms such as rape, incest, statutory rape and then sex all exist for different reasons and you shouldn’t have to personally experience any of the former to know it’s not the latter…so when someone generalizes that ALL interracial dating relationships are love, yes, please expect the Black woman who knows for a fact on account of the Black man who is or was in her life to challenge that type of ignorant remark. The personal choices of Black men do effect our race struggle if they are the result of an apathetic mentality towards their own communities so therefore not everyone is quick to be a cheerleader for the choices that affect our experience negatively. But I guess if you belong to the school of thought that says a Black woman who wouldn’t date a cross-dressing drug addict (Rodman) but would date a successful man of any race is somehow a hypocrite then I guess this all Greek to you?….
And your cosigner should read and reread..I referenced job promotion in addition to sports and music as ways in which Black men get ahead, but how ironic of him to point out my non-existent generalizations and then go on to say: “Why would a man want to date a Black woman with kids by different men?” When did he complete the survey on Black women with children? Could you ask him to please post the results so we can all be as enlightened as him? He knows for a fact it’s typical for a Black woman with children to have several different fathers for them? There aren’t women of all races who have kids with different men?? That’s my point exactly..Black men like him have a preset stereotype in mind of what Black women are and then make personal life decisions based on that stereotype. Is his head chockfull of stereotypes about women of other races too…or just us? Oh, let me guess, the generalizations he makes about women of other races are probably positive…he just reserves the negative statements for us…and then he goes on to say “Na I ain’t take care of Dequan, Shamika, and Lakisha. You never ask the white man to do that. Black men never get the credit we deserve. We take on women with kids by previous men. We date full figured women.”
This is your cosigner, this is the type of Black man the statements you make appeal to, someone who would generalize that Black women name their children Dequan and Lakisha..who feel they can tell a Black woman what she would and wouldn’t do in a relationship with a man of another race because Black men know our thoughts so well and who thinks we’re all fat….bravo both of you…If you feel you don’t have something in common with this person then maybe you should take a second look at what the statements you’re putting forth are really saying because it’s apparent he sure thinks he has a lot in common with you….maybe you could let your friend here borrow one of your degrees
I’m also 20 with an advanced Engineering degree from an Ivy League College, I didn’t start a degree war with you but I’m not uneducated either, just an fyi, my name doesn’t end in -isha and I don’t have any children for the peace of mind of you and your boyfriend….you must have some sensitivity attached to how smart you are or aren’t perceived by complete strangers though because I didn’t make any statements about the level of education you achieved.. I made a factual statement about college attendance among Black adults and you felt burned…personal problem that has nothing to do with me…yes there are twice as many Black women who receive college educations than there are Black men…thankfully you belong to the group of Black men who is educated but what I said above was not an opinion, it’s a fact…Black men love to ignore that at the end of the day the statements I make are rooted in reality versus the statements of your cosigner which are rooted in opinion…just because you don’t fall into any of those categories doesn’t mean denial will change the statistics that exist about our demographic, action will, but denial won’t…parading around high falutin because you did something with your life won’t change the fact that until more Black people like us exercise some sense of pride in connection to the race with which we identify instead of a disconnect from the people who look like us but don’t live like us our community will continue to suffer and you my friend will continue to be a deviation from the norm…your personal choices have EVERYTHING to do with the place we hold as minorities in America…I can’t believe you could even convince yourself otherwise…that has to be one of the stupidest things I’ve ever read
Comment by Constant Bitching on 7 February 2010:
I have noticed that a lot of Black American women b**** about “their” men dating White women. My observation it seems that Black American women are the only ethnic group that whine,and find problems with such relationships. Wa-wa-wa! You don’t hear White women complaining about white men, who are the largest(traditionally) group in interracial relationships dating Filipinos, Asians,Latinos, etc. You don’t hear Asian women, American Indian who are a real minority complain, Mulatto women, any other non-black group complain nearly as much as Black women. If White women did that they would be branded racist, what a double standard! Black women you dont own Black men, just as White women don’t own White men! Love does not know color, Jim crow and slavery is dead, people can choose now regardless of color. A few years ago there were complaints about Mulatto women,and women looking too Caucasian(East African- Iman) on the cover of some Black magazine,-,many complaints! Black men and Black women(non-African American),really don’t care about such issues as some Black women in America. It would be easier to accept and love someone regardless of race and stop trying to find differences and focusing on the past, just move on. That applies to Whites also! Men in general love women who don’t always bitch and are not too demanding, that’s why sooo many men Black and White are going overseas (Latin America, East Africa, Asia, East Europe,Ukraine, Russia) to find traditional educated women, some want traditional and passive,; that’s their choice- they have peace &satisfaction at least!. These women treat the man like a man like to be treated and do not want to own a mans b***s.
Comment by Bamabelle2k9 on 7 February 2010:
@Mr Laurelton Queens actually it was Vivian Leigh as Scarlet O’Hara not Katherine Hepburn. In fact Clark Gable almost didn’t go to the party for the movie in Atlanta because Hattie McDaniel wasn’t invited. He and her were friends and he went to her parties and her to his.
Secondly, black actors and actress sometimes have to to demeaning roles to get recognized but so do so white actors and acteress too. Julia Roberts played a hooker in pretty woman.Heath Ledger played a gay cowboy. Sometimes as people we miss out on shit because we let pride get in our way. Halle’s best roles is when she is not playing the perfect woman. That’s why it’s called acting.
Tyler Perry said as long as people want to see her, he will still play Madear. So, when folks stop paying the money, he’ll stop playing the role.
Comment by ErzulieRedEyes on 7 February 2010:
Just because people call themselves that word it doesn’t make it ok and it doesn’t make it any better.
Just like some black people that call themselves the N word, that’s silly.
Mulatto sounds weird and the real meaning behind the word comes from racist latinos, when they aren’t calling blacks that, the latinos are calling black people Chango(monkey.)
It shows that some people have been badly brainwashed and instead of seeing themselves as human individuals,
they see themselves as the labels that white people created to use against them.
Comment by Ichibod on 7 February 2010:
Fenway,
I didn’t see anything wrong with your posts. I have no idea what Bri problem is. She has issues with black men, period. She went off on Topdeck calling him “naive” and got mad when you said “REDICULOUS”. Then called someone your consigner as if you enlisted him to say anything. In typical fashion, delusional. She just thinks you’re cute and doesn’t understand (and obviously doesn’t like) how you can merely SEE another person points, but not necessarily agree with them. Just my take on it. Glad to have you here.
Many couples make sex tapes. My brother said he even made one with his wife. Kim K is not a slut. Ray J was the one who released their tape since he got dumped and he was working on a new album at the time.
I don’t get anything Bamabelle is saying. I understand it, but it makes no sense. It’s better to support a black person who sells out their integrity? Black men have been in dresses for far too long. MadTV even did a skit about it. That was hilarious!
The majority of people here are commenting on the Essence magazine article and using Reggie Bush, Halle Berry, and Kim Kardashian too make their points. No one here is taking shots at black men or black women specifically. Let’s stay on topic!
Just throwing this out there, Hattie McDaniel wasn’t allowed in the movie theater to see Gone With The Wind when it first came out.
Spike Lee has tons of freedom. Especially since he came out when no other black directors were in demand, except for Robert Townsend. I believe Spike is comfortable having Quentin Tarantino as a contemporary/rival than having to wear women’s clothing for cheap, played-out laughs. More power to Tyler Perry. He had a rough childhood and is now successful and an inspiration to many.
Everyone has the right to date whoever they want were they’re rich and famous or not.
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 7 February 2010:
Dear Bri
You do the same thing you accuse us of.
Look at your statement
“I’m also 20 with an advanced Engineering degree from an Ivy League College, I didn’t start a degree war with you but I’m not uneducated either, just an fyi, my name doesn’t end in -isha”
Even, if your name ended in “isha”, what is wrong with that???????????
Bama point taken. I skimmed over her biography. I was surprised she did so many roles. I thought she only did “Gone with the Wind”. She did more roles than a MAJORITY of black actresses currently in Hollywood today. This is extremely sad.
I think you addressed me and my statements about Shaemka with three kids by different daddies. I don’t know how it is “bigotry”. CONSIDERING, there are Shameka’s with kids by different men. That happens in the black community to often.
I can never understand some intellectual black women “elite”. It is almost like they want to hide “the lower socioeconomic side of the black community.
Now, if a white guy said “what I said”. Perhaps they would crucify him. I am just saying what people think their “head”.
I was watching the show “The Duggards”, they have 19 kids or so. The nation “loves them”. A black family with multiple children. It’s “oh” call the child welfare department and etc. Look at what they did the “Octomom”. If she was a white woman, they wouldn’t have been more sympathetic towards her.
You are on a slippery slope accusing black men of bigotry.
Also, there are no black kids named “Dequan, Shamika, and Temaka??? Show me the white men dating black women with kids by different men. Perhaps, I would feel different about my statements.
I stick by my statements!
I am not Tavis Smiley aka Travis “Liely”. Bill Cosby can say “harsh” things but when I say it. All hell break loose!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Your 20 years old and exceptionally smart. However, you have get out into the “real world”. Than, maybe your opinions might change. Not that I am trying to change them. I thought all your points were thought out perfectly.
Oh yea, never went to an Ivy League school and studied Criminology/Sociology at a state school. I just try to learn new things everyday.
Disclaimer
“The rights to Laurelton Queens comments are his own. It does not reflect the other black men on the board or the larger black community”.
Thank you
Comment by Bamabelle2k9 on 7 February 2010:
Didn’t you just contridict yourself by saying you understand what I’m saying but it makes no sense? huh? That statement made no sense. I support and understand what Tyler Perry is trying to do because him making Madear movies allows him freedom to make the kind of movies he wants instead of waiting on a white studio like Spike Lee. I don’t call that lack intergrity, I call that being smart. A lot of us at our jobs have to kiss ass of people we can’t stand in order to move up. Does that make that person have a lack of intergrity too?
That was my point about Hattie Mcdaniel she probably didn’t want to play a maid but she did in order to make it in Hollywoood. She was ridicule by black folks as well just like Tyler Perry is now but it allowed her to do other projects like having her own show before she died. All this BS about intergity and what you wouldn’t do, you don’t know what you’d do sometimes to make it.
I don’t know what you are reading but I’m reading men taking pot shots at women and women taking pot shots at men which is typical among us my point was you don’t see the white folks doing that but we feel the need to put each other down in order to make a point. Just like you did with my statement, if you don’t get it all you have to do is ask me to clarify my statement. Simple as that.
Comment by fenway2k on 7 February 2010:
@ Bri….
Lol! I guess you’re not happy now! May I offer you a mug of herbal tea? That coffee gets you too hyped!!
Struck a nerve, huh? You must have been looking in a mirror when you alluded to that.
It’s a problem now to have the ability to see and respect another person’s point of view without necessarily agreeing with them? Girl please! No one attacked me like you did. Don’t get mad because someone can call you on your Angry-Black-Woman- Walking-With-Big-Educated-Stick mentality.
I’m a patient man with an even greater knack for teaching so let’s get out of the post graduate stratosphere and relate at the elementary level for a moment shall we?
“…What I derived from your post is a need to have a counter-argument for a Black woman taking issue with the type of Black man who could say those types of things about Black women…”
“…The fact that you find it ridiculous that as a Black woman I attribute significance to the examples Black men set only proves my point further…”
It’s statements like these that reveal your bitterness and jaded mentality. Allow me to apologize for whoever (some Black man?)caused you to be this way.
Why is it so important for you to say Black this, or Black that? The FACT (hey, there’s that word you are so fond of) is that these statements are made by men and women, the color of their skin is irrelevant. I responded to you as a person with an opinion, nothing more. YOU interpolated Black, Black, Black and male and female into my comments, I didn’t.
“…The fact that Black women date out of their race shouldn’t be taken at face value either. There are plenty who do so for the wrong reasons, the difference between me and you is I have no problem admitting that…”
This is the FACT…whatever REASON they have for dating WHOEVER is their choice, their right, and their business. Once again, for you or anyone else in the peanut gallery to sit back, look at another person’s life, and interpret their choices as being a statement for ‘The Cause’ is RIDICULOUS!
“…But I guess if you belong to the school of thought that says a Black woman who wouldn’t date a cross-dressing drug addict (Rodman) but would date a successful man of any race is somehow a hypocrite then I guess this all Greek to you?….”
I never stated that a woman is a hypocrite because they would choose a successful White Man over Dennis Rodman. Where did you get that?
Who I called hypocrites were the women who criticized Black men for dating outside their race knowing full well that they would too if the “white” opportunity presented itself. You even admitted to this! If you want to criticize Black men for running to White women, just make sure that you don’t go running to white men, that was my point.
I mentioned Dennis Rodman only because he had a point in saying that it amazed him how some of those same Black women who refused to date him when he was broke were all over him when he got rich, then turned and criticized him for dating white women.
“… I made a factual statement about college attendance among Black adults and you felt burned…personal problem that has nothing to do with me…yes there are twice as many Black women who receive college educations than there are Black men…”
Did I not give you credit for this? Did I not acknowledge your statement as fact? Where is the denial you mentioned?
Here is what said, “…3)In ‘typical’ fashion you and every one like you (believe me you are not alone) want to put yourself up here and put Black men down there. All your stats are fine, even true but there is one fact you conveniently overlooked:
THEY DON’T TYPIFY BLACK MEN!…”
I give credit where its due. You brought up the education issue, I didn’t.
You seem to take offense at the fact that I am possibly your contemporary. That eats you up, so to make yourself sleep at night, you attempt to dehumanize me and disparage me by inferring that I am stupid, in denial, and gay.
I laugh because for all your Ivy-League (isn’t that code for White man’s?) education, you showed your young age by making this dialog personal by insulting me. In other words, you threw a temper tantrum…lol!
Once again, my point is the same (let’s keep this conversation in context)…who a person chooses to date for whatever reason is their choice, and is not a reflection of the Black Struggle, just a reflection of who they are as people.
I tell you what, remember the movie Barber Shop? Maybe you could take all the angry women on this post and start one of those morning exercise groups that Eve was in…lol!
BLACK MEN AINT SHIT….BLACK MEN AINT SHIT!!!
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 7 February 2010:
Dear Bama
So you would compromise your values and sell your ass simply to survive?
I don’t believe in “do anything” to survive. There is just some things that you must stand firmly on. I couldn’t see myself living in a shelter. I would rather go to prison. That is just how I am.
Tyler Perry hardly takes chances. He is a slave to his contract with a big movie conglomerate. It was contingent on him making “Madea” a franchise. He couldn’t stop wearing the dress if he wanted too. He has creative “control” contingent on making a profit.
Show me where he took a chance like Spike Lee did? There is no comparison here. Tyler Perry’s flaw is not having the “courage” to expand the characters of black people. Spike “grew” as a film maker. Tyler Perry so stubborn he lashes out at Spike Lee. The guy is a cotton picking jerk.
He either demonizes professional black women. He has old black women looking senile and stupid. The same goes for the elderly black characters. He has more sympathy for the “drug addict” black people and prostitutes. I figure because of his background he just gravitates to that.
I will never forget what some professional black women told me. They saw Madea goes to jail and was amazed at the “end of the movie”. Are you fucking serious? Marrying a prostitute. EVEN, if she did lock the girl up falsely. You are going to snitch on your long time fiancee. She was on her way to prison “anyway”. She was abused and all that but seriously. I thought about it like “yea” the movie went “left” at the end lol.
Tyler Perry is getting the money but he is not expanding. Meet the browns television show continues with the same buffoonery. Even damn “Family Matters” had more substance than this shit lol. This is how I feel. LOL
Watch shows like “Roc”, “Fresh Prince of Bel Air” “Cosby show” (no Bill Cosby fan but the show was good”. Even a “Different World”. Yea I said Fresh Prince of Bel Air. I remember hanging out an Ivy league college across my my college. The rich white kids would watch this show “endlessly”. If you notice, the last show to display “rich black children” was different strokes. Will Smith was able to transcend the color issue. I forgot it was even an all black show.
Tyler Perry has been successful in mainstreaming the black people that have “mental illnesses”. My uncle is like “Mr Brown” with the colorful clothes. I don’t think shit is funny all the time. My grandmother dress like “Madea” but she don’t act like a buffoon.
Where the white shows at showing “Trailer Park” white people other than on MTV, where you know it’s pure bullshit.
I remember when Roseanne had her own show. It was a little bit like “Tyler Perry” but from a poor white trash point of view. That “show” wasn’t buffoonery ALL THE TIME. Once it went into that direction it got canceled.
Tyler Perry should just say look ” I do comedy”. Instead he says he uses “comedy” to talk about “issues”. I don’t think so negro!
Comment by Ichibod on 7 February 2010:
“I don’t get anything Bamabelle is saying. I understand it, but it makes no sense.”
That does sound contradictory. What I meant was, I didn’t need you to clarify what you were saying, I think your reasoning and logic is off. Tyler Perry DOES what the system dictates by continuing stereotypes and coonery. Spike lee went broke by doing films like “Malcolm X”. Like white studios were really ready to back “School Days”, “Jungle Fever”, Mo Better Blues, or ” Do The Right Thing”. Selling out is what it is. A person sucking up to the boss the get ahead is usually just from the perspective of other people. Some people like to confuse kissing up with a good work ethic.
Pastor John Hagee once said, “Your repsonse is based on your conviction, not your circumstance.” That’s integrity.
You want to see some white people taking pot shots at each other, go the Ria’s blog on AfroRomance. They go at it worse than us here on IDC. Her topics are more varied as well. They also have more white people posting on white themed topics.
I wasn’t trying to put you down. Sorry your feelings are so easily hurt by differing opinions.
Comment by 12cuddlewith on 7 February 2010:
@bigeyes
your entitled to your opinion no doubt but for me these two women it has nothing to do with the color of their skin……it has to do with what they do and how they carry themselves. I mean i don’t know where you get your facts about Kim from….i mean i’m sorry but Superhead got herself to the top by giving blow jobs, knowing video taping herself with men to put on the net, expecting men to pay for this and that and support her not caring that they had wives….she phucked her way to the top and when finally men probably opened their eyes on to her game and yes she ran a good game, they bailed on her, how could she support herself…..eventually other video women came to light that were actually alot cuter than her and she out on her butt, not wanted for videos but blow jobs…i mean come on men want a good one lol and i am sure back then it was cool to them knowing they had a taste of superhead…but hello everyone has…..she used folks and threw their business out there to get a head….i don’t find that morally right…but hey thats the game i guess….and she can’t blame anyone for throwing her biz in public when she told the whole world….u don’t want folks to know shyt zip your damn lips (and i mean her mouth lol)…………………now if i had to compare her to another black woman out there the other black woman would be on top.
As far as Kim again, how you know she is a slut or is it the fact that yes she is a pretty woman…..you know women do hate others because they are very pretty…and kim is and so are you. If anyone makes a home video with the person they love we don’t expect it to be thrown out there in the internet world u know and i don’t think Kim expected that…..and i would be furious just as she was…..if u feel she was famous because of the tape so be it……but i am sure thats not what she wants to be remembered as….i mean you speak like u know everything inside and out about Kim……
For me if i had to break it down like this and i to choose between the two to learn some business tips on how to get to the top, i wouldn’t want to get any advice from Karrine about sleeping and phuckin to the top cause thats not how i want to get to the top by using and exploiting myself or others..how to live off of men to pay my bills cause i choose not to get a real job..i’d rather learn business sense from Kim…..now thats my opinion regardless of what anyone has to say……and no its not based on race…..cause if it were Oprah or Kim…i’d pick Oprah, lol its all about the character of the person…..what has Karrine given back to this world……atleast i know Kim has given back……
Comment by 12cuddlewith on 7 February 2010:
let me clarify this cause i was typing to fast: lol
NOT all women hate on a pretty woman……
Comment by bigeyes31 on 7 February 2010:
LOL this is certainly NOT about Kim K being “pretty” because Karrine is just as pretty to me,so “can” the implications.BTW thank you, I know this already,lol. YOU act as if YOU know all about Kim K, not Me.You keep using her personal background as if you her “personal” assistant or something. If you do something in private that you can’t do in public, then DON’T do it…bottom line. I don’t care one bit about Kim K’s background, who her daddy is/was, it’s PLENTY of good women and girls out on the streets doing questionable things with good backgrounds and well-off “daddys”. Since you say it’s NOT about race,name ONE black woman who has shot to A-list fame under the same conditions as Kim Kardashian. I, however CAN name some white ones….Paris Hilton, Pamela Anderson. Now I know how you are to defend them”oh they were famous before”,lol remember I’m dealing with LEVELS of fame and also INFAMY too. This is not a sorority so “hating” on the “pretty women” have nothing to with it. This is a blog. On that note, you contradict yourself,one minute you say that it’s about the person’s character(for you) but in the next you imply that I’m “hating” on her because she is “pretty” but I couldn’t POSSIBLY be going on character as well, again I emphasize this is NOT a sorority….your points are debatable.
Comment by 12cuddlewith on 7 February 2010:
I was making a general statement about the hating….i didn’t reference it in saying specifically you were and if it came across that way it wasn’t meant to be……and YES it is a blog….i think i am quite aware of it. lol You are entitled to your opinion just like i am….But don’t assume that i am going to defend pamela or paris…..we already know what paris is all about….and in my opinion she is at a different level then Kim. My issue is there is somewhat of a difference of between the two because again Kim didn’t sleep her way to where she is….her video was that of a private moment with her boyfriend….whereas Karrin slept with rich men, lived off of men and then exposed all the men who looked out for her and threw their dirt out there…..and you find that ok? Don’t get me wrong all these men i hold just as accountable as her and they knew better and they could of said no. maybe you don’t cause you called them both sluts, but what i really wanted to know is WHY you think Kim is a slut…..that was really my ? but yeah i got off the track lol
Comment by bigeyes31 on 7 February 2010:
yeah I don’t think bad about any of them really, I just like making points…sometimes I like being “messy” that’s what we call it in Alabama,lol. I don’t think she is a slut, I think they (paris, pamela, kim and karrine did some slutty things but I still like to watch them as celebrities,lol. I’m addicted to the “glam” of it all just the same,lol.
Comment by 12cuddlewith on 7 February 2010:
Well i am sure we have all done stuff in our personal lives that others might think are a lil slutty hahaha. We are all human and we all make mistakes…..my life goes on and i am sure with you too in regards to the women. I personally don’t think Karrin made good choices, those were choices she made back then i guess as some say to survive but her survival ideas weren’t gonna last forever and unfortunately she is considered a slut and one to stay away from and thats sad. i mean i guess i guess i want positive things said about me when i die,and what can she have on her tomb stone lol a penis and the words RIP superhead lol ok yeah i had to go there. as far as pamela goes, yeah she did the whole playboy thing and that show but i don’t sit and look at her like omg i wanna be her, i want my real boobs and shape. lol and Paris, yeah she should be grown enough to know its not ok to sound dumber than a box of rocks. lol Now she i will call a slut hahahahaha or done slutty things.
Comment by Bamabelle2k9 on 7 February 2010:
@Ichibod Trust me I’m not sitting here with a bag of tissues crying in my beer I just felt the need to set you straight. Tell me the last time Spike Lee made a movie that made over $50 million in the last 10 years? I’ll wait. Tyler Perry is smart. He knew exactly what to do and now he owns his own studio, producing his own movies and his own television shows. My thing is as long as the public is going to buy the tickets, he is going to keep wearing the dresses.
Comment by Bamabelle2k9 on 7 February 2010:
I have a question,as black folks have we lost our sense of humor? So can’t laugh at ourselves any more? I like Madear and I think the character is funny but I guess some of us lost our sense of humor. I find it interesting Queen that you have no problem with some woman a black woman at that profitting from giving black men sex and then writing a tell all about it, but have a problem with a brotha making a living wearing dresses in order to make an HONEST living. Can you say double standard? It’s ok to be a ho,right?
Comment by fenway2k on 7 February 2010:
Hey, ho’s need love too…lol!
Comment by Ichibod on 8 February 2010:
Spike Lee’s “Inside man” made $88 million in 2006, but that’s beside the point. Thanks for waiting, it only took me a fews seconds to Google. Who cares about how much money a movie makes. That’s what has more movie aficionados gravitating toward independant films rather thtn major studio releases. People focus more on what pays rather than the art form itself. I just don’t respect a person who reinforces stereotypes. That’s why I can’t stand Rap and R&B nowadays. Spike Lee presents expositions on black stereotypes in just about every film of his, begging questions as to why. Spike came at time when Black directors were virtually none existent and the ONE that did exist only did hilarious, quasi-coon comedy (gotta love ‘Hollywood Shuffle’). “40 Acres and a Mule” is his studio and production company, founded long before Perry studio. Just go ahead and get your box of tissues. Dave Chappelle walked away from $50 million because people have a sense of humor, but have shown that they aren’t sure what they really should be laughing at and why. Smart brotha!
We need to quit showing our young black boys how to wear women’s clothing immediately.
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 8 February 2010:
Dear Bama
I think that is a straw man argument. I am debating the merits of Tyler Perry’s work. It almost like you are saying “well” let black people be coons. The “brother” would be out stealing and robbing if he didn’t dress up in drag and do movies.
Give me a break.
Who says indirect prostitution by black women and books is okay. I said she is a “survivor” considering the tough background she came from. She really has no influence on anything. Black women denounce her. Karrine is not a role modeel. Go look at the colleges she speaks too. They boo her off stage.
Tyler “Cherry” is praised for what exactly? Portraying black people are struggling, senile, and etc. He has enough money to “branch out”. He doesn’t hire writers that “step out of the box”. The Precious “movie” was a decent movie. I don’t think a movie like this would have been done without the help of Tyler Perry and Oprah. HOWEVER, they ran away when the critics was like who this “fat sloppy dark black woman”? They white audience sure didn’t see this movie. Tyler “Cherry” can put Precious in his next movie. I want to see that.
Let me point out another movie. What was it “My three daughters”. Some shit like that. Gabrielle Union looks cold and out of touch because she don’t want to be with a man with 3 kids. The guy gets “upset about it”. Oh yea, he left out he went to prison for rape with a white girl. He said ‘he ain’t do it” but you are in Georgia, I assume. You fucking a white girl in racist Georgia???? You ain’t bother telling her that until your baby mother told on you. Oh yea, they fall in love at the end of the movie. Holy shit!
Tyler “Cherry” made a left turn off a CLIFF.
C’mon son
Comment by Bamababe2k9 on 8 February 2010:
Gentleman, I think a lot of this is you being uncomfortable with the sexuality of a black man dressing in drag. Eddie Murphy did it, Martin Lawerence did it, Jamie Foxx did it and all of them are black and successful and to my knowledge hetersexual. Have either of you seen the show my name is Earl? The show is off the air now but basically the show was about this white trash guy who wins 100k who goes around trying to make up for all the bad things he did. The show consented of his dumb brother, his white trash ex wife who got pregnant by other men and was married to a brotha who was the smartest character on the show. I guess my point is that wasn’t the best representation of white people I’ve ever seen but you didn’t hear white folks complain about it. My thing why can’t we be more supportive? So, it’s not your cup of tea but a lot people relate to these movies and they do send a positive message. Fellows, I got news for you black folks aren’t perfect. I remember when the Color Purple was put down by a lot of black men because it put them in a bad light which I think hurt the movie and prevented it from winning an Oscar which it deserve. We hurt ourselves sometimes by being petty. This man did all this stuff so he can be his own boss and whether you like it or not, he has succeeded.
Comment by 12cuddlewith on 8 February 2010:
OMG My name is Earl is funny as hell and i just started watching now…yeah a lil late but i don’t see anything wrong with it, yeah there folks in the trailer parks….its all done in good humor. It’s a comedy and if i am good in my own skin stuff like that won’t bother me because it doesn’t reflect my life. I personally don’t find nothing wrong with Tyler Perry’s movies, there is always a messaage of some sort. Tyler is playing a character thats it. A character only it doesn’t reflect the whole black community and i think if the black community had a problem with the movies they wouldn’t continue going or or buying the movies. It is what it is….if it bothers some then i guess it do, if white folks aren’t going to make fun of themselves then shyt black folks do. “shrugs”
Comment by Sanekewe on 9 February 2010:
Hey people what is all the fuss…!! All people have a right to choose who they want to be in a relationship with…Is it realy anybodies…BUSINESS..!
Stop judging and leave me alone….!I am white and date black men…so what. I dont seem to have a problem when African american women date white men.
Some of my best friends are Latina and they date white men…!!
It is comments like these that keep us all at each others THROATS…all the time….!!
Can we all just get along….if you and I both cut ourselves the blood will always be red…!!
We are all the same race…THE HUMAN RACE…!!!
Comment by godiva61 on 12 February 2010:
@Ichibod,
Ichi is Japanese for the number 1, isn’t it?? I’m thinking about the comment referring to your name..
Well, Ich btween being sick and blizzared in at work for the last 4days, I never got the chance to buy the magazine, so I could read the article.
I will comment on the so called controversy. First off, Reggie is a black man that’s in love/relationship, so why not? Just because his relationship is not with a black woman, is no ground’s to omit Reggie and there is definitely no moral, or itelligent reason to refer to him as a white supremacist, that was foul.
What bother’s me personally is when I hear of the negative comment’s, it somehow turn’s into a ENTIRE black woman issue and James seems to enjoy bringing these type of articles to this site. Contrary to popular belief, we are INDIVIDUALS and we don’t ALL have the same thought, ideas, expectations or belief’s!!!
I think perhaps, part of the controversy is because of what Reggie has been alleged to have said about black women. I won’t comment on that because as far as I’m concerned, I didn’t hear him say it, so it’s a rumor in my eyesight. Maybe he did, but maybe he didn’t. If you add this allegation into the equation, then the fire start’s.
From a marketing point of view only, perhaps Reggie was not the best choice, and I stress, MARKETING!!
Maybe LaDainian Tomlison, would have been the better choice if you were going for the athlete angle. Somehow I have to believe that no matter who was on the cover someone, would have complained. You can’t please everyone!
I personally would have like to seen someone other than an single athlete on the cover, I would have preferred someone that is married. Bill Cosby and Camille, Colin Powell and Alma, just to name a couple.
I too am curious as to how this would have played out if Halle had been the choice?? I like Halle but she is not the epitomy of a black woman.
What if Essence had put a Robert DeNiro or his wife, Grace on the cover, or the former Secetary of Defense, William Cohen or his wife Janet? Something to think about????????
godiva
Comment by tatted2death on 13 February 2010:
Wow…bamababe…..I loved your comment
“We hurt ourselves sometimes by being petty.”
That speaks volumes to why alot of things go wrong in the world…..in SOOOOO many different situations.
Peace and Blessings
tatted2death
Comment by tatted2death on 13 February 2010:
I must also say I loved neverdun17 comments……made the most sense to me….love yourself as you are….NATURALLY.
But as for this topic as a whole I must say it is just plain stupid….If Reggie was dating say a “light-skinned” sista, people STILL would have had something to say. Way too many people are “color-struck” in this day and age and that is just SAD. I don’t want to hear anything about BLACK nationalism or anything of the like until THAT madness can be done away with…..NOT LIKELY, IT SEEMS.
Peace
Comment by Bamababe2k9 on 13 February 2010:
@tatted2death Thank you for the comments. Sometimes as black folks we need to just get over ourselves and stop trying to make every situation about us. What Tyler Perry is doing has put a lot of black actors and acteress to work and that’s should be more important then whether or not he wears a dress.
@12cuddlewith My Name is Earl is actually pretty funny at times and that’s my point, we act like at times we can’t even laugh at each other or with each other any more.
Comment by neverdun17 on 13 February 2010:
@tatted2death
Thank you for your feedback. You’re the first to respond to what I had to say. I thought that either no one read what I had to say or I was just so far off that everyone felt it wasn’t even worth responding to
Comment by Ichibod on 13 February 2010:
Adolf Hitler put a lot of Germans to work. It led to the extermination of millions of Jews, but maybe if he wore a dress it wouldn’t have so bad.
Comment by Bamababe2k9 on 13 February 2010:
Ichibod comparing Tyler to Hitler is just plain stupid. The man wears a dress, so the F what? Like I said I bet a lot of this has to do with you being uncomfortable seeing a black man in drag though other black actors have done it. You are afraid that him wearing a dress will make men like you look like a sissy.
Comment by TYRANT on 13 February 2010:
At first I was going to pass this topic up, but I’ve decided to allow myself to get draggged in and post my thoughts on the subject.
As a black man, I do NOT think Reggie Bush was the right choice for the cover of Essence Magazine, because he’s involved with Kim Kardashian-a non black woman. When I picked up the magazine-yes I read Essence-I wanted to hear how the black men pictured felt about their relationships with black women, and to be honest, I just don’t think I got enough of that.
As to the whole issue of being a white supremacist, I don’t believe Reggie Bush is a white supremacist, because he hasn’t only dated non black women like say…Tiger Woods, who’s referred to himself as anything but BLACK. When he announced to the world that he’s CALABLASIAN, the owners of both Webster and Oxford dictionaries were calling each other and asking WTF is he talking about. LOL
My definition of a white supremacist is a black woman/man who uplifts every race of man/woman but BLACK men/women, and promote them as “superior” men/women. As if that’s not enough they’ll give you a gazillion reasons WHY they’d never date another BLACK man/woman. A perfect candidate for the white supremacist title would be Evia-yes I’ve read her blog-and the woman is without a doubt, a white supremacist.
Comment by wonka on 21 February 2010:
Thank you sooooo much TYRANT,I’ve said this so many
times,tiger woods is a disgrace to himself and his
race,he’s F—ing BLACK,bottomline.The guy wants to be everything in the book besides what he is A BLACK
MAN!!!!,ok.Evidentally,now he’s a buddhist,he’s a
true scumbag,I have NO RESPECT for him.I’ll tell you somethingelse let him keep denying his race and
sombody someday is truely going to put him in his
place,I’m telling you!!.I’ve heard people say”Oh well tiger is mixed”his mom’s asian ok that’s evident-fine his father is black,however I’ve also
heard that his father is bi-racial himself,yeah ok.
So why in the hell did tiger come out looking black
it’s funny how his mom is asian,the father is so-
called bi-racial,but,the child(tiger)was born
looking BLACK,HMMMMMMMMMM!!! interesting.GIVE ME A
FREAKIN’ BREAK!!.Who does tiger think he’s kidding,
hey tiger your a disgrace,a wannabe,and I’ll tell
you somethingelse,YOUR BLACK,YOUR BLACK,YOUR BLACK!
Comment by MzBrOwNSuGaR on 23 February 2010:
The one thing I have noticed as I have read through different topics and posts here, as well as other sites, is never do I see the white men down-grade and disrespect white women the way I see these black men doing. I find it very sad that this is what we have come to. It’s the same feeling I remember having when I first tried to figure out when and why, and at what point our young black men, and some women, decided they would join gangs and gun each down. The hatred within the black race and the need to tear each other down. To get on a mixed forum like this, and see black men use terms like wide noses, kinky/nappy hair, big lips.
It’s a crying shame.
neverdun17
Comment by MzBrOwNSuGaR on 23 February 2010:
To neverdun17 :
Sorry, I didn’t mean to put your nic at the end of that. I had intended to respond to your post but decided not to on that, but forgot to take your name off.
I felt like your post, at least part of it, was very supportive of black women and it was refreshing to see. The last part I thought was a polite slap in the face, but maybe I read it wrong.
Yes we perm our hair, wear braids, some wigs, some weaves, some curly etc. That has nothing to do with us not loving who we are. Eventhough you seemed to doubt it, making it more easy to manage is one of the reasons. But for the most part, it’s a female thing. The wearing different styles, trying new looks, even different hair colors. I don’t know if you are aware of it or not, but black women are not exclusive in this, and the hair you see on white women and other women, is not all nature.
I tip my hat to my fellow sisters, who I know for a fact are indeed confident with themselves and do in deed feel beautiful. Even when our OWN men say some of the things they have said here.
Comment by mecca77 on 23 February 2010:
wow… you people need to get laid.. so do i but anywho. wonka… tiger is black. i do not care what anyone says if you have according to the united states if you have 1/3 black blood. your considered. negro. african american . black. not half. not just a little bit of white. black get the facts. true wonka i agree with you. but only in america right? bur people been marry interacially for years who cares i have enough on my plate right now. than to worry who marrying what race. big f..king deal. really . i do not know what essence is talking about it is run by the johnson family. need i say more. yeah i said it!!.. but all and all tiger woods do suck!! for what he did he knows exactly what he was doing. during his so-called rehearsed speech. he did admit one thing. and i quote. “I thought i can get away with it”. well shiver me timbers!!!.. duh you did. but you got caught. men fail to realize. with technology . why do they think they are exempt? hey you know when your in the spot light. they are watching every move. its frustrating . if your so sensitive to this shit.. why do it? that what i want to know. then he rants.everyone is in my business. well you made it everyone business. when you got caught!!!. you have been creeping anyway dude. not me judging . it is, what it is.
Comment by mecca77 on 23 February 2010:
@tattedtodeath.. your funny.. tyler perry has put a lot of our sisters and brothers to work thank good. because. i was like damn where are all the black people at. well as you know by the year i would say i am just guessing.l 2020 america will be east indians and hispanic . now not saying that’s a bad thing. well face it everytime i call to get customer service. it’s always bombay tech support. and face it where are we in this scenario. your going to look around one day and say hey!!.. where the black people at!! you know how we roll , when we are at one of the foo foo. she , she functions nothing european and no blacks . see one brother or sister. we say to ourselves. whew!!.. a black person. come on i am not the only one so stop making me feel like it… yeah we do have laugh sometimes.
its good for the soul.
Comment by Bri on 25 February 2010:
At Laurelton Queens…I did not do the same thing I accused you of. I simply told you a bit about my background because you made some extremely crass and rude generalizations about Black women only…generalizations you are not making about women of other races which is why I felt necessary to bring it to your attention that your ignorant opinion is not a fact and Black women like myself prove just that. Your statements about pregnancy in Black communities and women with children by different men happening “too often” in Black communities is not true…a lot of statistics concerning parenthood are similar across different minority groups and damn near identical in Black and Latino communities…you however, as a Black man choose to portray women of your own race differently than you do women of other races because you are ignorant. You waste your time filling this forum with negative stereotypes about Black women that actually hold true for women from every background, race, and economic status! And all the issues I mentioned that effect Black communities is the very exact and equal opposite of what you are accusing me of. How could I be hiding from “the lower socioeconomic side of the black community” when I mentioned several familial issues to which many Black families are predisposed as a direct result of the disproportionate number of Black people who live on the wrong side of the economic gap in America? The “lower socioeconomic side of the black community” is who I am speaking on behalf of which is why a Black man like the one I was originally speaking with comes across as extremely stupid to me when he puts forth that it is RIDICULOUS to assume he can impact our race struggle. I was drawing attention to how foolish it is for someone with two degrees to say he can’t impact our race struggle…..that’s who you should be addressing! And as a Black woman who went to a good school but now works in my community any Black person who says it’s ridiculous to assume they can impact our race struggle is an idiot. And it’s no secret that a lot of interracial relationships are the result of that type of thinking, i.e. a disconnect with one’s own race and desperate attempt to disassociate from “the lower socioeconomic side” your race because of the negative stereotypes that plague those individuals. Yet, you come to a forum and broadcast those very same stereotypes and then assume everyone feels as negatively as you do about Black women. No you are not saying what people think in their head…believe it or not there are actually Black people in this world who don’t go around spewing derogatory stereotypes about their own race on the worldwide web….I can’t believe you think it’s normal to do so yourself.
Comment by Bri on 25 February 2010:
Fenway, I addressed your cosigner as your cosigner because his comments were too ignorant to deserve a direct response. I didn’t feel I should have to explain to a Black man who says Black women are named Shameka and have multiple children by multiple men why he was stupid. He didn’t deserve the time of day. Referring to him as your girlfriend was sarcasm genius because you’re here trying to make me stop talking by calling my honesty bitterness and he’s here piggy-backing off of your comments…..that’s why I said you should look at how what you say comes across because a Black female basher is playing for your team and if that’s not how you view yourself then you should examine why your commentary appeals to someone who does. How is it bitter to take issue with a Black man who stereotypes Black women negatively? How is it jaded to have a problem with a Black man who is a bad example and representation for/of his own race? I’m bitter because I think a Black man who refers to Black women as fat overeaters with bad attitudes and nappy hair is out of line? Really? As a Black woman I’m the one with the problem? Have you read none of the other posts in this forum? No one is responding to the dumbasses making posts of that nature…they’re just responding to the Black women who express their distaste with those posts. It it not ridiculous for me to criticize ways of thought that effect my community negatively….and newsflash, the mentality from a Black man that has only negative things to say about Black women, the majority of them not true or not exclusive to Black women, affects Black women negatively. It is not ridiculous for me to bring these issues to light. No one criticized Black men who are in interracial relationships..I criticized Black men who degrade Black women, Black men who have a disconnect from their own communities and Black men who put women of other races on a pedestal….all forms of thought that usually go hand in hand with interracial dating. I didn’t say every Black man belonged to that category but some do and furthermore are so bold as to articulate their way of thoughts in the comments above. I pointed out that as long as this very forum is overrun with negative statements about Black women coming from Black men then it is ridiculous to continue generalizing positively about all interracial daters and endorsing Black men who think its okay to flock to their keyboards and call Black women nappy and unattractive and refer to us as being mothers of multiple bastard children. If you think it’s normal to condone that type of commentary something is seriously wrong with you. And it is no secret that this negative commentary is going in one direction…from Black men about Black women. There are no Black women in this forum posting lists of all the reason Black men are inferior to men of other races which is why I pointed out the differences in rates of college attendance. My point was that there are more Black women who as a direct result of being college educated…either attend school or work in more diverse environments than the communities where they may have spent most of their childhood lives so the odds of a Black woman meeting a successful man of another race are extremely higher than meeting a brokedown Rodman type…something you don’t consider when you look at interracial dating trends of Black men versus Black women. Laurelton Queens for example says he did not go to school….but he is still here demonstrating his contempt for Black women…..a Black man like him who has issues with Black women versus a Black woman like myself in an environment where I am one of a few Black females surrounded by men of every race and economic status…should both of us happen to be in interracial relationships it would be for very different reasons…his being his personal holdups with Black women versus mine being in an environment where there are hardly any Black men. I also never expressed my dating preferences so I never admitted to dating anyone of any specific race anywhere in my statements. And your statement about Dennis Rodman was also a narrow-minded view of Black men in that industry period. I pointed out that it was silly of you to even open pandora’s box by using a pro-athlete as an example because there are more Black men who come into fame in sports or music who are in interracial relationships with women who would not have given them the time of day when they were broke….there are few examples of that scenario in reverse….furthermore most of these men were in relationships with Black women until they became famous…so using Rodman as an example only drew attention to all his peers, many of whom prove my point. And even Rodman’s statements are stupid….I’m sure there were plenty of Asian, White and Hispanic women who were not interested in him when he was a loser but wanted to be his groupies when he was accompllished, that’s not specific to Black women…being attracted to a wealthy man because of his wealth is not unique to Black women…goldiggers come in all colors, Rodman CHOSE to emphasize that as a trait of Black women in typical Black-male-degrading-Black-female fashion. Have you seen his wife anyway? You really think she was a good samaritan for hooking up with Rodman when he was nothing? No! She’s a user just like him and has had countless extramarital affairs..Rodman’s relationship was just an example of one loser hooking up with another…not a White woman dating a Black guy despite the fact he wears dresses and abuses drugs because she’s a saint. And since when is going to a school that’s predominantly White a bad thing? Last time I checked it won a Black man the White house. You think attending Ivy-League schools is not part of putting a Black foot in the door to be equally successful in industries that are dominated by Whites? Really, like as a Black woman going to an Ivy-League school is not positive for minorities? You are not my contemporary…my contemporary is a Black male who understands that his academic, economic or career progress is something that can be used to benefit his race as a whole….that’s a principle by which I live my entire life…I went to school to better serve my community, not to run away from it…I would never put forth a statement so idiotic such as “it is RIDICULOUS to assume I impact the Black race struggle”…you typify the very type of Black man I was referring to….the type who has convinced himself he has no part to play in the Black community and who could care less about the issues that still effect us as a people and you are also proving that your type of thinking and interracial dating go hand in hand which is what I said from the jump.
Comment by Bri on 25 February 2010:
Ichibod, no one went off on Topdeck…I called her naive because she is a White woman who has zero comprehension for any experience but her White cultural experience. Her exact words were that we could “stand to learn a lesson” from the examples of interracial dating afforded us…..however, she conveniently ignored all the derogatory commentary from Black men about Black women. There are plenty of women who are in interracial relationships with Black men who ignore how those same Black men degrade Black women and fail to make the connection between the fact that a Black man who degrades Black women and only dates women who are not Black is not someone we should seek to imitate and furthermore that his relationship is a manifestation of his negative feelings towards Black women. Topdeck also asked me why I was “making some issues more important than others” That’s my point….as a Black woman advocating for my own race when I live in a country that serves her race is somehow making some issues more important than others? Only a White person with an extremely narrow-minded view of the world could pose a question like that. As a minority speaking up for my own community is not making some issues more important than others it’s necessary. If anything I should be asking her as a White woman why society continues to treat Whites with more importance than they do other races. Her comments sound similar to those of White people who said Blacks were racist because 96% of Blacks voted for Barack. The second a Black person is pro-themselves Whites cry making or issues more important than others despite the fact that we live in a country that is pro-the White agenda…that’s why Topdeck is naive. Users such a Kalin littered this forum with negative generalizations about Black women…you seriously think if someone like him was in a relationship with a White woman she would bother to know that her boyfriend puts forth such negative comments about women of his own race…no, she would just run to her computer and instead tell everyone else that they could stand to learn lessons from men like him because her experience is the White cultural experience without an iota of understanding for anything but. I don’t expect a White woman to get that their are Black men who refer to Black women as nappy and unattractive or talk about how they will not date brown- or dark-skinned Black women. Women of other races just date Black men without the slightest hint of the way those same Black men treat us. She’s here endorsing all interracial relationships despite the fact that this forum has plenty of examples of Black men who are only in interracial relationships because of the way they stereotype women from their own communities. She even goes so far as to praise those men. I didn’t imply Fenway knew his cosigner, I referred to him that way because of my refusal to directly address Mr. Queens stupid remarks and to bring it to Fenway’s attention that Black men like Mr. Queens were piggy-backing off of his comments. I didn’t realize you interpreted everything so literally. And no I do not think a bald man with an oblong milk dud head and weird expression on his face is cute…perhaps you’re the one who’s delusional.
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 25 February 2010:
Dear Bri
I spew derogatory statements about my own race?
You said this….
“Your statements about pregnancy in Black communities and women with children by different men happening “too often” in Black communities is not true…a lot of statistics concerning parenthood are similar across different minority groups and damn near identical in Black and Latino communities…you however, as a Black man choose to portray women of your own race differently than you do women of other races because you are ignorant. You waste your time filling this forum with negative stereotypes about Black women that actually hold true for women from every background, race, and economic status! And all the issues I mentioned that effect Black communities is the very exact and equal opposite of what you are accusing me of. How could I be hiding from “the lower socioeconomic side of the black community” when I mentioned several familial issues to which many Black families are predisposed as a direct result of the disproportionate number of Black people who live on the wrong side of the economic gap in America?”
Portray black women how? They have the highest rates of incarceration, stds, out of wedlock children. I am sorry to say this is the reality we live in. What negative stereotypes are you upset about?
Uh, you are hiding from the lower economic side of the black community because you say I am stereotyping. These issues I have mentioned don’t happen in the black community? Perhaps, I am wrong since I was raised in the black community NAPPY HEAD!
You corner yourself in the last part of your paragraph…
“Black families are predisposed as a direct result of the disproportionate number of Black people who live on the wrong side of the economic gap in America?”
WHAT IN “SAM HILL” ARE YOU EVEN SAYING?
You also said this drivel
” a Black man like the one I was originally speaking with comes across as extremely stupid to me when he puts forth that it is RIDICULOUS to assume he can impact our race struggle. I was drawing attention to how foolish it is for someone with two degrees to say he can’t impact our race struggle…..that’s who you should be addressing! ”
I got two degrees. Yea, I can impact the race struggle by telling Negros stay in school. Try to NOT commit crimes. For god’s sake don’t get a felony. What else do you propose for me to do? You want me to hold their hands too. I can type up their resume.
There is something called personal responsibility. That is something sellout black women haven’t learned yet. They rather blame everyone but themselves for their “fuck ups”.
When I was fucked up in my youth. Never listened to my dad and mom. I ended up in jail as a teen. Who can I blame for that? I can only blame myself. I am not one of these pampered “negros” that see a couple Feed the children commercials and start pointing fingers at people that are “well off”.
You can avoid out of wedlock children, STDS and incarceration. It is avoidable.
You can never question me at all. I take care of my woman (who is black). We live well. I strive to be the best at what I do in 2 jobs. I will be a teacher next year. I always improving myself.
These cotton picking Negros think complaining is going to get somewhere in life.
I learned a long time ago. There are black men that talk about shit. Than, there are those who “actually” make it happen.
I ain’t apologizing for shit I say about black women. I might do a Tiger Wood’s press conference telling black women, you fucked up. Dating, how you treat black men. All that shit is your fault and leave the podium and hug my dear old mother.
Just because you gossip with your friends at “Beauty School” does not make you an intellectual.
Look for that “Sellout Street Medicine”. COMING SOON.
Some of these black women catching the “Tatt” bitchassness flu. I got a treatment for them.
Comment by Just Some Black Guy on 3 March 2010:
Am I the ONLY one who sees where Bri is coming from? Where she’s going?
As a result of generations upon generations of African-Americans in this country being indoctrinated in all kinds of ways for 400+ years, who’s to say that Black men dating White women ISN’T indicative of some deeper psychological issue?
It might not be politically correct to say, but it’s CERTAINLY a valid point.
The thing to remember here is that Black men, EN MASSE, overwhelmingly date, prefer and marry Black women. With that being said, you’re going to have Black men who are as messed up as bri says. Men who DO feel that Black women are somehow “less than” and this becomes a problem if more Black men adhere to that mentality.
But, THOSE guys are rare anamolies …and do not represent a good majority of BM. They don’t even represent a good majority of the BM who date out.
I’m a Black man who prefers Black women, which is probably why it’s my first post on this site …and I care deeply about our community. VERY deeply. So I guess I can empathize with bri’s position.
She’s just concerned is all.
Comment by Bri on 8 March 2010:
Laurelton, No one is hiding from the lower socioeconomic side of the Black community you loser. I mentioned several of the issues that effect the lower socioeconomic side of the Black community but unlike you I did not make them an innate characteristic of being Black I connected them to the environments in which these individuals live. If there were just as many Whites economically disadvantaged as Blacks then you would see the same incidences occurring in their communities at the same rates. You quote statistics about Black women as though they are characteristics of being Black instead of characteristics of being poor or uneducated….it just so happens that in this country the number of individuals that are poor and uneducated are majority Black. That’s what it means to be predisposed to the “incarceration, stds, out of wedlock children” to which you refer. Black people who belong to middle of upper class communities do not exhibit the same rates of drug abuse, unemployment, or out of wedlock children as do those who live in economically challenged environments…i.e. all the things you mention are not examples of Blackness they are examples of poverty. That’s why they also ring true for the majority of individuals who are not Black who also share these living environments with Blacks. You are a pathetic waste of space to try to portray Black women as being a certain way because they are Black instead of because they are poor. You are choosing to demonize your own race….is White America going to send you a check in the mail after you’re done trying to single-handedly denigrate Blacks? You’re working for them overtime with the statements you’ve made. You think if every woman with a child out of wedlock went to a high school that wasn’t below par and attended college she would still be that same person? No, she would be a professional, probably not have children out of wedlock and experience the lifestyle that the middle and upper class takes for granted. Her lifestyle is the result of a lack of equal opportunity afforded to low income individuals, not a result of being Black. It’s just gotten to the point that because so many Blacks live below poverty society as a whole has come to associate that lifestyle with being Black….and as a Black man you sound extremely stupid agreeing with this biased view of your own race. If Black children from the hood switched place with privileged White children then Black children would achieve the same things that privileged White children do because they have the resources. And if as a Black man your approach to ways in which you can impact your own community is nothing more than sarcasm then you are only proving my point. I mentioned that Black men who have a disconnect from their community are part of the reason Black communities fail. Black communities also have the highest rates of single motherhood—Black communities are void of leaders and fathers. If you want to stereotype Black women you should give equal attention to the trends among Black men from these same communities. The NAACP has to have a seminars to teach Black men how to be fathers…it’s something even Obama took time to address, and you think the state of economically disadvantaged Black communities has nothing to do with that. When you do have a Black man who has the potential to help his own community his response it that it is ridiculous to do so. Personal responsibility can only get you so far….at some point Blacks who do have the resources to do so have to start providing opportunities for people from their own communities to enjoy the same success they do and get out. Every poor Black kid will not receive a scholarship or a grant, affirmative action only covers some of us….so what happens to the remainder who have the same aspirations and dreams of the middle and upper class but can’t afford access to them? No one said that the social issues that effect Blacks are not avoidable but their prevalence has everything to do with lack of money, opportunity and resources. Unemployment rates are always highest in inner cities, not because the people there are Black Einstein but because there are not as many businesses at which these individuals can seek jobs. Blacks are not responsible for the lack of good schools in their neighborhoods their economic disparity is and their lack of opportunities starts of vicious cycle of lack of achievement. You’re talking to a Black woman who works extensively in my community, someone who’s watched her parents and grandparents work in Black communities so your baseless statements about complaining and doing nothing are very far off. But talking to you is pointless because you are too ignorant for your own good, you’ve referred to me as “nappy head”…”sellout black woman”….”cotton picking Negro”….”black women catching the “Tatt” bitchassness flu” and stereotypes like ‘Beauty School” and then say “I ain’t apologizing for shit I say about black women.” I really don’t have to do much to prove your are a fool….you’re more than willing to prove it yourself with your remarks. Go watch reruns of Living Color or whatever you do to get more material for your degradation of the Black community routine. Next time I’m going to need you to come with more than my name is Laquita, my children have 4 different daddies and I suppose now I’m a crackhead too? You are a hot mess…
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 8 March 2010:
Dear Bri
I just caught some of the “book” you wrote on here. First, you rail off everything that is affecting the black community. But I am “somehow” to blame for the perception that “all black women” are poor with kids. You can blame society for that. My cousin’s wife went to the doctor’s office with their son. The nurse said “oh its okay, you are not the only one without the father around”. Needless to say, she was “upset” about that. This is the perception of society.
You said this
“You quote statistics about Black women as though they are characteristics of being Black instead of characteristics of being poor or uneducated….it just so happens that in this country the number of individuals that are poor and uneducated are majority Black.”
Um, you can’t argue with numbers. So what is your problem with me saying the statistics? Actually, “Latin immigrants” have a high poverty rate. You mentioned characteristics of the poor and uneducated. What are those characteristics that you are offended by?
“Black people who belong to middle of upper class communities do not exhibit the same rates of drug abuse, unemployment, or out of wedlock children as do those who live in economically challenged environments…i.e. all the things you mention are not examples of Blackness they are examples of poverty. That’s why they also ring true for the majority of individuals who are not Black who also share these living environments with Blacks. You are a pathetic waste of space to try to portray Black women as being a certain way because they are Black instead of because they are poor.”
I am middle class so why would I say all black women suffer from poverty. However, the “out wedlock” birth rate is high among “middle class black women”. The Std rates is high as well “across” all classes of black women. We can always research it. Again, your whole tirade is confusing. You admit “there are” poor black women”. But seem upset that I called “all black women” poor. You need to show me where I said that. Also, you just said a “MAJORITY” of black people are poor and uneducated. You kind of “cornered” yourself. I guess it is okay “when you say it”.
You also said this
“Black communities also have the highest rates of single motherhood—Black communities are void of leaders and fathers. If you want to stereotype Black women you should give equal attention to the trends among Black men from these same communities. The NAACP has to have a seminars to teach Black men how to be fathers…it’s something even Obama took time to address, and you think the state of economically disadvantaged Black communities has nothing to do with that.”
Right, so what was I lying about? By your own admission, black women from all social classes are having some dating problems. Perhaps, you just dislike me. I really don’t know who you are, to call you names. I will address your points.
Perhaps, they should have seminars for black women to pick the right men to “father” their children. It is always easy to “fall into” the blame black men for “everything doctrine”. Black women have more power than you think. You can close your legs, I can’t fuck you and make you “prego” without your permission. You can ‘weed” out the men “that do not stick around for your child”. What happened to personal responsibility? You “suspected” he was with “other women”. You got knocked up and now black men are at fault for that?
Barak Obama is catering to black women because they are a strong “voting block”. He will never say ” damn black women close your legs and pick the right man”. I have the luxury of doing that because I am not a politician or an editor employed by anybody. The truth conflicts with political correctness.
I wouldn’t tell you the truth, If I didn’t care about black women. You are still doing the “same” tired arguments from like 10-15 years ago. Black men need to be better “fathers” and etc. That is true but you need to “start” being with men “you knew” was with other women. You can’t be that damn naive.
Also, you mean to tell me, the supposed “middle class black women” that I allegedly speak “badly” of, can excel in academics. But can’t seem to pick the right man that will stick around for their kids.
You also this
“You’re talking to a Black woman who works extensively in my community, someone who’s watched her parents and grandparents work in Black communities so your baseless statements about complaining and doing nothing are very far off. But talking to you is pointless because you are too ignorant for your own good, you’ve referred to me as “nappy head”…”sellout black woman”….”cotton picking Negro”….”black women catching the “Tatt” bitchassness flu” and stereotypes like ‘Beauty School” and then say “I ain’t apologizing for shit I say about black women”
I am proud of your service in the black community. As for the other statements, you left out my other comments like “loose booty” , “slut bucket (That was new). The bitchassness flu was a classic. LOL People call each other names on here all the time. Get real.
Back to being serious, you said this….
” Blacks are not responsible for the lack of good schools in their neighborhoods their economic disparity is and their lack of opportunities starts of vicious cycle of lack of achievement.”
The school is not the problem , nor the teachers. The problem is this entitlement “generation” of children with every video game under the sun and the parents “unwilling” to discipline them. You blame the teacher but won’t spend 2 hours with your kid to go over his homework or help him or her with it. You hardly attend PTA meeting to check your child’s progress. You don’t ask for the email address of the teacher. But can email 2 white men and schedule rendezvous with them like “Bama” does.
WHAT IS REALLY GOING ON? (CHRIS ROCK VOICE)
You have kids in Africa that would love a free public education. A bad “school here” (pointing here) is a damn ‘PRIVATE school” in Africa and other “third world countries”. Everybody wants to blame the school! You need to blame the parents. Even if the teacher was “not the best”, they give kids books to read and resources. They give them “journals” and assignments. They give them pencils, crayons, math books, and Mac computers. You want the teacher “wipe your kid’s ass and rock them to bed now”? Come the ‘FUCK ON”.
Lastly, we call each other names. I got no problem with that. We just differ on what ” is working for black women and black people”. The topic just shifted from dating to schools.
Anyway, Bri you kind of suffering from the “bitchassness flu”. I am working on a cure for black women. Man look for that “IF TOMORROW COMES FOR SELLOUT BLACK WOMEN’.
The follow up Blog Album ” THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW FOR SELLOUT BLACK WOMEN”. That will be released later in the week.
I will have to reread the Bri post because she jumped all over the place. This post was long enough.
I can’t do it in one post.
Comment by Bri on 12 March 2010:
You need to brush up on your comprehension skills as I did attribute the negative perception of Black women to society, I did say however that you agreeing with a biased view of your own race explicitly as it relates to the women of your race is stupid. Just because a racist society stereotypes your community is not grounds to agree with it. The problem with you quoting statistics is that you are connecting them to color when the statistics you are quoting are the result of economic status, not race. I’m also not sure why you’re repeating statistics about Latinos that I already mentioned, however the fact that statistics between minority groups who both have high poverty rates are similar is my point….none of the generalizations you mentioned are exclusive to women of a specific color, you simply choose to make it seem that way and that is what is offensive. I never said you called all Black women poor what I did say was that you took statistics about poor women and tried to use them as a representation of all Black women. Obama does not cater to Black women, he caters to the entire U.S. population but when the President of the United States sees fit to take time out his national agenda for no other reason than to address the lack of Black men accepting the responsibility of fatherhood after they make children speaks volumes about the Black men from low income communities where these negative trends are seen the most. All I did was bring to your attention that you are quoting statistics that have nothing to do with color as they relate to women while conveniently ignoring the wealth of statistics that exist for men from these same communities. You choose to stereotype Black women but do not give equal attention to statistics that exist about Black men because that would require you to stereotype yourself. You and Fenway both keep saying “by your own admission”……and then quote things I’ve never said….you typed “By your own admission, black women from all social classes are having some dating problems”…..I never said that, I primarily only focused on one social class in my previous post anyway so I’m not sure why you’re fabricating statements to bolster your argument. But if that’s what you want to argue then it would be fair to say that since the majority of Black women are in relationships with Black men but are experiencing “problems” as you say perhaps those problems arise from your demographic and not mine. Single motherhood is as much a reflection of the father as the mother. I just love how single motherhood carries a stigma for the woman but a father walking out on his children does not carry an equal stigma for the man. All the nonsense you put forth about Black women and their children is an equal statement about the Black men with which those children were made….which is why the remainder of your comments reflect back on yourself and not Black women. So your statement, “Perhaps, they should have seminars for black women to pick the right men to “father” their children,” is really saying since the majority of Black women have children fathered by Black men then the first lesson of those “seminars” would be, whatever you do, don’t have children with a Black man, correct? Essentially as a Black man that is what you are saying about yourself. And then when you say, “You can ‘weed” out the men “that do not stick around for your child,” I suppose that would involve considering all Black men unfit? So according to you I guess Black women should stereotype Black men in the same ways you’ve chosen to stereotype us? And I suppose for a Black woman “picking the right man” would mean picking whichever man isn’t Black? If middle class Black women exhibit the same rates of single motherhood as low income Black women (which is hearsay and remains to be proven) it’s not likely that they can’t pick the right men, instead it’s likely that they are picking Black men and it’s the statistics about absentee fathers that hold true across class divides which inevitably influence statistics about single motherhood. You choose to look at statistics about our community as flaws Black women have…who’s to say in actuality it’s not that Black men of all classes are deadbeat dads and that is what accounts for rates of single motherhood across class?….instead you choose to say every Black woman chooses an unsuitable partner, meanwhile 90% of Black women are in relationships with Black men….wouldn’t that mean the unsuitable partners are you?
Calling someone names is one thing but it’s interesting that you as a Black man would take derogatory terms that White racists once used on all of us and use them on Black women….you have a very ignorant sense of humor.
If school reform were not directly related to academic success and furthermore if secondary education did not serve as a platform to higher education opportunities and career success then our president would not be working to improve schools now…he would just tell all students suffering in poor school systems to get over it. You can’t just make up facts as you please to help make your statements sensible. A student’s performance in school is the burden of the child’s parents but the state of the school itself does effect that child’s academic growth and it’s no secret that low income communities have poor schools…i.e. less avenues through which younger generations can seek opportunities out of these communities to create lifestlyes other than what they see everyday. I didn’t turn the conversation from dating to schools I just drew attention to one of several factors starting from childhood that influence one’s endpoint…so while you choose to make generalizations about Black female adults you fail to give adequate attention to the environments in which these same Black children started, mind you by children I mean both boys and girls, therefore Black men exhibit the same shortcomings in adulthood you try to pin on Black women only. You rely solely on stereotypes to make your points and not facts. Like when you wrote: “You blame the teacher but won’t spend 2 hours with your kid to go over his homework or help him or her with it. You hardly attend PTA meeting to check your child’s progress. You don’t ask for the email address of the teacher. But can email 2 white men and schedule rendezvous with them like “Bama” does.” You are singling out a person in this forum you do not know and assuming things about their life, parenting skills and involvement in their child’s education based on nothing other than their race and gender….you are the very opposite of intelligent. Mac computers, journals?!? You’re funny…I don’t know too many schools in low income communities that have those things but I know a lot of schools in middle and upper class communities that do. So because more Blacks live below poverty than Whites you take the characteristics of these communities and attribute them to being Black and because more Whites live in upper and middle class communities you take the trends from those communities and attribute them to Whiteness? ??? Everything you mentioned has nothing to do with race. If everyone in American society switched places…if the majority of Whites lived below poverty and the majority of Blacks were upper class then the statistics that exist about Blacks would instead describe Whites and the statistics that exist about Whites would describe Blacks. You choose to glorify individuals of a certain race at the expense of your own based on differences that are the result of socioeconomic status.
And you keep repeating the same jokes hun, I advised you to work on your routine but I guess that was setting the expectations too high. I can’t imagine a single person who would reread and reread your CAPSLOCK foolishness and actually find it funny. Send my condolences to your Black wife and whatever students you plan on teaching in the future, you are obviously chockfull of lovely lessons about why Black women are such lowly creatures. And since you love to keep referencing statistics about Black women here are a few tokens of reality for your insufficient intellect: The incarceration rate of Black males is seven times that of Black females….80% of Black children live in fatherless homes as compared to 40% of children of other races….rates of drug abuse are highest among Black men…..and the rubbish about STDs is entertaining when you consider the rate of incarceration of Black men, in other words the number of Black men shacking with their prison cellmates, and the rate of homosexuality among Black men I don’t think it’s hard to infer that Black men have the highest rates in terms of STDs either…as a matter of fact the rates of STDs among Black women have been directly linked to the fact that Black women sleep with Black men…those reports hit the public way back when I was in high school, it brought to light that the rates of STDs were markedly high among middle-aged MARRIED Black women as a direct result of the number of BLACK MEN taking erectile dysfunction medicines to force themselves to have erections and engaging in extramarital affairs and unprotected sex with women and men (remember, on the downlow was a term created thanks to your demographic) without their wives knowing. So whereas Black women may exhibit trends that are higher compared to White women these same trends are damn near non-existent when compared to the sheer magnitude of the statistics that exist about Black men. Those statistics trump all, regardless of race AND gender, Black men take the cake. The difference between me and you is I don’t choose to pigeonhole individuals I do not know into a stereotype based on the color of their skin, however since you choose to do so about Black women but ignore the fact that many of these statistics are relationship dependent (i.e. relating to parenthood and sexual partners) and the majority of Black women are in relationships with Black men then what you are really saying is that as a Black women the best thing I can do to avoid becoming a statistic is to have nothing to do with Black men……thanks for bringing that to my attention Lauren, I’ll be sure to spread the word to fellow Black women, I’ll let them know it’s been Negro approved =)
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 12 March 2010:
(Drinking orange juice)
You wrote a long winded post again. I am starting to see a pattern here. People complain I twist their posts. Obviously, this long post would take my weeks to reply back. I will just keep it simple.
Bri said this
“The problem with you quoting statistics is that you are connecting them to color when the statistics you are quoting are the result of economic status, not race.”
Statistics also addresses race. Economic status is not the sole reason why 48 percent of higher of black women have herpes. Try again….
You also said this……..
“however the fact that statistics between minority groups who both have high poverty rates are similar is my point….none of the generalizations you mentioned are exclusive to women of a specific color, you simply choose to make it seem that way and that is what is offensive.”
You continue to be confused. How can I make anything seem a “way”? You just said minority groups have high poverty rates. You turn around and say it is not exclusive to women of color. HUH????? White people are the larger race in the country. Proportionally they have a lower poverty rate in comparison to Hispanic and Black people proportionally to their race.
You said this….
“You choose to stereotype Black women but do not give equal attention to statistics that exist about Black men because that would require you to stereotype yourself. You and Fenway both keep saying “by your own admission”……and then quote things I’ve never said….you typed “By your own admission, black women from all social classes are having some dating problems”…..I never said that, I primarily only focused on one social class in my previous post anyway so I’m not sure why you’re fabricating statements to bolster your argument.”
Where are the “stereotypes”? Black women of all social classes are not having dating problems now?? Fabricate what exactly? What social class are you “focusing on”? You generalize too. I just read your long winded post concerning the “downlow” thing. Everybody generalize to some degree.
You said this….
“You rely solely on stereotypes to make your points and not facts. Like when you wrote: “You blame the teacher but won’t spend 2 hours with your kid to go over his homework or help him or her with it. You hardly attend PTA meeting to check your child’s progress. You don’t ask for the email address of the teacher. But can email 2 white men and schedule rendezvous with them like “Bama” does.” You are singling out a person in this forum you do not know and assuming things about their life”
(Laughing) You got me on the Bama thing. I couldn’t help myself. As for some children’s parents not putting in the time with their child after school, that is actually true. I actually talk to “teachers” about it. I am sorry you hate the harsh realities of life. I work in a school. I work with kids in their “home”. My facts are the fact, that a good amount of minority children in urban schools are not graduating “high school”. What are you blind or something? You want the teacher to be a “social worker”. Even if the school was crumbling, that is no excuse “not to learn”. Stop fucking blaming the teachers and schools. My father couldn’t afford to go to school. He was in shed with a candle reading a book as a youngster. My father grew up in extreme poverty with his sisters and brothers. My mother was very privileged growing up and went to private schools. I am not trying to hear that shit. Parents should be more involved in their child’s education PERIOD!
You said this
“those reports hit the public way back when I was in high school, it brought to light that the rates of STDs were markedly high among middle-aged MARRIED Black women as a direct result of the number of BLACK MEN taking erectile dysfunction medicines to force themselves to have erections and engaging in extramarital affairs and unprotected sex with women and men (remember, on the downlow was a term created thanks to your demographic) without their wives knowing”
Black men are taking erectile dysfunction medicines to “force” themselves to have “extramarital” affairs and unprotected sex with women. This is why black women fail. I use date very intellectual black women. Obviously, it never lasted long because they say “statements” like these. The smarter the black woman, the more socially awkward she is. All I can do is laugh.
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
(waiting taking a tissue and wiping my eyes)
Lastly, you said this….
“majority of Black women are in relationships with Black men then what you are really saying is that as a Black women the best thing I can do to avoid becoming a statistic is to have nothing to do with Black men……thanks for bringing that to my attention Lauren, I’ll be sure to spread the word to fellow Black women, I’ll let them know it’s been Negro approved =)”
You do what you have to do. Petty threats will not deter black men. It all the same excuses. The “evil” black men is humping me and giving me “stds”. I simply have no control of my body. I can’t even control the type of man that could father my children.
Go take that to Oprah or Russia Today news. Fenway don’t even respond to you. I find you amusing though.
First you say “don’t take stock” in statistics. Then you read off statistics about black men. LOL
Like Obama said “You can’t have it both ways”. LOL
Back to work.
Comment by shasha on 13 March 2010:
America is a pretty big place, everyone’s experiences are different. The backwoods barber shop/beauty shop talk really has no place in today’s dialogue regarding race, love, sex, life, money, family, etc.
My mama never allowed us to begin a sentence with, “all Black people…” or “all White people…” ever! We have got to get over the name-calling and over generalizing!!
Some say I’m from another planet. Hell yeah, and I’m here to squash stereotypes and blast narrow-mindedness. I’ve got my ray gun loaded!
Comment by Bri on 13 March 2010:
I pointed out statistics dumbass because you did and that’s my point…you stereotype Black women based off of statistics so I brought it to your attention that the same statistics exist about Black men but to a much greater degree. So if that’s how you choose to view individuals then you should be well aware of how you appear should someone choose to stereotype you as a Black man based on statistics. You are exceptionally slow—-statistics that relate to economic class don’t just magically become characteristics of a specific race just because there are higher concentrations of a particular race in a certain economic class. If that were the case then it would be perfectly sound for me to say all Black men are criminals, deadbeat dads, fags, and druggies for no other reason than the fact that they are Black…that’s what you’re telling me? But I guess that much is expected from someone who by his own admission (that’s your favorite phrase right?) can’t read, comprehend and respond to a post in a single sitting.
My mother works in a school…two of my cousins work in schools…I’ve worked in schools…a lot of people in my family work in the field of education and the majority in schools that service low income communities so no you cannot put forth generalizations and then say, “oh these are facts because I work in schools”…perhaps you should try again. Yet another example of you making up things as you go along and trying to pass them off as facts because you assume I’m so gullible I’ll just agree. I never said teachers should be social workers braindead…your inability to read simple sentences is very annoying. I have to spend the majority of my time explaining to you that half of the shit you “quote” is not even present in what I typed. I acknowledged that the burden of responsibility in terms of education is on the parent(s) but that does not mean that the state of schools in low income communities with high concentrations of minorities does not influence individual achievement in adulthood…the very same adults you stereotype, or rather you restrict your stereotypes specifically to women. It’s also ironic that you would keep drawing attention to parental roles when, what was that number again, EIGHTY PERCENT of Black children are fatherless?? hmmmm, so I guess yet again everything you are saying reflects back more onto Black men than it does Black women? Nice job, Lauren, nice job.
By your own admission you have been to jail. By your own admission you do not have an undergraduate degree….you just “learn things any way you can as you go along”….that’s like sooooo cute!!! By your own admission you work two jobs just to do “the best you can”..that’s even cuter…what woman could say no to that? So you are overemployed and undercompensated…typical average joe in bondage to White America, your ability to not be a statistic is amazing Queensy, just amazing! So let me get this, Black women are all incarcerated with STDs and out of wedlock children….so says the uneducated ex-detainee? So I guess by your own admission your Black wife should “keep her legs closed” to you to prevent becoming a statistic, right? By your own admission you are exactly the type of loser Black man us Black women are so stupid for dating, eh? Isn’t that how you said it?
What’s really going on is you, like a lot of Black men, feel the need to try to degrade Black women in any way possible, by quoting numbers and making generalizations that are not representative of the majority of Black women. 48% of Black women have an STD? Well if the rate of contracting AIDS is twice as high for Black men, how many Black men have STDs? Did your father teach you the same math he learned by candlelight? Can you figure that one out or is that one of the things you didn’t learn as “you went along learning things in whatever way you could”…you sound like such a Sambo even saying that, like when I hear that phrase I imagine Hoke learning how to spell from driving Ms. Daisy. ^__^ So I guess for every Laurelton with a criminal record there are zero Bri’s but seven times as many you’s…..and for every Black woman with a degree there are twice as many you’s without one and for everyone Black woman with a STD there are twice as many Black men with one…and furthermore those women most likely were infected by a Black man. You like stereotyping based on statistics right? Was that fun for you? We could run off numbers all day long, it will just continue to concrete all the ways in which Black men come up short, which is why it’s odd that you as a Black man would even introduce statistics into the conversation, considering the plethora of numbers that describe Black men. You yourself are a walking, living, breathing statistic jailbait and uneducated yet you have the audacity to try to lump all Black women into a stereotype based on statistics that apply to less than half of Black women. How many of the Black women in this thread do you seriously think have an STD?…..I don’t know, do women’s prisons consider blogging and visitng forums recreational activity…are the Black women here typing from beyond the bars of their cells? I’m willing to bet that the majority of the female contributors to this thread are educated as well, much unlike yourself. I guess you stereotype your female counterparts to distract from how much of a negative stereotype of a Black man you are!!
But it’s nothing new…men of other races compete with other men, Black men compete with Black women…I’m flattered. That’s the common theme among all of you, whenever you come across a Black woman who is more educated and/or successful than you, you try to find new ways to invalidate her accomplishments…and then when you have absolutely nothing to go on you invent things…so far I’ve been in a movie, I’ve contracted the flu and my education doesn’t count because I’m not a White female….your collective game is miserable, weak doesn’t even begin to describe it. Collectively, the whole lot of you could stand to spend your time better…one of those ways could be trying to find the penises you lost during slavery instead of seeing a successful Black woman as a threat. You imitate rich White men and instead of using whatever success you achieve by doing so to benefit Black communities you instead try to lord it over the very people in those communities. Next time you come across a Black women who’s doing her job and yours, which by your own admission you are unwilling to do, (remember that whole bit about how proud the lot of you were by just how great your inability to impact us as a people was?) you should just sit down and move out of the way. The responses in this thread were simply the result of Black women understanding the potential Black media has to affect our cultural perceptions of ourselves as it relates to people of other races and the fact that we are minorities. So it’s not surprising that a Black man would come along and comprehend zilche of what is being said…it all makes perfect sense as you are not as involved in impacting the Black experience positively as some of your female counterparts and proud of it on top of that, by your own admission. I’m also not surprised that a Black man would use insults based on physical appearance as a first resort when coming across a Black woman who speaks on behalf of us as a people or on behalf of herself. You couldn’t even keep it intellectual for a few sentences—just straight to the outdated hodgepodge of “you’re an overeater with nappy hair and big lips,” However, calling us Shaniqua, quoting numbers that apply to less than half of Black females and name calling isn’t going to stop Black women from going to school, pursuing education and careers, serving their communities, being independent, and standing up for ourselves and challenging the derogatory misconceptions society as a whole and Black men choose to believe about Black women ….you can continue to just spew insults to try to get us to slow down so you can catch up but it hasn’t worked to date and won’t work in the future. That’s why the other people stopped responding, because there is nothing to say….you could stand to take a page from their book.
Usually the slow kid in class is good at being a class clown but you are unsuccessful at committing to either—> epic fail. First you write jokes that flop, so you rewrite them and they still suck. Then you sound like a tap dancing butler in Blackface with your, “oh–nobody knoooowwwsss my strugggle, I didn’t go to school, my daddy read by candellight” but you run off numbers like you work for the Census Bureau and want someone to take the negative things you say about Black women seriously. Okay….your best bet would be to pick one: dumb or simple and work on really honing that trait, at least then you would be consistent.
So let’s see…you’ve caught more cases than you have degrees and Ichibod by his own admission finds the other male members of this forum to be cute…hmmm, your demographic has relied on quoting drug addicts and racist terms from yesteryear to make statements about Black women…what are you 0 for 3 now…I mean we’ve got a queen, a con, and an underachiever….I don’t have to quote anything to stereotype you all because the more you type the more you reveal….you just make it sooo easy!
And yes, I imagine you do have work to do, just keep on and keep on shuffling until you make it to where the majority of Black women already are, all the while shouting futile insults as though that’s going to get you there quicker.
Comment by Bri on 13 March 2010:
It’s unfortunate that Black men like you misrepresent the greater collective…it makes it hard to weed out the good ones who are actually about something when the ignorant Black men like you are the ones hellbent on being so vocal about your ignorance.
Comment by neverdun17 on 13 March 2010:
@ Bri
As a writer, a speaker, and a student of the mind, I have thoroughly enjoyed watching the development of your arguments with Laurelton. It has been something akin to watching a duel between Joan of Arc and a petty duke who incurred her righteous wrath lol. Ever the pragmatist, I don’t have to agree with everything you have said to respect the mind behind the argument; similar to respecting the skill of the swordswoman behind the sword, whether I entirely agree with her ideology or not. I’d like to carry a discussion off of this forum, whether its related to this topic or not. Lol I have not forgotten why I joined this site to begin with ;-).
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 14 March 2010:
Dear Bri
This whole tirade you wrote does not even make sense. I just cut and paste what you said earlier. I replied to you with my points. You continue to complain about me “twisting your words”.
Some people can’t even get 1 job. I have two jobs. I have nothing to prove because I live very comfortable. I have my own house and car. I doubt you even have that. So save the posturing for somebody that plays that game.
You just said this…………
“You are exceptionally slow—-statistics that relate to economic class don’t just magically become characteristics of a specific race just because there are higher concentrations of a particular race in a certain economic class. If that were the case then it would be perfectly sound for me to say all Black men are criminals, deadbeat dads, fags, and druggies for no other reason than the fact that they are Black…that’s what you’re telling me? But I guess that much is expected from someone who by his own admission (that’s your favorite phrase right?) can’t read, comprehend and respond to a post in a single sitting.”
1 out of 4 black men are have been in the criminal justice system or incarcerated ( I didn’t bother doing the research). It is reasonable to believe that society might think most black men are criminals and etc. See, I can admit that. Instead, you rant and rave about facts I say about black women that happen to be true. You are arguing with statistics. That is fine with me. What exactly you want me to say? The numbers are “racist”? LOL 48 percent of black women have herpes. The CDC said this not me. You want me to “lie about it”.
You already made generalizations about black men. You said they were on “Viagra” forcing themselves on black women. Some mentally ill comment. Do I have to cut and paste what you said again?
I will do it anyway.
This is what you said………
“Black men are taking erectile dysfunction medicines to “force” themselves to have “extramarital” affairs and unprotected sex with women.”
(Just looking in the air like wow) REALLY
Erectile dysfunction medicines??????????????
You also said this whine……………..
“My mother works in a school…two of my cousins work in schools…I’ve worked in schools…a lot of people in my family work in the field of education and the majority in schools that service low income communities so no you cannot put forth generalizations and then say, “oh these are facts because I work in schools”…perhaps you should try again. Yet another example of you making up things as you go along and trying to pass them off as facts because you assume I’m so gullible I’ll just agree. I never said teachers should be social workers braindead…”
Good for them. I work in a school too. Show me where I said generalizations that wasn’t true? Since you know the facts about “low income” schools. I said Teachers are “not social workers”. I never said you said it. Give me example of what I said that “wasn’t true”. Where do you stand on this topic concerning low income kids that don’t do that well in “low income schools”? Since you say I put words in your mouth.
You actually said this…..
” A student’s performance in school is the burden of the child’s parents but the state of the school itself does effect that child’s academic growth and it’s no secret that low income communities have poor schools…i.e. less avenues through which younger generations can seek opportunities out of these communities to create lifestlyes other than what they see everyday.”
OH, it is the burden of the child’s parents. I thought I was “stereotyping again”. “It’s no secret” now that low income communities have poor schools. What you are doing is wishful thinking. What I talk about is ‘reality”. Do these low income communities have poor Hispanic, black, and even white people?
You are misinformed about me. I have a Bachelor’s degree in Criminology/Sociology. I have never been convicted of a crime or have a “criminal record”. I can fax you the paperwork. How about yourself? Do you have a degree? Oh yea, I work in a majority white “rural” school. A majority of the elementary school children are “poor white children”. Overall, the kids are passing. They have the same “resources” majority “black” elementary schools have. In Philadelphia, the schools are atrocious and they get the bulk of the money for education. I live in Williamsport PA, an “rural” working class, white town. I am sick and tired of you “coddling” black youth. They need to understand it is not a game out in the “real world”. You worried about me telling the “truth”.
I really can’t respond to you’re poorly written critiques about me anymore. You have to use paragraphs when you write. Hopefully, you’re good “looks” will carry you through life.
What is the “point of your argument” anyway? You are upset that I am “using statistics” to back up my arguments. Something, you do not know how to do.
Copy and paste everything I say. Show me where I am wrong at. You must be still in college. Your parents pay your bills and you think you “know it all”. You really don’t want me to hurt your feelings. Listen, whining and complaining is not a “debate”. You think I give a fuck about how I come across. Show me where I said things “not true” concerning “topics”.
When I attack people “personally”, I am being sarcastic. I could care less if they are in sexy lingerie waiting for two white men in Alabama. I can get in the gutter if necessary. It all depends on how people “talk to me”.
Anyway, go to your college library and take a English remedial class. You can at least put your statements into paragraphs. People tend to have problems with grammar. Seriously, put your thoughts in paragraphs and no more long posts. You can be concise with your thoughts.
It does not make you an intellectual to write such a long post. Maybe, a white man call tell you that. Obviously, I am not getting through to you.
Good day.
Comment by Mr Laurelton Queens on 14 March 2010:
I just caught that last statement you said…
“It’s unfortunate that Black men like you misrepresent the greater collective…it makes it hard to weed out the good ones who are actually about something when the ignorant Black men like you are the ones hellbent on being so vocal about your ignorance.”
Oh, I am not a good black man because I tell the truth. I have a degree, no kids, a residence, and two jobs. LOL This is the exact reason black women fail. LOL The same thing they praise white men for. They penalize “black men” for. You better get used to me. I plan to be around for a “long time”. I call it being persistent. Black men like me are “the greater collective”. If you want a man to sit down and “pee”, I am pretty sure there are plenty of them around. Feel free to reply again. I don’t mind spanking you once again!
You have a nice day.