Archive for March, 2008

3 minute sex is sufficient research confirms

Thursday, March 27th, 2008

“Break me off, show me what you got,
Coz I don’t want no one minute man�

Remember Missy Elliott & Trina saying they don’t want a minute man while Ludacris says he isn’t a minute man and can make the sex last in Missy’s hip hop single “One Minute Man”? So how about 2 minutes … or 3 minutes?

I know when women are talking to the girls about their boyfriends’ sexual prowess, or we boyfriends bragging how we can last and last, we always talk about 7 minutes as the lowest we have ever made it last.

A poll conducted by online dating site Partner4Real.com has confirmed recent research out of the U.S. that three minute sex is adequate, and 7-13 minute sex is ideal. Over 2,000 members were polled, with an overwhelming 65 percent saying that anything over 13 minutes is too long, and that 3-7 minutes is the ideal amount of time.

Brett Smith, a dating and health expert said that the above studies reflected what most Australians already know but rarely admit to. Much as 25% of the women said that 7-13 minute sex was ideal, extended foreplay was still a big part of their expectations. Men on the other hand preferred a reduction in the pre-sex activities.

This US study published in the international Journal of Sexual Medicine, is the first to review the ‘ideal length of time to have penetrative sex’ by randomly sampling Americans and Canadians. Well 7-13 minutes is the most desirable.

“Our poll highlights the difference between the commonly held belief that the longer the sex the better, and what really happens in the bedrooms of Australia,” stated Smith. And another interesting finding was that 72% of the males felt the pressure to perform longer than five minutes … something that Smith sites as more of a peer pressure factor than pressure from their partners. You know, going by the one song on a CD is long enough theory! ;-)

Well, the above isn’t just some Australian or U.S. or Canadian issue. I am sure everywhere in the world, people would rather play along with the-longer-the-better version … just to sound strong than admit that 3 minute sex can be equally fulfilling.

Which one would you rather? The tedious two-songs-long humping or 3 minutes of quality?

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Popularity: 38% [?]

Who’s the boss?

Tuesday, March 25th, 2008

In most households, women out-earn their husbands. And with women graduating with advanced degrees and running their own businesses, their role as the bread-winner is altering their role in marriage and family in general.

“Because of these dynamics, the rules of marriage have changed more in last 30 years than the previous 3,000,” says Stephanie Coontz, a family studies teacher and author of books on marriage and gender roles. This shift in gender roles requires as much of an adjustment from men as it does for women, who find themselves struggling to give up household duties and family tasks.

Some men are actually ok with being left at home with the children while their wives take charge of the finances. However, a large number feel emasculated when the wife is the bread-winner and are asked to take on more household chores and child-care responsibilities. And on the other hand, some women get resentful when they are expected to foot all the bills and at the same time, take a huge chunk of the domestic responsibilities.

And the battle doesn’t end just with the domestic chores … they always spill over to the bedroom. So who sends flowers on the wedding anniversary? Who’s the boss of the house when the wife is the breadwinner?

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Popularity: 34% [?]

Forsaking the sex and the city lifestyle

Tuesday, March 18th, 2008

Ever felt like everything around you just screams SEX!!!!!?

Well if you really think about it, where do you find the Cosmo magazine these days? Next time, take a trip to the grocery store and you won’t miss one at the checkout. And this is perhaps the least sexy place on earth. But then again, the grocery store is mad sexy … where do we get those strawberries we feed each other during foreplay?

Well this is our world now. I remember once, I hooked up a buddy of mine with a 30 year old hot chick. And when she confessed to being a virgin, he got disgusted. Can you believe this guy? Suddenly, we constantly ridicule virginity! What is disgusting about a woman who still has her V-card?

In this age where sexual mores are laid down by the ‘greatest inspiration’ Carrie Bradshaw of ‘Sex and the City,’ those that strive to attain a love that goes beyond sex are the rebels now. The rebels are pursuing Chastity - “that virtue by which we are in control of our sexual appetite rather than it being in control of us,â€? as Mark Lowery, associate professor of theology at the University of Dallas puts it.

The thing is we always leave the door open, so that the option of sex is available. Nowadays people have sex before marriage thinking that it will bring us closer to our partners. Question is, does it really? Or does it effectively cause us to put up emotional barriers? Well, from my own experience, all the sex I have had has even failed to help me be able to sustain a committed relationship.

But this Sex and the City era, how do the supposed joys of sexual freedom to use or be used, to separate emotions from sex and sex from commitment, make one truly free? Where is the joy in that? We allow other people to touch our bodies but not our hearts. We always take the shortcut to intimacy.

But, is sexless dating a good idea in this world of “you have to take a car for a test drive …� mentality? Is it possible to take the risk, forsake the sex-obsessed culture and let someone touch your heart?

Well, if you are fed up with this Sex and the City lifestyle, if you are fed up of using others and being used, then seeking chastity is the best way to go.

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Popularity: 38% [?]

Bedroom tales

Thursday, March 13th, 2008

What lies have you told in the bedroom?

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Popularity: 44% [?]

Relocating for love

Tuesday, March 11th, 2008

Dumping your career for the sake of love isn’t that easy. Now imagine having to leave it all behind … family, friends, a home and that career of yours.

Well, some woman did it. She was six month’s pregnant and when the husband asked her to do him a favor and move to Madrid, between her and the three words in her Spanish vocabulary, she couldn’t say no. But not every one is so quick to start parking up those boxes for a partner. Deciding whether or not to move is something that requires a lot of consideration. This move will either bring you closer or break you.

Speaking of relocation, with the current rise in online dating, people are now dating across continents. What if he or she asks you to leave it all and fly across that continent to be with him or her? Would you?

When should you rip up your life as you have always known it for the sake of a relationship?

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Popularity: 36% [?]

The metamorphosis of online dating

Thursday, March 6th, 2008

Just when i thought I had seen it all, I came across this one:

“Dating Cheating Wives is your ultimate site to find lonely, horny, married women looking for discreet sex on the side!”

Would you? Is this pushing the whole online dating business just a little too far? What happened to the sanctity of marriage?

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Popularity: 42% [?]

Life is no walk on the beach. So why should dating be?

Tuesday, March 4th, 2008

I was going on my normal business – looking for a topic to blog about. Then I got interested in this particular line: “Dating isn’t fair to men�. I really had to know why.

Well two reasons actually made me really feel that dating could actually be unfair to we men.

1. Well, there are taller and shorter men. Women tend to prefer taller men. Is that fair?
2. We men love our playboy magazines and other kinds of magazines that show perfect and beautiful women with perfect bodies. However, very few women are playboy perfect hence it is impossible for every man to have a woman that is that beautiful. Is that fair?
3. Some men have their inner game together and some don’t. Those who do end up having sex with hundreds – even thousands – of women. And those that don’t, end up as virgins for the rest of their lives.
4. Sometimes a woman will respond positively to you, then come the next day she’ll act all strange. We don’t understand women and it affects us in the dating arena.

But if you stop to think about it, every woman also wants to meet the perfect man. And do all of them get that? No they don’t. So dating isn’t only unfair to men … it just is unfair … period! You meet someone thinking they are the perfect match and you make them tick as they do you only to find them banging someone whom you think is beneath you.

But if you think about it, much as life and dating are unfair, this unfairness actually works to our advantage. We try to change for the better in order to correct this unfairness - turn the tables around in your favor. The unfairness drives us.

Life isn’t fair … why should dating be?

Do you really think dating favors women or is it just unfair in general? Any thoughts on how to turn this to one’s favor?

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Popularity: 26% [?]